Playing With Fire
by Katya92
Summary: Kai and Ray understood that their career's came first. But having not seen each other properly for some time the lack of sexual intimacy was beginning to grate. With tensions running high and temptations lurking at every corner, will the two resist and work it out? Or will a certain redhead's invitation prove too much? Yaoi. KaixRay
1. Denied

Chapter 1 - Denied

A/N: So I can't believe I'm actually posting this. Much love to Lux and BB for giving me the confidence to actually put this out there! I've been casually working on this for a few months now and have several chapters pre-written to post every so often. That is if I stop going back and editing everything xD I can just hear Lux now "LEAVE IT ALONE" yes mama..

No particular warnings in this little intro chapter, but if there is in future I'll be sure to mention it at the start.

This fic is yaoi. So if you ain't into the whole guy on guy thing then don't read.

I don't own beyblade or its characters.. although if I did.. Phwoar. Let's just not even go there.

"..." speech

'...' thoughts

[...] text message

Think that's it.. so.. enjoy!

* * *

Playing With Fire

Chapter 1 - Denied

Closing the laptop down after what felt like days of staring at it, strained crimson eyes glanced over to their right at the metal clock on the living room wall.

1:45am.

Kai had been working on these spreadsheets for hours, and with numbers starting to completely lose all meaning to him he figured it was time to log off and give it a rest for one night.

Sliding the device off of his lap with a deep sigh, he eased himself up from the couch and stretched, a few bones clicking in his back as he did so. He could feel the permanent tension now stored in his muscular shoulders as he rubbed over them with his thumbs.

Gazing around the peaceful dimly lit living room Kai remembered Ray had left to go up to bed some time ago.

Ray knew that once Kai was sat with that work laptop all conversation between them pretty much ceased and noise was to be kept to a minimum so he could concentrate.

Even the smallest of mistakes could be detrimental, and knowing that word would get back to his grandfather if he fucked up, Kai would be damned if he ever came across as anything less than perfect.

Kai did have a home office upstairs that he could work in but being the workaholic he was the two would _never_ see each other if he did all his paperwork in there. It was Ray's idea for him to purchase the laptop in the first place so that the two could at least be in the same room at times, even if they weren't talking.

Although it was late Kai felt surprisingly full of energy having just being sat staring at that thing for the past several hours.

He stood clearly restless in the middle of the room for a moment, loosely folding his arms over his chest as he wracked his brain and thought of what he could do to tire himself out or wind down or _something!_

The gym wouldn't be open at this time, so that was out.

It was currently pouring outside so he really didn't fancy going out for a run…

With an idea suddenly coming to him, a mischievous smile now danced upon the Russian's lips.

'_Wonder if Ray's still awake…'_

* * *

_x-x-x_

Kai and Ray were in their mid-twenties now and had been dating for around two years.

Though many years had passed since their beyblading days, they were both still very driven and ambitious men with the both of them being very successful in their chosen careers after retiring from the BBA.

Kai had to step up and take on the role as CEO of his grandfather's company after his arrest several years ago, and Ray worked as a head chef at a popular Asian fusion restaurant in the city. Both very exhausting and anti-social occupations.

So much so that their work schedules had conflicted something chronic lately and the two males hadn't really spent much time together at all over the past several weeks.

Whilst they both understood that their career's came first, the lack of sexual intimacy was beginning to grate, especially on the fire filled elder of the two.

"Kai, stop it I'm sleeping."

"But it's been ages come on… just a quickie.."

With a slight whine to his voice Kai held himself up on his forearm, gently moved a lock of long black hair out the way and began to place delicate kisses on Ray's bare shoulder as he spooned him under the bed covers, trailing them up all the way to his neck.

He knew Ray liked that.

"Kai, _seriously_, I've got to go into work early tomorrow… knock it off."

Trying to sound as threatening as his half asleep self could muster, Ray rubbed his neck to diminish the tickle sensation left by the Russian's kisses.

Shuffling away slightly he snuggled himself further into the warm bed sheets, hoping they'd provide him with some sort of protection from his persistent boyfriend.

Kai cocked a brow at Ray's pathetic attempt to retreat from him.

Sure their king sized bed was pretty spacious. But he could really only get so far away from him before he was off the edge and on to the floor.

_'I don't think so Kon…'_

Not preparing to give up that easily, Kai got closer behind him again, his hips pressed up against Ray's ass as he caressed his tanned arm under the covers.

Going underneath his arm he stroked down his torso through his white tank top before stopping at his crotch. Returning from where he left off Kai went back to kiss Ray's neck up to his ear, where he began to nibble on the lobe lightly.

"Don't you want me Ray?" Kai whispered seductively into Ray's ear.

Ray's eyes remained closed as he pleaded with him.

"I do Kai, just not right now.. Come on, it's late."

With a sleepy sigh the younger male gently redirected Kai's hand away from his crotch and attempted to go back to sleep.

Kai clenched his jaw as he glared at the back of Ray's head.

Defeated, and without saying a word, he abruptly moved away from him, back to his own side of the bed and turned onto his side in a huff.

The two males backs now faced each other.

Having sensed Kai's clear disappointment and the weird tension that now lingered in the air, Ray caved in and groggily opened up his golden eyes that bore a dullened glaze from his lack of sleep.

'_Why is it he can reject me when he's tired from work, and that's fine, but when I do it I'm made to feel bad about it?'_

Forever putting Kai's feelings before his own, Ray lazily rolled over with a sleepy sigh to face Kai's back and weakly placed an arm over his torso.

Kai took the arm and shoved it off of him.

Taken slightly back, yet unsurprised at the same time at his hostility Ray propped himself up on his arm and looked at the back of Kai's head.

"Don't be like that Kai…" A hint of annoyance laced his voice as he spoke.

He really could not be bothered with one of Kai's tantrums right now and had absolutely no intentions of pandering to him.

This was just childish.

He was fucking tired. He'd said that to him. Not just once – twice!

Work was busy. So much so he had to go in even earlier than usual tomorrow to prep.

All Ray wanted to do was just cuddle and go to sleep. Why was that so difficult?!

"No, forget it, go to sleep." Kai didn't move as he replied with a slight bite to his tone.

He had completely lost all interest in whatever this was or fixing to be.

All he wanted to do was have a good fuck before bed.

Ray didn't even have to do anything, just lay there and enjoy it.

He wasn't tired in the slightest; the least he could've done was just given it up for him.

Why was that so difficult?

It had been _weeks_ since they last did anything. Oh but _now_ he wants to spoon?

Well, he'd be damned if he was going to accept any attempt to be intimate with someone who just straight out rejected him.

"Just let me spoon you Kai."

Ray swallowed his pride once more and placed his hand on Kai's muscular arm which was promptly shoved back off again.

"No. You're tired right? So go to sleep."

Ray sighed through his nose and turned back over to his original sleeping position with his back facing Kai's.

_'Oh fuck off dude. I do __**not**__, have the energy for this right now. I'll make it up to you… just right now... I'm too… tired…'_

It wasn't long before Ray's body started to twitch as sleep took over him. His breathing becoming a soft purr as he began to dream.

Kai glared at nothing in particular as darkness filled their bedroom. It was probably a good thing he couldn't see much as his eyes would've burned a hole right through whatever he'd gotten full focus on.

Having felt Ray move away and presumably with his back towards him again he began to slightly regret his stubborn outburst.

Whilst he liked his own bed space and could never completely fall asleep being held or holding someone else, Kai had grown quite accustomed to the several minutes the two usually shared embraced before going their separate ways to drift off.

Now he was just left wide awake with nothing but frustration.

_'Well fuck you too Ray. You're gonna regret that.'_


	2. Jagged Lines

Chapter 2. Jagged Lines.

Kai and Ray had been living together in their first home for around several months now and had just refurbished their kitchen-diner a few weeks back.

When they first moved in, Kai had said in the beginning that due to money being no issue for him he would gladly take the brunt of the renovation costs if it meant everything could be completed straight away.

He didn't see the need in waiting around when they really didn't need to.

Ray however, being the proud man he was, was adamant that as it was his home too everything should be completely 50/50 and wanted all costs to be split between them equally.

He knew that Kai had more money than sense, and that realistically Ray didn't even need to work. But he didn't want to just be kept like a trophy wife and so this meant that the home improvements had to be a slow and steady process so as to not completely screw up his finances and drain his savings.

So on top of their busy work schedules causing the two to not often see each other, the mess that was the house due to Ray's pride was also another hindrance for the two, and it had caused a fair few arguments along the way.

By month two of living there Kai was beyond irritated with the slow process and would often just pay a team to come in and renovate whilst Ray was at work.

* * *

x-x-x

_**4 months ago.**_

"So when were you going to tell me Kai that you just paid to put in a whole new bathroom?"

Ray crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head, his clearly annoyed amber eyes fixed on Kai's back who was sat in his office at the computer.

"Or were you just hoping I wouldn't notice?"

Kai continued to type away on his keyboard, his attention staying focused on the screen as he plainly responded.

"It wasn't expensive Ray, don't worry about it. Just, pay me back when you can I guess."

Ray scoffed.

"Wasn't expensive? The wall tiles literally have gold flakes embedded in them, and there are crystals in the ceiling! Actual freakin' crystals Kai! Who are you trying to fool here? How much was it all, and _don't_ lie?"

Kai exhaled as he nonchalantly spoke.

"I don't know, like, two and a half grand or something.. The company owed me a favour so did it on the cheap. Seriously Ray, don't worry about it."

"No, I _will _worry about it!" Ray took out his cell phone and opened up his online banking app.

"1250 is going into your account right now... _Next_ time Kai, consult me first please? I can't afford to be doing all of these improvements this fast." He warned as he shoved his phone back into his trouser pocket before turning on his heel to leave the office in a strop.

Kai lightly shook his head before immediately opening up another tab on his internet browser and logged into his own bank account.

= R. Kon ) + 1,250  
= Bathrooms R Us ) – 50,000

Kai then proceeded to set up several scheduled payments of small amounts to drip feed the 1250 back into Ray's account.

He'd done that with the cost of the drive-way, the complete new rewire of the house, and the kitchen diner.

He was kinda surprised Ray hadn't noticed to be honest...

'_Well.. What he doesn't know won't hurt him.' _Kai thought to himself with a smile.

x-x-x-x

* * *

It had just gone 6:30am and the sun had barely started to rise.

It wasn't an uncommon occurrence for Kai to be the last to go to bed yet the first to get up, and today was one of those mornings.

In the living room with a black coffee in hand, Kai stared out into their derelict back yard through the closed French doors, still clearly seething from last night's rejection.

Waking up alone wasn't an uncommon occurrence for Ray, and once again it was one of those mornings. Though today it shouldn't have been. Ray knew that Kai wasn't going into the office today so why was he up so early?

'_He better not still be annoyed about last night... the big baby._'

Pulling back the soft linen bed sheets, Ray sluggishly made his way into their en-suite bathroom and hopped in the shower.

Hearing the shower water running from downstairs the brooding Russian glanced up at the ceiling before taking another sip of his coffee.

'_Try not to drown. Dickhead.'_

After around twenty minutes, Ray came downstairs with a bounce in his step and went into the kitchen to make himself some cereal.

Wearing his usual work attire that consisted of smart black trousers and a white polo shirt with the restaurants logo sewn on, his hair was also up in its normal fashion, though slightly fluffier from the shower.

With bowl in hand Ray entered the living room to see Kai sat on the couch reading a book. His focus staying on the pages as he walked past him.

Unfazed by the lack of acknowledgment Ray made his way over to the glass doors and chirpily spoke out before taking a spoonful of cereal.

"Good morning! And such a beautiful one too! We really need to get this yard sorted out at some point don't we babe?" Ray slurped another spoonful of cereal. "I should be getting a bonus from work in the next week or so, and summer's coming up so we should look into doing it soon. It'll be awesome when we can have the guys over for BBQ's and drinks and stuff wouldn't it?"

"Hn."

Turning round to face Kai on the couch amber eyes blinked as he swallowed the mouthful of cereal.

"Something wrong Kai?"

Seeing in his peripheral vision that Ray was now facing him, crimson eyes now refused to leave the paperback.

"Nope."

"Well.. there obviously is." Ray mumbled.

Glancing over the book at his interruption Kai's piercing eyes narrowed.

"If it's so obvious Ray then what's wrong?" He bit.

Ray casually shrugged his shoulders as he took another mouthful of cereal.

"Well I don't know that's why I'm asking."

Kai rolled his eyes before carelessly chucking his book beside him. This was stupid and he wasn't even reading the damn thing anyways.

"Just leave me alone. Eat your cereal."

Placing his bowl down on the glass coffee table in the centre of the room Ray knelt down in front of him. Resting his arms folded onto Kai's lap he set his chin on them and looked up at him.

"You talk like I don't know you. There's obviously something wrong Kai so why not just tell me what it is?"

Growing tired of the repetitive conversation Kai growled before glaring down at him.

"Well you can't know me that well because there's _nothing_ wrong. I was just here _minding_ my own business. I'm not usually one to be bouncing off the walls at any given time Ray, never mind first thing on a morning so what are you actually expecting from me?"

With a light sigh passing his lips, Ray rose back to his feet and picked up his cereal bowl again.

"Is it about last night?"

"I don't even care about that."

'_So that's a yes.'_

"Well if it _is_ about that, I'm sorry to have turned you down babe but I was exhausted. Works really busy at the moment and I just wasn't in the mood."

Kai knew deep down that he was being unreasonable but he was far too gone with the pissed off act to back down now.

He was over this conversation. He hated arguing with Ray.. and also hated how well he really did know him.

How _dare_ he understand him more than he understood himself!

Standing up from the couch Kai held his sneer as he turned to face Ray.

"I _said_ I didn't care. But even if I did, just know that there won't _ever_ be another chance for you to reject me again!"

And with that Kai stormed out of the living room, took himself upstairs and, Ray presumed by the slam of the bathroom door, have his own shower to cool off.

A mix of emotions now filled the neko-jin as he watched him leave.

A little saddened by the cold reception this morning; it had been a while since Kai had spoken to him like that.

Guilt, for having dismissed Kai's sexual advances last night.

I mean if he _had_ just gone along with it this whole thing would've been avoided... But as much as the Russian didn't like it, he knew Kai, along with all of his empty threats.

The only reason he ever usually acted out like this was if he was deeply hurt.

Kai missed him. Ray knew that. And knowing that, overall, he felt flattered.

Kai really had come a long way when it came to expressing himself.

With Ray he wasn't his infamous cold and stoic self. He was playful, and loving (in his own way of course) and Ray felt truly special knowing that out of all the people in the world, it was he that the ice prince chose to be that open and vulnerable with.

But Kai still had a long way to go when it came to expressing his feelings of disappointment.

He just couldn't accept that sometimes things just didn't go his way. But rather than talking about it, he chose to either lash out or skulk off by himself.

Ray understood though that with time, he'd get there. And in the meantime, he didn't mind reading between his lover's _very_ jagged lines.

Finishing off the last of his cereal Ray placed the bowl in the kitchen sink and took himself upstairs to finish getting ready for work.

Knocking on the bathroom door he leaned in close and awaited for the predictably hostile response.

"What do you want?" Kai's harsh toned voice echoed from inside the bathroom.

Smiling to himself Ray innocently replied, "To brush my teeth, I need to leave soon."

"Whatever."

Knowing that what Kai really meant to say was "_Oh yeah sure that's absolutely fine Ray, my love, come on in sexy boyfriend of mine." _Ray proceeded into the bathroom.

Hot steam filled the spacious tiled en-suite, instantly warming Ray's tanned skin as he entered.

To his left stood the white porcelain toilet and sink, and to his right, currently being occupied by the moody Russian, the glass cubicle shower.

Having a cheeky glance at Kai's wet toned body through the glass shower screen, Ray smirked to himself.

He may be a huge grump but by God he was hot...

Even though Kai currently had his back to him, facing towards the wall, his sharp instinct told him that he was being ogled at.

"Eyes that way Kon, you don't deserve to look at me."

Turning to face towards the sink Ray grinned, picked up his toothbrush and ran it under the tap.

"Oh give over your royal highness. If I didn't have to go to work I'd have you in that shower right now."

Kai scoffed.

"You'd be so lucky."

Trying to suppress the smirk tugging at his own lips, Kai squirted a blob of shampoo into the palm of his hand before lathering it into his slate coloured locks.

He really couldn't stay mad at Ray for long.

Squeezing the toothpaste onto his green toothbrush Ray spoke just a little louder to be heard over the running water and potential shampoo in Kai's ears.

"Do you think you'll get a chance to call someone about the back yard today?"

"Yeah, I'll get my assistant to sort it." Kai dully responded. Mentally adding that to the list of jobs he already had to do today.

Bringing the toothbrush in to his mouth Ray gazed into the mirror before him where he could conveniently see Kai in the reflection.

Amber optics could just make out the glossy figure through the steamed glass, watching as the lathered up shampoo bubbles slowly slid down Kai's muscular back before resting on his perfectly toned ass.

'_Phwoarr.._'

It wasn't until a familiar voice several minutes later brought the boy back to reality.

"You sure you've got any teeth left?"

"Hm?!"

With wide eyes Ray spat out the toothpaste and quickly rinsed out his mouth. He had no idea how long he'd been staring at him for.

"Shit I need to go now or I'm gonna be late. I'll see you when I get home handsome, let me know about the garden, love you!"

Quickly wiping his mouth on the back of his hand Ray dashed out of the bathroom and moments later out of the front door.

The house fell silent.

Turning off the water Kai stepped out of the shower and rubbed his hair roughly with a dark coloured towel before wrapping his lower half with it.

"Yeah love you too, moron." He said to himself with a small smile before leaving the bathroom and making a start on his own day.

* * *

x-x-x

It was officially the first day of summer and it'd been several days since Kai and Ray's last little argument. Ray had received his mid-year work bonus and things currently seemed fairly settled for the two.

"Tiffany sorted out a landscaper by the way… he's starting on Monday."

Kai called out as he jotted down various events that were coming up for the company that month on the glossy calendar that was hung up on the kitchen wall.

Summer was always a busy time for the company for some reason.

23 important meetings, 15 presentations, 3 charity events and an afternoon tea with Mr. Dickenson.

Noticing that Ray's ridiculously neat handwriting stopped for 2 of the squares next week, he spoke out with a hint of hope.

"You're off next weekend?"

Still in his dark blue pyjama bottoms Ray, who had the day off, joined Kai in the kitchen and walked over to the sink to place his plate from breakfast down on the marble counter.

"Yeah I can't remember the last time I had a weekend off. Can finally get some R + R.."

Letting out a yawn Ray stretched out his arms as he gazed out of the kitchen window at the neglected backyard.

"Ah, I can't wait 'til it's all finished out there, it's gonna look great." He added with a smile. "Does Tiff know them personally?"

Making his way then over to the calendar Ray hugged the suit clad Russian from behind and rested his chin on one of his broad shoulders.

"Nah don't think so… just someone who was recommended to her." Kai replied as he continued to write stuff on the calendar.

Ray's eyes gazed over the dates and it was then that he saw Kai too wasn't working that same weekend he was off.

"Heyy we could maybe do something together if you're off that same weekend. We could go see a movie or get a bite to eat or something." He said cheerfully.

Finishing up, Kai let go of the string attached pen and looked down by his shoulder at Ray with a suggestive smirk.

"Orr, we could always make dinner here and have a quiet night in.."

Kai then turned around to face Ray, resting his arms down by his waist.

Instantly placing his arms up on Kai's shoulders when he turned to face him, Ray looked into those pools of crimson he loved so much and spoke out with a cheeky smile flashing his fangs.

"Mm, sounds good to me Hiwatari.." He then prodded his finger on Kai's chest.

"_You're_ cooking though."

Kai smirked.

"That's _Mr._ Hiwatari to you, _Raymond, _but sure whatever." He placed a kiss on Ray's forehead before releasing him from his embrace.

"Anyways I'm going, probably gonna be a late one so don't wait up."

Walking out of the kitchen Kai made his way out into the hallway and picked up his black laptop case that was propped up against the bottom of the stairs.

"Uh huh, as usual."

Ray crossed his arms and casually leaned against the kitchen door frame, his smile softening as he watched Kai begin to make his way out of the house.

Unlike his ex-captain, Ray wasn't a huge fan of being home alone all day and really missed Kai while he was gone. It wasn't like he couldn't bear to be by himself, but he was a natural social butterfly and enjoyed being around others and having good company.

He'd be sure to keep himself occupied with _something_ until Kai got back home.

"I'll have dinner plated up for you for whenever you decide to return. Just microwave it for a few minutes."

Kai frowned at the younger male's unnecessary instructions.

"Yeah, thanks mum." He retorted.

Ray tutted.

"Shut up."

Unlocking the front door Kai looked back over his shoulder and spoke again, his voice dripping with his usual sarcasm. "I mean honestly I just don't know what I ever did without you honey."_  
_  
"Oh, fuck off. Sue me for caring." Ray jokingly bit as he rolled his amber eyes, a small smirk tugging at his lips.

"Go on, get out of here or you'll be late."

Picking up his car keys off the hook Kai opened the front door and stepped outside before turning to face him.

"You _do_ know I'm like, the boss, right?" A smug look now sat upon the Russian's face as he soaked up his own superiority. "I'll get there whenever I decide to get there."

Ray pushed himself off of the door frame, stood up straight and puffed out his chest before walking towards Kai at the door and spoke in a mocking tone.

"'Oh _you do know I'm the boss right?'_ – Only boss round here buddy is _me_" Ray pressed his index finger onto his chest before wafting his hands in a shooing motion.

"Now be gone with you, go, I can't tidy up round here with you under my feet."

Ray now stood at the front door and puckered his lips out.

"Bye my love."

Leaning down slightly to place a peck on his lips Kai then pressed the key fob to unlock the gleaming black Mercedes parked on their front drive. "Bye loser."

Ray exaggeratingly sighed out.

"Whyy can't you just love me?!" Holding both arms out in question he stood and watched Kai walk to his car. "God, you're so frustrating."

Kai laughed lightly as he got into the car and at a push of a button started up the vehicle.

Pressing a switch on his car door to bring down the passenger side window, he leaned over the gear shift and spoke out loud enough to be heard over the soft purr of the engine.

"What did you say? I'm what?"

"I said you're frustr-"

Kai pressed down on the accelerator a few times with his foot to rev the loud engine over Ray's voice. The powerful roar completely drowning him out and causing a few nosey neighbours to peer through their windows at the unnecessary noise first thing on a morning.

Kai cupped a hand to his ear before shrugging his shoulders, his perfectly white teeth making a rare appearance as his own practical joke amused him.

Taking his foot off the accelerator Kai called out to Ray again as the engine died back down to a soft purr, the smile still dancing on his face.

"Sorry, didn't quite catch that babe. Say that again?"

Ray simply put up his middle finger. He wasn't going to fall for it a second time.

Taking out his sunglasses from the glove compartment Kai put them on before turning to look at Ray again, a smug tone laced his voice as he spoke.

"Oh, and FYI I _do_ love you, more than you'll ever know... Now go get that house cleaned bitch, I'll see you later."

Popping his lips at him to send a kiss, Kai quickly flicked up the switch on the door to put up the car window and sped off the drive to avoid any repercussions of his words. Glancing into his rear view mirror he watched Ray go back into the house, a cheeky smile was still dancing on his lips.

'_Asshole.' _Ray thought to himself with his own smirk as he made his way into the living room.

"Well, I was going to, but now he's said that, if he thinks I'm just going to be spending my entire morning off cleaning he's got another thing coming."

Picking up the landscaping brochure on the glass coffee table Ray flopped onto the couch in protest, resting his feet on the table he flicked through the colourful glossy pages.

'_Ooh that looks nice... Hmm, those flowers are pretty… Oh, a water feature, that'd look good..'  
_  
Ray's exterior design thoughts came to a halt when his phone started to ring. Placing the brochure down on the table he picked up his cell and read the caller ID.

His golden eyes widened, and his mouth gaped open.

~Mariah~

* * *

Dun dun dun.. o_o Ooh what does _she_ want? xD

Thanks for the love so far guys! Makes me smile.

Also just to add I'm in no way affiliated with a company called 'Bathrooms r Us' nor am I aware if that's even a real business. That my friends was just the extent of my imagination (or lack thereof) one evening whilst writing this.

If it is a real company and the owner has just so happened to stumble upon this fic, well, you're welcome for the free advertising. (Also please don't sue me for defamation for saying your bathrooms are expensive AF) xD

I must admit I am soooo excited to put out the next chapter.. It's a juicy one. So yeah. I'd stick around if I were you :P

K~


	3. Thirsty

Chapter 3. Thirsty.

A tuneful knock at the door broke Kai's concentration from his desktop computer.

It was morning, and being an early riser he had already made a good start on his work and had been assessing various spreadsheets for about an hour now.

Glancing over at the clock on the neutral painted walls of his home office a slate brow raised at the realisation it had only just gone 8am.

He didn't think the guy would be starting this early..

_'Keen..'_

With his attention returning to the computer screen Kai continued to quickly type out some data as he called out to Ray who was getting dressed for work in their bedroom adjacent.

"Ray could you get that? Go through all of your ideas with him and I'll be down in a second."

Appearing from the bedroom Ray was fastening the last button on his white polo shirt as he started to make his way down the stairs.

"Alright, hurry up though 'cos you need to negotiate the price, you're better at that stuff than me."

Waiting patiently outside with his hands casually in his pockets, stood a tall slender male with red hair that was mostly hidden underneath a baseball cap he wore backwards.

He wasn't overly built in stature but nowhere near considered lanky either.

Sporting dark beige cargo pants and a fitted khaki green t-shirt, blue eyes took a gander at the black sports car parked on the block-paved drive.

Impressed, he pulled the corners of his mouth down as he admired it.

'_Private reg too. Nice.'_

As the front door opened the redheaded male turned back around and confidently spoke as he held out his hand.

"Mr Hiwatari is it? I'm Tala, here for the back yard?"

With a warm smile, Ray took his hand in his own and shook it.

"Oh no I'm Ray, his partner. Kai will be down in a second. Let me grab that design brochure and we can go through what we've got in mind. Do come in!"

Leaving the door open Ray walked back through the hallway and made his way into the living room where the glossy catalogue was sat on the glass table.

Tala followed him in to the house and closed the front door behind him. Scanning round his new surroundings, he stayed put in the hallway not wanting to intrude.

Standing up from his desk Kai stretched a little before picking up his empty coffee cup and leisurely made his way down the stairs.

Seeing a figure now in his peripheral vision Tala turned his head to his right.

Aqua eyes unnoticeably widened at the male who currently towered over him as he stood on the last step beside him.

'_Damn.. well hello there..'_

Holding out his hand in the same fashion as before Tala questioned, "Mr Hiwatari?"

Taking his hand in his, Kai briefly but firmly shook it.

"Please, just call me Kai."

He had to deal with enough formalities at work; he didn't need to continue them at home.

Not giving the encounter a second thought he stepped down the last step and moved swiftly past the male who was now a few inches taller than him and headed to the kitchen to make himself another coffee.

As he passed him Tala caught the scent of Kai's cologne and his nostrils instantly flared to try savour the fragrance. Thin lips then parted slightly as blue orbs sized up the man that was now stood by the kitchen sink rinsing out his mug.

'_Holyy shi-'_

"-So shall we go outside and we can go over some ideas?"

With a genuine kind smile Ray stood with the brochure held to his chest and ushered Tala to walk towards the French doors that he must have opened whilst his attention was elsewhere.

"Uh y-yeah, sure!"

Rubbing the back of his neck as he was brought back to reality, Tala returned a sheepish smile of his own to the Chinese male and began to follow him, giving one final gawk at Kai in the kitchen before making his way outside.

* * *

x-x-x

Propping the pencil behind his ear Tala flipped the notepad around to show Ray what he had just sketched.

"So like this?"

Amber eyes sparkled with delight as they scanned over the drawings.

"Yes! That's perfect! It's just what we had in mind."

"Awesome." Tala said as he took the pencil again from behind his ear and jotted down more notes.

Everyone always liked his plans first time.

"So I know the pond isn't where you originally wanted to put it, but it would work a lot better towards the far right due to how the land is." He added, gesturing to the area he was referring to with the pencil before flipping through the pages to double check everything over.

"So that's all I need to know really in regards of design.. Materials used will differ depending on how much you want to spend. Do you have a budget in mind?"

He rested the pencil on his bottom lip as he glanced back up at Ray.

"No, there isn't one."

Both Ray and Tala's heads shot towards the familiar assertive voice that had now joined in on the conversation outside.

Holding out his hand, Kai silently requested for the notepad.

Tala immediately obliged and handed it over to him with a faint look of apprehension on his face. Placing the pencil up behind his ear again he tried to look composed and loosely folded his arms across his chest as he waited for approval from, he presumed, the one with all the cash.

He wasn't entirely sure why but the guy made him feel a little unnerved.

Now he was up close it was clear from his demeanour that Mr Hiwatari wasn't someone to mess with, and it was also clear it was he who called all the shots around here.

Tala just really hoped he liked these drawings; he could do with a nice pay cheque.

Taking a sip of his coffee, crimson eyes briefly scanned over the sketches before simply handing the notepad back to Tala.

"We want nothing but the best, so spend whatever is necessary." Kai added coolly.

Ray stayed silent as he bit the inside of his cheek and threw Kai the dirtiest side eye knowing full well it was going to cost a fortune.

Their conversation of 'haggling the price' last night, _clearly _a waste of time.

Kai's poker face expression didn't give the redhead much peace of mind of what his thoughts were on his designs, and though he was a little taken back by his blasé response in regards of budget, he took it as a 'good to go' all the same.

"Well, that's great then. That's all I need for now. I'll go ahead and get things started." He said looking to them both and noticing a clear tension between them.

Taking out his smartphone Tala then started dialling numbers right away to start placing the orders for various materials, throwing a polite smile before distancing himself from the other two.

With his attention now away from them, Ray's facial expression said it all as he turned to face Kai.

"Really?" he said through gritted teeth.

Kai shrugged as he quickly thought.

"He uh, owes me a favour, it'll be cheap, don't worry."

"How can he owe you a favour Kai? You've only just met him." Ray questioned in a low hiss.

"Shhh.."

A low growl then escaped Ray's throat as he pulled away from the index finger that Kai had pressed on to his lips.

If Tala wasn't stood right there he might have just punched that smug smirk off his face.

"I'm leaving for work. Text me the price he says" Ray then ordered in a curt whisper.

Swallowing his pride he then reached up to place a quick kiss on Kai's cheek in an attempt to keep up appearances before calling over to the redhead.

"Good luck dude! I think you're gonna need it!"

With the phone to his ear Tala looked over his shoulder and smiled, covering the mic with his free hand as he called back.

"Don't worry, I like a challenge!"

Baby blues then gave a wink before turning his back again to continue the phone call.

Ray then headed back inside the house with Kai following just behind him.

"Make sure you ask him every so often if he wants a cup of tea or anything." Ray bit as he grabbed his denim jacket off one of the wooden coat hooks in the hallway.

Kai leaned against the wooden door frame, leisurely folded his arms and cocked a brow at his boyfriend's, in his mind, ridiculous request.

"He's here to work Ray, not drink tea."

Hospitality had never been one of his strong points.

Putting on his jacket Ray looked at him with a bored expression.

"For once in your life Kai will you just do as you're told? You're meant to do things like that when people are doing work for you. It's courteous."

Picking up his house keys off one of the metal hooks in the hallway he then muttered under his breath.

"What's also courteous is to discuss budgets with your boyfriend, but it's _fine_ don't worry about it."

Ruby eyes rolled.

"Have a good day at work babe."

"Make him tea."

"I'll make him tea."

He was so not going to make him tea.

Ray, clearly still annoyed but not wanting to start a domestic when they had company, begrudgingly placed a quick kiss on Kai's lips before walking out the front door.

Kai, completely unfazed by the entire situation, went back upstairs to his office.

* * *

x-x-x

Conveniently Kai's home office window faced out onto the back yard.

Every so often he would stand from his desk and walk over to it to check up on Tala. Not to ensure his wellbeing or anything but to simply see if he was doing his damn job… and… if he was _completely_ honest with himself – the guy was sorta good to look at too.

It was around 12:45 now and the sun was at its highest.

Standing from his desk once more Kai stretched out his arms and wandered over to the window. It wasn't long before he could feel the sun's warm rays on his face through the glass. It had turned quite pleasant outside.

Well, pleasant for most.

Earlier on in the morning whilst it was still somewhat cool out, to break up his work day he'd intended on venturing out for a run so had changed into some gym attire after Ray had left.

Seeing the blistering sunshine he was now having second thoughts. He hated getting overly sweaty.

Peering down at the redhead who was currently digging up part of the yard he could see his khaki green shirt now donned darkened patches on the back.

He _had_ been at it for a few hours now without a drink..

'S_uppose if he passes out he can't work..'_

Heading downstairs and straight to the kitchen, Kai took out a glass from the cupboard and filled it up with water from the fridge's built in drinks dispenser. He then made his way outside through the French doors, casually walked over towards Tala and held out the cool glass towards him.

"Thirsty?"

Tala's attention snapped towards the voice having just been with the sound of birds and his own thoughts all morning.

'_Only for you..'_

"Ah, cheers."

He secured the spade upright in the dirt before taking off one of his garden gloves and accepted the glass, taking a few sips and then progressing to gulping the entire contents down like it was the first drink he'd ever had.

With a sigh of relief he wiped the his mouth with the back of his hand. He didn't realise how parched he was.

Now being able to have a closer look at the yard, Kai gazed around at the progress that'd been made.

He'd had made a fairly good start in the few hours he'd been here. It was clear that he was a hard worker.

An admirable trait, he thought.

Having being used to being around complete slackers most of the time Kai was quite pleased. If he kept up this pace he'd have it all finished in a matter of days.

With the warm fresh air circling his lungs now that he was out of his stuffy office, he was reluctant to go back inside to work.

He really did enjoy the outdoors, and like Ray he was really looking forward for the space to be completed. Somewhere for him to just _go, _and be with his own thoughts.

He wasn't usually one to procrastinate but he just kinda wanted to stall a little.

He'd always hated small talk. It was clear things were going fine out here - he had eyes.

But, he really couldn't be arsed sitting back at that computer.

Ray _did_ tell him to be polite, and whilst he had work to do he just wanted to make Ray happy. He wasn't just using Tala to get out of doing those spreadsheets, noo not at all, he was just being '_courteous'_ like Ray wanted him to.

_God_ he was such a good boyfriend.

"Soo, how's it all going?"

With a cheeky grin Tala stood with his gloved hand rested on top of the spades handle and the empty glass in the other as he looked out at the large yard.

"Well.. I know I said I liked a challenge but.. " He laughed lightly, his eyes now on Kai. "Nah it's fine really, there's no major issues to be honest just a few little obstacles to get over but we'll get there."

Yeahhhh he couldn't do this.

Kai was over with the small talk. He'd rather just go out and sweat.

Returning the smile with a faint one of his own Kai held out his hand for Tala to give him the empty glass to take back inside.

"Well I'm going to be heading out for a little bit. You'll be fine here on your own right?"

Handing the glass over to him and eyeing Kai's workout attire Tala presumed he'd be going to the gym or something.

Nice imagery.

"Yeah yeah, I'll be fine. Just need to finish off the digging for the pond, and then I'll be moving on to the stone placement in the corner. I'll probably wrap it up for today after I've finished that."

Kai gave a nod.

"Alright, well I'll more than likely be back before you leave so… I'll let you carry on."

Turning on his heel Kai began to make his way back to the house before Tala's voice caused him to pause and look back over his shoulder.

"Hey Kai, uh, before you go… Would I be able to get your number just in case I need to get in contact with you? I only have your assistants at the moment."

Walking over towards him he fished out his smartphone and held out to him.

Forever the cynic, Kai glanced down at the phone in front of him before looking back up at blue eyes.

"Why would you need to get in contact with me?" He flatly asked.

Tala stuttered and racked his brain for a response. He'd never met anyone so abrupt before.

"W-well uhm, I probably won't? But y'know just incase there's an emergency or something.. it'd make the process a lot quicker being able to get straight in contact with you rather than going through your assistant…"  
_  
'Fuck me, he's hard work.'_  
_  
_Crimson eyes narrowed at the poor excuse but it did sort of make sense to skip the middle man in this instance; Tala was on his property after all. But he was literally only going to be an hour at most. He really didn't think it was necessary but..

"Hn, I guess that's fine. I _really_ won't be that long though."

Reluctantly he took the phone, typed in his number and handed it back to Tala. Regretting it almost immediately after he did.

"Cheers. Probably won't ever need it like you say but you know... Better to be safe than sorry right?" He said with wink before returning the phone into the back pocket of his cargo pants.

"Well, I'll see you in a bit, have fun. Oh and thanks again for the drink."

Putting his glove back on as he confidently spoke Tala smiled again before pulling the spade out of the mud to continue digging.

Giving a small nod in response Kai walked back in to the house feeling somewhat vulnerable. He hated giving out his personal contact number. It was just so, _personal. _

After the work was done though he was sure he'd just delete it… Isn't like he'd need it afterwards, right?

Placing the glass down on the marble kitchen counter, he grabbed his water bottle and filled it up from the fridge dispenser. Popping his headphones in his ears he made his way out of the front door and started his run.

* * *

x-x-x

Upon hearing a giggle, Kai looked up from his paperback book to see a ridiculous grin dancing on Ray's face.

He was currently sat at the opposite end of their large couch to him with his mobile phone in hand.

It was around 9pm now and Ray had gotten home from work just over an hour ago. Tala had left around four-ish and said it would be about the same time of 8am to start tomorrow.

Curiosity very rarely got the better of him, but with a frown he couldn't help but pry.

"Who're you talking to?"

With his thumbs tapping away on the phone screen Ray didn't so much as glance at the Russian as he excitedly responded.

"Oh, it's Mariah! The white tigers are in town at the moment. We're probably going to organise a catch up at some point soon. It's been _so_ long since I last saw them!"

It was completely missed but Kai's eyes rolled in response, his focus returning to his book.

Just hearing Mariah's name made him feel a type of way.

Sure what her and Ray had ended a while ago but what was stopping them from ever rekindling? That stupid smile plastered on his face suggested he was having a whale of a time talking to her.

'_Silly tart.'_

Placing his phone down on the glass coffee table in front of him Ray happily sighed before walking over to the doors and peering out into the yard.

"Looks good out there so far doesn't it? He's doing a great job. Did he say when he'd be finished?"

_~bleep~_

Having received another text message he instantly spun around and picked his phone back up from the table.

Kai's focus remained down on his book.

"End of this week probably. Shouldn't take too long the rate he's going." He replied in a monotone voice knowing full well Ray's attention was back on the text thread.

A few minutes later Ray lowered his phone from his gaze and glanced over at Kai on the couch.

"Babe? Did he say when he'd be finished?"

Kai's eye twitched. He couldn't _stand_ repeating himself.

"I answered you."

With the Russian only getting silence to his crisp toned response he peeked up from his book to see Ray back enthralled with his phone, tapping away some more at the screen.

Kai glared at him. He was going to smash that thing in a minute.

Ray then chirpily spoke.

"Sorry babe I didn't hear you, what did you say?"

"Well _maybe_ if you put down your ph-"

A polyphonic ringtone then filled the room blaring over Kai's heated response.

Ray answered it immediately before bouncing out of the living room like a secretive teenage girl.

"Hey you! What's up?"

"-..Phone."

Shaking his head Kai carelessly chucked his book onto the glass table in front of him.

Leaning forward, his elbows on his knees, he ran both hands through his slate coloured hair as he took in a deep breath and sighed.

'_At least we have the weekend together I guess. Roll on Saturday.'_

* * *

Oh Raymond. Sweet.. sweet oblivious boy. xD

Thank you for the reviews guys! Ch 4 will be up in a couple of weeks. Hopefully see you there!

K~


	4. Wandering Eyes

Chapter 4. Wandering eyes.

"I told you I was going out on Saturday didn't I? With the white tigers? Shit.. I-I'm sorry Kai, I really thought I'd told you.."

Kneeling down to tie his shoe laces, Ray hesitantly stared up awaiting the Russian's reaction who was currently stood facing the stove making dinner.

"I don't know why, but I figured it'd be Sunday that we were going to do something not Saturday.. it's just, I've not seen them all for a while, an-and we were all free tonight so I-"

"-Don't worry about it, have fun." Kai bluntly cut him off.

Refusing to look down at him, he continued to stir the Thai curry in the large pan he'd spent close to an hour preparing for the two of them. A blank stare sat on his face with clear tension in his jaw as he clenched his teeth together, mentally struggling to hold back the venom that sat on the tip of his tongue.

'_You've not seen me properly for a fucking while either Ray but fuck me right?' _

Rising to his feet Ray timidly hugged him from the side and rested his chin on one of Kai's broad shoulders. Even though Kai wasn't looking at him he gave his best puppy dog eyes and pouted his lips slightly, speaking cutesy to try and defuse the situation that was developing in the kitchen.

"Kai don't be like that.. Pleasee.. Don't be mad at me."

Kai tried to sound as convincing as he could as he next spoke. He really didn't want to start yet another argument with Ray but he wasn't going to completely hide the fact he was majorly pissed off right now.

"I'm not being like anything Ray. I'm fine. I'll just plate this up for you.. Besides it'll be nice having a night in to myself anyway."

'_Like every __**fucking**__ night.'_

Releasing Kai from his hold, Ray smiled at his beau's efforts to seem unbothered.

There was a clear bite to his tone so he knew he was annoyed, but to save an argument he played dumb and pretended to not notice his blatantly obvious frustration with him. He wanted to see his old team from back home!

"We'll _definitely_ do something tomorrow babe." He said, reassuringly stroking Kai's back with a smile. "It'll be my treat. It's not like I'll be hungover or anything, it's not going to be a late one. Just a few drinks, that's all."

Having lost interest entirely in both Ray and the conversation, Kai spoke out candidly as he stared into the large pan.

Letting his dark crimson eyes blur over as he stirred the food round with a wooden spoon.

"Sure, whatever. Tell Mariah I said hi."

The hand that was stroking his back suddenly became limp as Ray now looked at his lover unimpressed.

He just had to didn't he. Just couldn't help himself.

"Stop it Kai. You know that ended _years_ ago. She's _just_ a friend." He lightly scolded, not even remotely entertaining Kai's petty comments.

"Mhm." Was the uninterested response.

A ringtone then emitted from Ray's front pocket of his black jeans.

"This'll be Lee probably." He said more to himself as he eased the mobile phone out.

Looking at the screen, his guess was correct and he quickly kissed Kai's cheek before answering it and making his way towards the front door.

"I love you, I'll see you later okay? – Heyy… yeah yeah I'm on my way now bro I'll see you soon, I'll be about fifteen minutes."

As Ray closed the front door behind him, the sound of his voice slowly faded to nothing as he walked further from the house and Kai was left with silence.

The only sound was the slow simmer of bubbling food in the kitchen.

He continued to vacantly stir for a few more minutes before turning off the gas. Blinking a few times to regain the focus in his eyes he took in a slow and controlled deep breath before violently launching the wooden spoon across the kitchen making it clatter into the sink.

"WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?! THAT SELFISH. SON OF A. BITCH!"

Turning from the stove Kai stormed over to the drinks cabinet and flung open the door.

Having completely lost his appetite in his rage, he glared inside and snatched a tall bottle of whiskey.

Pouring himself a shots worth in a glass tumbler he downed the drink before pouring himself another immediately after.

Picking up both the bottle and the glass he began to storm his way out of the kitchen before giving a final snarl at the pan of food on the stove.

'_What a waste of __**fucking**__ time that was.'_

Skulking into the living room Kai firmly placed the glass tumbler and whiskey bottle down onto the glass coffee table causing the tawny coloured liquid to shake before sinking himself down into the couch.

Taking in a deep breath and exhaling a frustrated growl he held his head in his hands as he mentally ranted to himself.

'_What is even the point in this relationship? The whole thing is a joke. We barely see each other. We barely even talk... might as well just be single..'_

_~Bleep~_

Kai lifted up his head as his attention shifted up to his smartphone that had been left on top of the mantelpiece.

Huffing like it was a chore, he stood up from the couch and picked it up to read the notification on the screen._  
_  
[T: Evening Kai, just to say the money has come through okay, thanks again. Hope u both like it all. And if u ever need any more work doing in the future just let me know!]

[K: Great. Will do. Thanks.]

Responding back to Tala's text without much thought Kai tossed the phone onto the couch watching it bounce once before sitting himself back down.

Running his fingers through his slate coloured hair he lifted up his drink and took a few sips as he continued to stew. The liquid giving a slight burn as it travelled down his throat.

'_I was fine before. Absolutely fine. If anything, I preferred it. Could do what I want, when I wan-'_

_~Bleep~_

With the text tone breaking up his thoughts once more he glanced down to his left at the phone again puzzled.

Leaning over to reach for it he picked it back up and gazed down at the illuminated screen.

[T: U up to much this evening?]

He scowled at his phone.

'_Uh? Is he bored or something?'_

[K: Not really - you?]

He sat a little awkwardly holding his phone as he waited for a reply. He didn't really understand why they were still talking.

The work was done... That was it surely?

[T: Nah, just chillin' at home]

Attached to the text message was a photo of an opened glass beer bottle on a wooden coffee table, presumably in Tala's living room.

Kai cocked a brow.

Okayy?_  
_  
He wasn't exactly sure what to say to that but reciprocated in taking a photo of his own alcoholic beverage that was now back on the table in front of him and attached it to his response.

[K: Join the club.]

A mere several seconds later his phone beeped again.

[T: Wow, shit day? LOL u have a brand new back yard, what do u have to be miserable about? Where's Ray?]

[K: Out.]

Was his simple response. Just reading his name annoyed him. Why bring him up?

Upon reading the reply a dark smile now sat upon Tala's lips at the thought of Kai being home alone.

Staring down at his screen he pondered for a few minutes on how to respond.

Did he dare?

He shrugged, the smirk on his face becoming more prominent as he thumbs tapped away on the keyboard.

Fuck it, the beer in his system figured it was a good idea. He could always brush it off as a joke if need be.  
_  
_[T: Ah, that's a shame.. Well, I could pop over if you'd like, y'know just to double check that everything's in good working order outside? ;) ]

Kai cocked a brow as he processed the message. That little winking emoji giving it a whole new meaning.

A small smirk tried to tug at his lips.

Was he for real right now?

[K: I'm going to hazard a guess you're bored and home alone too?]

[T: Oh nah she's in the kitchen makin' dinner :P ]

[K: Wow.]

As the evening went on the two males continued to leisurely text back and forth, mainly due to Kai's boredom at first.

But with his inhibitions lowering due to the whiskey he was slowly making his way through, and Tala being on his 6th beer, though Kai would never admit it, he was actually enjoying the distraction.

Surprisingly to him the two had quite a bit in common.

They both spoke Russian for starters.

Kai had noticed a slight accent when Tala first introduced himself at the bottom of his stairs, though he couldn't really place it with his English being so good.

Whilst texting they'd exchange the odd word in Russian but they spoke predominately in English for ease.

They both liked the outdoors.

Obviously with Tala's occupation, come rain or shine he was pretty much always outside with his work. And Kai enjoyed the peacefulness of nature and would often take himself for long walks in the nearby park not far from his and Ray's home.

They liked to look well groomed, enjoyed keeping fit and leading a, _somewhat_, healthy lifestyle.

They both drank and Tala would have the occasional social smoke, but they both frequented the gym often and cared about their appearance which was clear from their aesthetic.

Both were blatant workaholics, though unlike Kai, Tala made a point of having that Saturday night blow out in the club every so often.

[T: We should go out some time I bet ur hilarious drunk]

[K: What makes you think that? ]

[T: Well ur all uptight in ur suit and tie all day playing big boss man so I bet u go wild when u finally let ur hair down]

[K: Lol. Guess you'll never know.]

Tala wasn't that far from the truth. There'd been many a time in his younger years when Kai had had to be picked up from some bar because he'd gotten himself absolutely trashed.

When the news broke to Kai that he would have to take over Hiwatari Enterprises after his grandfather was incarcerated, his drinking skyrocketed.

He wanted to choose his own path, make his own life choices. He wanted to have the freedom to screw up every now and then and it not be a big deal. He had just turned 18. And the amount of pressure he was under was ridiculous.

He rebelled. Hard.

Alcohol on the daily. Drug use. Promiscuity.

His old team had no idea on the extent of how he was living his life for that period of time but they could tell that their ex-captain wasn't okay.

They weren't massively close after they all went their separate ways after the championships but even from a distance it was obvious.

Whenever they did all meet to catch up Kai's usually punctual self would be late. And when he did finally arrive he often looked dishevelled and withdrawn.

It wasn't until Ray saw Kai's photos in a magazine one day, lips locked with some random page 3 girl in a club and a questionable white substance under his nostrils that he took it upon himself to intervene.

He began checking in daily on him. Whether it was a visit to his apartment after work, a morning phone call or a goodnight text.

As time went on naturally the two grew very close.

Kai eventually accepted his responsibilities as the company's CEO and like a duck to water settled right in and things were back to running smoothly.

Ray's emotional support helped him cut back down on his drinking, quit the drugs entirely, and find other methods like meditation to relieve his stress.

Kai was so grateful for Ray's friendship that he used his new found connections to his advantage and pulled a few strings landing Ray his dream job at the best restaurant in the city.

As a thank you Ray came over one night to cook the two of them dinner.

After a few glasses of wine, one thing eventually led to another and as they say the rest is history.

[T: What time is Ray back?]

[K: Don't know. Nor do I really care.]

[T: Ooh it's like that? Shit. I didn't think u'd fallen out. What happened?]

Kai paused for a moment almost instantly sobering up.

Why Tala kept bringing Ray up he couldn't quite work out but he knew he shouldn't have given it away that the two of them weren't okay.

That was _their_ business. And as mad as he currently was at the neko-jin, he wasn't going to put out his dirty laundry like that.

Especially not to some guy who was blatantly trying to flirt with him.

[K: Nothing. Be fine by tomorrow I'm sure.]

[T: Well hey if it isn't drop me a msg ;) I'll gladly be ur rebound]

Kai pressed his lips together to suppress another smile at his boldness.

The guy was relentless.

[K: I'm good thanks. Pretty sure I could do a lot better than a scrawny redhead.]

Tala choked on some of his beer. His mouth then gaping open at the insulting text.

'_Scrawny?! I'll show you scrawny you entitled little prick.'_

After waiting a few minutes for the comeback, Kai eagerly opened up the text that had just come through to his phone.

His cheeks immediately adopted a light blush and his ruby eyes couldn't help but widen as he gawked at what had just appeared on his screen.

Wow..

Attached to the message was an image; a black and white body shot taken in a slim, full-length mirror.

Tala was completely topless with, Kai hazarded a guess at, grey-coloured baggy sweat pants on.

A cocky smirk was plastered on his face.

Obviously.

He was holding his phone up in his right hand, with his left resting on the waist band of his bottoms, intentionally pulling them down slightly to show off his deep v-lines.

Scrawny redhead wasn't scrawny by any means. Tala was actually lean as fuck.

He wasn't as bulked up as he was. But still, Kai was somewhat impressed.

And Kai was _never_ impressed.

[T: This redhead would fuck ur brains out sweetheart.. That offers still there y'know for me to come round and check on everything? I know u like what u see.]

After reading the attached text Kai frustratingly couldn't resist clicking back on the thirst trap.

Who knew all that was hiding under that khaki green shirt?

Tala was right. He did like what he saw. He looked hot as hell. But boy didn't he know it.

Arrogance was never a turn on for Kai usually. But the straight audacity of this guy had him strangely curious.

Never being one to kiss ass though, he completely disregarded the photo like he'd never even received it and queried the fellow Russian with his usual witty dry humour.

[K: Do you give all your clients this same aftercare?]

[T: Lol, nah I don't to be honest, just u Mr Hiwatari]

[K: Yeah? Why's that?]

[T: Not sure. U must be special. Also - ur sexy as fuck.]

Humoured by his bluntness Kai smiled as his palm now rested on his forehead.

How was this even happening right now?

Lowering his hand down to his cheek he took a glance at the silver clock on the living room wall.

12:40am

Sighing through his nose he lowered his hand down completely from his face as he felt himself getting wound up again.

'_Oh it won't be a late one. Just a few drinks that's all.' _Kai mocked Ray's words in his head.

Pouring himself more whiskey Kai lifted up the glass and took a few sips. Staring at nothing in particular as he rested the tumbler against his lips, thoughts played out in his mind of what Ray could be doing right now.

To his recollection he'd never really spoken to any of the white tiger's.

Maybe talked some smack in the beydish several years ago but other than that he couldn't place a time when he'd had any major interaction with any them. They were Ray's friends and that was that, he didn't need to make any sort of effort with them.

He imagined Ray would be sat talking to Lee mostly.

He was like the brother he'd never had, he'd told him before.

The tall one, Gary, he'd be sat opposite and that little one, whatever his name was... was he even old enough to drink? Who knows. But Kai guessed they'd just be sat talking shit, reminiscing about whatever. Boys being boys and doing nothing wrong.

But _she_ would be there too of course_. _

Kai pulled a look of disgust as he tried to rid the colour pink from his mind and what the little tramp would be doing.

She'd be sat next to Ray he knew that. Cracking stupid jokes that wouldn't even be remotely funny.

She'd probably touch him every time he made her laugh and try give him those eyes that all girls knew how to give.

She'd probably be drinking some fruity little drink and pretending she's more drunk than what she is just for the attention.

Maybe the others had gone home long ago and it was just her and Ray right now...

Having not received a response, Tala took it upon himself to send another provoking text message.

Kai jumped slightly as the phone beeped in his hand, his overthinking ceasing immediately with the new found distraction.

[T: I couldn't help but notice that you kept checking me out from that window upstairs.. You obviously liked what you saw then too?]

'_Oh shit... he noticed?'_

[K: Please, I was just making sure you were doing what you were being paid to do.]

Nice save. He was only half lying in that message.

[T: LOL are u always this hard to get?]

Kai flashed some teeth as Tala's mission now became clear as day, instantly forgetting the time and the reason for his irritation moments ago.

[K: I'm one of a kind 'sweetheart'. Not everyone gets to have me. Unlike _some_ who'd just fuck anything with a pulse.]

Tala snickered at Kai's accusation.

[T: U make me sound like a complete sex pest. I'm usually not like this I swear 0:) ]

Kai couldn't help but shake his head at the little angel emoji sat at the end of the text message.

There was no way this guy could even be remotely considered an angel.

[K: Could've fooled me.]

[T: Honestly I'm really not! I mean sure I like sex but I'm no fiend. U just caught my eye that's all.. I don't know. There's just something about u Kai.. U interest me]

Kai re-read that last message a few times as it seemed to be the most genuine thing he'd said to him all night.

No banter, no bullshit… just straightforward.

Intrigued, he tapped away on his phone's keyboard.

[K: So you don't usually have wandering eyes then when you're in a relationship?]

[T: No. Never.]

It was strange but for some reason, perhaps the alcohol clouding his judgement, Kai actually believed his words.

It wasn't the response that he was expecting because Tala's confidence really suggested otherwise. He genuinely would have had him down as a complete nympho.

He studied that last text for a bit longer before lowering his phone down to his lap. He was at a lost as to what to respond to him with now.

After several minutes his phone vibrated again in his hand.

[T: Can I see u again sometime?]

[K: I don't think that would be appropriate Tala do you?]

[T: Why not?]

[K: Oh I don't know. The fact we're both in a relationship?]

[T: What, 2 friends can't meet for a drink?]

'_Wouldn't be just as friends though would it?' _Kai mentally snapped back at Tala's failed attempt of innocence.

[K: I'll think about it. Anyways I'm going to bed.]

[T: Let me know. Sweet dreams boss man]

Kai chucked his phone away from him on the couch with a sigh of relief to finally have that thing out of his hands.

Staring up at the ceiling he was both mentally drained and completely dumbfounded at what had even just happened the past few hours.

He was kind of tipsy but completely aware of everything he'd said and everything Tala had sent back.

Truth be told he wasn't going to think about shit.

Meet up with him? Why an earth would he do that? That was just asking for trouble.

It was _just_ conversation.

Killed a few hours.

Kept him entertained.

That's all Tala was. Entertainment.

Yep.

Standing up from the couch Kai downed the remaining shot of whiskey in his glass, picked up the bottle and headed back into the kitchen.

Putting the bottle back in to the cabinet his attention was brought back to the pan of Thai curry that was still sat on the stove, long gone cold by now.

With the alcohol sitting deep in his system exacerbating his emotions, Kai's earlier anger of the current situation had now transitioned to upset and guilt as he stood alone in the kitchen.

He felt pretty shitty truth be told. Some random guy had made him feel somewhat wanted this evening. Desired in fact... and he'd be lying if he said he hadn't liked it.

Were him and Ray really that bad? The whole situation just felt pretty hopeless right about now.

It had gone past 1:15am now, and there was still no sign of Ray.

Walking back out the kitchen crimson eyes held a glossy finish as he took himself upstairs and went to bed.

* * *

x-x-x

Several days had passed now and like ships in the night with busy work schedules both Kai and Ray hadn't really seen or spoken to each other.

Ray ended up waltzing in that night he was out with the white tiger team at 3am. Blind drunk.

The following day was spent with him feeling immensely sorry for himself along with countless apologies to Kai who pretty much just stayed in his office doing some overtime most of the day.

He couldn't be bothered arguing.

It wasn't the staying out late that Ray felt bad about and was apologising for.

Hell. Kai had strolled in at 7am before now.

The reason he felt bad was for allowing himself to get so drunk to the point that just opening his eyes the next morning was a chore.

He'd _promised_ Kai they would do something the next day, and it was safe to say they never did.

He couldn't deny that he'd had a good time though.

It was great seeing his old team again and finally let his hair down.

Not literally.

The amount of fan girls that would maul him in the bar to try and touch his luscious locks doesn't bare thinking about.

But the past few days had been pretty awkward. When the two were actually both home together.

They either had their faces in a book, a computer, or their phones.

Whilst Kai felt completely at ease with the peace and quiet, Ray would often find any excuse to break the silence.

"Tyson's just invited us to a meet up on the 15th." Ray announced as he clicked on the facebook event notification.

Kai looked up at Ray briefly before looking back down at his book.

"Hn.. Pretty sure I'm free.. Is it a Saturday?"

"Yeah.. Fairly sure I'm working though.." Ray spoke low, pretty much to himself as he stood to go and check his schedule on the kitchen calendar.

He mentally prayed he was off. He really could do with a cheering up with the guys right about now.

"Aw man.."

Shuffling back into the living room, Ray slumped himself back down into his spot on the couch with a huff.

"You're working?" Kai asked indifferently, still staring down at his book.

"Yeah.. The mayor has a reservation that weekend so I wouldn't even be able to swap the shift.. Fucks sake."

"They'll be another meet up Ray. It isn't that big of a deal."

Ray glowered over at him. Kai's attempts of consoling the Chinese male always did tend to fall a little short.

Pressing on the "Not going" button on the event caused the old World Champion to pop up on Ray's phone a few minutes later.

[T: Dude! :( Why?!]

[R: Workin' bro, sorry :( ]

[T: Aw man! U cant get it off?]

[R: Afraid not. Got a VIP coming in. Everyone needs to work that weekend. We can't pick another date?]

[T: =No, Max already booked his flight, that's literally the only date we can do :'( ]

Ray's mood lowered even more if that was possible. He would have loved to have seen that little blondie.

Since leaving the team Max spent most of his time over in the states now working with his mother at the research centre. Whenever he did come to visit they were short and sweet and the next time he visited after this time probably wouldn't be until the Christmas period.

[R: = Gonna have to sit this one out then :/ Sorry.]

[T: =Isn't ur fault dude. Hopefully catch u soon tho. D'you know if Kai is free to come?]

Ray lazily tilted his head as he looked over at Kai.

"Tyson's asking if you're gonna go."

Kai shrugged and plainly replied.

"Maybe. Don't know. Could probably think of a million other things I'd rather do on a Saturday night than go out with the brat pack to be honest."

Ray's blood instantly began to boil.

He would've given his left arm to meet up with the bladebreakers and this guy here couldn't have cared any less.

Considering all that they'd been through, especially the occurrences over the past few years in helping Kai deal with his mini life crisis, how could he _still _not think much of them? It literally blew his mind.

"Why are you such a fucking dick?" Ray suddenly spat.

Kai's eyes shot up from the paperback bewildered at the outburst.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You're actually a first class asshole Kai. These guys are meant to be your friends, have been for over 10 years now and you're still keeping up this cold act? Grow the fuck up seriously! Are you going to go or not?"

Ray's usually soft amber eyes held a narrow slit.

He was seething Kai could tell. What the hell his problem was though he didn't know. He also didn't know who Ray actually thought he was talking to right now.

Whilst he was taken back, on the surface he seemed to remain unfazed and simply retorted back in his usual cool fashion but with a deadly undertone.

"… I'll think about it."

Ray growled before standing up from the sofa.

"Whatever, tell him your fucking self then." He bit as he flung his cell phone at the space right next to Kai.

Kai didn't flinch as the phone hit the seat beside him and just side-eyed the neko-jin as he stormed out of the living room.

'_.. the actual fuck was that about..'_

Picking up Ray's phone Kai read the final message Tyson had sent asking if he'd be joining them.

Of course he was going. It was just a joke. Sheesh.

He'd always sported the cold attitude, but deep down everyone knew he cared.

Since when did Ray get so touchy?

Kai had his thumb hovering over the keyboard about to respond to Tyson when the phone buzzed in his hand and a new notification appeared at the top of the screen.

Without really thinking he clicked on to it and a whole new text thread took over.

He was greeted to a long back and forth between Ray and Mariah.

Kai pressed his lips together into a thin line as his whole body tensed up. Immediately he began to scroll up and scan the messages.

He didn't even care that he was invading his boyfriend's privacy right now.

What the fuck did she want and why were they talking so much?

[M: OMG it was so good to see you today babe! xox]

[R: Yeah! The team all back together again!]

[M: We definitely shouldn't leave it so long next time! I've missed you so much! You're looking really great Ray xox]

[R: Haha thanks Riah, you're looking really well too. We need another outing before you guys head back to China!]

Kai sneered at the screen.

His heart rate had increased tenfold as a jealous rage swirled through his veins. His teeth held clenched as he tried to refrain from crushing the very device in his clammy hands. She was blatantly flirting with him, could he not see that?

'_Who the fuck is she calling babe?.. and Riah? Really?'_

He continued to scroll down reading their conversation from the other night.

[M: You should come back with us! The elders would love to see you again! xox]

[R: Aw there's no way I could get the time off work love. I could try asking but can't see it getting granted]

[M: Ask! Won't hurt to ask babe! It'd be amazing! We can sit next to each other on the plane just like old times xox]

Completely unaware of the volcano that was bubbling away downstairs, Ray was laid on their bed with both of his hands cupped behind his head. A million thoughts raced through his mind as he vacantly stared up at the ceiling.

'_I can't keep going on like this.. he's never going to change.. after all this time we're still doing the same shit.'_

He thought back to Mariah's proposal about going back to China for a little bit. A change of scenery and some time apart would maybe do him and Kai some good?

Though, they never spent time together anyway so that'd probably make things even worse.. could it even get any worse?

Having read enough Kai scrolled all the way to the bottom of the text thread to see the latest message Mariah had just sent several minutes ago.

[M: Ray! Look at this cute little necklace Lee just bought me! xox ]

Kai's jaw locked as darkened crimson eyes held their piercing gaze on the attached photo.

His breathing becoming more erratic as a red mist began to wash over his vision.

Ray's screen was filled with, yes some tacky little cat chain, but predominately, Mariah's well-endowed cleavage.

She was really going to play this game? Kai's lips contorted into a twisted smile that was shortly followed by a laugh but Kai was anything but amused right now.

He was done.

He was _so_ done.

With nothing but adrenaline coursing through him he sprung up from the sofa, stomped up the stairs and swung open the bedroom door so fast it caused the handle to smack into the wall cracking the paintwork.

Ray almost jumped out of his skin at the sudden entry and his head shot towards the door, wide amber eyes met garnet slits.

"So '_just friends'_ send each other pictures of their tits do they?" Kai venomously spat.

Instantly sitting himself up on the bed a look of concern now washed over Ray's clearly flustered face, "W-What are you talking about?"

Kai carelessly flung Ray's phone on the bed in front of him causing him to crawl a little towards it to reach for it.

With a frown Ray looked at the photo in question and his mouth parted slightly as he now understood the cause of Kai's outburst.

"Babe, i-it isn't what you think!" Ray blurted out. "It's not what it looks like"

Though he knew exactly what it looked like, and what it really was.

A pang of guilt shot through Ray's stomach as he sat on his knees speechless.

He tried to act oblivious but he was completely aware of what Mariah was and had been doing since she got over here.

She had been all over him like a rash when they met up last weekend but he'd just dismissed it as Mariah simply being Mariah.

That's just what she was like, she'd always been a flirt and a bit touchy feely. That was partly why they broke up in the first place.

Though it was a part of why they got together in the first place too.

Ray loved her playfulness. Her positivity. The way she could make light of any serious situation. But, that was done now. He wasn't interested. He was with her long enough to know what she was like and what she was trying to pull here but he _wasn't_ interested.

He'd just been brushing her off, right? Had it not come across like that in the messages that he knew Kai would've now seen?

Kai didn't bothering sticking around for any sort of explanation.

Turning on his heel he cleared out of the bedroom just as fast as he'd entered and bounded back down the stairs.

"Kai!"

Ray cried out as he quickly scrambled off of the bed to go after him but upon hearing the front door slam shut as he'd just reached the top of the stairs he knew he wouldn't be able to catch up with the Russian now.

A low whine escaped Ray's throat as he headed back in to the bedroom and grabbed his phone that had been left on top of the now ruffled sheets.

Opening up his call list he pressed on Kai's name and held it up to his ear.

He could feel the harsh beating of his heart thumping away in his chest as the dial tone continuously rang for a minute before going to an automatic voicemail message.

With a growl he ended the call and opened up his messages to quickly type out a text.

[R: Stop ignoring me Kai. Answer the phone.]

Sitting himself down on the edge of their bed, he rested his elbows on his thighs as he clutched on to the device with both hands, willing for it to show Kai's caller ID.

With seconds feeling like hours he caved and tried to call him again.

Kai just kept walking. His fists were clenched and his whole chest felt tight as the adrenaline slowly began to wear off.

His mind was racing.

'_How long has this been going on for? Did it even ever stop? How could I have been so stupid?!'_

He had no idea where he was going he was just walking.

His phone was going crazy in his back pocket but he didn't care. He had nothing to say to Ray right now.

Getting the voicemail message once more Ray ended the call.

Golden eyes slowly began to well up as he hopelessly gazed down at the empty screen. Rubbing them with the back of his hand to clear the forming tears he then timidly typed with his thumbs.

[R: Kai come home, this is stupid. You're blowing this completely out of proportion. I've not done anything! Please pick up. Talk to me]

With the constant buzzing beginning to grate on his last nerve, Kai stopped in his tracks to ease the annoying device out of his pocket.

[K: =The only thing that's stupid Ray is me for actually believing you about "Riah"]

Kai then swiped off of the text thread and opened up his facebook app. Clicking on to the event that Tyson had sent them both earlier that afternoon, he firmly pressed on the "Going" button.

Acting completely on impulse and spite now, Kai then clicked back onto his text messages and opened up a different text thread.

[K: I'll be at 'Toppers' on the 15th from 8pm. Do with that info whatever you want.]

A mere 10 seconds passed before a response came through.

[T: =I'll see u there Mr Hiwatari..]

* * *

A/N: Well that was a long one.

Anyone else just _hate_ text speak? I wanted it to be as authentic as poss so had to go through and edit all the "you"'s to "u" and I died a little each time. I couldn't bring myself to to change any "to/too" to "2" that was just too much for me xD

I also felt that Kai wouldn't use any abbreviations just with him being so used to using "proper english" at work.. And Ray neither because he's a clever little cookie. But yeah. Hope y'all liked it regardless!

Also many thanks to those that took the time to review the last chapter! You all make my day honestly.

Hopefully see you on the next one where we go to "Toppers" Club! Pahaa. Spinning tops.. AJ Topper.. Kai being a top?.. geddit? xD

Someone stop me..

K~


	5. Dirty

_"Wish I'd met you at another place in time, if only, if only you were mine, this love story ends for you and I, cos I'm already someone else's..'' - _'Baby' by Clean Bandit.

A/N: I know y'all ain't ready for this.. but I'ma give it to you anyway.

THEE longest chapter to date so I hope you have snacks.

As always, thank you so much for those that have fave'd and reviewed.

Enjoy.

K~

* * *

Chapter 5. Dirty

Spraying his cologne on both sides of his neck, Kai watched himself finish off getting ready for the Bladebreaker meet up in the large bedroom mirror.

He'd only returned to the house two nights ago having been staying at a nearby hotel for the past couple of days, his black holdall still by his wardrobe on the carpeted floor.

Kai ended up switching his phone off after he had made his future plans known to his not so secret admirer that day of the argument. As far as he was concerned there was no way that Ray could've talked himself out of _that_ one so why leave the damn thing on to just constantly ring, and ring, and ring?

Kai had gone back to the house the next morning to pick up some clothes and his laptop and to his relief the house was empty. He couldn't quite remember Ray's work schedule off the top of his head but was pleased to know he didn't have to face him just yet.

He _was_ greeted however with a note on his bedside table.

Ray knew Kai would have to come home at some point. If not for clothes for his work laptop at least.

Freakin' workaholic he is.

So since he wasn't going to hear him out, he could at least read what he had to say.

_4 days ago_

Entering the bedroom Kai could still smell Ray's body spray from when he'd gotten ready for work that morning. He must have only just missed him as the scent still lingered in the air.

Walking over towards his wardrobe Kai knelt down to grab his empty duffle bag and proceeded to fill it with clothes for the next few days. He wasn't sure how long he was going to stay away for. He just knew he needed time to think.

It was then that he noticed a folded sheet of paper on his bedside table.

Picking it up, crimson eyes flowed easily over the perfect handwriting.

_Kai,_

_I know you're mad at me but we need to talk about this.  
I'm aware of what Mariah is trying to do but you have to trust me when I say that  
I am __**NOT**__ interested in her.  
She means nothing to me. You need to believe that.  
I'll be home at 6:30 so hopefully I'll see you tonight but if not, call me at least?  
I love you._

_Ray x_

Lowering the note from his gaze Kai felt conflicted.

If Ray was really aware of what Mariah was doing why hadn't he put a stop to it?

If he'd made it clear to her nothing was ever going to happen between them again surely she wouldn't keep trying?

So he either has told her, and she's that much of a tramp to continue her pursuit anyway, _or _he hasn't told her and she knows no better.

If he hasn't told her, why not? Is he scared he'll upset her or something?

Or maybe he just likes the attention.. It wasn't like Ray had gotten much from him lately..

With a low growl at his own thoughts running away with themselves again, Kai chucked the note back on the bedside table to intentionally show it had been tampered with.

'_I'll call him I guess… See what he's got to say at least.'_

Having finished packing his bag he made a detour into the home office to grab his laptop and headed back to his hotel.

* * *

x-x-x

Placing the glass fragrance bottle down Kai rested both of his hands on the dresser and put his weight on it slightly.

'_Will he actually show up tonight?... Ugh, I shouldn't even care if he does or not.. Though, it would be interesting to see what would happen if were to see each other again.. Fuck this is so wrong..'_

He sighed through his nose and glanced down at the floor as a feeling of shame washed over him. He then looked back up at himself in the mirror with scolding eyes.

'_What is wrong with me? Why did I tell him?'_

Easing himself off the dresser his eyes met the wooden photo frame that was propped up beside various hair and skincare products. He picked it up.

It was of him and Ray taken at the beach last summer.

It was a beautiful few weeks of glorious sunshine. They'd both taken some time off work and spent every waking minute together.

They'd gone on a few picnics; had a whole bunch of lunch and dinner dates; gone to the seaside, where they had ice-cream and went to the fairground; they had a _whole_ lot of sex. Sometimes in the morning, sometimes at night… hell, morning _and_ night on some days.

Kai stroked over Ray's face in the photo with his finger. The two of them just looked so happy.

Why couldn't they just go back to that?

He then heard the front door open and close downstairs which was followed by the sound of a rucksack being dropped to the floor.

Ray must be home from work.

Exhaling through his nose once more as he placed the picture frame back down he fastened the cufflinks on his dark burgundy dress shirt and picked up his hair gel to style his hair.

'_Let's just try and have a good time tonight. It'll do you good to blow off some steam.' _

Downstairs Ray wandered into the kitchen and grabbed himself a beer from the fridge.

Pressing it against his forehead the cold bottle instantly relieved his clammy tanned skin that he'd sported since the lunch time rush. His white polo shirt had various food stains splattered on it and his usual perfectly spiked hair was also a bit of a mess.

After a few moments he popped off the metal cap with a fang and gulped the cool liquid down, the crisp bitter taste running down his throat satisfying his thirst and easing the stresses that came with working in a restaurant kitchen.

Walking through into the living room he placed the beer down onto the coffee table, plopped down onto the couch and turned on the TV. He'd jump in the shower once Kai was gone; he wanted to see him first. Though he wished he'd hurry up, he stunk of food and wanted to order a pizza.

As satisfied with his hair as he was going to be, Kai opened up his wardrobe to take out his freshly polished black shoes before leaving the bedroom to go downstairs.

Stopping at the second to last step he sat down and leisurely undid the laces. He seemed to be deep in thought.

Hearing him come down the stairs, and having noticed there were no dishes in the kitchen sink when he was in there Ray called out to him from the living room.

"Aren't you going to eat anything before you go babe?"

"Nah, I'll be fine.."

Having reassured his second mother and with his shoes all laced up Kai strode into the living room ready for his judgement.

Ray's clearly tired eyes gazed over from the television screen to the figure that had just entered the room.

A warm smile now sat upon his lips as he stared lovingly over at his boyfriend. He really was so proud to be his.

"You look nice babe." He said as chirpily as he could considering how tired he was.

"Mhm.. You're home early.."

Quickly brushing off compliments like he always did, yet soaking it up all the same, Kai leant down to place a kiss on Ray's head before sitting down beside him on the couch.

"Yeah it wasn't as busy as what we thought it was going to be tonight so a few of us got to leave."

"Hm.. What are you watching?" Kai plainly asked trying to make brief conversation.

"Nothing really it's just kind of on.. What time did you say you were meeting them?"

Kai glanced at the silver clock on the living room wall.

"Eight.. so I'm gonna have to leave soon."

"Mm.."

Kai lightly smiled.

"Sulking doesn't suit you Ray."

Ray pouted.

"I'm not sulking, it just sucks I had to work today when the team decides to go out on a bender.. _and_ you always look really hot so everyone's gonna be wanting a piece of you tonight."

With a faint chuckle Kai glanced at Ray before smugly looking back at the TV. He did love it when those golden eyes turned green.

"Well, I could always wait for you to get ready?" He suggested. "It wouldn't be a big deal if we were late."

He knew full well that Ray wouldn't be up for it but figured he'd offer anyway.

Ray pressed his lips together as he considered it but quickly shrugged off the idea.

"I'd love to but I'm exhausted… Gonna order a pizza, take a shower and have an early night I think."

Kai shrugged.

"Suit yourself. They'll be another time Ray so quit moping... and besides it'll give you some time to actually miss me.."

Ray's gaze was now transfixed on the older male beside him as he held a serious expression.

"I always miss you Kai."

Knowing he was looking directly at him, Kai continued to vacantly look up at the TV and avoid the eye contact.

"Don't see why, we haven't exactly been getting along lately."

"That doesn't mean I don't love you and still miss you when we're apart." Ray placed his hand over Kai's thigh as he spoke, caressing it lightly with his thumb hoping it would add some reassurance.

"Well whatever, I wouldn't miss me."

Lightly brushing off Ray's contact Kai stood up and went over to the mantelpiece to pick up his wallet.

Opening it to check he had his ID and bank card he buttoned it closed and placed it in to the back pocket of his black jeans. "I shouldn't be too late… Don't wait up."

Standing up from the couch, Ray followed Kai over to the front door.

"Yeah yeah, have a good time.. And don't be texting me drunken nonsense either." He said with a smirk.

Kai scoffed as he rolled his eyes.

"That was _one_ time, get over it."

Opening the front door he saw the cab pull up outside the house.

"Right, I'll see you later."

Ray placed a kiss on his cheek, "Tell the others I said hi okay?"

"Mhm."

Stepping outside Kai straightened his shirt collar and proceeded to walk down to the taxi.

"I love you!" Ray called after him with a smile.

Without looking back Kai casually replied, "That's nice!"

Opening the car door he looked back at his better half with a smirk, whilst unimpressed amber eyes glared back at him with folded arms waiting for the correct response.

"I love you _too_… I guess"

Throwing a cheeky wink Kai got into the car with his smile still prominent.

Ray shook his head with his own smile and waved towards the taxi as it took off.

'_Never gonna change…'_

* * *

x-x-x

It had just started to get dark as the taxi pulled up outside Toppers club.

Kai could see Max, Kenny and Tyson already gathered outside at the glass door entrance chatting away to each other as they waited for him to arrive.

Thanking and paying the driver Kai got out the cab and headed towards his old team mates.

Sporting dark blue jeans with a red short sleeved collared shirt, Tyson sparred the air like a boxer with excitement upon seeing his ex-captain. With his hair in his usual ponytail minus his trademark baseball cap, he called out to him as he joined the group.

"Yo Kai! Ready to paint the town red? Or blue in your case.."

"You don't get out much do you Tyson?" Kai cocked a brow as he looked down at him unimpressed.

"Heh no.. Being the face of the BBA is a 24/7 job.." Tyson sheepishly looked to the floor as he scratched his head before instantly perking back up. "But knowing Max was coming Mr D gave me the weekend off so let's get royally hammered guys!"

Shaking his head with a faint smile Kai then turned to face the bald suited bouncer that was stood at the entrance of the club with his arms folded. Giving each other a brief nod of their heads in acknowledgment, he opened the door for him granting him access.

Loud dance music instantly poured out the doors and danced around the boy's ears enticing them to enter.

As the other three began to follow behind Kai the door slammed shut, instantly muffling the music again as a muscular arm blocked their paths.

"I.D's." The bouncer sternly requested.

Having no issue with authority both Kenny and Max took out their driver's license from their wallets and handed them to him.

Tyson on the other hand, who'd already had a few pre-drinks before leaving home, was feeling just a little more confrontational.

"Seriously dude?! You're saying we look younger than 21? What an insult! Bro, you must know who we are?! You really need to see our I.D's?"

Both Max and Kenny shot Tyson a look of horror at his rebellious outburst.

"Tysonn!" The pair warned in unison through gritted teeth, their eyes still wide.

Did he really not see that this man was built like a brick shit house and could quite easily end his existence?

Handing the plastic cards back to the two conforming males the bouncer opened the door for them to go inside.

The blonde and petite brunette hesitantly left their team mate, throwing concerned looks back as they joined Kai who'd been stood waiting for them in the foyer.

Closing the door again once they were both inside the bouncer looked down in pity at Tyson before he nonchalantly spoke.

"I don't give a fuck who you are kid. I.D or you're not getting in."

Seeming to sober up real quick seeing all three of his friends inside and himself still out in the cool night air, Tyson's once strong demeanour softened as he meekly took out his driver's license from his wallet and held it out to him.

Snatching it, the bouncer took off his dark sunglasses to fully inspect the plastic card.

Awkwardly standing there like a scolded school boy, Tyson patiently waited as his ID was inspected.

Abruptly starting his quiz the bouncer spoke out.

"What's your last name?"

Tyson blinked. "Uh, Granger?"

He had to think twice then. If he had known he was going to be tested he wouldn't have had that second tequila shot at home.

Tyson's heart rate increased a little with nerves. What if he didn't let him in?_  
_  
Narrowing his eyes at Tyson from over the card, he continued to scan the printed information and compare the photograph to who stood before him.

"What month were you born in?" He continued to quiz.

Tyson spoke more confidently now. "March."

_'Come on dude it's definitely my I.D.. Urgh! He's so doing this on purpose.. Should've just kept my trap shut.'_

Mentally scolding himself Tyson looked to the side of the man at his friends through the glass with a look that screamed '**Help me**!'  
_  
_Kai, Max and Kenny watched the silent interrogation through the large windows.

"Ohh Tyson! I've always said his big mouth would get him in serious trouble one day! What if he doesn't let him in?"

Kenny agitatedly looked up at the know all ex leader who was just casually leaning on his shoulder against a wall, arms folded and clearly amused at the scene going on outside.

"It's fine Kenny, he'll get in. Rich is just toying with him right now." Kai coolly stated.

Max frowned once the Russian's statement registered in his brain and turned to face him.

"Wait, you know him Kai?"

Saving the blonde a glance Kai casually shrugged his free shoulder as he plainly replied once more.

"The company hires this place out all the time for events. I know most of the staff."

Kenny's mouth fell open, and both he and Max shared a look before Max spoke once more. A hint of annoyance laced his words.

"Bit of a mean trick dude, surely this could've all been avoided?"

Knowing 'Rich' would be wrapping up his act soon Kai peeled himself off the wall and turned to start walking towards the bar.

"Well that's what Tyson gets for being a dick. Anyways what you guys drinking, first rounds' on me."

Satisfied that the old world champion had learned his lesson on authority, Rich handed the I.D back to him who promptly put it back into his wallet.

With the glass door now open, Tyson exhaled a huge sigh of relief when he was reunited with the others who were now gathered at the bar.

"Sheesh! What an absolute ass that dude was! He was full on testing me! I even had to think what my last name was when he asked!"

With a chuckle Max clapped a hand on Tyson's shoulder as he joined them.

"Well you're inside now dude so let's just enjoy the night… Especially this since Kai paid for it."

Smirking, Max handed over a rum and coke to him.

Tyson took the tall glass with wide eyes and mouthed back as he pointed at the drink with his other hand.

"Kai paid? For this?... REALLY?"

Max raised his eyebrows in emphasis and nodded with a smile.

Using the back of his hand to shield his mouth Tyson whispered to the blonde.

His navy coloured eyes looking at Kai, then back to Max.

"Is he okay?"

Grabbing his own paid for drink from the bar Max shrugged his shoulders and slyly spoke back in the same manner as the two made their way to the tables.

"I wouldn't question it dude, just say thank you."

Tyson cupped his free hand at his mouth to call over to his ex-captain and gave a thumbs up.  
"Hey Kai! Cheers buddy!"

Making their way over to join Max and Tyson at the chosen table shortly afterwards, Kenny and Kai sat down placing both their drinks down.

"It's the last one you're getting from me Tyson so I'd sip it if I were you."

Tyson then spoke in a hushed tone to the group pretending that Kai wasn't there.

"Listen up guys, here's the plan. We just need to get Mr Money Bags over here really drunk to the point that buying his old buddies drinks all night seems like a really good idea." He hovered his hand in the centre of the table, "Who's in?"

Kai rolled his eyes. "Never gonna happen kid so you can try it all you like."

Kenny leaned over to Tyson as he spoke.

"He _is_ Russian y'know. He could probably drink you under the table Ty."

Tyson scoffed.

"Nah that's just a myth Chief, Russian's don't just _auto_ have a higher alcohol tolerance y'know."

"I heard instead of milk bottles in schools, they give the kids little cartons of vodka." Max chirped in as he swirled the ice cubes in his glass round with his straw purposely avoiding eye contact.

Kai threw the blonde a cocked eyebrow before rolling his eyes once more.

Tyson's eyes widened in genuine shock.

"No way! Really Max?"

The imagery of a classroom with thirty or so children sipping on little straws filled his mind.

Max couldn't keep the act up anymore and burst out laughing.

"You'd believe anything Tyson!"

Tanned cheeks instantly flushed in embarrassment.

"Pfft whatever!"

Sinking into his chair Tyson sucked on the paper straw in his drink before a look of disgust washed upon his face.

"Ugh! These things are awful. Whose idea was it to change the straws?"

Slamming his hand down on table, causing the drinks to shake, Max passionately exclaimed in jest at the comment.

"Paper straws are the future Tyson! We're saving the turtles!"

Lifting out the straw that had already started to go soggy Tyson looked at it in pity.

"Yeah but you need like, three of them for one drink.."

"Here's an idea…"

All three boy's attention turned to Kai as he started to speak.

"…Rather than use a straw like a little bitch, why not just drink straight from the glass, y'know like an adult?"

Kai then took a sip of his drink as he stared down Tyson over his glass.

Both Kenny and Max burst out laughing. Kai's sassy one liners were still comical to the group.

Sitting right back into his chair Tyson raised his hands up in a defensive stance.

"Is this just pick on Tyson day or something?!"

Both boys laughter then escalated into howls at his outburst.

Kai continued to drink, conveniently hiding his smirk on the rim of his glass.

Deep down, he'd missed these guys.

* * *

x-x-x

It was around midnight now. The boys had been in the club for a good few hours, their eyes long adjusted to the darkness.

Heavy dance music blared throughout as the place was now packed full of fellow party goers.

Bright neon lights both illuminated and casted shadows over the entirety of the room and with the help of the smoke machines working overtime, a blanket of haze transcended over the crowd giving drunk faces more mystery. A multitude of sins were currently being concealed on the sticky dance floor.

Feeling a buzz in his pocket Kai reached for his phone and took a glimpse at the illuminated screen.

[T: = I'm here. Where are you?]

Kai's breath hitched in his throat as a rush of anxiety swirled in his stomach.

Shit. He'd completely forgotten about Tala.  
_  
_His vision now darted around the club like a hunted animal and scoured the scene for the redhead.

Between the smoke, flashing lights and several drinks now in his system it was hard to make anyone out in particular.

Ignoring the text he shoved the phone back into his pocket.

He couldn't look too suspicious, not in front of the others.

Lifting his drink from the table he took a few large sips of his whiskey and coke to try and calm his nerves.

_'I shouldn't have told him I was going out. What was I thinking?!'  
_  
It was then that his phone vibrated again. Only this time the vibrations seemed to go on for longer.

Hesitantly taking it from his pocket again there was an incoming call.

= Tala Landscaper =

_'Fucks sake.'_

Pressing his lips together Kai put the device back into his pocket, the vibrations continuing against his thigh.

Trying to stay composed he looked over his shoulder again. He hated feeling like this. The paranoia, the anxiety. He couldn't relax now knowing he was nearby somewhere.

Was it getting hot in here?

Unfastening the few top buttons on his shirt with one hand Kai took another swig of his drink, seeking comfort from the ice.

Noticing the change in Kai's demeanour Max leant over and called into his ear, hoping to be heard over the loud music.

"You okay dude?"

Kai simply responded with a nod and took another mouthful of his drink.

_'Why did I tell him I'd be here? Why did I encourage all this? Me and Ray are good now, I think.. Fuck I'm so __**stupid!**__'_

Guilt ridden thoughts ran through his mind as he continued to cautiously scan around the club once more.

_'This is too real... I know - I'll just play stupid in the morning. Say my phone died. Oops, my bad, yeah. I'll just text him that tomorrow.'_

\- And then he saw him.

Sporting white jeans with the sleeves rolled up on his fitted black shirt, Tala stood with his back up against the bar.

His arms bent resting on the counter like he owned the place. Like the alpha lion watching over his pride he just oozed confidence and sex appeal.

Two females, a blonde and a brunette were currently fussing over him.

Of course they were. He was gorgeous.

His red locks free of the baseball cap and spiked flawlessly with two perfectly equal strands of hair falling over his freshly shaven face.

Glad that the females had his attention, Kai faced towards the group again.

He wouldn't notice him all the way over here.

Several minutes had passed and the team were currently chatting away and reminiscing.

"Oh oh! Do you remember that chick Emily? Kenny definitely wanted to tap that."

With a grin on his face Tyson nudged Kenny with his elbow as he spoke.

"No I did not!"

A blush immediately appeared over Kenny's cheeks as he defended himself. Thankfully with it being so dark in the place the others didn't notice it.

"You _so_ did Chief! Don't lie!" Max teased and took a sip of his drink.

Kai's phone vibrated again in his pocket. To his relief just the once.

The 60 seconds that he ignored that text for felt like an hour.

Hesitantly taking out the device he read the text preview on the screen.

[T: 8 o'clock.]

Kai frowned. _'8 o'clock?'_ He turned to his left.

And there he was.

Crimson met aqua as Kai and Tala's eyes locked through the sea of people.

Time seemed to stand still as they stared each other down, almost not believing the sight that was before them.

Kai's blood ran cold. It was clear he'd been watching him for a while.

How did he find him?!

With his prey now aware of his presence Tala shoved his phone back into his pocket, a devilish smirk danced upon his lips.

He was as sexy as he remembered him..

Proceeding to make his way through the crowd, he kept his eyes firmly locked on Kai.

Kai's heart began to race as he quickly thought of what to do.

Downing his drink and firmly setting the empty glass down on the table he leaned over and called into Max's ear.

"I'll be right back!"

Standing up from the table he began to make his way through the crowd to the downstairs restrooms.

_'They can't see me talk to him. They just can't. They'll say something to Ray.. FUCK!'_

Seeing Kai leave the pack, Tala made the same detour and proceeded to casually follow him down the stairs.

Pushing on the wooden door Kai was relieved to see the bathroom and all the stalls were completely empty.

Walking over to the tiled wall furthest away from the door he leaned against it for support and stared at the door trying to calm himself, his chest currently heaving in and out.

Any second now he was going to come through that door.. and then what?

_'Then what?!'_

He felt physically sick.

Possibly due to the amount of alcohol he'd consumed, but more so the crippling anxiety sitting in the pit of his stomach.

Kai tried to steady his breathing as he counted down.

3…2….1..

The wooden door swung open, and Tala was now standing before him.

"Don't you like answering your phone?" He taunted as he strutted into the bathroom, the door closing shut behind him.

Kai shrugged and pointed to the ceiling.

"Loud music.. Didn't hear it."

He knew he wouldn't buy it but it was worth a shot.

"Mhm, course you didn't… Anyway, you're looking fine as.."

Brushing off the blatant lie Tala began to drink up the younger male as he sauntered towards him.

Biting his lower lip icy eyes danced up and down Kai's figure as he began to mentally undress him.

With him getting nearer, Kai tried his best to come across unfazed as he folded his arms and cocked a brow.

"Scrub up well yourself. Guessing your girlfriend picked out your shirt? 'Cos I can't see you having any sort of fashion sense all on your own."

Looking down at his fitted black shirt, Tala stroked his fair hands down his torso feeling the silky material.

"Yeah she bought me it actually."

Blue eyes then looked back up at Kai with a glint of amusement as he attempted to sound innocent.

"You like it?"

Unable to suppress the smirk that tugged at his lips, Kai shook his head as he responded.

"You really are something else Tala."

This was not the same guy who came to fix up his yard.

Whilst he sensed a slight cheeky attitude Kai didn't anticipate the redhead would be this audacious.

Closing the distance between them Tala took a final step forward and gazed down at Kai's body, a single finger caressed down his chest to his abs through his burgundy shirt before he locked with crimson eyes. "Yeah but you like it.. Don't you?"

Kai slightly unnerved by the intense eye contact and touch from his predator, looked away. A light blush now upon his cheeks he firmly pressed his lips together to diminish the cursed smile that was giving all his thoughts away.

"I'll take that as a yes.. You fucking want this as much as I do Hiwatari just admit it. You love the thrill."

It was true. He did.

The absolute scandal of it all.

Tala excited him and it was something Kai had never experienced before.

He'd had random flings in the past sure, but they were all innocent on his part - he was single.

But this?

Both parties having a significant other? It was dirty. Immoral… But he wasn't doing anything to stop it.

Tipsy eyes then gazed back at the hungry ones that had never stopped staring at him.

He was losing control. Kai was completely captivated by those glacial blue eyes; he felt helpless… but he didn't want to be saved.

"..I.. I don't know what you want from me Tal.."

He knew he sounded pathetic right now.

Of course he knew what Tala wanted. He'd wanted to screw him ever since he first laid eyes on him as he came down the stairs that morning to get more coffee.

Licking his lips Tala reached to Kai's jawline and caressed it with his thumb.

Bringing his face in dangerously close, he whispered into Kai's now parted lips.

"How about I just show you-"

The restroom door then swung open.

Tala immediately stepped away from Kai and quickly pressed down on a tap at one of the sinks to begin an innocent washing his hands act.

A somewhat worse for wear Tyson then stumbled in with music flowing in behind him.

"Heyy buddy! Wondered where you'd gone. *_Hic.*_ You good?.. I'm pretty hammered to be honest… But I'm good! _*Hic*"_

With the wooden door closing the music muffled once more.

Watching as his old team mate stumbled over to the urinals a flustered Kai knew any sort of response to his question would have been a waste of breath.

Not that he could muster any words right now anyway.

Tyson flushed and staggered over to the sinks, standing in between Tala who, keeping up his "minding his own business" act, went to go dry his hands under the dryer, and Kai who was stood with his back still against the tiled wall.

"You coming back up then dude? Max is _*hic*_ talking to a really pretty blonde.. Who knew that guy was so smooth!" Tyson chirpily slurred in between his hiccups.

"Y-Yeah, the music was just starting to get on my nerves.. I'll be up soon. Go ahead."

Kai brushed off all he'd said and gestured towards the door with a nod in hope Tyson would just leave.

But that, along with the agitation in his voice went completely unnoticed.

Clumsily wiping his hands on his jeans to dry them Tyson swayed towards him and threw an arm over his broad shoulders in affection but mostly for balance.

"Nahh come on buddy I'm not _*hic*_ going without you... You're missing out on _major_ entertainment up there!"

Tala glared over with his hands still under the dryer. Clearly frustrated but knowing full well he couldn't do anything to intervene, he sent Kai a wide eyed expression - '**Get rid of him!**"

Realistically this was the safety net Kai needed to escape, but those demanding peer pressure inducing eyes held him captive to the point he desperately racked his brain to find a way to please his captor.

He awkwardly shrugged Tyson off of him, reached for the wallet in his back jean pocket and took out his black credit card.

"Okay but first, here."

Kai held out the card and placed a hand on Tyson's shoulder hoping to get his complete undivided attention. Looking straight into his eyes Kai's next words were spoken slowly and precise so even a child could understand.

He knew full well this was a terrible idea, but he really needed to get him out of here.

"Go get everyone another drink, and I'll meet you up there in a bit, okay?"

Tyson's eyes comically widened as he took hold of the black card, his mouth also followed suit. Grazing his thumb over the embossed silver letters he read out the text in his mind.

'_Mis-ter… K… Hi-wa-tari. Fuck. This is really Kai's credit card. I am holding.. __**Kai's **__credit card. Holy mother of God.'_

"A-Are you sure?" Tyson squeaked, his eyes now looking up at him.

Nope. Not at all.

"Yeah go on back up, I'll find you. I just need to piss now. Go."

Kai was practically walking Tyson out of the restroom at this point. Tyson was still holding on the card staring down at it in awe. He'd never held a black credit card before.

He then stopped walking and looked back up at Kai once more, the alcohol in his system giving him the confidence to push his luck.

"C-Can I get shots too?"

A growl rumbled in Kai's throat.

"Yes! Get whatever you want Tyson, just-fucking go!" He barked as he started to lose his cool with him. His eyes hesitantly looked towards Tala whose own frustrated glare never faltered.

With a dopey grin on his face Tyson slowly moseyed over to the restroom door and pulled on the metal handle to open it before turning back to look at Kai.

"You're the best buddy… I can't believe I _*hic*_ used to hate you.."

Kai opened his mouth to retort but closed it again once Tyson's words had registered in his own tipsy mind.

He really didn't have a response to that.

Just as he was about to walk out inebriated navy eyes then noticed the random guy who had been in there with them the whole time, awkwardly stood there now pretending to be texting.

With a nod Tyson slurred, "Heyy nice shirt dude."

Tala coolly glanced up and briefly nodded back acknowledging the compliment before Tyson stumbled out the door.

With it closing behind him, the wolf and phoenix were finally alone once more.

"_That_.. was actually painful… What a _fuckin'_ loser…" Tala sneered at the restroom door before his focus was back on Kai.

"Now, where were we?"

Making up for lost time he stalked back over to Kai and roughly cupped the back of his head in his hand to bring their faces mere inches apart once more.

Lightly pressing his hands against Tala's chest, Kai moved his head away pushing against the hand behind his head creating some distance.

"We can't do this, what about your girlfriend?"

Seeing Kai's neck completely exposed Tala pounced on it, alternating between kisses and sucking he casually responded, his breath warming his ivory skin.

"What about her?"

Breathing heavier now Kai moaned out another pitiful attempt to stop him, whilst deep down wanting it all to continue.

"W-What if someone comes back in here?"

With Kai's slate hair intertwined in his fingers Tala pulled him back in close.

Using his other hand he took a hold of his jaw and forced him to look directly at him.

Kai's lips then parted slightly almost begging to be touched as he stared into blue smouldering eyes.

He had this starving stare to him that if Kai was honest, unnerved him a little. But he couldn't help getting lost in those lust-filled pools of aqua.

_'Works every time.' _

Tala knew he had him hooked.

Gazing deep into crimson orbs he then spoke in a hushed yet assertive husky tone to end all of Kai's excuses.

"Then we'd better make it fast."

Tala then pressed his lips against Kai's with his tongue wasting no time in exploring his mouth.

Taking a hold of fiery red hair, Kai automatically fought for charge but was no match for the domineering wolf.

It was clear he'd done this a thousand times before. His talented tongue intertwining with Kai's, tasting him completely.

He'd had never been manhandled like this before. It was he who was always in command. When it came to anything sexual he knew what he was doing but Tala made him feel like a complete novice. Maybe it was the alcohol hindering him?

Whatever it was he knew he couldn't over power him, not in his current intoxicated state.

Kai accepted his submission to him as he knew next time he'd definitely show Tala who's boss.  
_  
'Wait, next time? What am I saying?!'_

Kai's wild thoughts ceased as Tala abruptly pulled away from the passionate kiss causing him to crack open his eyes.

He was then practically dragged and pushed into the nearest bathroom stall before he could even catch his breath.

Tala slammed the door and locked it behind them giving Kai just enough time to regain his balance before grabbing his face and crushing their lips together once more as he pressed him up against the side of the cubicle.

Kai felt light headed.

This was getting too much.

That last vodka shot going straight to his head now, he was starting to spin.

Tala's hands frantically made their way to undo the buttons on Kai's shirt. Quickly losing his patience he ripped it open, causing the last 3 buttons to tear off the maroon material.

Breaking the kiss he took a small step back with the little room they had to take in the sight before him.

The big boss man himself, multi-millionaire, Kai Hiwatari, a completely defenceless, flustered mess in a basement bathroom stall.

Putty in his hands.

A smug smile sat on Tala's face. He knew he wasn't _all that._

Gripping a hold of Kai's wrists he tightly held them up above his head and kicked the inside of his left foot causing Kai's legs to part more.

Kai inhaled sharply as his heart skipped a beat at how easy he was just physically manipulated.

Replacing the grip on his wrists with one of his forearms Tala now used his free hand to cup the hardened bulge in Kai's jeans as he towered over him.

"Seem a little tight these jeans don't you think, Kai?" He faked a tone of concern. "Maybe we should.. Take them off?"

Kai wanted to respond but no words came out of his desperate gaping mouth.

Completely under the wolf's spell all he could do was nod as he pressed his lips tightly together and swallowed hard.

His mind completely taken over by lust as Tala skilfully undid the button on his jeans with one hand before pulling down his zipper.

Briefly pressing his lips against the younger males once more he then trailed kisses along Kai's jawline as his free hand now easily made its way into his Calvin Klein boxers.

With his warm breath caressing Kai's neck as he next spoke ruby eyes fluttered closed, a soft moan escaped his lips and he tilted his head to the side to expose more of his fair skin.

"To think we could have been doing this the whole time I was over working on the yard.."

Kai bit his lower lip as Tala's audacity made yet another appearance.

On the outside a man dressed in a grey uniform strolled into the bathroom with a bright yellow industrial mop bucket on wheels.

Noticing 2 pairs of legs in the locked stall he tutted, mentally cursed the club for 'Not paying him enough to always have to deal with this shit' and pounded his fist against the door.

"Hey! Only one person in a cubicle at a time!"

Unlike Kai who jumped at the noise, Tala, completely unfazed by the bang on the door leisurely backed away from Kai and removed the hand he had in his boxers.

Pressing his lips together to hold back his laugh like a naughty child that had just been caught he called out to the janitor in an exaggerated sweet tone.

"Just a second!"

He gestured for Kai to sort himself out as his hand rested on the lock.

Kai frantically pulled up the zipper on his jeans before Tala effortlessly unlocked the door with a flick of his fingers.

As the door opened he glowered at the janitor for his rude interruption before arrogantly strolling past him, knocking his shoulder with his as he passed.

"See you later Mr Hiwatari.."

The scowl quickly transitioned to an expression of superiority as he sauntered out of the restroom.

Avoiding eye contact as he queried, a faint blush washed over the janitor's cheeks as he almost felt the overwhelming embarrassment on Kai's behalf.

"A-Are you okay there sir?" He stuttered.

The last person he would've expected to see behind that stall door would've been the CEO of Hiwatari enterprises. He wasn't 100% clued up on all the latest celebrity gossip but he was pretty sure the young executive was with a Chinese boy?

Straightening himself up off of the cubicle wall, his feathers royally ruffled Kai cleared his throat and clumsily began buttoning up his shirt.

"Y-yes… I'm fine... Just.. Please, don't breathe a word of this to anyone."

He too avoided eye contact as he tried to regain some of his dignity, though it was very obvious to the janitor how drunk he was.

He nodded to him regardless whilst keeping his eyes low. "Of course sir."

* * *

_x-x-x_

Stumbling out of the taxi Kai staggered up the driveway and fumbled in his pockets for his front door key.

He didn't see Tala again for the rest of the time he was out and having re-joined the others back upstairs he proceeded to purchase a few rounds of shots to help him try forget what had occurred in that bathroom stall.

Squinting his eyes to focus on the key hole it took him an entire 5 attempts to slide the key in, turn it, and pull down the door handle.

Swinging open the door clinging onto the handle for support, he fell into the house and pushed the door shut behind him with more force then he anticipated.

Hearing the slam he winced as if he felt the doors pain.

"Shhh!"

Kai held his index finger to his lips as he hesitantly gazed up at the ceiling.

Maybe Ray's catlike senses weren't working tonight and he totally didn't hear that..

Yeah right.

Upstairs Ray was laid in the dark staring up at the bedroom ceiling. He'd actually woken up on Kai's 3rd try of getting the key in the door and was contemplating on whether to help the Russian up to bed or just leave the bastard to fend for himself.

Upon hearing the kitchen light turn on Ray knew he had to get up to make sure this guy didn't get any bright ideas like cooking in his intoxicated state.

With a growl he threw off the bed sheets and made his way down the stairs.

Pausing in the kitchen doorway Ray folded his arms over his chest as he watched Kai attempt to make himself some toast.

Attempt, because although he'd managed to put the bread in Kai had failed to flick on the switch, so after the 7th time of him pressing down the lever and it not sticking Ray had seen enough of the perplexed expression on his lovers face and felt the need to intervene.

"What time do you call this Kai?"

Not taking any notice of who was speaking to him and just focusing on giving a correct answer, Kai looked up to the wooden clock on the kitchen wall and strained his eyes trying to steady his vision to read the time.

"…3?… no… 4… 4:45? Shiit..." He dopily smirked and sounded quite impressed with himself for managing to stay out so late.

Ray stared at him in disgust.

He hated seeing him like this. He was such an arrogant drunk.

"Go to bed Kai. We'll talk about this in the morning."

Kai scoffed as his attention went back to the toaster lever and mocked Ray's voice in a tone that sounded absolutely nothing like him.

"Go to _bed_ Kaiii, we'll talk about this in the morninggg."

Ray tutted.

"Dickhead…" he muttered to himself as he knew Kai wouldn't take any notice. He then frowned as he saw the state Kai's shirt was in.

"What happened to your buttons?" he asked.

Kai gave up on the clearly broken toaster with a huff before looking over in Ray's direction.

"Huh?"

Ray's patience was starting to run thin. With an exasperated sigh he repeated himself.

"Your buttons? On your shirt? What happened to your shirt Kai?"

The more Ray watched the mess that was his boyfriend the more annoyed he could feel himself getting.

He was tired, it had long gone past the point of funny now.

Staring down with a dumbfound expression Kai held both sides of his ruined shirt open, shrugged and slurred an unconvincing, "I dunno."

Pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand Ray pointed at the stairs with the other.

"Go to Bed. Now."

Kai's attention then went from his wrecked shirt over to Ray.

Now Kai found Ray pretty attractive on a normal day, but being completely fuelled with alcohol and still pretty wound up from his little bout with Tala earlier, that kitten stood in the doorway was looking rather ravishing.

Stalking towards him he looked him up and down like a famished animal.

"Bed sounds like a pretty good idea to be honest.."

Grabbing hold of his hips he roughly pulled Ray in close and went straight for his neck.

"Ow! _Don't _Kai," Ray warned as he pulled away from the tight grip Kai had on his skin.

"I'm not talking to you right now, you're being sloppy. Go to bed."

Now Ray found Kai pretty irresistible on a normal day, but being stone cold sober, and seeing this guy slur his words whilst reeking of booze, Kai was anything but attractive right now. As a matter of fact he was pretty repulsed right about now.

"Come on, what are you scared of?"

Kai closed the distance again causing Ray to take another step backwards. His back was up against the wall in the hallway now. He had nowhere else to go.

"Kai, I _said_ stop."

Slight fear now laced Ray's tone as he pushed on Kai's broad chest to try and keep some distance between them as Kai's hands continued to grip hold and grope him. All he could smell was a mixture of his faded cologne, sweat and hard liquor.

Kai had never looked at him like this before.

It was almost, animalistic.

This wasn't the Kai he knew.

The Kai he knew had a gaze that softened every time their eyes met. It was almost like he was possessed.

Fair hands then grabbed a fistful of his hair before Kai forced his lips on his as his other hand tried to make its way into his pyjama bottoms.

Struggling between Kai and the wall, Ray used all of his strength to push on his chest to get him away from him.

"I SAID STOP!" He cried out as he raised his hand and slapped Kai across the face. Hard.

Kai's face snapped to the side immediately after the contact, his eye's widening in shock.

'_D-Did he just hit me?' _

He lifted his hand up to his now reddened cheek before staring back at Ray completely stunned.

The pain was numbed from all the alcohol but his skin felt warm to touch.

Ray glared back at him with panic ridden watery eyes, his chest was heaving as the adrenaline coursed through his veins.

"D-Don't you dare come near me!" his voice cracked as he tried to hold back his tears. He'd never had to raise a hand to anyone in his life but he dreaded to think what would have happened if he hadn't done so. "You can sleep on the couch."

Quickly shoving past him Ray hurried up the stairs as the tears began to fall.

Once he was back in their bedroom he slammed the door closed behind him and threw himself onto their bed.

With his hand still against his throbbing cheek, Kai's dumbfound gaze followed Ray as he ran up the stairs.

Upon hearing their door slam Kai flinched, the very faint sound of sobs not quite making it to his ears as he drifted into the living room like a lost sheep.

Slumping down onto the couch he felt the sudden need to grip hold of the arm as he tried to steady himself, his vision had suddenly gone blurry.

The room was spinning.

His lungs then took it upon themselves to deeply inhale and exhale all on their own.

His breathing became short and rapid with his whole face suddenly feeling incredibly warm though all colour had drained from his cheeks.

It wasn't long before the intense wave of nausea took over him and the contents of his stomach were splattered all over the laminate floor.

Hot tears spilled from his eyes as he lurched forward, his stomach continuing to violently retch with nothing but liquid from the evening continuing to pour from his throat.

Gasping for air a few minutes later he weakly wiped his lips with his shirt sleeve before collapsing onto his side exhausted as sleep finally consumed him.

* * *

A/N: Oh my sweet boy. Didn't no one ever teach you to **never** go out drinking on an empty stomach?

*shrugs* We've all been there.

I'm going away in two weeks so will be uploading the next chapter from the Dominican Republic! Ohh all the rum.. A tipsy Katya might make for some interesting content..

Hopefully see you on the next one! K~


	6. Déjà vu

A/N: Hola from the Dominican Republic!

I was determined to get this up on Wednesday as I usually upload every 2 weeks but it just wasn't happening for this chapter. I still felt like I had loads to put in and I didn't wanna rush it.. But it's my birthday tomorrow and we've a lot planned so I have spent the majority of today working on it to get it up!

Anyhoo, hope you's enjoy this one :) I know I did ;D

* * *

Chapter 6. Déjà vu

"I think we should go on a break."

Slouching on the sofa in last night's now creased clothes, Kai groggily peered over his mug of steaming black coffee towards Ray, who had just sharply spoken to him from the living room doorway.

'_Really?...We're going to do this_ _**now**_?'

Kai's head was pounding, his throat was as dry as one of Gandhi's flip-flops, and he could've sworn his boyfriend had just blurted out something ridiculous at him.

He thought it was pretty selfish of Ray to try and start some shit when he could blatantly see he was _dying_ over here.

Could he not see he was _dying_?!

It was a chore for him to even speak right now... but Kai just had to hear that again.

He can't have heard him right the first time.

A break? Like, break up? Where was all this even coming from?

He deeply inhaled through his nose letting the coffee's sweet aroma dance up his nostrils, the familiar soothing scent beginning to comfort his battered soul.

With a slow exhale Kai then lazily questioned.

"_What_?"

Ray's previous strong stance softened as he released the breath he didn't know he'd been holding and leaned against the wooden door frame.

Nothing got past Kai; he'd heard him first time alright. Why he was trying to make him repeat what was already a hard sentence to say was beyond him.

He'd been mulling over this since the early hours of this morning having not being able to get back to sleep thanks to _him, _and only further adding insult to injury when he had to get out of bed _again_ half an hour later once Kai had passed out to clean up his vomit.

Having not even received a 'thank you' for that, Ray could only presume that he didn't even remember spewing everywhere just a few hours ago. Which meant he probably couldn't remember how forceful he was with him either when he had finally come home..

"I'm going to go back home for a few days... To go see my family and clear my head for bit."_  
_  
Amber eyes would usually soften at the sight of the stoic Russian but they currently held a firm, bright gaze as Ray held his nerve and stood tall.

It wasn't that he enjoyed seeing his boyfriend in any sort of aguish, but he couldn't lie, seeing Kai in his delicate state this morning did bring slight joy to him.

He deserved it. The way he acted last night was disgusting. It just convinced him all the more to stand by the decision he had finally managed to make.

Hungover or not, Kai needed to hear it.

"I think we need to be apart for a little while." Ray added, his voice starting to lower. He would've been lying if he said this wasn't at all upsetting for him, but he had to be direct.

This was serious.

'_Yep, we're __**really**__ doing this.'_

Kai rolled his eyes. God he really didn't need this right now.

"So what, you're breaking up with me? All 'cos I got a little drunk last night? Damn Ray that's dramatic, even for _you_." He bit as he turned his head away from him completely brushing off the entire situation as just another one of their little tiffs.

Ray's mouth dropped open as he scoffed.

"A little?!" He gestured towards the front door. "Kai, I heard you tell the door to shush after you slammed it shut. I'm suprised you even remembered where you lived considering how trashed you were."

Still avoiding eye contact Kai nonchalantly took a sip of his coffee like Ray hadn't just spoken.

The mug conveniently hid his bashful smirk.

Yeah, he remembered doing that now actually. What an idiot.

Getting no verbal response Ray continued.

"Do you remember what else you did?"

A slight look of concern washed over Kai as his focus trailed back to Ray in the doorway.

There was _more?_

"What did I do?" He asked firmly but with clear apprehension in his voice.

Ray swallowed.

He knew that Kai would never forgive himself if he told him that he had physically hurt him last night, so rather than rub salt in _that_ wound he chose to redirect.

"You puked all over the living room floor."

Kai's eyes scanned over the spotless wooden flooring before frowning at Ray like he'd just straight lied to him.

Ray tutted upon seeing the clear sceptism.

"I cleaned it up obviously!"

Kai looked away from him again, somwhat embarrassed.

".. Well.. thanks.." he muttered sheepishly. ".. Sorry.."

Ray shrugged a shoulder.

"Forget about it.."

After a moments silence, Ray then proceeded to take the bull back by the horns and reinstate his decision to him.

"..I'm not breaking up with you Kai I just, think we need some space from each other. Otherwise it'll just get worse and worse between us and_ I_ don't want us to break up… do _you_?"

His expression was solemn as he spoke. His eyes fixed on Kai as he waited for an answer.

Kai had never seen Ray like this before. He was so.. serious.

Had he really fucked up that bad last night to the point he didn't even want to be around him anymore?

Everything was still a huge blur. He did sorta think they were okay now... Apparently not.

Kai brought the mug down from his face and rested it on his lap.

His own expression now slightly guilt-ridden as he stared into the coffee.

He could feel Ray's eyes all over him as silence now filled the room. He knew he must've really messed up. Ray wasn't usually this uptight over nothing.

But wanting to leave?

Kai's eyes then met the part of his shirt where three buttons once were.

'_What the __**fuck**__ happened last night?'_

"Well Kai? Do you?" Ray barked as he was losing his patience.

Kai's silence was saying it all right now in his eyes.

Did he really not give a shit to even _try_ to pretend he wanted them to stay together? Clearly he was making the right choice to leave after all.

Kai tensed.

He opened his mouth to speak but then slowly closed it again.

If he was honest with himself he didn't even know what he wanted anymore. He loved Ray. Of course he did. Well. In his own little way. But he'd be lying if he said he was truly happy with him at the moment.

"... I think space will do us good." He finally managed to muster.

Ray folded his arms.

He'd completely avoided his question. Of course he did. Kai was only ever direct when the ball was in his court.

Normally Ray would bite and straight ask him again, but he'd just about had it with Kai's shit for one weekend, and quite frankly he couldn't be bothered repeating himself. His response wasn't going to change the upcoming events anyway.

"Will you be able to take me to the airport then?" He then asked, a bout of anxiety now swirled in his stomach as he knew what was coming next.

Kai slowly nodded.

"Yeah I guess. Why, when are you planning on going?"

Ray pressed his lips together. There it was.

Maybe booking a last minute flight whilst overtired and upset this morning wasn't the best idea he'd ever had. But regardless, he'd made his decision, and was going to stand by it regardless.

"Uhm... at six."

Ray braced himself, his eyes were now on anything but Kai.

Piercing crimson eyes shot up and focused on him.

"What? Today?"

The neko-jin slowly nodded.

Kai snickered.

"Well fuck _me_ Ray, you just couldn't wait to get away from me or something? Why didn't you just pack your shit and fuck off before I even woke up? That would've _really_ added to the drama! Am I really _that_ bad to you?!" He shouted as he slammed his coffee mug onto the table in front of him.

With Kai's voice ringing in his ears Ray snapped and raised his own voice.

This guy had _no_ right to shout at him right now, _especially_ after last night.

"As a matter of fact Kai yes, lately you have been!"

Kai bounded up from the couch and held his arms out.

"HOW?!" He shrieked back at him, "What the _fuck_ do I do to you Ray that's so goddamn awful?!"

That's it. Ray was done protecting him and his feelings.

Roughly lifting up his t-shirt Ray then pulled down his bottoms a little to show him one of his hips.

"You see _this_? LOOK!"

Kai's eyes obeyed and immediately went to his tanned bare skin that appeared to have a large purple-black smudge across his hip.

He frowned, his whole demeanour softening instantly upon seeing Ray was hurt.

"What happened?" he asked, everything from his face to his tone softening and flooding with concern.

A look of confusion was painted on his face. He didn't get it? What did that have to do with him?

"YOU happened Kai!" Ray screamed at him, "I told you to stop and you wouldn't!"

"I-I did that?" Kai stuttered as his gaze was transfixed on the discoloured flesh. "H-How-"

"-Don't wonder why I'm leaving Kai." Ray carefully pulled his bottoms back up over his bruised hip and let go of his shirt.

A brief snippet of the two of them stood close together in the hallway then played back in Kai's mind. He'd remembered Ray telling him to stop but figured he was just playing hard to get. When did he grab him hard enough to cause that though?

… Must've been what caused him to slap him… Shit, he remembered that too now…

"Ray, I-I'm sorry I didn't mean t-"

Ray lifted his hand.

"Just.. Save it.."

Before Kai could catch golden eyes begin to glisten Ray turned on his heel and went upstairs to pack his suitcase.

Feeling completely helpless Kai sat back down onto the sofa with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

* * *

x-x-x

Kai waited behind with the duffle bag as Ray walked up to the airport check in.

Showing his ticket and passport to the immaculately groomed member of staff that was sat behind the desk, Ray lifted up his suitcase on to the conveyer belt to be weighed before she wrapped a destination label around the handle and it was sent off for boarding.

The half an hour drive to the airport was a quiet one.

It had started raining so the intermittent sound of the windscreen wipers made the silence less intense but it was still uncomfortable, even for Kai.

Having checked in and received his boarding card Ray then strolled back over to the taller male whose expression remained vacant, his gaze low.

"I'll call you when I land, okay?" Ray reassured, trying his best to sound cheerful as he spoke.

He wasn't pleased about this by any means, but it was too late to change his mind now right?

Kai handed Ray his hand luggage back and simply responded with a slow nod in acknowledgment.

He really didn't know what to say to him right now. He just knew that he didn't want him to leave but knew it was too late to even try and stop him.

Having thought about it all, (and this whole situation really was all the Russian had thought about since Ray had blurted it out this morning) surely being apart would just make things worse?

With Kai's gaze refusing to connect with his own, Ray's own eyes glossed over as they began to well up with tears.

He'd tried to stay strong all day. They had both agreed this was for the best, but even with Kai's blank expression he could always tell when he was upset and it broke his heart.

Releasing his grip on the duffle bag he then flung his arms around Kai's neck, burying his face into his shoulder as the luggage fell by their feet.

"I really hope we can get through this Kai," Ray's voice cracked as he sniffled into his shirt.

Automatically wrapping his arms around him, Kai stroked the back of Ray's head and pulled him in tighter.

"We will… We always do… Right?" He tried to swallow away the lump that had now formed in his throat. His voice too was laced with an uncertainty that he hoped would go unnoticed.

After a few minutes Ray broke away from the embrace to wipe his now reddened eyes.

Noticing the damp patch on Kai's shirt at the shoulder he rubbed over it with his free hand in a useless attempt to dry it off.

He softly laughed.

"Sorry about that."

Looking down at his shoulder Kai passively shook his head and returned a faint smile of his own.

"It's fine, don't worry about it."

Turning round to look up at the digital flight board, Ray scanned for his flight number seeing what gate he had to head towards.

He looked back to face Kai again, his eyes starting to gloss over once more.

"I should get going…"

Kai mentally cursed the screen and wondered who he could pay to put '**cancelled**' next to his flight number.

Hell, just a '**delayed**' would suffice even.

"You don't have to.." Kai mumbled as he took a hold of Ray's hands. ".. Could always just get your case back and we go home.."

Ray lightly smiled at his very 'Kai' way of trying to convince him to stay.

Would it really kill him to get on his knees and beg? Clutching at his ankles letting the whole airport know how much he loved him and couldn't bear to be without him?

Never mind that would be kind of embarrassing actually..

"No.. I do.." Ray squeezed his hands before letting go of them, "It'll do us some good.. I'll see you in a little while."

Kai lightly sighed with a defeated expression on his face.

Maybe absence will make the heart grow fonder? That's what they say isn't it?

He racked his brain to try and find some sort of light to all of this. Guess he just had to take Ray's word for it.

Picking up his bag from the floor Ray placed a soft kiss on his lips before turning to start walking away.

Kai grabbed his arm.

"Call me as soon as you land yeah?"

He almost sounded a little desperate in his demand. Ray had already said he would but he just felt the need to request it himself to make it more official.

Ray nodded, and turned to hug him once more.

"I promise I'll call you as soon as I land… I love you Kai."

Kai attempted to swallow that damn burning lump in his throat again but his voice still cracked anyway when he next spoke.

"I love you too Ray.."

* * *

x-x-x

The house was quiet.

_Too_ quiet.

Usually Kai loved the silence but that damn clock ticking on the wall was beginning to get on his last nerve.

Had it always been that loud? Maybe it was broken…

He drummed his fingers on his lap for a few moments before picking up his smart phone for the sixth time that half hour.

_~No new notifications~_

Maybe his phone was broken too…

Ray should have landed by now and he still hadn't called.

Why hadn't he called? He said he would call.

'_Chill out Kai. Maybe he got delayed going through security.. or maybe his phone died.. He wouldn't have had much entertainment just being on the plane by himself, so that's probably it.. Used all his battery playing that stupid candy crush game.. He'll call as soon as he can.. he promised..' _

Sighing through his nose, he lowered his phone back down to his lap, his thumb hovering over as he stared at the blank home screen.

What could he do to keep himself occupied for the time being?

~_Bleep_~

[T: Evening sexy, have a good time last night? ]

Kai clenched his jaw before shoving the phone face down on the arm of the sofa beside him.

Did this guy have a sixth sense or something?! Jeez!

He was not doing this right now. Nope. Wasn't even going to entertain it. No way José.

After dropping Ray off at the airport late that afternoon, on the tearful drive home, Kai had begun to have random flashbacks from the night previous.

Some were clear as day, some a total blur…

Tala..

He remembered seeing him in the restrooms come to think of it… He turned up after all.

Tyson was there with them at some point too, so, nothing could've happened.

Right?

..Still hadn't quite figured out what happened to his shirt though…

Opening up his silver laptop that was sat beside him he signed on to his Facebook page.

It was pointless Kai having a profile as he never posted anything.

He liked the occasional status and the odd funny cat video every so often but that was the extent of it really. He only had it in the first place because the Bladebreakers made him a profile many moons ago so they could all 'keep in touch.'

He idly scrolled down through his newsfeed.

..:: Tyson Granger: BLEURRGGHHHH… - 5hours ago.  
Hilary Tachibana + 5 others like this.

With a smirk he clicked to read the several comments underneath the status update.

He definitely remembered Tyson being absolutely smashed last night.

[Max Tate] : Just. Kill. Me.

[Hiro Granger] : #LIGHTWEIGHTS

[Hilary Tachibana] : LOL! Successful reunion boys? xo

[Tyson Granger] : If you define Kai Hiwatari giving me control of his credit card successful.. then it was pretty successful! :P

'_Fucks sake.. I _gave_ Tyson my credit card? Christ..'_

Making a mental note to check his bank balance at some point later Kai continued to read the comments. Maybe it'd spark more flashbacks?

[Hiro Granger] : Holy shit, how hammered was he?

[Max Tate] : LOL quite. Have you heard from the Chief yet Ty?

[Tyson Granger] : Nope. I think we've lost him. The way he was knocking back those shots? RIP Chief.

[Hilary Tachibana] : Shots?! Omg! You killed Kenny?! xo

[Daichi Sumeragi] : HEY WHERE WAS MY INVITE?!

-  
With nothing coming back to him and having lost complete interest of the back and forth once monkey boy had jumped in, Kai continued to scan through the drivel on his newsfeed.

Scrolling slightly faster at every pregnancy and engagement announcement he paused when his screen was suddenly filled with pink.

..:: Ray Kon was tagged in 2 photo's. ::..  
Mariah Wong: Just landed in Beijing! With Ray Kon + 3 others. 57minutes ago.

His mouth gaped slightly as he noticed the time stamp.

'_57 minutes ago?'_

He picked up his phone again.

~_No New Notifications_~

Immediately clicking on the first photo attached to the status update, the whole screen was filled with the entire white tiger team.

Mariah was at the centre of the photo sporting a cheesy grin and was holding out the peace sign with her free hand.

Lee was stood to the right of her with a dark coloured rucksack hung over his shoulder with a smile. Gary could be seen in the background holding Kevin under his arm, (who knew what was going on there.) And to her left was Ray, wearing his own beaming smile.

Kai's heart began to race as he firmly pressed on the second photo, it taking up the whole screen again.

There, clear as day, was Mariah, hanging off Ray's arm like a leech, placing a kiss upon his tanned cheek.

Ouch.

Kai's heart was pounding in his chest. He couldn't tear his eyes from what sat on his computer screen.

He'd lied to him. Straight up fucking lied to him.

Why did he make out that he was just going back home to visit his family when all along he was just wanting to get away and be with _HER?!_

Kai gritted his teeth and took in a few deep breaths to calm the burning rage that was brewing inside him.

Clenching his fists together he kept them squeezed tight to refrain himself from throwing the laptop across the room.

[T: Helloooo? U there? ]

Releasing his clenched fists the blood returned back to his white knuckles as he snatched up his phone. His fingers furiously pounded away at the keyboard.

[K: Not in the mood Tala. Leave me alone. ]

[T: Sheesh. U two fightin' again?]

[K: I said leave me alone.]

[T: Ookayy! Well if u need a shoulder to cry on I could always come round?]

[K: Do what you want. Doors open.]

With him now being deep set in a 'IDGAF' mood after seeing the love of his life with _that_, Kai decided to call Tala's bluff on his persistent flirtations.

He was obviously kidding – the guy's all fucking talk. He didn't truly think for a second the redhead would seriously appear considering how late into the evening it was - but all of 15 minutes later the front door opened.

He wasn't kidding.

Kai side glanced over to see him stood completely soaking wet in the hallway.

He looked the male up and down before dully questioning, "It's raining?"

Pulling his black hoodie over his head Tala then scowled over at the younger Russian.

"Nahh I just thought it'd be a great idea to jump in the shower fully clothed before coming over here.. Dickhead. Yes it's _fucking_ raining." He spat as he chucked his drenched hoodie on the floor.

Kai raised an eyebrow as a slight smirk tried to appear on his face at the wolf's misfortune before leaning forward to grab his drink on the table in front of him.

"Don't start with me Tala if you know what's good for you." He warned before taking a sip.

"Why, whatcha gonna do? Drown me with your tears? Too late, I'm already piss wet through because of _you_. Go get me a towel or something, come on." Tala snapped back as he pulled on the wet t-shirt currently sticking to his skin.

As Kai stood up from the sofa a smug tone laced his voice as he next spoke.

"You do know that no one actually asked you to come over here, right?"

Leisurely walking past the wet dog he made his way up the stairs for a towel and a change of clothes for him.

Tala didn't hesitate to slap Kai's ass as he passed and peered up the stairs to prolong the view.

"Yeah but we all know you wanted me to so don't try pretend that you didn't!" He teased calling up to him. "And here I am! Your knight in shining armour looking like a drowned rat for you!... You don't appreciate shit Hiwatari."

Returning back down the stairs a few moments later with the soft fluffy material Kai chucked the towel at Tala's head and carried the spare clothes into the living room placing them on the arm of the sofa.

"Calm down, witch of the west, you won't melt..." Kai retaliated.

The levels of sass currently in this household were off the scale.

"Suppose you'll want a drink or something too right?"

Tala roughly rubbed the towel over his hair to dry it off as he joined Kai in the living room.

"Yeah something strong. It's cold as fuck out there."

He then put up his hands with the towel being held in one of them. "I mean, if it ain't too much trouble for you princess, I know hospitality ain't your strong point."

Kai tutted as he left the living room.

If he wasn't careful he'd spit in this drink.

Making his way into the kitchen Kai took a glass tumbler from the cupboard and opened the freezer door to take out the ice cube tray from the top shelf. Popping out a few of the frozen cubes they clinked together as they made contact with the glass.

He paused for a moment.

Tala was in his house right now.

He'd just strolled through his front door like it was his own; he'd gotten him some clothes and was now making him a drink like it was just a regular occurrence.

Why did it all seem so weirdly normal?

Sure he'd had two drinks himself already. Wasting no time in becoming acquainted with the alcohol cabinet after seeing Ray all cosy with that tramp.

But his inhibitions weren't _that_ low.

Kai just shrugged it off, thankful for the distraction before walking back through into the living room.

Tala, who was a lot drier now having changed out of his wet attire into the clothes Kai had given him, was noseying at his laptop.

It was strange seeing him dressed in his stuff.

"Do you mind?" Kai bit as he picked up the vodka bottle on the floor and poured until the ice cubes were submerged before handing it to Tala.

"Nah, do you?" He taunted as he accepted the glass and watched Kai proceed to pick up his own drink back up from the table. "Surprised you're drinking again after last night.. You were pret-ty hammered.."

"Yeah well I've had a shit day." Kai muttered, brushing him off.

Tala chuckled a little, turning back to the look at the laptop screen.

"Yeah I can see that… who is she?" He asked referring to the photo Kai had left up.

"Like it matters.." Kai sneered as he brought the glass up to his mouth only to pause as Tala raised his hand out to him.

"Hey woah stop, we need to toast first."

With the glass to his lips Kai blinked and furrowed his brow.

"The hell is there to toast to?"

Tala glanced up to the right as he pondered for a moment.

A grin then appeared on his lips as he held out his glass towards the younger male. ".. to being warm and dry."

"You're an idiot." Kai shook his head and clinked his glass with Tala's to humour him.

"You love it," Tala said as he glanced at the screen again before closing it shut.

"Well she's got a good set of tits anyway whoever she is."

Kai exhaled a low growl before sitting back down on the couch.

Quickly making himself at home Tala placed his drink down on the floor and plopped down onto the large corner sofa two seats away from Kai with his arms spread out at either side of him.

"Nice place you got here." He said as he gazed around the living room.

"Mhm.." Kai hummed as he sipped on his drink.

'Cos this wasn't awkward.

Turning his head to his left at the French doors Tala's mischievous grin made another appearance as he continued to try and make conversation.

"Real nice backyard too. Bet a total legend did all that for you."

"What are you doing here Tala? _Seriously_?" Kai bit as he was growing tired of his constant banter.

Where was the off switch? He didn't understand how someone could play the joker all the damn time. Must be exhausting.

"Jeez can't a guy just come over and chill? Damn Kai and here I thought we were friends," Tala smirked as he picked up his drink again and looked back at Kai over his glass as he sipped.

Kai sent him a look.

"We all know '_friends'_ don't pull the shit you tried to last night."

After seeing Tala again in the flesh Kai had another flashback whilst he was upstairs grabbing him a towel.

He didn't know whether to feel irritated that Tala had taken advantage of him last night or embarrassed that he'd actually let him.

The redhead smiled.

"Ah you remembered then? Must've left a good impression," He smugly said as he placed his drink back down on the table in front of him.

Kai scoffed before sneering at him.

"Don't flatter yourself, I don't remember _that_ much.. Like you said I was trashed."

Tala's smile contorted back into his trademark smirk before he started to prowl towards him on all fours on the couch.

"Hm, well maybe I could refresh your memory?"

Kai's expression remained indifferent as he watched him venture towards him.

Contrary to last night where he was completely under his spell to the point he could barely hold his own in a simple exchange of back talk, he definitely felt a lot more in control of himself this evening.

He had only been sipping on his vodka after all with him still feeling a little delicate.

With Tala now completely in his space Kai shot him an unimpressed look to show the stalking wolf he wasn't fazed.

He wasn't going to make the same mistake twice and let someone with an ego like his know how much power he truly has.

Tilting his head towards him Kai looked into his eyes seeking nothing but the truth.

"Why are you really here Tala?" He questioned again, his voice down low.

He'd never admit it, but it kinda bothered Kai that he couldn't quite work this guy out.

For someone seemingly so open, jokey and carefree he still had this mysterious air about him.

Kai knew he had a girlfriend at home, so what was the deal with that?

Was he just as unhappy as he was in his relationship? Was Kai just one of many?

Tala had said before he was the only one but did he _really_ believe that now?

Why does he even care?!

As he was now close enough Tala gently cupped Kai's jawline and responded in a breathy whisper.

"I'm here because I just can't seem to stay away from you Kai.."

He stroked Kai's cheek with his thumb and parted his own lips.

Closing his eyes he moved in for a delicate kiss before Kai placed his index finger up onto his mouth.

Upon the contact Tala's eyes immediately shot back open.

"That shit might work on your girl but I'm not that easy." Kai flatly said.

Tala instantly sat back into the seat next to Kai and threw his head back in laughter.

"Aw c'mon wasn't that convincing though!" His laughter continued. "Aw man, you know you almost believed that, come on, DiCaprio hasn't got shit on me!"

Kai shook his head as he tried to stay indifferent but it was obvious he found the guy's cockiness amusing as a smile crept on his face.

He'd always usually distanced himself from the loud 'life of the party' characters.

He just couldn't stand the arrogance.

Why was Tala so different? Why was he so attracted to his energy? He was sorta like Tyson in a way.. except was insanely attractive, had a dark edge about him and had a fair few more brain cells.

Tala's eyes then suddenly brightened.

"Ahh! I know what I should have done! Ask me again, ask me why I'm here."

Kai frowned.

"Uh, no."

His expression simmered back to that of disinterest.

Did he really come across as the playful type? Didn't think so..

"Oh come on, you absolute grouch.." Tala groaned before taunting him, "Y'know this is probably why Ray decided to leave you for a slut.. just got sick of looking at your miserable face."

The wolf knew he was treading on thin ice with Kai's plain expression now transitioning to a glare in his direction.

Tala loved the fire that sat within those crimson eyes; however he loved winding him up more. It was just too easy.

Whilst Kai really didn't appreciate the dig right now maybe Tala was right? Maybe Ray had just had enough of his 'grouch' ways.

It did make sense. He was nothing like Mariah.

What did Ray even see in him? You don't just go from a bubbly, sickly sweet girl to.. him. It made perfect sense why he'd go back.

Kai exhaled.

".. why are you here.." he asked in a monotone.

Pleased that he finally decided to play along, Tala rid his short lived victory smile as he got back into character again.

Placing a hand on his chest he dramatically cleared his throat before reaching over to stroke Kai's cheek again with his thumb and look deep into his eyes.

".. I don't know Kai.. I.. I think I love you.." he softly said as he held his gaze before the sour look on Kai's face caused him to break into laughter again.

Kai was so done with his shit, he could tell.

"No? Wouldn't have believed that?" He asked as his laughter simmered back down.

Kai shook his head as he stared off at nothing.

"Not in the slightest.. You? Love?" He scoffed, "That's hilarious."

Tala cocked a brow as he questioned him, "You saying I'm incapable of love Hiwatari?"

Kai turned his attention to his nails as he bluntly responded, "Pretty sure if you were you wouldn't be sat on _my_ couch.. Where does she even think you are right now?"

With his elbow on the back of the sofa Tala rested his head on his hand, a smug expression now sat on his face.

"Well what does that say about _you_ then?"

"What? Answer my question." Kai snapped.

Tala waved his hand at him.

"Nahh this isn't about me.. I think me being here says a lot more about you than it does me."

Kai paused for a second before throwing a scowl.

"What about me?"

"Well you're the one that let me in." Tala stated.

"You let yourself in actually.." Kai corrected.

Tala scoffed.

"Whatever. I didn't see you telling me to get out though.. and you've _yet_ to tell me to leave.." He countered.

Kai gestured towards the door as he flatly replied, "Get out then."

Tala rolled his eyes with a sigh before a snicker escaped his throat.

"God you're exhausting."

"_I'm_ exhausting?" Kai pointed to himself.

"Yeah you are actually. Why can't you just admit that you want me to stay? You're bored of whatever you have with Ray and that's why you're allowing all of this."

"I'm not even doing anything!" Kai raised his voice in frustration.

Why does everyone think he's the bad guy all the time?!

"Whatever dude. Lie to me all you want but if you're gonna sit there and lie to yourself then I think you're even more fucked up than I am." Tala candidly said.

At least when asked he'd admit he was an asshole, this kid genuinely seemed to have no clue.

Kai turned his body on the couch to completely face him. Their eyes locking.

"Ok what am I doing? Tell me. What am I allowing?"

Tala then grabbed the back of Kai's neck and without warning pulled him in to a kiss, their lips instantly fitting perfectly together like two puzzle pieces, almost like they were meant for each other.

It was like déjà vu.

Tala wasted no time in completely inviting himself into Kai's mouth, their tongues passionately dancing briefly before Kai pushed him off of him and shot up from the couch.

"I think you should leave," Kai panted out as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

Tala immediately stood up also.

"You sure you want that?" He said before grabbing his head again and pulling him in close, their lips crashing together once more.

Kai automatically returned the kiss. He couldn't help it. Tala was like a drug to him, one look, one touch and he was high on desire in an instant.

It was Tala that then broke off their kiss. He was serious yet confident as he next spoke.

"If you want me to go Kai I'll go, just say the word."

Kai's breaths were shallow and his lips stayed parted as Tala abruptly broke away from him. His eyes immediately transfixed on the redhead's lips, desperate for the contact again.

".. Just, one more," was his breathy demand as he took a fistful of his shirt to pull Tala back in again.

Tala smirked into the kiss as he followed Kai's lead. Letting him dominate the kiss, his hands began to wander underneath Kai's shirt which caused to shorter male to see sense and break off from him.

"Right, go." Kai firmly said as he caught his breath back and straightened up his shirt.

"Alright." Tala calmly said with a smile as he picked up his glass to down the rest of his drink.

Placing the empty tumbler down on the coffee table he gestured towards himself.

"What about your clothes?"

"Just keep 'em, it's fine." Kai quickly answered, flustered.

Tala gave him a nod.

"Mmkay."

He slowly strolled past him heading in the direction of the front door before turning on his heel and coming up behind him.

Wrapping his arms around Kai's stomach Tala's husky voice teased his eardrum.

"You _really_ sure you want me to leave Kai?"

_God_ he loved how he said his name.

No, he wasn't sure at all.

It was clear Tala wanted to stay and it was also apparently clear that Kai didn't really want him to leave.

Feeling his hot breath against his neck caused Kai to melt into him and instantly tilt his head to expose more of his ivory skin.

Tala took both this and his silence as a secure go ahead to continue.

His hands began to wander up the front of Kai's shirt again, his fingers caressing his toned stomach, delicately feeling each line along his perfect physique as he nuzzled his neck with delicate kisses.

Kai urged himself to retract from the wolf. His inner conscience was screaming at him to resist but he let his eyes flutter shut and enjoy the electricity prickle his skin with every single touch.

Tala slipped a hand into his sweatpants and began to explore into Kai's boxer shorts. The firm grip on his throbbing cock instantly caused Kai's eyes to shoot open and moan out in anticipation.

The sexual chemistry, the fire between the two of them was mind blowing.

Tala seemed to know how to turn on every single one of Kai's switches to the point trying to get in reverse gear was just impossible.

With Tala now pumping him away, Kai gripped hold of the redhead's thighs to steady his weakening knees, he bit his lip to soften the moans escaping his throat.

"Admit it Kai. I can read your body better than he can." His voice was low, almost deadly, "I can tell how fast your hearts pounding, I can see you shiver every time I say your name." He flicked his tongue all the way up his neck, stopping to whisper into his ear.

"I know how much you want me to kiss and suck every inch of you.. You're so used to being in control you just can't get enough of the feeling of having none.. being completely dominated.. Am I right, _Kai?_"

Kai couldn't take it anymore.

Feeling Tala's tongue on his neck. His warm breath in his ear – what little resistance he had left was crumbling.

He couldn't fight this. Tala's very scent was flooding his senses to the point that the part of his brain that dealt with morals, dignity and common sense had entirely shut down, his raw animal-self taking completely over.

"U-Upstairs." Kai's voice shook with desperation.

Gripping hold of Tala's hand he pulled it out from his pants before turning to face him. His voice transitioning to a firm command.

"Upstairs. Now."


	7. Broken Promises

**A/N**: 'Ello from the U.K!

I'm home - finished living my best life in the Carribbean and everything's now back to normal.

Took me a little longer than usual to update as for some reason I just really struggled with this one and its content.

B.B can tell you herself the countless hours she's had to listen to me on the phone ranting about "Chapter 'f-ing' 7", so I'm not even going to lie when I say I'll be glad to see the back of this damn chapter. xD

Also for those that don't know yet, the Smut Queen herself Lux, very kindly wrote us a little something of the events between Kai and Tala that occurred after Chapter 6. *wiggles eyebrows* a little behind the scenes if you will.. because a prude I am far from, however I can not write lemons to save my life xD

It's on Ao3 and is called "Fire and Ice" - by LuxahHeart. Go find it. Go read it. It's beautiful. Thank you again Lux, you honestly don't know how much it made my da- **LIFE**.

As always thank you to everyone following and reviewing. Hope you like this one and the struggle was worth it.

* * *

Chapter 7. Broken Promises

"I should get going…"

Ray now stared down at the floor as he spoke. Seeing Kai's deflated expression before him was heart breaking and he couldn't bring himself to keep gazing into the dull ruby eyes that were staring back at him.

"Call me as soon as you land, yeah?"

Kai's voice seemed unsure as he quietly spoke.

Ray had already said that he would call him but it was almost as if he held a tone of doubt. Like he thought that as soon as he left Kai would just be out of sight out of mind.

This wasn't exactly easy for him either. Of course he'd call; he really didn't have to worry about that.

Ray nodded in response, and wrapped his arms around Kai's neck.

"I will, I promise… I love you Kai." He softly said, breathing in his cologne.

There was a brief pause before the hold against Ray's lower back tightened.

"I love you too Ray.."

Walking away from Kai was tough, and it was an internal battle for him on whether to turn around and take a final look at him or to just keep on walking through to the airport security.

He was so used to taking this journey through an airport with his beau alongside him. It felt strange to not be holding his hand; leaving him behind.

Still with a slow and steady pace he decided to look over his shoulder and turn to face him, but a feeling of regret immediately washed over him as he did so.

Kai hadn't moved from where they were once stood in their embrace and he was holding his right arm with his left crossed over his chest, almost like he didn't really know what to do with himself now. He just looked lost.

Kai's eyes appeared to be glistening too, a little more than usual Ray noticed.

It almost seemed like he was tearing up? Though it was probably just the bright lights reflecting off the floor.

Meandering slowly backwards Ray took in a deep breath to try and suppress the overwhelming urge to say 'to hell with all this' and run back over to him.

During the several years he had known him he could count on one hand the amount of times he'd seen the Russian cry. Not wanting to add to that number he chose to remain in denial and swallowed hard before waving over to him with a light smile, so faint that with the distance between them it was completely unseen.

Though he'd desperately tried to hold it in, seeing Ray wave goodbye was the final nail in the coffin that caused a single tear to roll down Kai's cheek.

He meekly lifted a hand up to reciprocate the farewell before bringing his arms back in tighter around himself to try and rid the overwhelming vulnerability he was currently feeling.

Ray then turned on his heel to face the direction he was walking in and began to make his way through to the security area, blissfully unaware of the silent sobs now emitting from Kai who too had turned away, avoiding any eye contact as he made his way back to his car.

Placing his duffle bag on the short conveyer belt to be scanned, the whole process afterwards was a blur as Ray went onto autopilot.

He'd gone through this procedure a thousand times over whilst travelling with the Bladebreakers all around the world for tournaments, and before he'd even met them too on his own solo ventures.

After a brief pat down after some loose change in his pocket set off the metal detector, he finally made his way through the security and into the departures lounge.

Ray found this part so boring. The aimless wandering around all the stores, wasting time before flights.

He wouldn't have it any other way though, as the way he saw it, he had however many hours on the plane to just sit, so he'd might as well stretch out his legs while he could.

The spotless, gleaming white floor tiles, the overpriced food and drink, luggage all over the place, a mix of both excited and frustrated expressions…

He could have been anywhere in the world, the hustle and bustle that was an airport was just all the same to him now.

Ray remembered how much of a buzz he used to get from travelling in his younger years, but now he just found the whole thing tedious.

He had it in his head that once he'd retired from blading he could finally be settled. Finally have somewhere that felt like home and could just have the one annual trip like a normal person for some R+R.

But instead he was now waiting to board a plane to go back to where he started out in the first place.

The White Tiger Village.

Slight resentment sat within him as he vacantly looked over a pair of designer sunglasses that he wouldn't ever be able to afford.

He wasn't blaming Kai or anything. Well. Maybe a little.

But if he was completely honest with himself, now that he was alone with his thoughts, it wasn't just solely due to Kai's actions why he wanted to venture back home.

Ray had tried to convince him that the space would do them both good and surprisingly Kai had seemed to actually believe him. He must have really put on a convincing performance because Ray didn't even believe his own words; not entirely anyway.

Truth be told he wasn't going away thinking space would fix their relationship.. he was going away to truly see for himself if the feelings that had returned to him recently were-

-"RAYY!"

A bright female voice called out causing him to automatically turn his head to find the source. His eyes transfixed immediately on a long wave of pink hair bounding towards him, her arms were held out wide in front of her as she ran.

Ray smiled flashing his fangs as he recognised the familiar face. He placed the sunglasses back on the rack and began walking towards her, holding out his arms for her to run into his embrace.

With Mariah's arms connecting around his neck Ray wrapped his arms around her waist and playfully spun her round in a circle.

"Hah! Hey you!" He laughed out as he put her down and looked over her to see the rest of the white tiger team walking to join them.

"Glad you decided to join us Ray," Lee said with a smile once he'd joined them. "Just like old times ey?"

Ray nodded, "Yeah, it's crazy how things pan out.." He returned the smile but his voice was tainted with a touch of sadness.

_**12 Hours ago.**_

[R: Well he's still not come home yet..]

[M: Srsly?! It's 3am! U deserve so much better than this babe u know that right? I hate seeing him treat u like this! It makes me so mad! xo]

Ray was laid in bed curled up on his side, the bedroom captured in complete darkness apart from the phone screen's soft glow illuminating his tired facial features. He slowly tapped back a reply as he held the device in both hands.

[R: It's not always like this..]

After a quick online search Mariah was sat upright in her bed now, the bedside light switched on. Steam practically pouring from her ears as her fingers furiously pounded away at her phone's keyboard.

[M: Buy the ticket Ray. I've just checked + there are still seats available on our evening flight. Did u ask work for the time off? xo]

[R: Yeah, they granted it a few days ago.]

[M: Great! :D did u tell Kai? xo]

[R: No, not yet.. I've not really spoken to him..]

Ray wasn't going to delve into a huge amount of detail with her as to why, but he hadn't spoken to Kai simply because he had been staying at a hotel for the past few nights due to an argument over _that_ photo that _she_ sent.

He wasn't exactly mad at her for sending it.. Hell, he'd never reject a boob pic.

He just wished Kai hadn't have seen it cos now he was suspicious of the two of them..

And rightly so...

[M: Keep it that way. Book the flight! xo]

[R: I don't know.. I feel like I should use this time off work to maybe spend some time with him? Might makes things better no?]

[M: Ur home now + where is he? - OUT. He doesn't care whether ur there or not Ray. Book the flight. Let's all just go home for a little while! It'll do u good baby trust me when I say this! xo]

* * *

x-x-x

After 2 hours of moseying around the shops and having some extortionately priced food the White Tiger team all began to make their way to the gate to board the plane for China.

Once they got on board and were directed to their seats by one of the overly chirpy air hostess's, Ray, who had led the pack, looked back over his shoulder to Mariah as he walked down the centre of the plane.

"Do you want to sit by the window, in the middle or the aisle 'Riah?"

Mariah's eyes twinkled.

She loved it when he called her that. Especially because he was the only one who did and had done ever since they were children.

"Aw still a gentleman I see! Window seat please!" She responded with a spoilt princess air about her.

Letting Mariah past him to shuffle along the seats, Ray then gestured for Lee, who had been walking behind her, to take the next seat in the middle.

"Go ahead Lee-"

"-No no! Lee _you_ sit on the end, Ray you sit here next to me." She patted on the empty seat next to her as she blurted out the order.

Lee tutted before taking a step back again and the two Chinese males shared a silent look accompanied with an innocent smile, their thoughts clear as day.

'_Anything for a quiet life.'_

Ray shuffled along to the middle seat and stuffed his bag underneath the chair in front of him. He kinda wanted the aisle seat to be able to stretch out his legs when no one was passing by but the flight to China wasn't that long he supposed so he could deal with it.

Once Ray got seated Lee was then able to finally sit down on the aisle seat next to him, and both Gary and Kevin sat down in the row behind them.

After around twenty minutes all the passengers were seated and with the cabin crew having gone through all of the safety procedures that no one ever really takes much notice of, the airplane's engine fired up and after a few words from the captain prepared for take-off.

As the plane began to speed down the runway Mariah instantly took a hold of Ray's hand and gripped it tight.

He glanced over to her to see that her eyes were currently screwed shut.

She'd always been a nervous flyer. He thought she'd be used to it by now having travelled around the world for all the tournaments they competed in but apparently not.

Rubbing his thumb against her hand he leaned over to her and softly spoke in her ear, "It's okay 'Riah, I'm here."

Mariah's stomach fluttered, and it wasn't solely from the nerves.

Prizing a single eye open she quickly took a glimpse at him and sweetly smiled before giving him a nod and mouthing a 'Thank you.'

* * *

x-x-x

The sound of the pilot coming over the speakers stirred Ray from his slumber.

He remembered starting to watch a movie but the screen on the seat in front of him had gone onto standby mode. He must have dozed off half way through.

Groggily peering round to take in his surroundings he shifted in his seat wanting to sit upright properly as he had slouched down in his sleep but felt a weight on his shoulder that stopped him.

Mariah must've dozed off too.

Having completely woken up now he realised the arm rest that originally separated them had been moved up, out of the way, and she was completely leaning over, snuggled into his arm with her head on his shoulder. He wondered how long they'd been like that for.

So close.

Ray softly smiled at her peaceful looking form and couldn't help but breathe in the familiar scent of her hair.

She was still using the same shampoo. He'd always loved the smell of it. Tropical something or other. He couldn't remember the name of it but it was citrusy.

He gingerly tried to gather up his belongings from the seat pocket in front, aware that they were due to land soon but not wanting to disturb her just yet. Three hours may have passed already but the journey back to the village wasn't over by a long shot, and they could do with all the sleep they could get.

Feeling the slight shift underneath her caused Mariah's golden eyes to slowly flutter open.

An exaggerated yawn escaped her throat as she eased herself off of Ray and stretched out her arms.

"Gosh how long was I out for?" she said to no one in particular, rubbing her eyes.

At the movement in his peripheral vision, Lee glanced to his left and took out his headphones noticing both sleeping beauties had now woken up.

"Oh nice of you two to finally join us!" He sarcastically said, "Been great talkin' to you both."

"Pfft. We can't help it if you're boring Lee and you send us all to sleep." Mariah said sticking out her tongue.

Ray chuckled as he sat between the two squabbling siblings and with her weight now completely off him he stretched out his arms before starting to properly get his things together.

Feeling around the seat pocket he retrieved his iPod and the packet of skittles he'd bought in the airport. He frowned as he continued to search around. He could've sworn he'd had his phone in there too.

"You okay Ray?" Mariah asked tilting her head, noticing he was starting to look a little uneasy.

"Yeah I just don't know what I did with my phone.." he quietly responded as he started to empty out the brochures and safety pamphlets from the pocket, getting slightly flustered.

"Pretty sure I saw you put it in your bag earlier," she said as she gestured towards the duffle bag by his feet.

"Did I? Oh, that's fine then.."

He didn't remember putting it in his bag but if she said she saw him then he must have done.. it definitely wasn't in this pocket though so he started to put everything back.

After 15 minutes the plane prepared to land and after another bout of fear for Mariah and the loss of circulation to Ray's hand, the wheels finally touched the tarmac runway and the plane came to a standstill.

After retrieving all of their belongings the group started to make their way off the plane when Mariah took out her phone.

"Hey let's take a photo guys! Huddle in!"

As Mariah lifted up her phone to take the selfie the white tiger team got closer to her to be in the photo. With wide grins all round she threw the peace sign before taking the picture. "Cheese!"

Looking down at her screen to check the photo Mariah smiled before clicking back onto her camera.

"Ray, take another one with me!"

Lifting up the phone once more with just her and Ray in the shot, she turned to face him and puckered her lips onto his cheek whilst Ray looked into the camera with a fanged smile.

Hearing the camera shutter noise once more she looked at the photo before she squealed in delight.

"Love it! Oh we're gonna all have so much fun!"

As they all walked through the airport to the main baggage collection Mariah logged into her Facebook page and attached the two photos to her check in.

..:: Just landed in Beijing! ::..

Attaching Ray, Lee, Gary and Kevin to the status she firmly pressed the 'post' button with a mischievous expression painted on her face.

'_See how you like that Kai..'_

* * *

x-x-x

The coach trip back to the village was a long one.

Ray had forgotten just how far out into the wilderness his former settlement was. The street lights becoming further and further apart from each other as the city of Beijing was being left behind them as they made their way into the mountains.

He loved the scenery here. Being able to see the millions of stars clearly up in the night sky due to the zero light pollution. It was so pretty. He'd have to bring Kai here sometime..

KAI!

Ray suddenly gasped and his eyes simultaneously widened at the realisation he hadn't gotten in contact with him yet. They'd been on this bus for at least an hour now already. He needed his phone! Now!

Mariah jumped at the unexpected noise from him, her eyes now mimicking his, wide with worry.

"What's wrong Ray? Did you forget something?"

Ray shook his head, "No no I just need my phone, I need to get in touch with Kai and let him know we landed safely." He quickly said eyeing his duffle bag that sat up on the metal shelving above the seats.

Mariah tutted.

"Can't it wait until we get there?" She whined glancing down at her watch. "He'll probably be asleep now anyway! I wouldn't worry about it." She waved her hand brushing him off.

Ray pressed his lips together and slowly nodded.

Knowing Kai though he wouldn't have just gone to sleep, he'd have stayed up until he got confirmation he was there. But he knows what it's like to travel. It's hectic. He'd understand. As soon as they got to the village he'd text him.

Another hour had passed and the bus had finally pulled up to the edge of a forest, a steep dirt track could be seen winding through the trees. They'd have to walk the final half a mile journey from here.

Grabbing all their belongings once again the group hopped off the bus and began to head into the darkness.

It was almost midnight now and the only light source were the hundreds of stars scattered across the night sky. Being this deep in the forest with no aid would have been a dangerous venture to anyone else, but for the white tiger clan their feline attributes came into play and they could see the track ahead like it was the middle of the day.

They were all chatting amongst themselves to pass the time, almost salivating at the talk of the feast that would be waiting for them upon their arrival into the village. The elders had a huge banquet prepared to welcome home their sacred beast's leader Ray, who hadn't been back since the last championships several years ago.

Ray however wasn't joining in on the conversation and seemed to be in his own little bubble paying no attention to the chit-chat that surrounded him.

He was walking slightly ahead of the others, his pace just a touch quicker as he couldn't wait to unpack all his things, find his phone, and finally let Kai now he was alive.

With the time difference it would be almost 1am in Japan. Knowing Kai would probably be really worrying by now a pang of guilt shot in his stomach.

He'd landed over 3 hours ago now and Kai was none the wiser.

As they all continued to stroll deeper into the dense forest, after what felt like a never ending journey, the trees slowly but surely began to thin out and very faint specks of light could be seen flickering through the openings. A foreigner might very well have described them to be cat's eyes, peeping through, twinkling and enticing.

However they weren't cat's eyes at all.

With them reaching the glade they had finally made it to the village and hundreds of lanterns in various sizes were all lit, illuminating the entire settlement in a glorious array of light.

Ray's eyes glistened, and his lips slowly parted as he took in the sheer beauty of it all. The village hadn't changed at all.

He was home.

"Master Tao!"

Ray was brought back to the present as Mariah pushed past him after dropping her bags on the ground and ran to embrace the ex team coach. He stood resting on his cane outside the main hut where the villagers ate, held council meetings, and hosted events.

Tao was in his nineties now and age had finally caught up with wise man with him seemingly being a lot frailer than Ray had originally remembered him.

Upon the warm greeting from Mariah, Tao chuckled, "Just drop all your things in your rooms young ones and then come straight for dinner, you must all be famished!"

The group nodded, grabbed a lantern each along with their bags and proceeded to split off and head to their cabins.

Ray opened the wooden door of his hut with a slight creak and peered inside, the flicker from the lantern lighting up the room.

Nothing had changed here either.

It was basic but it was what he had always been accustomed to: A bed with a small table, a single wardrobe, and a writing desk.

Dropping his suitcase on the floor he placed his duffle bag on to the bed and quickly started to rummage through it.

Several minutes later there was a firm knock on his cabin door before it was pushed open, Mariah sternly spoke out to him immediately as she entered, "What are you doing Ray? We're all waiting for you, we're starving here!"

Ray had emptied the entire contents of his duffle bag out onto his bed and was now sat on the floor frantically pulling clothes out from his suitcase.

"I can't find my phone Mariah, where did you say I put it?" He saved her a glance as he quickly responded.

Mariah swallowed before she quickly growled out, "Ray! Do all of this later, come on! The Elders are waiting for us!"

With a frustrated sigh Ray turned to face her and eased himself up, his expression was filled with worry and his gaze was low.

"Ok let's go.." he muttered out. The sooner he got dinner out of the way the sooner he could search again.

Mariah's own expression softened, "It'll turn up Ray don't worry, we'll find it after dinner okay?"

Ray just nodded.

Mariah then turned to walk out but then frowned and turned back to face him, "You think he's going to be mad with you if you don't message him right away? The whole point of this trip Ray was to have some space, away from him, not still pander to him and obey his every order."

"I don't pander to him!" Ray defended.

She scoffed.

"Please, you've been acting like some trapped house wife who needs to report back to her sugar daddy after every move she makes."

"I have _not_." He bit. "Do _you_ not always let me know that you've got somewhere safe after a flight?"

Mariah bit the inside her cheek and looked away from him. Sure she did but that's because she knew Ray actually cared, Kai however did not.

"Exactly." Ray took in a deep breath and exhaled. He was starting to feel a little tired now.

"Just one text, that's all I need to send. Just one text to let him know that I'm here, and I'm okay.." He scanned over his belongings that were scattered all over the room now.

Where the fuck was his phone?!

Mariah groaned before gesturing to the door, "Well let's quickly go use mine then!"

Ray blinked before sheepishly pressing his lips together, his gaze dropping off to the side.

Mariah's eyes narrowed, she figured he'd have made a rush for the door at her brilliant idea.

"What?"

"Kai.. doesn't uh, know that I came here with you guys.. He just thinks I came alone.."

Ray almost cringed at his own words as they left a bitter taste on his tongue. It wasn't like him to lie but just telling Kai he was leaving was bad enough, never mind that it was with his old team… with Mariah.

Mariah's eyes widened. She actually looked somewhat impressed with him as a faint smirk began to appear on her lips. She knew it wasn't great between them, but this shady behaviour from Ray seemed quite promising.

"Oh.."

"Yeah.. I kinda feel bad for lying about it now but-"

"-You've not lied you just, haven't told the _entire_ truth, which isn't always a bad thing Ray." She interrupted him with a smile as she tried to quickly diminish his feelings of guilt. He had no reason to feel bad about any of this. If Kai acted like a decent boyfriend in the first place Ray wouldn't have wanted to leave.

Ray simply shrugged.

Mariah stared back at him. She didn't understand why he looked so defeated. Ray had left for a reason. She had hoped she was that reason but how he was acting over not being able to get in contact with Kai she wasn't too sure now.

She sighed, "Have you checked all your pockets?"

Ray glanced up at her.

"Yeah.." he said as he patted himself again to triple check that his phone definitely wasn't on him.

Folding her arms her tone transitioned to a fake scold, "You didn't leave it on the plane did you Ray? Did it fall on the floor?"

Ray groaned, "I really hope not."

His stomach then growled.

Mariah tutted with a smirk before opening the door for him and pointing outside, "We'll look after, come on let's go eat!"

Ray lightly nodded with a smile. "He probably would have dozed off by now anyway I guess.." He said referring to Kai as he went to pick up the lantern he'd placed on the bedside table.

Mariah rolled her eyes. Why was he still talking about him?!

"And even if he was awake Ray, he'd just have his face in a spreadsheet or something 'cos he only cares about work and himself," she bit out.

Ray shook his head as he started to make his way out of the cabin.

"That's not true Mariah, stop it."

'_Though it does feel that way sometimes..'_

"Do you _promise_ that once you've got in contact with him you'll stop bringing him up?" She tried to sound less harsh with her tone but how were they gonna have fun together if _he_ was always the topic of conversation?

Ray could tell she was getting tired of him. Mariah had never kept it a secret that she couldn't stand Kai. Ever since the world championships in Russia she'd always deemed him a 'rotten one.'

What he did was pretty shitty but that was years ago, he's grown up a lot since then.

Ray took an exaggerated bow before he walked past her and out the hut.

"I _promise_, okay? Let's go eat, I'm starving."

Mariah tried to suppress her smile as she caught his own smirk as he bowed down to her.

Catching his scent as he passed her caused her head to instantly turn in his direction like a magnet. Her eyes held a twinkle as she looked him up and down as he walked away from her.

Noticing she hadn't followed him Ray paused to look over his shoulder.

"You coming 'Riah?"

"Mhm!" She nodded with a smile before closing the door and skipping to catch up with him.

x-x-x

**_Several hours ago_.**

They'd only been in the air for around 45 minutes but for Mariah it felt like days.

All of these movies sucked and all she could see out of the window were clouds.

Taking a bored glance over to see what Ray was watching on his T.V screen Mariah then took a quick side glance at him to notice the movie was just playing to itself as he'd dozed off in his seat.

With him being blissfully unaware she shuffled in her seat to turn herself more to face him and took full advantage of the sight before her.

'_He's so dreamy..'_

Her eyes sparkled as she admired each of his sleeping features.

His hair was just to die for; and he'd always had really good eyebrows for a guy... and he did _not_ deserve those lashes.. his lips.. ugh, his lips.

Mariah's stare paused on his mouth as she fantasised of all the times her lips had pressed against them, and the gorgeous smile that stayed hidden underneath.

His jawline, his shoulders, his arms.. God he was so **manly-**

Her eyes then traced down to his hands which were loosely holding on to his cell phone. Leaning forward she slowly took it out of his hands.

Lee then took a glance over and frowned at her before mouthing, "What are you doing?"

Mariah sneered a "nothing" at him before placing the phone in Ray's seat pocket in front of him and throwing Lee her tongue before folding her arms and staring out the window again.

She was just doing the guy a favour, God, he'd have dropped it otherwise with him being asleep.

After a few minutes her eyes slowly trailed back to the front pocket. Shifting in her seat again they then trailed back to Lee, who was back focused on his movie, to then trail back to Ray who was still asleep, to then trail back to the seat pocket.

With curiosity getting the better of her she waited until Lee turned around to threaten Kevin after kicking his chair again before she quickly grabbed Ray's phone from the pocket.

She clicked on the menu button and the device came to life, a photo of the entire Bladebreakers team was the screen saver. They were all dressed fairly nice - must've been some occasion or something.

Kai's arm rested on Ray's shoulders and he was pulling him in towards him, whilst Ray's hand sat on Kai's chest. She always had Kai down as a possessive type.

'_Ew.' _

_~ Kai: 3 new messages.~ _

The new text notification sat on the screen also.

She needed to know what they said.

She took another glance at Ray to ensure that he was still sleeping.

Taking the phone she lightly placed it underneath Ray's limp thumb, the finger recognition immediately registering his print unlocking the phone.

She couldn't really believe what she was doing right now. This was such an invasion of privacy but if she could protect Ray from the nasty messages that Kai had probably sent to him then she was going to do just that damn it!

She clicked on the messages reading each one.

[K: I miss you already..]

[K: Don't forget to let me know as soon as you land.]

[K: I love you.]

Well.. that wasn't what she was expecting. But still. Possessive much! Giving Ray orders – Oh 'as _**soon**_ as you land!' Who does he think he is?!

Mariah turned her head again to check on Ray before she deleted all three messages with a brisk swipe of her thumb.

Ray didn't need to see those. He came to have a good time. Not to still feel he owed this guy something.

It was then that Ray started to stir a little.

With his phone still in her hand she quickly turned it off and in her panic shoved it in her own hand luggage down by her feet.

Pushing the bag further under the chair in front of her with her foot, she lifted up the arm rest that originally separated her and Ray and softly leaned against him, settling him almost instantly as he snuggled into her warmth.

Breathing in his scent it instantly calmed her racing heart, a smile sitting on her face as she rested her head onto his shoulder and closed her eyes.

'_You're not going to come between us anymore Kai.. Ray is __**MINE**__.'_


	8. Regrets

A/N: Here it is! The morning after with my two little deviants. God I love these two boys so much.

Anyways, if you've not read it yet, I highly, **highly** recommend you hop onto archiveofourown and read Luxahheart's "Fire and Ice" as I am 100% claiming it as my own chapter 6.5 (She won't mind, she loves me, don't ya Luxy? xD) It showcases their evening in a little more _detail_ shall we say. It's not 100% necessary for the chapter (though I do take some quotes from it) but.. no actually, **all** lemons are necessary, go read it.

As always many thanks for the reviews, and to all you secret readers! (Lookin' at you 20years, k_üsse!_ xD)

* * *

Chapter 8. Regrets

"_U-Upstairs." Kai's voice shook with desperation before he turned to face Tala, his voice transitioning to a firm command. _

"_Upstairs. Now."_

* * *

Crimson eyes slowly flickered open as the morning sun poured through the bedroom window.

Kai had always been an early riser. More often than not he was up before the sun itself, so seeing the turquoise coloured room so late in the morning, in this bright light, was beyond unusual for him.

Rubbing his eyes ridding them of last night's sleep, his hazy vision cleared momentarily as he squint up at the ceiling.

Internally cursing the brightness he winced as he screwed his eyes back shut and covered his face with a forearm.

Taking in a deep breath he sighed deeply as he felt a raging headache coming on.

'_NEVER... drinking again... Fuck. My. Life...'  
_  
Having heavily binged for two nights straight now he felt like death warmed up. It had been a good while since he had drank like that on consecutive days, his body no longer being able to tolerate it like he used to.

He was so weak.

Thinking about it, his whole body just ached.

Still with an arm over his eyes, shielding them from the blinding beams, Kai prized open an eye and took a quick peek at the digital clock on his bedside table.

10:45am.

A low groan escaped his throat at the slight disappointment in himself and his laziness. Even when he was sick he'd never stay in bed this late.

There was no way he was going to make it into work today though. He wasn't even sure if he could bring himself to open the door of his home office. The mere thought of sitting at a computer right now, staring at that screen made him want to hurl.

Nope, there was no way this was going to be a productive day. It'd just be a day of wallowing in self-pity knowing that Ray wanted to be with that pink haired tramp over him. He saw the photos. Saw how happy he looked. It was obvious. Oh and to top it all off, he _still_ hadn't got in contact since his flight, so that just said it all.

Well... he hadn't actually checked his phone since last night so he might have gotten in touch by now but he probably hadn't because he hates him so **whatever**.

Last night..

Rolling over on to his side Kai groggily pulled the bed covers up to his face with his eyes still glued shut in an attempt to block the sun's relentless rays.

Drifting back in and out of sleep, his mind wandered, his thoughts tracing back to the dream he'd had last night.

Tala had come over, and it had been raining – hard.

His wet clothes were clinging to his toned body, with his white shirt now practically see-through.

God he looked so hot.

He remembered grabbing him a towel and a change of clothes from upstairs, then went into the kitchen to get him a hard drink to warm him up.

By the time he got back to the living room Tala was wearing one of his shirts. Just an old black band tee. It fit him well considering the redhead wasn't as broad in the shoulders as he was. The extra height on him evened it out.

It looked good on him.

It also looked good on his bedroom floor.

Everything was so vivid yet unclear at the same time. He'd had many a dirty dream before but for Kai this was a whole new level of wild imagination that made him question if it was even a dream at all.

Horny bastard he was.

He must have sent Tala home at some point before that though, before it all got out of hand, because his next recollections were definitely that of a rated M nature.

Contrary to their first meeting since Tala had finished the work in their yard, it was Kai in the driver's seat, taking back control. The small amount of liquor he'd been sipping on earlier in the evening reminding him that he was 'Kai fucking Hiwatari.'

'_Either get out, or get up those stairs. I won't repeat myself.'_

Kai's lips twitched slightly as he dozed, the small smirk slowly appearing on his lips after envisioning the look on Tala's face again upon hearing his demanding words.

It was priceless. Oh how the tables had turned.

Scenes of the two drinking straight from the bottle at some point then played back which would explain his headache.

Whose bright idea was that again?

His brows then furrowed in his slumber. The uncomfortable sensation of carpet fibres rubbing against his bare skin coming back to him.

Were they on the floor?

Had he lost the control?

Yes.

But he had wanted to. For once in his life he didn't want to be the one in charge.

'_Fuck me.'_

Kai couldn't say for sure how many rounds the two had endured. The liquor in his system royally affecting the timeline of events, blurring the line between reality and fantasy.

Pain, pleasure, pain, pleasure.

Licking, sucking, biting.

It was all so clear.

The smell of vodka on Tala's breath as he told him all that he was going to do to him.

Sharp nails sinking into delicate flesh and being dragged along causing angry red lines. The warmth of his bare chest pressed against his as he pinned him down on the bed, and the tight grip he held on his wrists as he restrained his arms by either side of his head.

He could almost hear himself moan out Tala's name again as he took him whole in his mouth and how amazing it felt having the very life fucked out of him shortly afterwards.

It was then that Kai heard a soft sleepy sigh and sensed movement beside him.

His eyes shot open, so fast it almost hurt.

Tala was right beside him.

None of it was a dream.

Fuck.

Laid on his back with his left arm up behind his head and his right resting on his bare toned stomach, Tala's chest slowly rose up and down with every breath he took. The bed sheets barely covering him from the waist down with his head tilted away from him so that every mark that had been left on his neck was clearly visible.

Had he really been that animalistic? Kai hadn't given anyone a hickey since, well, ever.

His heart then skipped a beat, his hand slowly creeping up to touch his own neck.

If he had done that to Tala… What had _he_ done to him?

With realisation setting in that the 'dream' was in fact all real, the answer was obvious – a lot.

A sickening pang of guilt hit his stomach like a kick to the gut.

'_W-What have I done...'_

Kai slowly eased himself up, the ache in his muscles causing him to grit his teeth as he attempted to creep out of the bed without causing too much movement to the mattress.

He wasn't really sure why he didn't want to disturb the sleeping wolf. It was his fucking house and Tala would have to leave at some point. But he'd seen it in movies and figured that's just what you did after a one night stand.

He then caught a glimpse of the picture of him and Ray on his nightstand before quickly looking away like the very sight of it had burned his eyes.

He couldn't face him right now, not even in a photo frame.

He'd felt an asshole on many occasion during the course of his life but this, this moment definitely topped them all.

Another sleepy sigh then emitted from the redhead's throat as his eyes slowly peeled open.

Taking in his surroundings, half open blue eyes then met Kai's bare back who had managed to only get halfway off the bed.

A small smirk made its way to the corner of his mouth as he admired his artwork. The evidence of their night of passion proudly displayed on his skin for all to see.

He then stretched out his whole body and exaggerated a loud yawn.

"Morning princess," He sighed out with hint of amusement in his voice, "Where ya goin'?"

Kai instantly tensed and mentally cursed him.

More thing in common.. Light sleeper.. Figures.

"You need to leave." He spat before immediately sitting himself upright on the edge of the bed, knowing he didn't have to sneak around anymore.

With the sheets no longer covering him, his eyes trailed to the matching grazes on both his knees.

Damn carpet..

Catching his boxer shorts on the floor in his peripheral vision, Kai quickly grabbed them and shoved them on to try and regain some form of dignity before sitting back down on the bed.

He was sure Tala had seen enough of him in the past 48 hours to last him a lifetime.

Rolling on to his side to face him, Tala rested his head on his hand with his smirk only growing as he caught a quick glimpse of Kai's ass again.

It was a really nice ass.

"What, before breakfast? Surely that's the least you could offer me considering how good you got it last night." He said smugly, now looking over his nails on his free hand.

Kai clenched his jaw.

He'd never felt such regret in all his life. The arrogance of him immediately becoming what it always should have been – an instant turn off.

Rubbing over his eyes, Kai's fingers then rested on the bridge of his nose. He just knew of the expression that would be sat on Tala's face right now, and if he saw it, he might just have to punch his lights out.

Tala eased himself up and prowled over to the other side of the bed. He went to embrace Kai from behind but upon feeling the contact of his arms around his neck Kai instantly stood up and flung them off of him.

"What part of _leave _do you not understand?" He snarled at him.

Taken back, Tala's whole expression softened as he instantly became wary of the younger male.

He knew Kai wasn't the overly chirpy type but didn't think he held _this_ kind of fire. This was a whole new side to him. A whole new side he didn't really like.

"Babe it was just sex, chill out."

Kai raised a hand at his blasé response before he threatened, "Do _not_, call me _babe_."

Hearing the same pet name Ray uses for him come from that mouth almost made him cringe. He was Ray's babe, not _his._

"Alright fine, _Kai." _Tala's eyes narrowed at him as he now spoke back in the same icy manner he was receiving.

"It was _just_ sex. What's your fucking problem? I didn't see you complaining last night? Didn't see you trying to stop any of it?"

His words had lost all sense of play and cockiness that they usually held and instead were more of a scolding nature.

If Kai _really_ didn't want any of it he could've just told him to leave and he would have done. He wasn't _that_ kind of guy. He understands the meaning of the word 'no' but it was the exact opposite word that he had Kai moaning out all night so he really didn't see the problem here.

Kai growled in frustration.

He was right.

He couldn't be mad with Tala as he'd only done what he'd deep down wanted him to do. All what he'd craved and desired. He'd only acted upon all the signs he had given him, and hell, it was him who told the bastard to get upstairs in the first place. He didn't have a leg to stand on. He had no argument.

"Just.. Do what you fucking want then!" He barked suddenly feeling like a trapped animal as he stormed in to the en-suite bathroom hoping to wash away a fraction of the sin.

Tala rolled his eyes at the dramatic slam of the door.

If he wanted to get bitched at for no reason he'd have just stayed at home.

Which reminded him he'd need to think of an excuse as to why he never came back home last night... Meh, he'd think of something.

Around 15 minutes had passed and though he was now squeaky clean to look at Kai still felt filthy as he placed his hand on the bathroom door handle.

He couldn't believe his stupidity at not grabbing himself some clothes so he could reappear in front of Tala in a decent state but of course in his anger that wasn't exactly the first thing on his mind.

He placed his ear to the door to try and hear for any movement in the room. Hearing nothing but silence he took in a deep breath to brace himself and hesitantly opened up the door to peer into the bedroom.

Both the bed and the room were empty.

Releasing the breath he'd held on to Kai wandered in to the room and straight to the full length mirror in the corner.

He could clearly see now the aftermath of their evening together.

One on the right side of his neck; two on his left.

One on his collar bone; one on his chest.

He turned around to try and look at his back and his mouth almost fell to the floor.

Scratches sat along his broad shoulders and trailed all down his back.

Thin angry red lines marking his skin like he'd had a fight with a cat and lost.

He turned to face the mirror again and coyly looked over his shoulder before unwrapping his towel to inspect his body further.

He caught the two grazes on his knees again from when Tala had him down on all fours on the carpet, and the several bruises on his legs from when he'd gripped hold of them when he had him on his back.

His body was battered.

He covered himself with his towel again before grabbing himself some baggy sweats and a t-shirt from his drawers.

Glancing over his shoulder to the bedroom door to ensure he was still alone, Kai dropped the towel that sat around his waist and got dressed.

Checking himself over in the mirror, all evidence of his affair was conveniently hidden by clothing apart from the handful of love bites scattered on his neck. Thankfully he had no intentions of leaving the house today.. and apparently for the next few days after.

He rubbed his hand down his face. He felt a little refreshed from the shower but still just felt like utter shit.

He needed coffee.

Heading out of the bedroom he accidently kicked the empty vodka bottle with his foot causing it to roll across the carpet.

Picking it up from the floor he looked it over before heavily breathing out, a feeling of shame washing over him once more as he cautiously made his way down the stairs, beginning his search for the wolf.

He didn't think for one second that Tala had just up and left. Though it would've been for the best if he had of done. It wasn't like they were going to kiss goodbye, say nice to see you and we should do this again sometime – no. This whole thing had gone far enough now.

Well – what occurred last night would be considered _too_ far but there was nothing he could do about it now. What's done is done.

He did feel a little bad for shouting at him too.. only a little.

He couldn't exactly blame all this on him.

Takes two to tango as the saying goes.. and like he'd said in the bedroom he didn't put up much of a fight to stop him..

Upon hearing the sound of birds, Kai sneaked a quick look into the living room to see Tala leisurely stood by the French doors which he'd taken upon himself to open up, gazing out into the yard shirtless with some sweats on and a cigarette entwined between his fingers.

'_Just make yourself at home Tal it's fine... Asshole.'_

Kai shook his head before going through into the kitchen to make the coffee.

Taking a drag of his cigarette Tala exhaled a tired sigh through his nose as he rubbed his forehead, a long stream of smoke flowing from his nostrils.

'_Flat tyre? Nah she wouldn't buy that…'_

Flicking off the ash from his cigarette he stared out at nothing in particular as he racked his brain for a believable story.

'_Bumped in to Dimitri at the convenience store, we went for a few drinks, couldn't drive home, phone died, so stayed at his?'_

Deeming the tale somewhat worthy for now he nonchalantly shrugged before bringing the cigarette back up to his lips and taking another long drag.

Several minutes later, with a mug in each hand, Kai walked back through into the living room heading for Tala when he saw his phone face down on the rug by the sofa.

Must've dropped it at some point.

Swallowing down the nerves, he walked past it, avoiding it for a little longer; the thought of a new message sat waiting from Ray on the screen causing a spin of guilt in his stomach.

With his focus now back on the redhead, who seemed to be in his own little world by the door and hadn't seemed to notice he'd walked in, he stood behind him for a moment examining the marks _he'd_ left on his fair skin before awkwardly clearing his throat and holding the cup of coffee out towards him.

Turning to look over his shoulder at the sound, Tala nodded his head in appreciation, accepting Kai's silent apology for snapping at him earlier and took the cup before he attempted to lift the tension that lingered over them.

"Thanks... _babe_." He added after a brief pause, quietly but still loud enough to be heard, though both the smirk and his words had gone completely over Kai's head as his attention went to his phone on the floor.

Bracing himself for a moment Kai picked it up and pressed the home button.

~No new notifications~

His slate coloured brows instantly knitted together.

None? No missed call or, _anything_?

He wasn't sure whether to feel relieved that Ray hadn't messaged and been sat wondering why he hadn't replied as no suspicions were being raised this way; Or, be royally pissed off that he'd broken his promise and hadn't called him when he was meant to.

He'd be at the village by now, surely. Why hadn't he text him at least?

Noticing the death glare that Kai was currently giving his phone, Tala took the final drag of his cigarette before flicking it out into the yard and blowing the smoke out along with it.

"Y'alright?" He asked with a tint of caution before taking a slurp of his coffee.

Kai threw him a quick glance before flinging his phone on the couch.

"Mhm."

Tala watched the phone bounce on to the sofa before cocking an unconvinced brow and looking at him again.

"Uh.. Doesn't really seem like it.."

Kai just ignored him, knowing full well that the redhead didn't give a rat's ass about him or how he was feeling right now and was only asking to be nosey.

He wasn't stupid. He knew that Tala had no actual feelings for him. He didn't care if he was happy or not. He had just been yet another notch in his mile long belt last night.

It's like he'd said – 'It was _just_ sex.'

Taking a seat down on the couch Kai lounged completely back into it and sipped on his own coffee, his gaze staying low as he let his mind just wander.

Tala tutted knowing full well he wasn't going to get an answer from him and took a seat back down on the sofa, the same spot he was in last night opposite Kai.

Silence fell upon them, Kai seeming to forget Tala was even still there or simply not caring as he sat moping, holding the mug underneath his nose, the smell of caffeine sedating him somewhat as a million thoughts about what Ray was doing right now ran through his head.

Tala was sat with one foot up on the couch, holding his cup in one hand as he switched his phone back on in the other.

It 'ping'd' several times causing Kai to come out of his daydream and scowl over at the fellow Russian who was disturbing his morning brooding.

Seeing his head move to face him Tala glanced up and threw a lopsided smile.

"Well, she isn't happy."

Kai wasn't sure why he cared enough to ask but he did anyway. This being one of those rare occasions that curiosity got the better of him.

"..What's she said?" He almost sounded hesitant, worried on Tala's behalf of the answer.

Thankful Kai was actually talking to him now Tala shrugged a shoulder as he read the texts out in his standard blasé tone.

"Just the usj.. 'Where are you?', 'Do you have any idea what time it is?' 'I'm going to kill you when you get home'… y'know, usual stuff crazy chicks say."

Kai slowly nodded, though he couldn't exactly relate. His 'crazy chick' hadn't even sent him so much as a smoke signal.

"Ray messaged you at all?" Tala redirected.

Kai just shook his head.

Putting two and two together, Tala had figured with him just flinging his phone away that it had something to do with Ray. But even with the information being brought to light it still caused him to frown in doubt. The cat seemed to be very smitten with the bird when he first saw them both together that day. Even he thought it was odd.

"You think it's got something to do with big tits?"

Though his words came out seemingly taunting, like he was rubbing it in, Tala was just genuinely invested in this mystery now. He didn't think the little pussy cat had it in him.

Kai internally recoiled as he was reminded of Mariah's chest. How anyone could find those things attractive was beyond him. They were grotesque.

He shrugged in response; though that was the exact conclusion he had come to also.

"Your guess is as good as mine." He mumbled before taking another sip of his coffee.

Tala's phone then started to ring out, taking his eyes from Kai back down to his lap.

"Aw fuck.." He muttered taking another quick swig of coffee before placing it down on the table in front of him.

Kai's own heart skipped a beat. No.. it wasn't?

Tala stood up from the sofa and cleared his throat before looking to Kai and placing a finger on his lips before he answered.

Kai scowled at him. Like he really needed to be told to stay quiet. What was he thinking he was gonna do? Shout 'Hey! Tell your girlfriend I said hi?' Idiot.

"Hey babyy." Tala spoke out in a put on weak voice.

A high pitched voice then blared through the receiver and he instantly pulled the phone away from his ear.

Kai couldn't hear the exact words that were being yelled from where he was sat but the woman sounded _beyond_ pissed.

"Baby, baby listen, if you'd let me explain?" Tala cooed in the same weak voice, throwing in a cough afterwards for good measure.

Kai took a slow sip of his coffee trying to be as quiet as possible, his eyes not knowing where to look. Was it too early for popcorn?

"So you know that I was going to go check on that job a few blocks away?" He coughed, "Well, they wanted some trees cutting down so I got up the ladder and then it started with that heavy rain, and.." He paused for some kind of dramatic effect, the woman on the other end of the phone waiting in silence, "I fell off the ladder… yeah... no, no, I'm okay.. I mean I'm covered in a shit ton of scratches 'cos there was like this big thorn bush underneath.. yeah got me real good," Tala chuckled before turning to Kai and throwing him a wink.

Kai just sat there stunned, listening to his bullshit story.

He knew Tala was a smooth talker but this guy could talk himself out of handcuffs. Could probably sell snow to a polar bear if he wanted to.

Hell, he could literally be stood outside a burnt down house holding a can of gas and a box of matches and the fucker would more than likely _still_ get away with it!

He was just such an asshole!

So why was he finding him so fucking hot right now?!

"..So yeah the client drove me to the hospital 'cos they weren't sure if I had a concussion or anything and my phone had died.. it was just a _nightmare_ of an evening baby, I'm so sorry if I worried you.. Yeah I know baby, I should be more careful.. but hey, they're releasing me soon so I'll be home in a little bit okay?.. Yeah.. Okay, I love you too baby."

Hanging up the phone Tala exhaled a contented sigh with a smile before meeting with the astounded gaze Kai was currently throwing him.

"What?"

Kai raised his brows and shook his head, throwing him an innocent, and slightly impressed, "Nothing."

Tala shrugged before walking back over to reach for his coffee on the table.

"Anyways unless we're gonna fuck again I best get a move on sweet cheeks." He gulped down the remainder of his coffee, let out a satisfied 'ahh' and placed it back down before making his way towards the living room door.

"I can use your shower right? Yeah? Cool." He threw guns with his hands and clicked his tongue at him before leaving the room and bounding up the stairs.

Kai scoffed not being able to get a word in edge ways with him.

'_Un-fucking-believable.'_

* * *

x-x-x

After the feast that could have realistically fed the entire village three times over and a flow of drinks that rivalled the Atlantic, Ray's eyes began to feel heavy as the homecoming celebrations were still going on until the early hours.

He'd been awake for over 27 hours now and with all the travelling on top of that he was struggling to stay awake.

Excusing himself from the conversation he was barely partaking in with a handful of the elders, he snuck out of the main hut and scuffled along to his cabin, dragging his exhausted feet along the dirt path not even bothering to pick up an oil lantern to light the way.

Pushing open the wooden door Ray was greeted to the complete mess that was his room. He'd completely forgotten that he'd left for dinner having had a whirlwind search for his phone and the majority of his belongings were still scattered all over the floor and his bed.

If he had the energy he'd have uttered an expletive, but instead he silently climbed over his possessions on the floor whilst reaching around himself to pull off his top half of clothing and collapsed face down on his bed, everything bouncing up around him as he fell on to the mattress.

He was sound asleep almost instantly, his body too fatigued to even twitch as a faint snore rumbled in his throat. Completely dead to the world in a matter of minutes, so much so that the creak of his door opening a few moments later didn't so much as cause him to stir.

Having noticed that Ray was no longer at the party, Mariah too had excused herself for bed but hoped she could catch a minute or two with him alone before he passed out.

Seeing she was too late she was undeniably disappointed but despite herself a warm smile appeared on her face as she gazed over at him.

He looked surprisingly comfortable to say he was practically buried underneath all his stuff.

Carefully so as not to disturb him, she started to clear up his things around him, placing them either down on the floor or in his bedside table drawer.

Once the bed was solely occupied by him and not a load of clothes and electronics, Mariah gently sat herself down beside him and stroked his head.

She'd love to just curl up to him right now. Get under the covers and have his strong arms wrapped around her petite frame, snuggled into his chest, breathing in his scent. It didn't seem two minutes ago since they last did that. All those years they were together she was convinced it would have been forever. But she was young, and with youth can come stupidity.

It wasn't that she had ever become bored of Ray, she loved him very much. Always had done. But as she got older and blossomed into the attractive young woman she is now, she started to receive quite a lot of attention from other boys their age as the white tiger team travelled around the world, and keeping up a long distance relationship was difficult.

It was the same for Ray. He had grown in to a very handsome young man and it was no secret he was a BBA heart throb. But the extra attention he used to receive from both genders never really fazed him. He loved Mariah and only had googly golden eyes for her.

They had both agreed that they were just too serious too young, and vowed that they would always remain friends. Mariah had also held on to the hope that once they were older and had both retired from blading they would eventually reconcile and their flame would be reignited when they had no other commitments – but then _he_ came along.

Whenever Ray and Kai became an item Mariah wasn't 100% sure. With the village having minimal amenities, internet for media coverage was non-existent.

That's why when the white tigers had visited Japan one year for a BBA reunion it came as a total shock to see the two of them a little 'touchy feely.'

When Mariah had asked if she could speak to Ray alone and pulled him to one side, he simply nodded with a loved up smile confirming it all.

Whilst she had returned his smile and claimed she was happy for him she was heartbroken.

Removing his headband she placed it on top of the bedside table before placing a soft kiss on his forehead.

As a firm believer in fate Mariah knew that if they were meant to be together they would be. She didn't have to do anything to try and help destiny along. There was a reason Ray was here now and Kai was at home. She just had to put her trust and faith in the stars and hope and pray that they aligned in her favour.

Standing up from the edge of the bed she pulled Ray's phone out from her pocket and glanced down at his things on the floor.

After a few moments though she slipped it back into her pocket.

'_A few more days won't make a difference..'_

Creeping back out of the room she looked over her shoulder to gaze at Ray again who was still sound asleep before closing the wooden door behind her.


	9. Hopeless

**A/N:** Here we are once again.

Honestly don't think y'all are ready for this one..

But a mahoosive shoutout to the one and only Lux for assisting me in a section of this chapter in the form of an RP!

Gosh, it took me back.

Legit had so much fun and it made my life a _whole_ lot easier so thanks love! YEET! xD

The next two chapters are actually both RP's too so expect at least two more gushings over her. *Mwah*

Hope you enjoy. K~

* * *

Chapter 9 - Hopeless

"NO SERVICE?!"

Ray shrieked as he gawked at his phone, his mouth falling almost comically open in disbelief at the zero bars displaying on the screen.

"I.. I don't believe this," he groaned in his defeat.

Mariah awkwardly shifted behind him, her arms behind her back as she looked away at anything but the distressed male currently sat on his knees on the floor in the centre of the cabin.

She had popped by this morning to 'help' Ray look for his phone after putting it off for several days. She'd promised him she'd help look for it but she never said _when_.

Within a few minutes of assisting she had miraculously found it underneath his bed, after crawling underneath and sneakily retrieving it from her front pocket.

"Well of course there's no service Ray we're up in the mountains!" She stated, rolling her eyes and folding her arms.

"Why do you think we write letters? For the fun of it?"

"I need a network," Ray announced as he clambered to his feet and pushed past her heading straight out of the cabin door. "I-I need to call him!"

Turning round and quickly following him out Mariah called to him as she tried to catch up with him as his brisk power walk quickly turning into a sprint out of the village.

"Ray! Where are you going?!"

Ray looked over his shoulder and called back to her, his pace unwavering.

"To the city! I'll be back soon!"

Mariah's feet slowly came to a halt as she watched him go, disappearing in the forest that surrounded the settlement.

She should've just buried the thing somewhere. He wasn't even missing Kai until Lee brought up the last world championships last night whilst they were out roasting marshmallows by the campfire.

Ray hadn't even mentioned him until then!

She pouted and turned back on her heel to retreat back to her own cabin to sulk.

They were having so much fun. And once again _he _had to get in between them and ruin it.

* * *

x-x-x

Kai had been in a foul mood all morning as he worked away in his office, keeping himself busy, distracted and out of trouble.

He'd been checking his Facebook several times a day now the past week for any sort of update from _any_ of the white tigers but there'd been nothing, not since Mariah's check-in at the airport.

One part of him wanted to hear Ray's voice; the other part didn't want to hear from him ever again.

He'd lied to him.

Left for China just so he could be alone with Mariah clearly.

There was no other explanation for it. Obviously he was so busy with her, getting in touch and letting him know he was alive wasn't even on his agenda.

For all Ray knew he was sat sick with worry for his wellbeing and organising a mass search party, but of course he wasn't because our _good friend_ had already let the cat out of the bag and he knew he was safe at least.

Kai could only think of two possible reasons why Ray hadn't been in touch yet.

One was because he'd already fucked her and he couldn't bring himself to speak to him, _or_ he had decided that they really were done, he wasn't ever coming back and he didn't have the guts to break up with him properly.

That was it. That's all it could be.

All of this wasn't even anything to do with him! Ray had just upped and left just so he could be with _THAT!_

He was briskly rummaging through an array of files sat on his desk, picking up various pieces of paper and booklets searching for the specific sheets he knew he needed to sign and get sent off before closing.

"Tiffany?" He bit out. "Did you give me those papers I requested this morning?"

His mind was all over. He couldn't remember his assistant specifically giving them to him but it wasn't like her to not have done something he'd asked of her. She was usually very prompt so it made more sense for him to question his own sanity right now rather than to doubt her competence.

Upon hearing her boss call her name the tall slim brunette whispered into her phone, "I've gotta go, I'll call you once I finish work okay?"

Promptly ending the call and shoving her phone back into her handbag that sat underneath her desk, she stood up and with her heels now clicking along the marble floor as she hurried over to Kai's office, she poked her head in the doorway as she spoke.

"Sorry, you called me sir?" she panted out trying to catch her breath back after her little sprint over.

Kai saved her a glance as he continued to search his desk for said papers.

"Yes, where are the documents I asked for when I first came in this morning?"

Tiffany held a hand to her lipstick clad mouth and gasped as she'd completely forgotten to retrieve them from the email and print them out that morning.

"I'm on it right now sir!" She cried making a dash back to her desk.

Immediately ceasing his search for the papers that didn't even exist yet Kai laid his hands flat on his desk and leant on them, dropping his head with an exasperated exhale.

"Well, _maybe_ if you stuck to taking _personal_ calls on personal _time_ they'd be on my desk right now." He harshly called out to her.

Kai wasn't even that annoyed with Tiffany, he was more frustrated at the raging storm brewing in his head over Ray, but even with all his distractions he'd be lying if he said he hadn't noticed her laxity lately over the past week or so.

Considering how long she'd worked for him he'd have hoped that she'd know better than to keep him waiting when important documents needed his immediate attention. He'd fired many assistants in the past for less due to deeming them incompetent but she usually went above and beyond so he'd let these past few instances of forgetfulness slide.

It wasn't like her though; it was out of character, so he was somewhat concerned.

Feeling a little harsh, he attempted to remove some of the salt from his words and called out to her in a less icy tone but still with his usual flatness.

"I'm sure your lover boy can wait until 5:30."

Tiffany chuckled at Kai's remark, completely brushing off his earlier spat with her as she entered his office again to continue their conversation, the sound of the industrial printer now whirring away as it printed out the several sheets of paper.

She knew what he was like by now, constantly under some form of stress, she never took his lashings out personally.

"It wasn't a boyfriend sir, it was just a friend of mine." She smiled as she made her way over to his coffee machine on the cabinet near the window. "Coffee?"

With his focus on a different file Kai briefly glanced to her and nodded. "Please."

Grabbing his specific mug and filling it with the freshly brewed coffee Tiffany spoke as she walked back over to gently place the steaming liquid onto his desk in front of him.

"Do you remember the guy I hired for you to work on your backyard? Tala?"

Kai choked on his spit the second the redhead's name had registered in his ears. Clearing his throat he picked up his cup and took a small sip after he attempted to nonchalantly reply.

"Uh, vaguely.. What about him?"

He tried to steady his heart that had just skipped a beat as he avoided her eye contact. Why was she bringing _him_ up of all people?

"Well, I'm really good friends with his wife. That was her I was speaking to on the phone just now. She was just updating me on what the hospital said to her this morning."

Kai's breath hitched in his throat.

_W-Wife?_

He was at a complete loss for words. He didn't know how to even begin to react to this new found information.

Wife? He had a fucking _**wife**_?!

Every insult Kai could come up with was being mentally launched at an image of Tala right now. His mind completely working over-time.

He really hoped that his usual poker face expression wasn't letting him down right now.

"Oh.. i-is she okay?" He managed to muster, trying not to seem _too_ interested.

"Oh yeah! Absolutely fine!" Tiffany waved her arms as she reassured him, realising her previous sentence mentioning a hospital seemed pretty dramatic.

"She was just having her final scan this morning. Only a few more weeks to go!" She beamed as she did a little happy dance on the spot.

Kai watched her with a frown, the conversation now completely losing him.

"Until what?"

Tiffany giggled at the clueless expression currently sat on her boss's face and placed a hand on her hip. For someone so smart he really was naïve sometimes.

"For the baby to be born, silly!" She answered him with a smile.

Hearing that the printer had gone quiet she then turned on her stiletto heel and made her way to the door to prepare the files he'd asked for before turning to face him again once she'd reached the door, tucking a strand of brown hair behind her ear.

"I'm sorry again sir for being so slack lately, it's just such an exciting time! I promise I'll focus more though. Give me ten minutes for these documents." She said giving a slight curtsy before leaving.

Kai sat and gawped as he watched her leave his office.

The realisation that Tala was living a completely double life now starting to sink in.

Not only did he have a wife... but he had a kid on the way too?

Did he have no shame?

He had to call this son of a bitch out. Did he really not feel an ounce of guilt for what they'd done?

He'd been texting him most nights all casual wanting to see him again so clearly not.

Ray was just his boyfriend and he felt _awful _about the whole thing.

But a wife? A _**pregnant**_ wife?!

Taking his phone from his trouser pocket Kai scrolled through his recent contacts and firmly pressed on Tala's name with his thumb.

The call being answered after a few rings.

"Well, my day's just got a whole lot better. Wondered when I'd hear from you, hey gorgeous."

"Thought of any names?" Kai bit. What did he think this was gonna be? A pleasant chit chat? A quick check in on his lunch break?!

Tala cocked a brow. "Uhh, what?"

"I said have you thought of any names? Y'know for the baby you've due any second? With your _**wife?**_"

Kai tried to keep his voice down low as he hissed into the phone, taking a quick glance at his office door hoping that Tiffany wouldn't overhear any of this.

Tala just chuckled in response once it'd been spelt out for him.

"D'you know how hot you are when you're mad?"

"You're un-_**fucking**_-believable Tal do you know that?" Kai snarled through gritted teeth as he started pacing up and down his office.

Tala groaned.

_Again_ with the bitching.

"Why do you even care Kai? What's it to you?" He replied in his usual carefree tone. "You knew I wasn't single so why are you _now_ acting so surprised?"

"I didn't know you were fucking _married_ Tala," Kai raised his voice out of frustration before taking another quick glance to his office door, mentally scolding himself for losing his cool and lowering his volume before speaking again.

"And she's due to have your baby? How the fuck am I supposed to feel knowing that?"

Tala rolled his eyes at the melodramatics before an irritated sigh escaped his throat.

"It isn't your problem Kai so whoever told you _my_ business, just _forget_ about it."

"Tiffany told me." Kai retorted. "Y'know, your wife's _best_ friend?" He threw a sarcastic smile before his face immediately dropped back down to deadpan.

Tala tutted upon hearing her name.

"Ah shit, I forgot Tiff was your assistant... Damn... We're really playing with fire here aren't we?"

Kai could almost hear the mischievous smirk through the phone.

"Oh you think?!-" His voice raised again before his eyes darted towards the figure that had just walked back in to his office with a handful of papers.

"-So uh yeah, Tuesday at seven is fine, I'll see you then, and we can discuss that.. thing."

Tala's face contorted with confusion at the random shift of conversation.

"Wha-?"

Was all Kai heard in response before abruptly hanging up the call and quickly shoving the phone back into his front pocket.

"Here you go sir," Tiffany offered as she handed over the wad of paper, just catching the end of his conversation presumably with a client.

He gave a quick nod of thanks as he pretended to look over the sheets, though his actual attention was elsewhere.

"So, your friend, and... Tala was it?"

He started after a moment, praying that he wasn't coming across as too invested as he fished for more information on the little rat.

"They been married long?"

* * *

x-x-x

Ray felt like he'd been walking for hours now.

He was currently several miles out of the village and had been glancing down at his phone every several steps, holding it up to the sky every now and then, hoping for that "no service" text to disappear from the corner of his screen and be replaced with bars.

'_Come on..'_ he mentally pleaded as a few specks of rain started to fall onto his screen.

Shouldn't be much further now surely?

After another twenty minutes of walking he could just make out Beijing over the horizon and low and behold his phone finally connected to a mobile network.

As old notifications started to pour through he disregarded them all with a gasp as he frantically clicked onto his favourites and immediately pressed on to Kai's name.

Shoving the phone to his ear, both excitement and anxiety churned in his stomach as the dial tone rang, his heart racing now as he waited for him to pick up.

With his phone vibrating in his front pocket Kai shifted it out and took in the caller I.D.

A mix of emotions soared through him as Ray's name sat on the display.

Could today get any more dramatic?

He'd pictured this moment of when he'd finally call him but didn't envision the anger that would come along with it.

He let it go, just staring at it for about two more rings, gathering his words before picking up. Telling himself not to just bust right out of the gate screaming and yelling, that they could get through this calmly like the adults they were.

Then his mouth moved.

"And here I thought a mountain lion got to you." Kai said in deadpanned tone.

Ray let out a laugh of relief.

Kai's familiar flat tone was like music to his ears as all the nerves he originally held over this phone call began to drain from him. He should've known Kai wouldn't have been that mad with him, that he'd understand _something_ must have happened beyond his control that would refrain him from calling.

"Babe! You wouldn't _believe_ how long I've tried to get in contact with you!"

"Really?"

At first Kai sounded amused and actually interested, maybe a little taken back at the effort, if it wasn't for the bite in his tone.

"Pretty sure if you actually _had_ put in some effort you would have contacted me when you were supposed to. Seeing as how the rest of our friends already knew when and where you were the second you got there."

Ray's heart sank a little upon hearing Kai's voice transition to what seemed a little more on the icy side now.

He didn't blame him for being a little pissed off as he'd have been worried sick too if he hadn't got in contact with him until days later. But what he just said confused him, he hadn't spoken to anyone since he got here, not him, not their friends, no one - he had no phone!

"What do you mean? I couldn't even find my cell for the first few days babe, and _then_ when I did eventually find it I had no freakin' signal!" He awkwardly laughed trying to bring light back to the conversation as he paced up and down, making sure not the stray too far from where he'd found the network.

"I've had to practically walk back to Beijing to get service Kai so don't talk to me about effort okay?"

"So, what is it you want?" Kai then asked in a bored tone, even if inside he felt just a slight bit better that Ray had actually put in the effort of getting in contact with him. Then again, it wasn't enough to cut out the sting he already felt for just how long it took and that damn picture Mariah had posted to Facebook.

If she had the signal to do that, surely Ray had the signal to call him at least once!

"Better yet, where was your phone?" He asked to cover the slip of his tongue a second ago.

He had missed the sound of his voice, had been craving it something desperately and didn't want him to hang up based on the fact he was being a downright ass. After all it wasn't Ray's fault that Tala was married and had a fucking kid on the way.

God this was all so messed up..

Ray's eyes narrowed at Kai's first initial response.

Was he actually for real right now?

Sure be mad, but he'd just explained the situation he'd been in, and there wasn't anything he could've done about it. There was no one more frustrated than he was. As soon as he'd found the damn thing he was straight out of the village.

"Well I don't know where it went but I eventually found it just in my room… But I'd searched my shit for days and I swear it just wasn't even there before."

_'Too busy living the married life with the pink thing.'_ Kai thought angrily to himself.

"Should keep a better eye on your things." He then said in a humorous, sarcastic tone.

"Yeah, my bad I guess.. I'm sorry if I worried you but I don't know why you're acting like I did this on purpose.. I promised you I'd call didn't I? I don't just make promises Kai for the fun of it. The whole thing has just been out of my control."

Ray kicked a little stone in front of him as he meandered around the area. The light rain continuing to slowly fall around him.

"Ready to come home then?" Kai bluntly asked, completely brushing off everything he had just said.

Ray stopped pacing.

"Well.. I was actually planning on staying for another week. The elders want me to help out with a few more things around the village before I leave." He hesitantly responded.

"Fine." Kai breathed out in a huff, "That's fine, Ray, just fine."

The idea of him staying for another week actually wasn't that bad, maybe by then he'd have gotten rid of the guilt that had clung to him like a second skin since that night Tala had been over. And even more so now since he'd added another layer with the new found info from this morning.

Maybe in another week all the marks in him will have gone too, and he'd be able to actually look Ray in the face as if nothing happened, move on from it, not worry about it anymore.

What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him, right?

By Kai's tone it didn't take a genius to work out that it wasn't in fact fine at all.

Why was he being like this? So cold?

Ray didn't really know what to even say to him at this point. It seemed that everything he said was just wrong and pissed him off even more, or he was just making himself look more and more guilty with every sentence.

Kai then nonchalantly spat out at him again.

"I wasn't really worried though, about you not getting a hold of me, and sure you may have never broken a promise but lying seems to be right up your alley. Huh?"

Ray scowled.

He had been initially willing to take some heat from him but Kai was starting to take advantage of his kind nature now. Any remaining nerves completely diminishing as his own tone now adopted the same bite he was receiving though his heart began to pound in his chest.

"Oh you weren't? Well, fuck me and all I thought then.. and lie about what Kai? What have I allegedly lied to you about?"

It would be a lie if he said the way this conversation was going wasn't making him nervous.

What did Kai know? What had he figured out?

"Well, I'm pretty sure you said you were just going to visit family.. _Alone._" Kai answered in an angrier tone, looking up Ray's with his own. "

Ray's heart fell in to his stomach.

How did he even know? Maybe he didn't and was just bluffing..

Did he lie and say she wasn't or tell Kai the truth?

"Well.. Technically I never said who was going to be here or not.. I just said I was leaving." He muttered out.

Kai chuckled though it was dark.

"And you forgot to add one little, no scratch that, big detail. Didn't you _honey_?" He then bit back with a voice laced in poison, the burning jealousy visible.

"Can see why you'd want to stay another week, by all means. Go get it out of your system if it makes you happy!"

Ray's face contorted as he held his free arm out away from him.

"What is your obsession with her Kai?! How many times do I have to tell you that there's nothing going on between me and Mariah?!" He shouted back at him, the rain reflecting his own anger and starting to fall heavier now.

Kai scoffed back into the phone, "That picture says otherwise."

"What picture?!" Ray screeched before his face instantly fell.

The only pictures there had been were what Mariah had taken of the five of them.. And then of course that second one of just them two..

Had she sent them to him? It was just an innocent kiss on the cheek. He'd done nothing wrong! Ray's heart pounded in his chest awaiting Kai's next words.

"You're really going to play stupid with me, right now? Oh sure, _you_ had no signal but the tramp had enough to post those pictures of you when you got there. Then your phone goes _'missing'_ until now, I wasn't born yesterday Kon." Kai fired out, "The least you could have done, was responded to my texts with something as well instead of waiting days later to call me up!"

Ray blinked.

"I-I didn't get any texts?"

Bringing the phone down in front of him he disregarded Kai's outburst as he frowned at the screen for a second before placing it back up to his ear.

"Babe I swear I didn't get any texts from you."

"Bullshit!" Kai practically screamed back at him, to hell with keeping things calm. Tiffany had left for home some time ago now so he could shout all he wanted.

"I sent you three, right around when you should have been landing. Ohhhh, but that's right. You lost your phone." He stopped the yelling long enough to sound patronising.

"Kai you have to believe me, I swear on my life I didn't get any texts from you," Ray pleaded with him, never feeling so helpless in his life. "Why would I intentionally ignore you?!"

He sounded frantic now. This whole situation slowly turning from bad to worse and it was seemingly becoming unfixable with every response.

He had no way to prove it to him and knowing Kai well enough he only ever believed what he could physically see, what was in plain black and white in front of him.

The hard evidence proving Kai's thoughts to be true was a photo of him and Mariah looking cosy as hell with her planting one on his fucking cheek, whereas Ray had nothing in his defence.

"Why would you intentionally ignore me? Hm, good question. Why would you intentionally go _there_ to start with? If you wanted your space Ray the house is big enough for you! You didn't have to jump on a plane and fly miles away just to get away from me."

"I told you that I wanted to visit my family too! But look at how you're being with me! It's okay you saying I could've stayed, just gone in to a different room, but did you ever think Kai that after that evening I didn't feel safe in that house with you? Did that ever cross your damn mind once you'd sobered up?"

Ray had tried to bite back but the tears began to prick at his eyes now.

This was not how he intended this phone call to go.

A part of him wanting to just get on the next plane home to sort this face to face with him, and the other wanting to just hang up, go back to the village and just stay there for the rest of his days.

Kai went quiet for what seemed forever, small taps coming through the other side as if he was tapping the desk with his fingers nervously the only thing for a moment before a loud sigh.

"I... I didn't mean to hurt you... You know that, I would never intentionally hurt you like that, and I'm sorry that I scared you. But it was one time, one time I fuck up and you high tail it out of the damn country as if I was going to come at you with a knife! You didn't give me the chance to make it right, you didn't give me any way to make it better! No! You just up and left Ray!" He fired off once more, his voice rising higher and higher as the hand that had been tapping the desk slammed down on the top of it.

Ray jumped at the sound in his ear and pressed his lips together.

He thought for a moment he'd somehow managed to douse the fire but upon hearing Kai's voice get angrier and angrier, slowly being reignited again, he knew that wasn't the case.

"I know it wasn't intentional Kai but you still did. And all because you were drunk. Have you not realised yet that alcohol just doesn't agree with you? Don't you remember all that it's done to you in the past?" His voice cracked as the memories of the broken 18 year old Kai once was came back to him.

"You might think this is the first time you've fucked up but I don't think you quite realise just how much I've had to deal with during our relationship together. I didn't leave just over that one thing, it's been a build-up of _many_ things. You grabbing me like that on that night was the final straw, and I'm sorry but I just didn't want to be around you."

Kai rolled his eyes.

Did he really need to be reminded of every poor decision he's ever made due to drink? Well newsflash Ray he had a huge one to add to the list.

"Of course you didn't want to be around me, not when you had your whore waiting with open arms to make it all better. Protect you from me, how sweet." He said in that patronising tone again, "If I've been that terrible all these years then why the hell have you even stuck around? Was it the money, the thrill of trying to fix me? Exactly why have you stuck around if I'm such a _fuck_ up Ray?" His voice unwillingly cracked.

This hurt him just like it no doubt hurt Ray, maybe even more.

Whilst his tone was ruthless now his question was a genuine one.

Why does he continue to stick around?

After what had just happened the moment Ray was gone why would he come back? He had fucked up, in more ways than one, and like the glutton for punishment he was, he just kept on digging that hole for himself.

"Because I love you, you fucking idiot! Are you serious right now? You think I stayed with you for your money? Do you actually fucking hear yourself?!" Ray's eyes slit at the accusation of him being a gold digger. Any tears immediately drying as rage began to course through him.

How could he even say any of this? Is that what Kai truly thought of him?

"After everything I've done for you..?" His voice then trailed off, Kai's venom truly setting in to his veins, slowly killing his will to fight for this any longer.

His chest heaved, his breathing becoming erratic as if everything Kai had said to him had just hit him all at once like a train.

How he wasn't even worried that he'd not heard from him, accusing him of being a cheater, a liar, and now a gold digger?

Yes, he more than likely wasn't thinking straight when he'd booked the flight. He was tired, upset, angry.

Yes, ok, he'll admit, when he first saw Mariah again that night they all went out together, she looked gorgeous, and yes the past _may_ have resurfaced in his mind, and yes he _might _have fantasised about her once or twice.

There was _something_ for Mariah. He wasn't sure what, but whatever it was, the love he had for Kai was stronger.

That he knew.

But all he'd said just now, left an awful taste in his mouth.

Ray pushed his soaking wet bangs out of his face. Even if he was crying right now the rain would completely mask his tears, but this asshole didn't deserve them. Not a single drop.

"And the one time I needed you home, you left." Kai's voice came out broken worse than before.

He knew he couldn't blame Ray for what he did. He's a grown man and should take responsibility for his own actions. But if he hadn't have left him that day what happened with Tala wouldn't have occured.

Ray should have stayed. But he chose to leave.

Whether it was for Mariah or not, he chose to leave him behind.

Ray swallowed as he felt his heart slowly breaking.

He knew that tone. He didn't hear it often but that empty tone only ever surfaced when a part of him was broken.

But after all this, this conversation, Kai wasn't the only one fixing to break right now.

"You've brought this upon yourself Kai. I'm sorry but I've spent long enough thinking about you and your feelings. It's about time I started to think about my own."

His gaze fell to the floor as he bit down on to his lip. The tears he'd been fighting back slowly began to fill his eyes.

The silence came back on the other side, Kai trying hard to gain his bearings while his scrambled brain tried to come up with something else. Like an excited child with a new toy, they had gone and broke themselves apart like this and when it came down to it, to the bottom of the barrel, _he_ was the only one in the wrong.

As much as he wanted to tell him, he wanted it just as much to have him actually come home. So he bit his lip hard for a moment more, letting the silence give them a bit of peace before he nodded.

"Okay."

Was the simply reply, one he even had a hard time just saying and clearly wanted to say more but was in no position to be making demands.

For once, Ray was the one in control now.

Ray knew their conversation was pretty much dead and buried now.

If he knew it was all going to pan out like this he'd have thought twice about calling. Thought twice about walking all the way out here in the pouring rain just to try and put his mind at ease, to let Kai know he'd got here safe. But, he clearly didn't care.

'Okay,' Is that all he really had to say? 'Okay'?

"Have you even missed me Kai?" Ray weakly asked, his voice being somewhat drowned out by the rain beating down on the dirt track he was on.

"What kind of question is that?" Kai chuckled, but it was dry.

"Yes, I've missed you .Why do you think I sent you _three_ texts practically begging you to call me as soon as you got there? I started to miss you as soon as walked through to the damn security." He loosened his tie as he started to feel uncomfortably vulnerable the more he poured his heart out to him.

"As much as I have fucked up here Ray, I care about you and want you safe. I'm not that much of an asshole believe it or not!" He spat quickly, trying hard to reel it all in before it got to the point he couldn't.

"Then again, since you're there and I'm here, I must be!"

And there went the dynamite again, his words flowing out of him like an erupting volcano before he took in a breath.

Suddenly the weight of his guilt then came crashing down on him.

Whilst some of his anger was truly meant for Ray and what he'd done, a portion of it was aimed at Tala, but the brunt of it all was mostly frustration for himself and how he could have been so stupid to begin with.

No wonder Ray was tired of him, had ran off the first chance he got. All he did was work and lash out at him and everyone around him when things didn't go his way.

He had never deserved him, and Ray certainly didn't deserve all he had done and said.

"Of course I've missed you Ray.. I love you..."

Even though he said it, felt it, there were circumstances that screamed otherwise inside his head. Just when he had one foot back in the door he kept taking it out and shoving it back in.

"I'm sorry."

With that there was a click as he hung up the phone, his last words back to being broken.

"Kai?" Ray called out, bringing the phone down in front of his face to check the screen before shouting into the receiver again, "**KAI!**"

He'd hung up on him.

Pressing his name, Ray called him back.

No, he'd just lost signal again, maybe? Yeah that was it, he didn't hang up.

Kai held his head in his hands with his elbows rested on his desk, the phone rattling against the wood with the vibrations from the call.

With tear filled eyes he involuntarily hiccuped as he pressed decline.

He couldn't speak to him. Not now. Not being the sniffling mess he was and especially not after all he'd done to him.

With the call being sent to voicemail Ray almost vacantly dropped his hand from his ear as he stared over at Beijing in the distance, the heavy rain now crashing down on him.

Were they over?

Looking down at his phone he wiped over his screen to try rid some of the rain water and clicked on to his notifications.

_~You've been tagged in 2 photo's~_

With him now seeing first-hand the picture that Mariah took of the two of them he could now understand why Kai was so upset with him. An outsider could quite easily have believed they were a couple.

His lower lip quivered before he yelled out in frustration.

Launching his phone away from him, the screen instantly shattered and faded to black once it hit the ground.

Turning on his heel, full of raging adrenaline he ran as fast as he could back to the village.

She _must_ have done this on purpose. Knew how Kai would feel upon seeing that photo, knew exactly what he'd think.

This was her plan all along! She'd convinced him to come here, set all this up so Kai would break up with him, and for what? So they could get back together? Was that her big master plan?

Ray scoffed to himself at the thought, his sprint unwavering. He was packing his shit and leaving as soon as he got back to the village.

Fuck this place, fuck the elders,

Fuck _her._


	10. Hook, Line and Sinker

**A/N: **Hellur ;)

Hope my fellow Brits had a good bonfire night. I spent it cuddling my little pooch since she's not a huge fan of fireworks. Bless her.

So, as mentioned previously we have yet another amazing RP w/ Lux where I was Ray and she was Mariah. Little hoe bag.. xD thanks again mate!

Anyway - Enjoy!

K~

* * *

Chapter 10. Hook, line and sinker.

The rain had eased off slightly by the time Ray finally made it back to the white tiger village, but having been outside for a total of 4 hours now he was completely soaked to the bone.

He head straight to his cabin, giving none of the other residents a second look as he flung the wooden door open, stormed in and slammed it behind him before snatching his duffle bag from underneath his bed and carelessly stuffing the first thing his hands came in contact with inside.

He was done with this place. Done with _her_.

Both had unnecessarily come in between him and Kai and he needed to get out of here and on the first plane back home so he could make things right with him.

This whole thing was just a huge misunderstanding. If he was face to face with him he could fix it..

He'd made his decision.

When Kai had asked him if he was ready for home, he should've said yes. He realised this now.

He _was_ ready for home, and **nothing** could make him change his mind.

Whatever he felt for Mariah would go.

It'd past.

Maybe it was just because things were so bad at the time between them, _anyone_ could've shown him kindness and he'd have grabbed for it.

Between his erratic packing there came a few soft knocks on his door before it creaked open, Mariah's head poking in before she stepped inside, her eyes went slightly wide at what he was doing.

"Everything okay?" She asked in a timid voice, shifting her feet where she stood.

Ray's back tensed as he heard her. No doubt she'd try and convince him to stay but his mind was made up. This was it.

"Leave me alone Mariah!" He barked, refusing so much as to even look at her as he continued to storm around the cabin, recklessly hurling his clothes from his wardrobe towards the general direction of his bags.

Mariah swallowed the lump in her throat, why was he yelling at her?

"I was just asking if you were alright, what's wrong? Talk to me Ray." She pleaded, stepping into the cabin more and closing the door behind her.

He threw some shoes at the growing pile of screwed up clothes before abruptly turning to face her, his golden eyes slit.

The thought of what he was about to say to her killed him as he locked with her own amber coloured eyes. She looked nervous and the thought of him being the one to cause such fear within her unsettled him but he had to keep his guard up. He was leaving tonight and that was that.

"_You're_ what's wrong Mariah. Be honest with me. Why did you upload that photo of us on facebook?"

Mariah gaped at his expression, though she had come prepared.

"Because I was happy you were here, why else would I have uploaded it silly?" She asked in a soft, light, chuckle, "It's not often you get to come home, so I wanted to have it to look at."

Ray's pressed his lips together now as his initial full blown rage began to falter at her unfazed and softly spoken explanation.

He honestly didn't know what to believe. She hadn't even hesitated with that so a part of him wanted to trust in her words entirely however the other half knew she had a reputation for schemes.

He growled out, "Well did you not think to maybe ask me first before you put it out there for the whole world to see?"

Mariah shrugged her shoulders.

"I didn't think it'd be a problem, it never has been before. If you're upset about it you should have said something sooner, I would have taken it down if that's what you wanted." She said, though knew the damage was already done. Exactly what she wanted, though refrained from showing it openly.

"I didn't even know you'd uploaded it 'cos I didn't have my phone remember!"

He knew it wasn't her fault that he'd lost his phone but losing that fucking thing had caused a whole boat load of problems for him. He also knew she'd done nothing out of the ordinary here and was just being her typical social media obsessed self.

Realistically it was just his lie about coming here alone that's just come to royally bite him in the ass, and he couldn't exactly blame her for that. He shouldn't have made it seem to Kai that he was just coming here to get away and be by himself.

"I can't help but feel you're mad at more than just a picture though Ray, we've taken hundreds of them before, all have been posted. So, what's actually wrong?" Mariah asked as she stepped up to him, placing a hand on his arm in a friendly gesture. "You can tell me."

He instantly pulled away from her touch and sighed out in frustration as he sat down on the edge of his bed with the mountain of clothes beside him. Running his hands through his wet bangs he then held his head in them, deflated, as his elbows rested on his knees.

He figured he could tell her. The more she knew the more she'd understand why he had to leave and go fix it. She'd support his decision surely.

"I spoke to Kai." He muttered out.

Right then and there it clicked in her head, biting back a smile as she painted on a more concerned look and pat him on the shoulder.

"And what happened?" She asked, moving away and going to the closet for a towel for him, bringing it back over and gently running it over his hair.

He sat up dropping his hands from his face and kept his gaze low in front of him, unaware of her expression as he let her dry him off.

"Well he knows that I'm here with you now, and as I'm sure you can imagine, he's not exactly thrilled about it."

"And why should we care? What's he going to do, honestly? Let him be upset, this is our home too. Did he really not think of that when you left?" Mariah asked in a slight huff, rubbing him down some more with the towel.

"Of course I'm here, we're all here, this is our home and if he has a problem with it he can shove it."

It was then that Ray realised he shouldn't have even brought it up. These two have hated each other for years now, of course she wasn't going to give him sound advice. And it didn't matter anyway he was leaving!

"Well _I_ care Mariah!" He turned to look at her, "You might not see it but underneath his cold exterior he's actually a great guy! He's just insecure about us, but wouldn't you be? We had a connection once and I don't blame him for feeling jealous. He just.. has a hard time controlling those emotions.." He dropped his head in his hands again, this whole situation beginning to mentally drain him now.

He'd had such a great time whilst being here! Was really enjoying his break.

If he was completely honest with himself he'd been too busy during the day helping round the village to even really miss Kai. It was only when he was alone in bed with his own thoughts that the Russian even crossed his mind.

And now he was all Ray could think about.

Mariah rolled her eyes, leaving the towel on the top of his head as she put her hands to her hips and stood in front of him.

"And I'm sure you explained it to him that there's nothing going on, right? So then what's the big deal, it's just a picture, as I said there's hundreds of them of us, and it wasn't like it was just you and me but the others there too. If he's that insecure about his own relationship that's on him, it has nothing to do with you honey."

Ray pulled the towel off of his head and looked up at her.

"Of course I did but it's hard to keep convincing him of that when you're there planting one on my cheek. _We _know nothing's going on but to an outsider don't you see how that could look?" He said trying to reason with her.

He knew she wasn't stupid. And deep down he had an inkling that she did it on purpose sometimes and like a fool he'd kept allowing it. Kept brushing it off as 'Mariah being Mariah' not thinking for a moment how it would make Kai feel.

But it was all just innocent! Wasn't it?

Mariah rolled her eyes again with an audible huff, "It was a peck on the cheek for heaven's sake Ray, quit letting him make you feel bad for keeping up the friendship we've had for years! We've grown up together, we dated, he knows this and it's about time he got over it. Instead, you let him walk all over you like this instead of making him see reason. And really, he might just not want to."

Ray's eyes then dropped from her gaze as he fumbled with the towel in his hands.

He could see both sides.

He remembered how he felt every time fanboys would throw themselves at Mariah back in the day and it hurt. So he could totally see Kai's point of view when he sees her clung to him like a leech, even if they are just friends.

But then what Mariah was saying was true also. They'd been practically family for as long as he could remember. Sure they dated, but that didn't work out and now they were just back to being friends.

_Just friends.. _

Why couldn't Kai just understand that?

"I don't let him walk all over me 'Riah, I just.." He exhaled, not knowing what to even say.

Maybe he did let him walk all over him? Deep down maybe he'd realised that and him coming here was him finally putting his foot down. He had finally had enough.

"Sure you don't, that's why you're totally not in here trying to pack and leave right this second. Right?" She asked in a knowing and accusing tone. "You were going to stay for another week, to spend time with your family. But because he goes and throws a hissy fit you're packing your bags and running to him like the good little doormat he expects you to be. I'd be more concerned with why he's _this_ insecure in your relationship than you are."

Ray's golden eyes then snapped back up to her.

"How is me trying to fix what I caused being a doormat?!" He spat, "At the end of the day_ I_ was the one to leave, hid the fact I had time off work and basically lied to him about my reasons for coming here, he's found it all out so of course he's gonna be pissed! And not to mention I didn't get in contact with him for almost a week after leaving him! What are you trying to insinuate here?"

Mariah stepped back from him as she thought about her answer, though one of his previous statements called for a question of her own.

"What _were_ your reasons for coming here?"

Ray shifted.

Shit.. did he really just let that slip?

"Just y'know.. it doesn't matter.. What are you trying to insinuate about him?" He asked again brushing off her question.

Mariah frowned a little though let it go.

"Okay, so he found out. So what? I'm sure he's told a few white lies in his life, it's not the end of the world Ray. But if you run off to him like this, then how is that really going to fix anything? You came here, so I thought, because you couldn't stand to be around him, get away because he wasn't being what you needed and right now it doesn't sound like that's going to change if you go back now or later."

She paused, starting to pace slightly in front of him as she went more into thought about what to say.

"And you really have to ask? He's had countless of flings, you're not his first and you know that, but how _dare_ you have one girlfriend your whole life before him and he still can't get over it. You two have been together for _years_ now, so really, what is it _he's_ got to be so insecure about here? You should have more reason to believe he'd go off and find himself something else more than he has reason to start trying to point fingers and accuse you."

Ray blinked, his eyes following her as she paced in front of him.

All of her strangely over-passionate wisdom slowly sinking in. She sure did have a lot to say on this topic. Almost seemed premeditated.

He'd never thought of it like that before though. Was Kai pointing fingers at _him_ simply due to his own guilty conscience?

"No.. He wouldn't do that to me." He shook his head as he spoke, though his tone wasn't an overly convinced one as he stared off and allowed his mind to wander some.

It wasn't as if Kai didn't once have a traitorous streak. It wouldn't exactly be out of his character to do something like that.

After a brief moment though he quickly brushed off the feeling of doubt she'd implanted within him and he spoke out more firmly now.

"No, he wouldn't even have the time to cheat, he's barely enough time in the day for _me_ with his work schedule never mind for two."

"Or, he just doesn't make the time for _you_." She said, her words slithering out of her quickly.

Ray rolled his eyes at her. He wasn't playing this game.

"He runs a multi-million dollar company Mariah, I understand that his time has to be thinly spread.. I knew that before we even started dating so that's something I've just had to accept… Doesn't mean he loves me any less or that he's messing around with someone else." He rest his cheek on a fist, his elbow planted on his knee.

He was growing slightly bored of Mariah's constant digs at Kai now. He got it, she can't stand the guy.

"I'm not saying he is screwing around or anything, but look at it from where I'm standing Ray. Why else has he not been able to let this go? He's obsessed with the fact you and I still talk, are still friends. Just because he washed his hands clean after getting them dirty doesn't mean you had to do the same."

Ray sighed out, "I know that. But I don't think it exactly helps the situation when you openly dislike him the way you do either.. You've had a problem with him since we were teens and you make it _very_ clear, so of course that's gonna add to his disliking that we're friends."

Mariah shrugged her shoulders, "And it's no skin off my teeth if he feels the same, that's his problem not mine or yours. I'm not trying, never have tried, to come between you two and you know that. I've always just been here for you, will _always_ be here for you."

Initially Ray held a fraction of doubt over Mariah's true intentions however her words just now caused any scepticism to melt away.

Sure she held a disliking for Kai and she probably always will do but as for him and her, Ray should've known that any deeper feelings she once had for him would eventually fade and they could be truly platonic with one another.

Just simply being there for each other.

No hidden motive, no schemes, _just_ friends.

Whilst his feelings for her were questionable right now, he was sure it'd fizzle back out.

"Thanks 'Riah, I know.. and I'll always be here for you too.. Don't ever forget that." He softly said dropping his hand from his face as he smiled up at her.

She smiled back, a fang slipping through as she stepped back up to him and knelt down to his level.

"I know you are, so please stay?" She asked, putting a hand up on his knee. "Just stay for another week like you said you would."

Ray locked eyes with hers before taking a glance over at his, to say the least, shockingly packed bags.

He knew this would happen. Should have locked his door after he came back. He just knew she'd try and convince him to stay.

But as much as he wanted to sort things out with Kai he _did_ say to the elders he would assist with the village for a little longer. Though he didn't reside here permanently now, he was still Driger's master and was still a member of the White tiger clan. He had a duty to fulfil and was a man of his word.

Besides, knowing Kai he'd just be sulking now for a few days and wouldn't want him around anyway. Would be best just to let him cool down after that phone call.

Let him actually miss him.

Ray turned to face her and nodded as he spoke, flashing her a smile, "Alright, I'll stay."

Mariah's smile widened, clearly pleased with his answer and pecked him on the cheek before he had time to even register that she had bounced up and planted it on him.

"Good."

Ray's heart skipped a beat at the unexpected movement from her. The warmth of her lips upon his cheek sending a tingle down his spine as his cool damp clothes still clung to his body.

He awkwardly laughed it off, not really knowing what to say to her now.

"Guess I'll uh, unpack then?" He announced slapping his knees before rising to his feet and stepping towards his bags.

"Do you want me to help?" Mariah asked as she skipped over to him.

Ray looked down to her with a smile, "I mean if you want, sure... I don't know how far I was expecting to get with this type of packing though to be honest." He chuckled out pulling screwed up clothes back out of his bag.

Mariah smiled with a slight twinkle in her eyes, going around him and just dumping one of the bags out on top of the bed. "It's okay, I'm here now."

Silence fell upon them as the two started unpacking his things.

Lifting out some sweatpants Ray sheepishly spoke out as he folded them, "Hey I'm sorry about snapping at you earlier.. None of this was your fault, and yeah, I really shouldn't have tried to blame you for any of this."

Mariah shrugged, folding up her own piece of clothing.

"Don't worry about it, not the first time you've blown up on me and probably won't be the last. You know I can't stay mad at you silly, love makes you say and do things without thinking. It's really okay." She said as she playfully nudged him in the side.

Ray chuckled as he lifted up another item of clothing.

"Yeah but it's no excuse.. Thank you for being so understanding though," He said cheekily bumping his hip into her, nudging her back.

"What are best friends for?" She smirked, tossing a shirt at his face as she flicked it up off the bed and out of the pile. "Just means you'll have to make it up to me somehow."

Catching the shirt he pulled it from his face, flashing his fangs now as he smiled at her.

"Oh yeah? Lay it on me then, how can I make it up to you m'lady?" He laughed out as he bowed down to her.

Mariah chuckled a little as her cheeks were dusted pink in a faint blush.

"Hmmm, I don't know yet. I'll let you know when I think of something though, keep you on your toes." She winked at him, turning back to the bed and sorting through his pile of clothes.

Ray smirked as he stood upright catching the wink she threw at him, his own cheeks becoming warmer now.

"Well I look forward to it." He said folding up the same shirt she threw at him and placing it on the pile they were slowly making.

Mariah watched him out the corner of her eye as they piled a few more clothes up, the silence welcomed for the time being until she turned back to him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I need to tell you something."

Immediately stopping mid fold of some pyjama bottoms Ray turned to look at her giving her his full attention.

"Sure, what is it?"

She paused for second, being careful on how she presented this to him after everything but it had been slowly eating at her after everything that had happened.

"I don't want to upset you, or think anything of this too much like I know you will, so just hear me out." She started, keeping her hand on his shoulder.

"I.. I still love you Ray, and I know that's not what you want to hear because I still have no intentions of getting between you and Kai and what you have. But I don't want you to be unhappy either, and since you've been here you've looked happier than I've ever seen you in a long time. Why not consider staying longer?"

Ray opened his mouth to speak but no words came as he processed what she'd just said to him.

She wasn't wrong, he had been happier whilst being there. It was a completely different lifestyle than being back in Japan, one that was a lot simpler and one that he was more accustomed to.

But stay longer? Agreeing to another week was a hard pill to swallow knowing what would be awaiting him upon his return, so staying even longer… he wasn't sure.

But then there was the L bomb.. Why did she have to drop that.. He'd had his suspicions but after all she'd said earlier he really thought he could've buried them.

"I.. I don't know Mariah.." He said, looking a little uneasy now.

"Just think it over, I don't want to seem like I'm pressuring you or anything. I just want you happy." She said gently, her hand still on his shoulder as her feet inched her closer.

He nodded though knew he couldn't stay.

Whilst this was where he was born and raised this wasn't his home anymore. He had a whole new life back in Japan, a job, a house.. Kai..

He blinked repeating what she'd just said to him in his mind.

_'I still love you.'_

His amber eyes now just fixated on hers. He noticed she was getting closer to him and for some reason his feet stayed firmly planted as she closed the distance between them.

"_I_ want to make you happy." Mariah breathed out, their chests now touching as she stepped as close as she could to him.

Ray couldn't help but glance down at her lips, a million thoughts running through his mind as his heart rate increased. He couldn't do this.. could he?

No.

"Don't Mariah... don't do this.." His gaze broke off from hers as he softly pleaded with her, though he didn't move back from her nor push her away, just turned his head away from her.

A part of him _really _wanted this, but they'd gone through this many a time and it always ended with one of them being hurt.

Mariah sighed and stepped an inch back, her hand falling to her side from his shoulder.

"Okay..."

He swallowed, feeling like he could breathe a little easier now that she wasn't so close to him, though he wasn't sure why but he reached out for her hand and rubbed her skin with his thumb.

"You know we can't… I'm with Kai, and I love him... I couldn't do that to him Mariah it would destroy him."

"I wasn't thinking, it's not your fault." Mariah said quickly, "It's not your fault Ray, it's okay. I'm sorry I wasn't thinking."

Seeing her flustered he placed a hand on her cheek to try and calm her, slowly shaking his head as he spoke to her.

"Don't worry about it 'Riah it's fine.. We've been through enough for me to not hold this against you. We'll just forget about it okay?"

Tears slipped down her cheeks.

"But how can I? How can I forget when I love you?"

Ray wiped her tears with his thumb as he stared at her. He wasn't sure how to even answer that.

You can forget actions however feelings were a completely different story. The same feelings he'd struggled to ignore also.

He glanced down at her lips again. The overwhelming urge to press his own against them to comfort her becoming unbearable.

And there was the L word again.

It tugged at his heart strings every time she uttered the word. Unable to hear it from her lips without him questioning his own feelings for her.

Did he still love _her_? Was that what he was feeling?

During his short time here over the past several days the two of them really had become inseparable.

From sunrise to sunset, spending a ridiculous amount of time together just like when they were kids, never growing tired of the other, always laughing and joking around never running out of things to talk about.

They'd collect water from the nearby river every morning and fire wood in the afternoon, then just generally hang out afterwards until the early hours.

He'd missed this…

_'I still love you.'_

Ray placed his forehead down against hers before weakly speaking out to her as his self-restraint was slowly wearing down to nothing.

"Please stop saying that.."

Her eyes slipped closed, her heart thudding in her chest so hard it was almost hard to breathe with him so close now. She hardly heard what he said, her hands coming around on his shoulders again.

"Don't take that away from me, not again. Let me love you... Just one last time."

_'Just one last time' _

Her words swirled around his mind, his own heart now pounding in his chest.

Her touch on his shoulders, her breath on his face, it was all giving him goosebumps..

Just one last time..

Ray closed his eyes, tilted his head and without thinking pressed his lips softly against hers.

Mariah fell more into him, the soft touch turning more harsh and demanding as she pressed in harder.

_Hook, line, and sinker._

As her mouth worked against his, forcing herself not to smirk into the kiss, she slithered her arms around his neck and pressed her breasts firmly against his chest.

Ray followed suit, reciprocating the passion not realising just how hungry he was for her.

Wrapping his arms around her waist his hands danced along her curves instantly becoming reacquainted with her petite frame.

She moaned, loudly, gripping at his hair and grinding against him.

"I've missed you." She panted against his lips, her face already dry from the few tears that had been shed.

It had been some time since Ray had felt a woman's touch. Grabbing a hold of her hips he pulled her in closer with ease, nowhere near using the same amount of strength he was used to using when trying to manipulate a male… When trying to manipulate Kai.

He'd never be the one in control with him.

Not that he minded, he loved being taken by him.

But this.. This was nice. He felt, powerful.

With the sound of her moan ringing in his ears he instantly hardened, parting his lips as she panted against them. He had no control of himself now, his fangs on show as he latched on to her neck and his hands having a mind of their own as they possessively groped every inch of her.

_'Just one last time'_

That's all this would be..

_'Just one last time.'_


	11. No Funny Business

A/N: Here again! Hope everyone is well. I've had an eventful last several days to say the least but things are looking up.

The hole just keeps getting deeper for these boys.. I know.. And I'm not even sorry for it.

For those following, my dear friend Ms. Heart did us another cheeky little lemon over on Ao3 called "One Last Time" detailing the events that transpired from the previous chapter with Ray and the pink thing. As always the lemons aren't necessary for the story but I can't comprehend why anyone would pass up the opportunity to have some citrus in their lives.

Back to Kai in this one. Hope you enjoy! K~

* * *

Chapter 11 – No Funny Business.

Eventually the phone stopped vibrating along the wooden desk, Ray clearly given up on being ignored and the office was filled with an eerie silence.

That was _not_ how Kai wanted their first phone call to go but it was like word vomit he just couldn't hold any of it back.

He'd meant some of what he'd said though. He had missed him. The house felt dead without Ray's warm energy running through it. Even with the heating on it still felt cold but to find out that he would rather spend his time off work playing happy families with Mariah and the other ferals of that damn village he just couldn't bite his tongue.

He just sat there.

His elbows still on the desk with his hands locked together resting underneath his sniffling nose, staring off at nothing as the lost and empty feeling continued to numb him.

Frustrated with how emotional he was and in an attempt to pull himself together Kai snatched a tissue from the box that sat on his desk and roughly wiped his face and nose before chucking it into the little trash can that sat beside his desk.

Pushing himself up from his plush leather desk chair he loosened his tie a little before grabbing his suit jacket that was draped on the back of the chair and shoved his arms inside.

There was no point sticking around here to mope. If he was going to cry like a little bitch he'd rather be in the comfort of his own home at least.

Reaching for his phone on the desk he slipped it into his jacket pocket and made his way out, flicking off the light switch before he left, consuming the whole room in darkness.

It was pitch black outside now. The only light being several street lamps that illuminated his path as he pushed open the glass door, the cold night air hitting his cheeks as he turned to lock up the now dark and vacant building.

Stuffing one hand in his pocket, shielding it from the cold, he took out his phone with the other and like the glutton for punishment he was went onto Ray's Facebook page.

His heart swelled momentarily as he gazed at his profile picture but instantly broke again when his eyes met the latest tagged photo.

He couldn't get over how happy Ray looked in the photo. Kai honestly couldn't remember the last time he'd seen him smile like that.

Well if Ray wanted to stay there, stay with _her,_ they were welcome to each other!

"добрый вечер"

Kai paused in his tracks at the husky voice and his crimson eyes shot up from the phone screen. He definitely wasn't expecting to see Tala stood outside of his building and now that he had seen him there was definitely nothing '_good'_ about this evening.

"So you're stalking me now?" Kai bit out completely disregarding the redhead's pleasantries.

He really was in no mood for this. The uncertainty of his current relationship status feeling like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. He just wanted to go home and brood.

Tala scoffed.

"Get over yourself kid I was just in the area. Saw your car was still here so figured I'd just stick around for a bit." He pushed himself off the lamp post he'd been leaning on and took a few steps forward, stopping at the bottom of the stone steps as he looked up to Kai, his hands too leisurely resting in his black bomber jacket.

"Wanted to continue our conversation seeing as you hung up on me this afternoon and never text me back."

Kai threw him a dirty look before stuffing his phone back into his jacket pocket, pulled out his car keys and pressed the key fob to unlock his car.

There was a reason for that. He had nothing to say to him, not after what he'd found out earlier on.

Casually walking forward Kai made his way down the several stairs and to his car, avoiding blue eyes entirely.

"Conversation's over Tala." Kai's tone was low, almost deadly as he walked past him. "Go home to your _wife_."

Tala grabbed his arm to stop him reaching his car door and Kai's head snapped towards him as he threw a heated glare, whilst Tala's expression held a faint look of amusement.

"Lemme buy you a drink, just as friends."

"No." Kai spat out and attempted to rag his arm from the taller male's firm grasp.

Tala held on to him tighter, Kai's grey suit jacket becoming crinkled under his grip with his eyes still locked on his prey.

He loved it when Kai played hard to get, though never knew why he put up so much of a struggle when the outcome was always going to end in his favour.

"Just _one_. Or better yet why don't we just head back inside?" He suggested, motioning to the tall building up the steps. "All you rich business guys tend to keep a bottle of scotch or something in a drawer don't you? Just one, c'mon, what else you gonna do tonight? Is Ray back yet?"

Kai's stare broke off from the interrogating icy eyes gazing back at him that seemed to look even bluer in the moonlight.

No Ray wasn't back. Wasn't going to be back for at least another week because apparently the white tiger clan was higher up on his list of priorities than he was.

Getting nothing but silence Tala's lips curled upwards and he simultaneously cocked a brow. Kai didn't need to respond, the answer was written all over his face.

"I'll take that as a no then?"

Loosening the grip on Kai's arm Tala continued to speak out in a smug tone, "So lemme guess, you're gonna go home, shove a frozen pizza in the oven, then sulk and sob into some 'Ben n Jerry's' afterwards? Am I _really _all that bad that _that's _what you'd rather do than have a drink with me?"

Kai sent him a dull look as he straightened up his suit jacket now he'd let go of him.

He had pizza yesterday. Was gonna be a microwave meal tonight, _actually._

Tala continued to whine out, "Come onn, just one."

Taking his hands out of his pockets to hold his hands up in defence, he gave Kai a neutral expression before placing a hand on his own chest to show his sincerity. "No funny business. I promise."

The two weren't touching now but were still stood reasonably close at the bottom of the stairs. Kai's feet remaining firmly planted where he stood next to him on the pavement.

If Kai didn't know him any better he might have just believed the innocent mask Tala was currently wearing but he couldn't trust this guy as far as he could throw him.

Not now.

Not after finding out about his completely other life this afternoon.

Kai took a glance over at his car parked up before him as the amber coloured lights quickly flashed and the front LED headlights turned themselves off as the Mercedes auto locked itself again having had no response from its driver.

What _was_ he rushing home for? Really? Except for his mac 'n' cheese meal for one, and whatever shit was on T.V tonight.

Besides the crying into ice cream since that wasn't really his style, Tala had hit the nail on the head.

He really didn't have anything else better to do.

He knew that once again he was treading on dangerous ground. Should really unlock his car again, get in it and go straight home but..

Deeply exhaling through his nose Kai looked to the redhead again with the same bored expression.

"Just one."

With a wolfish grin dancing all over his face Tala held his arm out towards the darkened building behind them.

"Lead the way Mr Hiwatari."

* * *

x-x-x

With a flick of the light switch the office was lit up again. Walking in first Kai eased his grey suit jacket back off his shoulders and draped it over the arm of a black leather chair near the door.

There'd been many a time he'd still be at the office at this time of night - that wasn't the unusual part. The strange part was having someone else in here with him.

But it was just for one drink.

A farewell toast if you will.

Then they'd both go their separate ways and that would be the end of it.

'_No funny business.'_

Besides, the cat was out of the bag now. Like hell was Kai going to mess with a married man who had a kid on the way.

Whilst his own morals had been questionable up to date Kai wasn't going to be a part of destroying a child's home before it had even made it into the world.

Tala let out a whistle, following Kai into the office and took a look around as he shook off his own jacket and plopped it over Kai's haphazardly.

"So this is where the other magic happens, eh?"

Kai gave a slight shrug of his shoulders as he knelt down to open up the cabinet underneath his coffee machine and pulled out the opened bottle of whiskey.

"I guess," he muttered out.

Work was just work to him.

For years now he'd always been praised as this elite, successful, hardworking young business man but he didn't think a great deal of his achievements. He just got on with it.

Checking the place out as he walked over to the desk, Tala made himself comfortable in the chair behind it. Kicking up his feet on the desk as he leaned back, watching Kai like a predator eyeing its prey as he poured the drinks.

"Have you heard from him at all?" He poked.

Picking up the glasses and turning to face him, Kai's eyes shot straight to the bottoms of Tala's shoes. The very sight offending his eyes as he cocked a slate brow at him.

"I have.." He said in a low tone as he sauntered over to the desk and placed his glass down, retaining Tala's drink until he got the hint.

Tala cocked a brow back, "Anddd?" He drawled out, "How's the kitty doing?"

Kai tutted, swiping Tala's legs off his desk with his free hand and replacing them with a firm slam of the whiskey glass.

"He's fine." He dully replied.

If he knew this was going to turn into him fishing for information on him he'd have just got in his car and left. The last thing he wanted to do was delve into a conversation about Ray, and even if he did it wasn't like he even had all the answers.

It was fine though. Two could play this game.

Picking up his drink Kai's tone went somewhat higher as he next spoke out, almost chirpy.

"How's the wife? Heard she had a hospital appointment today?" He took a sip of his drink, his eyes focused on the man sat at his desk now watching for the reaction.

Tala smirked as he took up the glass and put it to his lips, sipping leisurely with a small groan in the back of his throat.

Kai too adopted a faint smirk as he waited for the answer he knew he wasn't going to receive.

"So what we can talk about my business but not yours?" He asked, walking to the chair opposite him and placing his drink down on the desk.

"You choose to answer me, doesn't mean I have to do the same." Tala said as he sat his glass down, leaning towards Kai with his elbows resting on the top of his desk. That wolfish grin spreading along his face.

Kai rolled his eyes.

The guy always seemed to be able to get one over on him and it was becoming annoying. But anything he _really_ wanted to know he was sure he could find out from his assistant anyway.. He already knew how the appointment went, not that he remotely cared either way.

"If you don't want to talk about the cat, then tell me about what you do here. Besides looking gorgeous in that suit of yours." Tala said as his eyes bounced up and down Kai's person.

Pulling out the opposite chair Kai sat down into it, viewing his office from a whole new angle as he looked over at the redhead in _his_ seat. He'd never let on that it, sorta, kinda bothered him - but it did.

Brushing off his compliment he took another sip of his drink and shrugged.

"Stuff."

The wolfish grin became more wry, slipping out of the chair behind the desk Tala sipped at his drink as he carried himself over to where Kai sat.

With his elbow resting on the arm of the chair Kai swirled the whiskey round in his glass, his demeanour seemingly completely unfazed though his eyes, rightly so, held their suspicions as the wolf sauntered over to him.

Their eyes stayed locked the entire way until Tala reached past Kai's shoulder to set his glass down. Pulling back to stand behind him, his hands ghosted over Kai's arms and up his shoulders.

"So tense."

Briefly catching his familiar scent as he leaned over him Kai shifted slightly when his hands made contact with his shoulders. Instantly he was reminded of the firm, almost possessive grasp the redhead held on him.

The same touch he hadn't stopped thinking about since they crossed that line the day Ray left.

"What are you doing Tala.." He tiredly questioned. It was a genuine one though Kai knew the answer already. "...Go sit down."

He'd said it but wasn't sure if he completely meant it..

"Now why would I do that?" Tala chirped as his fingers began to work into Kai's shoulders. "And unless you're going to pay me, I don't take orders from you."

"I'm pretty sure you said there'd be no funny business downstairs." Kai retorted, though deep down he was enjoying the pressure being kneaded into his shoulder blades. "We'll play this game though if you want.. How much do you want?"

Tala chuckled, "I'm only working your top stairs right now. Unless you want me to go downstairs."

Kai couldn't help but smirk on the rim of his glass at the lame joke.

He'd have made more of an effort to hide it if he knew Tala could see it, though knew he was safe with him being stood behind him.

"C'mon knock it off go sit back down," he then said more firmly and shrugged his shoulders to try get them out of Tala's grip.

"Ugh. Fine." Tala huffed as he ripped his hands away from Kai's shoulders and sauntered back to the chair behind the desk. He kicked his feet back up, just because he knew it pissed him off.

"Well damn. Be a dear and bring me my drink." He asked as he bat his eyes at him, nodding to his 'forgotten' cup on the table.

Kai bit the inside of his cheek as he took a glance at the glass and leaned more back into his chair folding his arms.

Should've just gone home to the mac 'n' cheese.

"You like this at home?" He asked with a nod of his head, gesturing to Tala's feet that were back on his desk.

"Oh God no." Tala waved his hand about the air, "She's a neat freak and a half."

"Interesting." Kai lowly said through gritted teeth, his eyes burning a hole through the bottom of Tala's shoes now.

With an idea coming to him Kai then leant over and quickly slid the glass across the desk towards him.

"Catch."

As the glass slid, Tala's eyes widened some as it reached the corner and near enough fell off as he quickly reached out and stopped it not a moment too soon.

"What a gentleman." He teased, smirking around the rim as he sipped.

Kai had a fun reckless side after all.

"So we have some drinks, but what about dinner? I'm sure you're hungry."

Kai ignored the low growl in his stomach that was only being exacerbated the more he drank. It wouldn't have been the first time he'd ordered a pizza to the office but this was no date.

"You asked for _a_ drink Tala," He then shook his glass a little at him. "And you've got _a_ drink. We don't need to drag, whatever _this_ is, out any more than it needs to be. So if you're hungry, sip up and fuck off."

He was pushing his luck now. It was a farewell drink, not a welcome home dinner.

Tala's shoulders went up and down, looking unfazed at the snippy attitude.

"Do you just like letting me around to verbally abuse me?"

"Pretty bold of you to assume I like you being around but I just give back what I receive." Kai nonchalantly said, staring at his glass now as he swirled the amber coloured liquid around again.

"If you didn't like me, you wouldn't let me around you so much. You're not the kind of guy to keep unwanted company about." Tala said almost in a bored tone, getting the rest of his drink down and smacked his lips as he slid it back towards Kai. "And I'll have another." He winked at him.

Kai's eyes trailed from his own glass to the empty one that had stopped before him, then back across to Tala just in time to catch the wink.

"One drink you said." He reminded with a slight bite to his tone.

Whilst he had nothing to rush home for he'd seen these four walls for over 12 hours now, a change of scenery would be nice.

"And you're still working on yours. What, you just want me to stare at you 'til you're done?"

"Like you'd complain." Kai muttered out before placing his glass down.

Reaching for the bottle he poured more of the liquid into Tala's cup and topped his own drink back up while he was at it. Pushing the glass back over to him Kai screwed the cap back on and placed the bottle back down by his feet before picking up his glass again.

Looking over it at Tala he spoke out in a warning tone, "We're done here after this one, understand?"

"Yes sir." Tala mocked at him as he rolled his eyes, pouting out his lower lip as he took the glass.

Kai sipped on his drink in silence now ignoring the look that was being sent his way. They had to put a stop to whatever this was. They couldn't continue it forever.

They weren't friends. Far from it.

They'd had a drunken fuck and that was it. Sure, he, for some bizarre reason Kai had yet to figure out, enjoyed being around him. But Tala had a wife, and he.. Well, he wasn't sure what he had right now but he knew it wasn't the redhead currently sat in front of him who was practically undressing him with his eyes now.

Tala's lips twitched into a smirk as he caught Kai's eyes staring back at him, he licked his lips subtly as he didn't look away and pulled himself off the chair again.

"You still look tense."

Kai groaned as he put his drink down on the table. This again?

"Can't imagine why." He said, his tone dripping in sarcasm.

"Because you don't talk about your problems." Tala chided playfully, his hands wasting no time at slithering back on to Kai's shoulders. "Now, tell Tala everything." He cooed.

Kai lightly sighed through his nose, closing his eyes for a brief moment as the pleasant tingle ran across his shoulder blades again. Tala was good with his hands, he'll give him that..

"There's nothing to tell."

Tala rolled his eyes with an audible huff, "And this is exactly what I mean. One day you're going to implode."

Kai too rolled his eyes.

He'd gone his entire life keeping any of his life's woes to himself, he was sure he'd be fine.

What was he wanting from him exactly? A list of all of the shit that was currently going on in his crazy world?

"Why do you even care Tala?" He questioned, a slight bite to his tone.

"I really don't. But it's not healthy to keep everything bottled up." He answered as he shrugged his shoulders again and dug his fingers a bit rougher into Kai's shoulders.

"I'm not keeping anything bottled up.." Kai mumbled as he closed his eyes. That same wave of pleasure coursing through him as he let his head drop a little as Tala went harder on his aching muscles. "Work's fine... Personal life's… _fine_."

"Mhmm. Sure." Tala mocked, seeing the bit of pale skin uncovering as Kai's head went forward. Smirking, working his hands, he leant down and ghosted his lips against the back of it.

"It is.." Kai attempted at sounding more confident in his response but the touch of Tala's lips against his neck caused his breath to hitch slightly, his eyes shooting back open.

Clearing his throat he continued, sounding steadier now. "Spoke to Ray earlier this afternoon, and he's wanting to stay for another week.. which is _fine_.. I'm busy here anyway at the minute."

"It can't be all that _fine_, be honest here. It's not like I'll hold it against you, or blackmail you. If that's what you think." Tala said against his neck, watching the finer hairs stand on end and goose bumps rise along his skin.

Kai's eyes slowly closed again, dropping his guard further as the tingling sensation continued to prickle at his fair skin.

He should really make a massage a regular thing, this was bliss.

"Well no.. It isn't _fine_ but, what can I do? Isn't like I own him... Can do what he wants.." He murmured out trying to hold the conversation but also wanting to just enjoy his firm touch in peace.

"You can do several things, actually." Tala started, his hands slipping around Kai's shoulders as he walked around to the front, promptly sitting down on his lap side saddle.

"Continue doing what you are and mope and brood, like you do when things don't go your way. Assert your dominance and demand he comes home, before the pink demon gets her claws in him. Or, take your ass there and drag him back yourself."

Kai blinked before raising a brow at how he'd just casually placed himself on his lap.

He couldn't just go and 'drag him back' because he didn't even know where the White Tiger Village was. Ray had never bothered to take him before, which the mere thought of that now pissed him off.

What if there was an emergency? How would he know where to even start searching?

As for asserting his dominance it was _that_ that caused him to run away in the first place..

"It'll be fine," he sighed out.

Deep down Kai knew nothing would happen between Ray and Mariah again. The small niggle of doubt wasn't aimed at Ray because he trusted him. It was _her _he didn't trust.

"I'm sure the tart can try all she likes, Ray's not gonna bite."

"I'd bite." Tala winked as he leaned closer to his lips, "But then again, you know that."

Kai pulled back a little creating distance between them again.

"Hn, no need to remind me." He replied with a scowl.

Three days it took for his lip to feel better after that assault that morning. Three days. He should've pressed charges..

"Isn't exactly a surprise though you'd fuck anything with a pulse."

"I might." Tala grinned, twining his arms around Kai's neck and his fingers playing with the strands of his hair.

"Is that jealousy I hear though?"

Kai scoffed.

"Please. If I wanted you again I'd take you." He turned his head from him avoiding his gaze and the stupid grin on his face.

"Once was enough. You might be fine with screwing around but it's not really my style."

"Was once _really_ enough though?" Tala asked in a husky breath, running his hands down Kai's shoulders and arms.

Kai pressed his lips together as his heart started to pump faster in his chest.

No. It wasn't enough.

Even though he was left royally battered and bruised he'd have another night like that in a heart-beat. But he wouldn't, couldn't, do that to Ray again. It would be the first and _last_ time he'd ever do such a thing to him.

It was a mistake, a mistake that he wasn't going to make twice.

"I…think you should go." He forced out. Knowing full well that it didn't sound at all convincing.

"You don't want one _little_ taste?" Tala taunted as he licked his lips, leaning back closer and holding Kai by the back of his neck so he couldn't move away this time.

He wouldn't force him though; he knew he didn't have to. Kai would fall into him just like last time.

Kai's lips now parted as the wolf prowled nearer. His hand gripping the back of his neck making him feel safe yet vulnerable at the same time.

Why couldn't he resist him? Why was he so weak when it came to him?

"Maybe.. just a little.."

His confession came out barely a whisper as he breathed in Tala's cologne again, it captivating him just like it had done before.

Tala licked his lips again, slow and sensual.

"Then what're you waiting for, _big_ boy?" He breathed.

Kai closed his lips, internally kicking himself for letting his thoughts slip out to him again whist willing every ounce of restraint he could muster to at least _try_ and stop this from going any further.

Why did he have to just admit that out loud? And _why_ did he have to lick his lips like _that_?!

Push him off. Tell him to leave. Get in your car and GO. HOME.

Hysterically jumping up and down on his shoulder the little angel was screaming into his ear now whilst the devil relaxed on the other side, casually looking over his sharpened claws with a smug smile dancing across his face.

Crimson stayed locked with aqua and it wasn't long before the sexual tension between them grew too much. Kai's earlier, anger, upset and frustration with Ray all hitting him at once as he grabbed a hold of Tala's shirt collar.

"After this you're leaving." He spat out before crashing his lips against his.

Yeah, that's what Kai said but the way his lips were moving along Tala's that wasn't what he wanted.

He tried not to smirk into the kiss, letting Kai get his ego boosted by allowing him control for a good while before he sunk his teeth into his lips and bit down.

"Now now, we both know who's in control here darling."

Kai winced slightly at the familiar pain in his lower lip as his eyes shot open and stared up at the wolf, awaiting his next move in silence.

This feeling.. The feeling of being over powered, _this_ is what he craved, what he couldn't get enough of.

He didn't know why he fell so submissive to him but the thought of Tala having his wicked way with him was such a turn on.

But this was _his_ office.. and _he_ was the boss.

Wrapping an arm around Tala's waist and shoving his other underneath his thighs, Kai hoisted him up bridal style with ease and dropped him on his desk. Roughly swinging his legs down to hang over the edge he then spread them and stood between them, grabbing Tala by the back of his head and pulling him in close again, his tongue wasting no time in completely tasting the entirety of his mouth.

With a hard shove Tala separated their bodies apart, discreetly trying to take back the air in his lungs. He'd be lying if he said Kai didn't turn him on when he was trying to take control over him, then again that's all he was doing.

_Trying._

And that was all he'd get from him, he wasn't the cat and about to roll over and show his stomach. He had fangs too, and he was intent on using them tonight.

Grabbing at Kai's shirt he jerked him around the desk to where he was stood in front of his chair, a few pens and papers getting knocked off as his own body turned along the top of it to follow.

"Sit." He commanded like Kai were a dog and shoved him down into the desk chair he had been occupying previously. Not giving Kai time to blink or question what he was doing, Tala slithered off the top of the desk. Doing what Kai had done to him, knocking his knees and legs apart to make room for his body to come between, he wiggled himself to his own knees in front of him.

Kai obliged without hesitation and allowed the firm push on his chest to sit him down in his chair, it creaking a little with the abrupt slam into it.

Using the opportunity to catch his own breath back Kai used both hands to quickly unravel his tie from around his neck as he watched intently as Tala settled himself down in front of him.

It was getting hot in here, the light blush on Kai's cheeks was apparent. And there was something about being in his office that made this whole thing just so much hotter. The excitement of doing this in a public place swirled in his gut followed by the comfortable and relaxed feeling of knowing that they wouldn't be caught at this time of night.

He melted into his chair, keeping the two ends of his tie draped round his neck the same way Tala's hair framed his gorgeous face.

Icy blue eyes refused to break their gaze as his hands slithered up Kai's thighs and reached for his black leather belt.

"Let's see what we can do to relieve some more of that tension, hn?" Tala teased as he began his attack on the belt buckle.

In mere seconds it was unhooked, along with the button to Kai's pants. Keeping them on and zipped up he pawed at the front of his crotch with one hand, the other slipping up as high as he could reach being on his knees. His fingers running over Kai's stomach and hips.

Kai sent a twisted smile down at him as his brain switched to animalistic mode.

Fuck a massage _this_ is what he should have more often.

He shifted in his seat trying to loosen the tightness he was beginning to feel in his grey trousers. Wanting to just take them off but also wanting to see what Tala had in store for him.

He lifted his hips to press harder against Tala's palm to try and ease some of the pressure before reaching forward to his desk to grab his drink again and down it, chucking the glass back onto the desk afterwards.

Unbuttoning his top two shirt buttons with one hand Kai's eyes too kept their lock on blue as he waited in anticipation.

Feeling the nudge under the palm of his hand Tala's eyes glistened and his wolfish smirk came back.

Literally had him in the palm of his hand.

He teased and rubbed in different intervals, first teasingly and slow then to aggressive and hard and back again. Keeping their eyes locked, watching for any and every little reaction. This was exciting to him too, he had never done something like this before. Hidden away behind a desk despite them being the only two in the building, but the thrill was still there. His mouth salivating at the meal waiting for him that was only growing more with every touch.

Kai pressed his lips together as the sense of arousal continued to wave through him. Snippets of their previous encounter playing in his mind now caused his stomach to bubble with excitement as he gazed into those mischievous eyes he hated to love so much.

Seeing Tala lick his lips again more to himself than to be suggestive, Kai spoke down to him, his voice husky, as his eyes quickly gestured down towards his crotch.

"You still hungry?"

"You have _no_ idea."

Like a dam breaking open, the previous restraint Tala had been keeping a hold on snapped.

His hands and fingers fumbling to get Kai out of his restrictive clothing as fast as he could.

It was more impressive looking the second time around.

Not wasting time he took his parted lips to the head of him, stroking and licking enough to get it wet and pushed his mouth down to take him in whole without gagging.

Kai's head fell back, his eyes rolled to a close and his mouth instantly fell open to release an exhale of air as the wolf completely engulfed him.

Just how he remembered... Absolute heaven.

They could've been doing this over an hour ago, why did he even try and fight it?

He sank into his office chair, letting one arm fall limp, and the other making its way into the redhead's locks.

A grunt broke out the moment the head nudged the back of his throat. Taking in a deep inhale Tala began to bob his head, going straight into working him hard with the barely there scrape of teeth as he went.

"Fuck.." Kai growled out as he lifted up his head and prized open his lust drunk eyes to gaze down at him, taking in the glorious sight between his legs.

Keeping the hand in Tala's hair he gripped a little tighter, moving along with him as the other quickly came up to undo another button on his white shirt.

With a long, slow, pull Tala's mouth came away. Cracking his jaw before placing butterfly kisses up and down the underside of Kai's shaft. The hunger in his eyes, in the pit of his stomach, still blazing and burning hotter.

"Do you want me?" He growled out low, squeezing around the head with his left hand, the other clawing against Kai's clothed leg he was pinned between.

Kai watched as he slowly pulled off of him, his hand falling from his hair and his mouth still gaped open as he stared back high on desire. He tried to speak though his throat had dried up completely from both the whiskey and the panting he'd been doing just now.

He dumbly nodded at him, closing his mouth finally to try and swallow before uttering a single word.

"Yes."

Both of their heads then simultaneously snapped back to the closed office door as the faint sound of a ringtone began to chime throughout the reception on the other side of it.

With a confused frown Tala then turned back to Kai whose expression matched his own.

"That's not the cat, is it?" He asked as he retracted his hands and everything from Kai so fast he knocked the back of his head against the underside of Kai's desk.

"Fucking hell!"

Kai would have snorted if his heart wasn't currently threatening to rip out of his chest. His eyes remained wide with fear as he stared at the office door.

No it wasn't Ray. He recognised that ringtone though. It was –

"Here you are! Stupid thing." Tiffany muttered to herself as she picked up the phone from her desk. "I've got it love! You can stop calling it!"

Tala's eyes went wide, a cold numbing chill running down his spine.

'_Oh for fucks sake!_'

As lovely as the woman was he was cursing Tiffany to hell right now..

Then a terrible lightbulb flickered over his head, the rush coming back now that someone was actually in the office. Kai was too busy staring at his closed door in horror to notice Tala inching his mouth back to his cock, making a loud porn star type moan as he took it back into his mouth.

Kai's breath hitched in his throat the second he felt the warmth of his mouth on him again and immediately grabbed a fistful of red hair and ragged him back off, the force causing Tala to fall back in to the wooden panel of his desk.

"Are you out of your mind?" He hissed, both his voice and his eyes retaining the same fear as he locked on to him.

Tala groaned out easing himself back up off his ass as best he could underneath the desk.

"It's just Tiff." He bit out rubbing the back of his neck that had smacked against the back of the desk. "Isn't like she'll come in if you keep quiet, shut up and chill out."

Scooting back over to him on his knees Tala took a mouthful again, licking along the underside of Kai's shaft and swirling his tongue over the tip of him, looking up to him and throwing a wink.

Whilst Tala was pushing all the right buttons Kai wasn't enjoying any of this in the slightest now. The realisation his assistant was at the other side of that door had him completely on edge and the thought of her walking in at any minute made him feel sick.

Dropping the phone into her handbag Tiffany then looked over to her female companion that had followed her up the stairs and in to the open plan space.

"I give you, Hiwatari Enterprises!" She dramatically introduced, gesturing to the dimly lit reception they were stood in. "What'dya think Bianca?"

With his mouth halfway down Kai's cock, Tala gagged and not because of the reflux. Another cold sweat rushing down his back as he tore his mouth off of him quickly, actually looking panicked.

No. Please God no.

It can't be her. A different Bianca surely. There's millions of Bianca's in this world. _His_ was not on the other side of that door.

Kai's brows furrowed as Tala retreated from him like he'd just burnt his tongue and watched all colour slowly drain from his already fair face.

"Who's Bianca?" He whispered down to him, "You know her?"

Tala nodded before he shook his head almost violently, pressing his lips tightly together to stifle any noise that dared to pass them whilst putting a finger to them to tell him to be quiet.

Seeing Tala's whole demeanour shift caused Kai to scowl down at him, his suspicions reaching a whole new high as his heart began to beat in his chest.

Now was _not_ the time to be keeping secrets from each other. They had to be a team here so they could figure out how to handle this mess!

"Well aint this a swanky place.. Really nice décor," Bianca mused as she wandered around the front reception with her arms loosely folded on her rounded stomach.

"Yeah, Kai has a really good eye for interior design." Tiffany praised as she too scanned around admiring her place of work.

Tala's breath hitched in his throat at the sound of her voice. It confirming everything.

Oh dear Lord she was actually there. The boner between his own legs, that had become unbearably painful and ignored, sunk like the Titanic.

The thrill not even in the back of his mind now as he unlatched himself from Kai again quickly, scooting himself under the desk more so he was hidden if they came in.

"Who is she?!" Kai mouthed to him as demanding as he could whilst keeping himself silent. His eyes ablaze with fear as he locked on to Tala who remained frozen on the spot.

He was losing his patience. Just cut the shit already and spill!

"Just a friend of Tiffs! She's nobody, now shut up!" Tala's mind went round in circles as he hissed at him, what the hell was he supposed to do in a situation like this?!

Kai glared down at him as his own brain began to work over time.

Tala looked scared shitless, and it was becoming increasingly obvious the relevance of this unknown woman with every cringe he subconsciously made the more she spoke with Tiffany.

Kai's lips parted as he struggled to find the words to say to him.

This was not happening right now.

"It's your wife isn't it?"

Blue eyes got wider as he hit the nail on the head, though now he wasn't sure if he should lie or not.

Slowly he nodded his head, swallowing hard as he made sure he was pulled under the desk as much as he could be. Kai's legs in the way made it more cramped, but it had to do.

"That's her..." He whispered.

The big bad wolf had shrunk into a terrified Chihuahua and Kai had no idea what to do.

"Well we'd best get going."

Turning on her heel to leave, Tiffany's brown eyes then did a double take as she caught the strip of light coming from underneath Kai's office door.

With a frown she took a glance at Bianca before calling out in disbelief, "Are you still here Mr Hiwatari?"

Kai's mouth fell open, his eyes shooting down at Tala underneath his desk in horror, silently begging for him to tell him what to do since his brain had clearly stopped working a while ago.

Tala just stared back at him, the fear clearly laced in his own eyes as he tried to make himself as small as possible underneath the desk. As good as he was at getting out of sticky situations; this was a whole different ball game that he was pretty sure even _he _couldn't talk himself out of if they were to be caught.

Getting nothing from him Kai's fear transitioned to a frustrated glare. He quietly hissed out through gritted teeth, "The fuck do I do?!"

Of all the times for Tala to be quick on his feet and have a master plan _now_ was the fucking time.

"Sir?" Tiffany pressed, "Are you there?"

Tala put his index finger to his lips and motioned for him to be quiet. The fuck did Kai want _him_ to do?!

A vein throbbed in Kai's temple.

Thanks for nothing dickhead!

With the sound of high heels now clicking towards his door Kai's eyes were transfixed on it, his heart pounding against his ribcage as the door handle began to move.

Quickly regaining some dignity and tucking his junk away he pulled himself forward, shoving his legs under the desk wherever they'd fit giving no regard to whether he was hurting Tala in the process. He then quickly straightened up his shirt having no time to button it back up as Tiffany pushed open the door and poked her head inside.

"Don't you have a home to go to?" She chuckled out.

Kai laughed out with her.

Way too loud for a joke that wasn't all that funny but he was riddled with anxiety right now. Mentally praying to every God above, whoever would listen to a man of sin that this woman didn't walk further in here to see him with his trousers undone and a man that wasn't his boyfriend underneath his desk.

Tala was sweating bullets.

Why, WHY did they have to come around? He was having a blast with Kai's cock in his mouth without a care in the world.

Mood, destroyed.

"I forgot to grab my phone from today so just swung by to pick it up." Tiffany explained pointing over her shoulder with her thumb gesturing back to her desk.

"What are you still doing here? Is there anything I can help with?" She added taking a few steps forward to enter the office completely now.

"No no! Everything's fine! I was just about to leave actually." Kai spewed out whilst grabbing some random paperwork on his desk and tapping it down to straighten it all up.

"I'll just see you in the morning, it's fine, _really_."

"Oh okay," She said, his flustered demeanour going completely over her head.

"Oh! By the way this is Bianca, y'know who I was telling you about today, who I was talking to on the phone?" She said beckoning Bianca to come stand beside her who had just waited out in the reception.

A beautiful pale face stuck in through the door over Tiffany's shoulder, green eyes bright as they did a quick look around as she brushed some light lavender hair from her face and smiled at the man behind the desk.

"Hello." She greeted.

Tala's skin pricked. What had been a pleasant dream was now a nightmare from hell.

Laying the papers down flat on his desk Kai gave an awkward nod of his head. Tala was definitely punching above his weight with her, she was a looker alright.

"Nice to meet you."

Tiffany loosely folded her arms over her chest before looking to Bianca.

"She just wanted to come along for the ride, didn't you B? The fresh air helps calm her nausea"

Bianca's eyes sparkled a little, Tiffany's words going in one ear and out the other.

He was gorgeous..

"You're the one who had some yard work done right? I hope my husband behaved himself." She chuckled lightly, though there was an undertone that said she was serious.

Tala had best be on his upmost good behaviour when dealing with a client _this_ well known.

Kai forced a light chuckle back to her though a pang of guilt shot through his stomach, his eyes unable to stop glancing down at _hers_ now. If only she knew.

"Y-Yeah he did a really good job.. and uh, congratulations to you both too." He said gesturing to her rounded belly. "If I'd have known you were both expecting I'd have given him a bigger tip."

"Never too late." She winked at him, once more sounding playful and serious. "But really, word of mouth is better. Get the word out to your business partners."

Kai gave her a half smile and his eyes shifted from her as she winked at him.

Her and Tala were well suited that's for sure, their mannerisms being almost identical though Bianca seemed to hold more subtlety. He'd clearly met his match though. Two pea's in a pod.

It was then that he remembered he had the little snake under his desk. His own twisted little light bulb suddenly shone bright.

"I will _definitely_ see what I can do." He said looking back up to her, his smile filled with confidence now. "Oh, where are my manners? Would you like a drink Bianca? Tea? Water? Help yourself ladies and rest your feet a little while."

Tala narrowed his eyes, not that Kai could see, and smacked him on the inner leg.

"Oh you're too kind, but I'm supposed to be meeting said husband for dinner. Need to update on the baby and all." She said as she pat her round stomach.

"Maybe another time?" She was full on serious this time.

Feeling the smack on his leg Kai swiftly kicked him back under the desk.

Leaning forward on his arms he sighed out in disappointment, "Ah that's a shame... Isn't every day I get two gorgeous women in here all to myself." He said with a smirk and threw a wink to the two of them.

"Another time though."

Tiffany frowned a little and took an unnoticed side glance to Bianca whose eyes were still drinking up her boss.

Was he feeling okay? He wasn't usually this flirtatious. Brown eyes then met the two empty glasses on his desk.

Bianca chuckled again, "You're sweet. Maybe we can do a double date one day? With you and Ray, I'd love to meet the man who stole you away from the rest of us. He must be very lucky."

Tala refrained from rolling his eyes. He should have never mentioned the damn cat to her.

Kai had to force a smile now that Ray had been mentioned.

The only lucky one was him and he was showing his thanks by doing _this _to him.

Ray… He hadn't even crossed his mind this entire evening.

The whole duration Tala had been between his legs he'd not given the so called man of his dreams a second thought.

A wave of guilt washed over him once more as he tried to keep his confident mask on.

"Hm..sounds good..I'll have Tiffany check all our schedules and see if we can coincide sometime."

Kai had said it but didn't mean a single word. His mood having dropped an entire octave now at the mention of Ray.

"Were you here with someone sir?" Tiffany abruptly asked.

"Hn? N-No, course not. Why? What makes you say that?" Kai blurted out. His mask being slowly chipped away the longer these meddling broads stood in his office.

"Well there's two glasses of whiskey on your desk," she plainly pointed out.

Kai's eyes then trailed down to the two tumblers.

Shit. She ain't wrong.

Tala choked on his spit, doing a double take to make sure he still had every article of clothing in place. He felt his heart snap in two. His jacket... His fucking jacket was on the chair!

Kai wracked his brain for a response, opening his mouth and closing it again as no words would come to mind.

"I uhm.. I was, in a.. meeting!" The final word being thrown out the second it arrived in his brain.

"So you _were_ with someone then?" Tiffany asked again, the scepticism in her voice reaching whole new levels now.

"Y-yes, earlier yes. I don't know why I said I wasn't.. It's been a long day." He awkwardly laughed out.

Under the confides and cramped space of under the desk Tala pulled out his phone quickly.

Silencing the thing first before going to Bianca's number. A few seconds later, just as she went to speak as her eyes were scanning around the room again, her phone went off with a text message.

"Oh, he says he's already at the restaurant. Guess we should go."

Kai would've kissed him if this whole situation wasn't his fucking fault to begin with.

"Well it's been a pleasure ladies, enjoy the rest of your evening," He said a little too quickly. An immense wave of relief washing over him as the two women shifted to take their leave.

"You too Mr. Hiwatari. Keep in touch!" Bianca called as she waddled away.

"I'll see you in the morning sir," Tiffany added before turning to the door.

Her eyes took a glance to her left to cop two jackets, one that matched Kai's grey suit and a black bomber strung over the arm of the leather chair.

She kept walking.

Deeming it just another one of Kai's to change into.

Tala let out a sigh of relief once the door closed.

Kai too let out the breath he'd been holding and pushed against the desk, the wheels moving backwards and creating enough distance for Tala to be able to get out from underneath it.

Tala, like the scum of the earth he was, crawled on his hands and knees and cracked his back from the strain he had put himself in.

"Haven't had to bend like that in about three years."

Kai stood up from his chair and pulled up his grey trousers properly, firmly pulling up the zip as he glared at him.

That was _too_ close. And this guy _still_ had room to make jokes!

"Oh don't give me that look, it's never worked on me before. You're wasting your time." Tala said as he sauntered over to his jacket, flapping it out before throwing it on.

"At least it wasn't the kitty cat. Could only imagine the look on your face then." He snickered.

"You really get a kick out of the most twisted shit don't you?" Kai bit as he watched him in utter disbelief. How the fuck was he so calm right now?!

"Next time when I say leave, _leave_!"

"Next time ey? Is that an invitation?"

Tala just smirked harder, going to him again and carelessly throwing his arms around his neck.

"N-No-"

"-Maybe you should be a bit more convincing, _next time._" He said cutting him off in a low sultry tone as he pecked his lips.

Kai automatically returned the peck but only out of his current dumbfound state.

"I didn't mean that! There is no next time Tala!" He snapped out.

They weren't doing this again.

Almost being caught by his pregnant wife was enough to make him abstain from even _thinking_ about the redhead again never mind anything more.

Tala just smirked at him. Yeah he was saying they were done but this was far from over.

Kai had a flavour he loved the taste of and had every intention of continuing to savour it for the foreseeable future.

"Mhmm… Try butter up my wife again though and you're right there won't be," Tala threatened but his smirk never wavered. "What's up, one Ivanov not enough for you?"

Kai opened his mouth to speak but let out a frustrated noise from his throat instead and just shook his head.

He had just about had it with this guy.

He'd only done that to try and save _both_ their asses since he'd become a useless mess underneath his desk. As pretty as she was, married heavily pregnant women funnily enough weren't his type.

"You're unbelievable." He managed to finally mutter out.

"But you love it." Tala practically purred as he slithered himself off.

Kai growled, "Get the hell out of my office Tala."

"Yeah, yeah I'm going." He rolled his eyes as he did as Kai commanded, stopping at the door and turning back to him.

"You have my number." He winked. "Oh, and don't even think about organising that double date." He warned before slipping out the door.

Kai threw the door a sour look once it had closed before collapsing into his office chair.

Did he think he was some kind of masochist? Why the hell would he put himself through that? Put _any_ of them through it for that matter?

* * *

x-x-x

Once Tala had made it back outside the building he welcomed the cold night air into his lungs with a deep inhale and breathed out the arrogant. His body collapsing against the glass door as he stood for a moment to collect himself.

That. Was. Too. Close.

He might have had a smirk on his face but he didn't find any of that even partially funny.

He was terrified.

He mentally cursed himself for looking so flustered in front of Kai in the moment, losing the cool character he so desperately clung on to when he was around him but he couldn't hide the fact that that situation they'd just been in was way too daring even for his liking.

Was all this even worth it?

Sure Kai was hot and easy to over-power but was his craving for dominance becoming too risky?

He hadn't minded so much until now as the dirt was always on Kai's doorstep but Bianca being there was far too close to home and it frightened him.

His reality that he was trying so hard to mask and blur merging dangerously with the fantasy he'd created.

Lighting up a cigarette for the nerves that had yet to diminish completely, he peeled himself off the door and bounced down the stone steps, heading to the restaurant he was meeting Bianca at a block away.

Wracking his brain for a reason as to why he was late when he'd already told her he was there.

* * *

A/N: _**That**_ was a rollercoaster.

Thanks to Lux for helping me with this and I hope your heart has calmed down as the problems we kept facing with this were becoming too much xD

From the two glasses to the jacket - I'm so glad Tiffany is a little bit of a ditz because we were hella sympathising with the two rats and even _we_ were wracked with fear.

Was hilarious though mate and I'm so grateful you've thrown yourself into this story as much as I have.

Til next time! K~


	12. Would I Lie To You?

A/N: Ohh this chapter.

I think I asked for opinions from every man and his dog with this one. (BB, Roy, Lux - thanks a bunch guys! Even though I needed to do a 50% rewrite, but I ain't even mad cos this is a better route!)

This all stemmed from Peanut wanting Tala to have more 'depth.'... Pfft. He's just a cheeky loveable rogue what more do ya want?! xD But thinking about it, finding out a little more about our favourite fuck boy was needed.

The song featured (believe it or not) is called "Would I lie to you?" By Charles and Eddie. It came on my iPod one morning on my way to work and after shouting "Whatta tune!" I could then just imagine Tala, sporting his wolfy smirk, being cocky as anything dancing around to it. So there you are.

Enjoy! K~

* * *

Chapter 12 - Would I lie to you?

"Do you want some tea babe?" Tala asked shaking off his bomber jacket and hanging it on one of the coat hooks in the hallway.

"Sure." Bianca curtly replied, not even looking at him as she hung up her own coat, giving Tiffany a quick kiss on the cheek and thanks for house sitting whilst they were out and swiftly took herself off into the living room in a blatant huff.

She was clearly still seething that Tala had shown up late to their dinner reservation and conversation had been kept to a minimum between the two of them during the whole meal whilst she sulked, giving simple one word answers or a brief nod or shake of her head.

Tala had apologised countless times already.

Firstly when he got there claiming he'd got the wrong address, several times during dinner and then twice on the cab trip home. But how anyone could get the wrong restaurant when it was the only Russian one in the city Bianca couldn't quite get her head around.

They'd also been there many a time before, so it just didn't make sense.

Ignoring the bite to her tone Tala took himself in the opposite direction to the kitchen and flicked on the kettle. His mind beginning to retell the events of what he was doing a few hours ago with a certain male as he stood alone waiting for the water to boil.

He should've kept an eye on the clock, but like Kai there was only one thing on his mind and that definitely wasn't whether he was going to go for the borscht or the stroganoff.

He was letting his guard down, they needed to be more careful.. Or just stop, that was always an option too.

He just can't stay away from him though. _Why_ can't he stay away from him?!

He wasn't… falling for him was he?

Pfft.

No.. that's ridiculous, it was only physical between the two of them.

Kai was _way_ too moody for his liking. He couldn't imagine actually living with that gorgeous bastard, waking up to his ridiculously good looking face every day.

No, they'd never work out.

They weren't exactly enemies but it was clear they got on each other's nerves, hardly getting along on a regular day… They got along real good when he was inside him though.. Pretty sure Kai would consider him his best friend in the right moment.

Nearly being caught though was enough to make him want to put an end to that friendship – indefinitely.

It wouldn't be hard at all to call it quits.

Just delete the guy's number and that would be it. He could go back to normal, plodding along, living the life he was being forced to lead and that would just be the end of it.

Kai wasn't exactly the clingy needy type. It wasn't like _he_ ever made the first move.

Besides earlier this afternoon Kai _never_ got in touch with him first, and even if the guy knew where he lived he would never just appear. It seemed like the younger male could just take it or leave it..

Which was why it was the perfect affair..

The wolf really was the one in control of this precarious game of chase.

Though, it was barely a chase.

Whilst Kai always did try to brush him off and play hard to get they both got what they really wanted in the end.

He just needed to lay low for a little while, that was all. Then they could carry on with this sporadic thing a little longer.

Might as well enjoy the fun for the time being 'cos when the baby comes along it'll be back to dirty diapers and sleepless nights, and then 'Kai Hiwatari' will be just another name to him.

With fresh tea Tala strolled back through into the living room to join Bianca again who had sprawled herself out on the sofa, eyes glued on her phone ignoring his presence completely.

With the hot peace offering in hand he gently placed the cup down on to the wooden coffee table in front of her and gave her a warm smile.

"Here you go beautiful," He offered.

Easing herself up, Bianca placed a fair hand onto her rounded stomach before reaching over and picking up the cup from the table.

Tucking a strand of her short lilac coloured hair behind her ear she then took a small sip before looking up to him and narrowing her eyes.

"Did you put sugar in this?" Her tone continued to hold the same bite as she queried him though she knew the answer already.

Tala cocked a red brow.

"Uh yeah just one... Like you usually have… Right?" He hesitantly questioned back after a brief pause, the current sour look on his wife's face making him unsure of himself now.

She'd always taken one sugar hadn't she? Well, when they first met she used to have two but had cut down about three years ago.

Or was that for coffee? Ugh, like he could freakin' remember.

The woman changed her likes and dislikes more than she changed her underwear, he'd never known anyone to be so fickle.

Thinking about it she'd been off coffee for a while now actually... The smell of it making her want to hurl ever since she got pregnant.

"Take it back." Bianca commanded, abruptly holding the tea out to him, "Your other wife might take sugar but I don't."

Tala's mouth then opened to snap back as his face contorted in confusion.

"Since whe-"

"-Just go make me another one Tala!" She barked cutting him off and pressed the tea cup against his stomach for him to take.

Taking it from her he sent her a silent glare before storming back into the kitchen. He was moments away from slinging the tea down the sink before he paused, an idea coming to him.

With a quick look over his shoulder to ensure that she hadn't followed him he placed the cup down on the counter and flicked the kettle on again before picking up the ceramic pot where they kept the tea bags, and then placed it back down after a few seconds.

Walking over to the refrigerator he pulled open the door and picked up the milk carton. With a bored expression now sitting on his face he took a glance to the doorway before intentionally shuffling the carton back on the shelf to make some noise before closing the door again with a slight slam hoping she'd hear it from the living room.

Once the kettle clicked off Tala took the same tea spoon he'd used earlier that he'd left on the side and stirred it around the cup, the metal clicking on the inside of the ceramic as he pointlessly swirled the tea around.

Chucking the spoon in the sink he picked up the 'new' cup of tea and walked back into the living room.

Holding it out for her Bianca snatched it off him as much as she could without spilling it, threw him a cold look in his direction and took another sip.

"Ah much better," she snidely commented with a quick forced smile. "Wasn't hard was it?"

Tala matched her sarcastic smile with one of his own though his was tainted with smugness.

"No dear, not at all."

"Googling a restaurant address must be though." She added, continuing to poke the wolf who immediately exasperated a groan.

"How many times do I have to say I'm sorry Bianca? Fuck me, let it go already." He snapped out before sending a hard stare at her legs that were stretched out over his seat next to her on the couch.

"You gonna let me sit down or what?"

Rolling her eyes Bianca pulled her legs up towards herself to allow him to sit down before immediately dropping them onto his lap once he'd sat down beside her.

"Rub my feet." She ordered as she wiggled her toes at him.

Tala looked down at the small feet that had just been abruptly shoved on to his lap then to the woman lounging and facing him to his right, sending over a silent _'You're kidding right?'_

"It's the _least_ you could do for keeping me waiting_." _Bianca dramatically added upon seeing his unimpressed facial expression and giving her feet another wiggle. "They've been killing me all day too actually so come on." She pressed.

What she'd actually done today to cause her feet to ache was a mystery to Tala as the house looked exactly the same as he'd left it early this morning to go to work.

After a few moments he caved and with a slight sigh agreed to her request figuring it'd lift her mood at least and swivelled round to face her, gently taking one of her small feet into his hands and resting the other one in his lap as he rubbed the balls of her feet with his thumbs.

Bianca exhaled a contented noise into her cup at his touch and closed her teal coloured eyes.

"Mm, I'll let you paint my toes later too if you'd like."

Tala bit his tongue, knowing that he wouldn't really have a choice in the matter and her words were actually more of a statement. - 'You're painting my toes later.'

Once again he just silently accepted what he deemed to be his punishment and mentally prayed to the lord himself to give him some patience for this woman.

The love of his life he constantly reminded himself.

"So since you're talking to me now, you gonna tell me what the hospital said?" He asked looking across to her through his two strands of red hair.

Bianca opened her eyes to him, looking over her cup.

"I never said I was back talking to you but I suppose.." She unenthusiastically replied before taking another sip of her tea. If he was really that concerned he'd have made it to the appointment but it was just a routine check-up, and work was work.

"Checked the heart beat and measured my stomach.. All is fine.. Seemed a total waste of time though since it took me longer to get there than the actual appointment was. I wasn't even in the room for 15 minutes I could've just stayed in bed." She listed off in a bored tone.

Tala slowly nodded.

Whilst he was of course glad to know everything was fine with his unborn child, he didn't understand how a 15 minute appointment meant the house had remained untouched all day.

He didn't exactly expect her to be slaving away like Cinderella but whilst he was out breaking his back and bringing in the cash surely the two dishes from dinner last night could've been washed and put away?

"So what else have you done today?" He then asked, still trying to figure out why her feet ached so much.

Bianca glanced up and pondered for a moment, thinking over where her day had so quickly gone to.

"Well after that I went to my mother's, had a mooch around town and met Svetlana for lunch, came home and watched three episodes of 'The Real Housewives of Moscow' and then went for a little trip out with Tiffany to go get her phone that she'd left at her work. Oh, and _then_ I stood for 20 minutes waiting for my husband to show up to dinner." She reeled off taking another quick dig at him before sipping her tea and staring at him waiting for his reaction.

Tala just continued to massage her feet, his pressure increasing slightly as his icy blues burned a hole through them now. He had to force his lips into a half smile as her words caused an instant pulse of anger to course through him.

It was becoming increasingly hard for him not to lose his cool with her knowing how much manual labour he had done today, (not even including Kai), and _she_ was exhausted after going for lunch and watching T.V?!

"The sooner this baby gets here Tal the better.. I'm just _so_ exhausted!" She continued to whine out, rubbing more salt into the wound.

Being pregnant really must be the most soul destroying thing ever because the way she was acting it was like he'd bestowed upon her the biggest burden one could possibly give.

He wouldn't mind, but he didn't even think they were in a good place at all to try for another but she'd practically begged him and didn't feel that he could exactly say no to her.

But hey, wasn't like he knew what it was like to be pregnant. Maybe it is ridiculously exhausting to the point picking up a dust cloth was too much, however several department store bags were totally manageable.

With his new little bundle of joy now at the forefront of his mind a certain someone's biting words flashed through.

'_Thought of any names?'_

"We'd decided on the name right? My choice this time?" Tala teased with a hint of malice, trying again to lift the mood between them a little. He knew full well what her response was going to be but he loved winding her up all the same.

Bianca scoffed before throwing him a sneer.

"Tala, we are _not_ naming our baby Maximus Decimus Meridius... and you know we're having another girl so don't act stupid.."

The small smile faded from his face at the realisation she was clearly in no mood for a bit of light humour tonight either.

Of course though, how could he forget?

He must have suppressed the painful thought of having yet another demanding female in this house - must have completely evaded him.

"Who in their right mind would want to name their kid after some Roman guy anyway.." She tutted, "It was a stupid movi- OW!"

"Whoops, sorry!" Tala sung out, softening the grip on her feet again after he purposely dug his thumb in to the arch of her foot. "And he was actually Spanish FYI."

"Like I care." Bianca snarled, sharply removing her left foot from his grip now and giving him her right.

Tala was of course joking about the name suggestion. They'd be choosing a traditional Russian name like they did with their first. He just wanted to lift the weird tension that had loomed over the two of them now for months and go back to how they were before.

Ever since Bianca got pregnant she seemed to lose her playful side completely. They'd be fine one minute and then the next she'd be ripping his head off over the slightest thing_. _He was growing beyond tired of it but every time he'd defend himself and snap back at her she'd usually start crying and the whole thing just got brushed under the carpet even though she'd be the one who started it in the first place.

"And besides, _I'm_ the one that's carried her for 9 months, it's _my_ body that's being ruined so like _hell_ are you getting the privilege of naming her." She added looking away from him now and taking another sip of her tea.

She just couldn't tolerate him half the time nowadays.

He just infuriated her.

Always trying to be the joker and _never _taking anything seriously. Did he not realise having a child was a huge deal and should be treated as such?

Tala suppressed an eye roll and just kept quiet.

'_Sure baby whatever you say.'_

After a few moments of silence between them with just the sound of the T.V in the background, his phone vibrated in his jean pocket.

Momentarily stopping the massage he kept one hand on the top of her foot as the other pulled his phone out to check the screen; a slight smirk appeared on his lips as he read the message.

As her green eyes watched him like a hawk, upon seeing his lightened expression she glared at him and sharply spoke out.

"Who's that? Who's messaging you at this time of night? Hm? Who is she?"

Tala cocked a brow as he slipped the phone back into his pocket and went back to rubbing her feet.

"It's just Dimitri babe.. just sent something funny." He plainly responded.

"Oh yeah? Pass it here, let me see." She demanded, holding out her hand to him and beckoning for the phone with her fingers.

He gave her a bored look before retrieving his phone again and turned it around to clearly show her the screen.

"Happy?" He sighed out.

Squinting her eyes to take in the screen, she saw that it was in fact Tala's old high school friend that had messaged him. Some stupid meme that she didn't understand.

Rolling her eyes she took another sip of her tea, a sheepish look now sitting on her fair face.

Placing the phone down on the table beside them Tala exhaled and gently pushed her feet to the side of him off his lap and leaned forward on his knees to place a kiss on her stomach.

"Can I get you anything?" He softly asked looking up at her, his two strands of red hair framing either side of his face.

Bianca slowly shook her head at him, silently gushing a little inside as he kissed her stomach. That was sweet.

Setting himself back into the sofa he exhaled, clearly fed up.

"You've gotta stop this Bianca, it's not healthy."

Staring into the cup she was holding with both hands now she breathed in the tea before exhaling through her nose. A noise of agreement sitting in her throat.

"I don't know what's wrong with me Tal.. Think it's my hormones or something.."

Tala sat back into the couch, lifted his arm up and motioned for her to cuddle up to him with a quick tilt of his head.

She shuffled over to him and leaned into him, being careful not to spill her tea and rested her head on his chest as he wrapped his arm around her holding her in close to him.

"Well mind telling them to fuck off and let you get off my back? I get that this is a huge thing for you babe but for months now you've been acting, well, crazy. It's pushing us apart."

"I just don't understand though how a thorn bush can mark you up like that." Bianca quickly retorted, going back to a previous argument of theirs from a week ago as her lilac brows knitted together in confusion.

Tala groaned and rested his free hand on his nose. Not this again.

"Welll, I don't know what else to tell you babe. I told you what those marks on me were."

He then gestured to his phone in front of them on the wooden table.

"D'you want me to call the guy who watched me fall 20ft and have him confirm it all for you?"

Bianca slowly shook her head, "No it's _fine,_ I believe you."

Good, 'cos he was pretty sure Kai wouldn't have appreciated a random phone call from him at this time, especially after the situation they were in earlier, and even more so as he hadn't prearranged a false conversation with him and wasn't sure if the fellow Russian would be as quick on his feet as he was to come up with a believable story.

"Then stop it with the accusations B. The way you are lately I'd have to be pretty damn skilled to cheat on you.." He then began to count on his fingers, "Checking my phone every two minutes, smelling me and my clothes when I get in from work, calling my friends asking them where I really am... It's getting too much babe." He spoke in a firm yet fed up tone as he rested his chin on her head and stroked her arm to comfort her.

He truly felt like an absolute asshole for gas lighting her like this. Especially since _now _she wasn't exactly wrong with her claims.

But all these wild allegations of hers had been going on for around two years now. Before he'd even _met_ Kai.

He couldn't breathe with her; Hadn't for a while.

Sure he was always out, but he was genuinely working. Earning money so that he could provide for his growing family.

Tala had meant every word he'd said to Bianca on their wedding day but having being constantly accused and getting verbal abuse for things he hadn't done, never _dreamed_ of doing, he'd figured he'd might as well make all the punishment he received on the daily worth it.

The worst part? He didn't feel all that guilty for it.

He loved Bianca but he wasn't _in_ love with her. Hadn't been for some time now.

Deep down he figured they both knew it but neither wanted to admit it. She'd somehow managed to convince him that having another baby would help fix their marriage.. What a stupid idea that was.

Bianca just sat in silence, nuzzling her head into his chest as a feeling of embarrassment washed over her.

It really did sound like she was psychotic when he'd listed all she does out loud. But the way Tala had been acting the past few weeks, it was just different.

Nothing major, in fact so minor that when Tiffany had asked her about it earlier on this evening she couldn't really explain it to her. But he just seemed... happier?

[x]

"Well of course he's happy silly! He has a baby on the way!" Tiffany reassured her before reaching over the gear stick and patting her stomach. "And we're all so super excited to finally meet you little lady so hurry up!"

Bianca forced a smile, staring out of the car window before awkwardly folding her arms and resting them on her rounded belly. "I don't know Tiff, he just seems way too, _nice_ lately.. I can't put my finger on it."

Tiffany laughed out her words as she retracted her hand and placed it back on the steering wheel, "Wait, so your first thought is _'_cheating' because your husband of three years is being _nice_ to you?"

"_Too_ nice." Bianca added, raising a finger at her.

Tiffany rolled her brown eyes before shaking her head.

"Come on B, you're being ridiculous. You're heavily pregnant." She stated gesturing back to her stomach again in case she had forgotten.

"Give the guy a break he's just trying to be there for you.. Sure you guys have had your ups and downs in the past but he adores you! That's clear as day! I really doubt he's cheating on you."

"Hmm.." Bianca responded with an unconvinced noise from her throat.

"Just 'cos I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm broken Tiff. He doesn't have to do _everything_ for me.."

Tiffany tutted at her before waving her hand at her, "The kid can't win with you. If he did nothing for you you'd complain at that too."

Bianca tried to suppress a smile. She wasn't wrong, she'd rip him a new one.

Taking a glance at her Tiffany noticed the slight smirk on her face and pointed at her.

"See, you know it's true so just relax! Hell, if I had a guy do anything and everything for me when I was pregnant I'd be keeping my legs crossed and enjoy it for as long as I could! Who knows, once baby comes along it might all stop!"

Bianca rolled her eyes at the empty threat. It wouldn't stop. Deep down she knew Tala was a good man and knew he'd do anything for her regardless if she was pregnant or not, like he had done ever since they first started dating.

He was a total gent.

She just didn't understand why he continued to treat her like a queen when she was acting like a complete witch.

"I just don't understand why he's so good to me.. I don't know I just.. don't feel like I really deserve it."

"Oh stop it, now you're just being daft." Tiffany scolded, "You're beautiful, smart, funny, a total joy to be around – When you're not being crazy.." She quickly added in a low voice.

"But he's just lucky to have you! Also, Bryan would break his legs if he ever did anything to upset you so chill out girl!"

Bianca chuckled.

She remembered her brother had made Tala that promise on the morning of their wedding day. Bryan had laughed the words off immediately, deeming them to be a light hearted joke but the firm grip of that hand shake with the redhead reinforced them to be a serious warning.

"Suppose you're right," she sighed out with a smile.

Tiffany pulled up and parked the car in front of a very familiar black Mercedes.

"Is he _really_ still here?" She suddenly questioned out loud more to herself.

Bianca cocked a brow. "Hm?"

Pulling the key out the ignition Tiffany gestured to the car in front of them before unfastening her seatbelt. "That's my boss's car."

Both women got out of the car and Bianca's eyes took in the impressive vehicle beside them before letting out a whistle.

"Damn, is he still taken?"

Tiffany fake gasped before laughing and hitting Bianca's arm, "You're a married woman are you not?!"

Bianca just shrugged with a smirk as the two walked up the stone steps towards the seemingly empty building.

"Depends who's asking.. Don't think he's here though with all the lights off?"

Tiffany took out her keys from her coat pocket and unlocked the front glass door.

"Hmm maybe he took a cab home or something.. Shame, you could've finally seen him in the flesh.. I saw that little twinkle in your eyes when you checked out his Facebook page." She teased nudging Bianca's side with her elbow.

Bianca bashfully smirked, rubbing her ribs as the two made their way up to the reception. "Shut up, no there wasn't!"

"Pfft.. There so was," Tiffany scoffed as she continued to sing out her words, "I've known you long enough B to know when you like what ya see!"

Bianca rolled her eyes, her smirk still prominent. "Well whatever, just 'cos I'm married doesn't mean I'm blind. He's hot as fuck, can't deny that.. As if you get to look at him every day... Ugh so jealous." She swooned.

Tiffany giggled.

Whilst she couldn't disagree that her boss was indeed a fine specimen of a man she was completely immune to him and didn't fawn over him like the majority of women that came in contact with him did.

It was probably for that reason why Kai had kept her on as his assistant. All of his previous ones becoming too flustered every time he locked eyes with them or uttered a single word.

"Hey if he _was_ here we could get his input on all of this, see if he can give us a male perspective on Tala's behaviour." She added pressing her lips together to suppress the laugh about to erupt from her throat again. The thought of Kai responding with a quick furrow of his brows at the question and an awkward shrug filled her mind.

Bianca groaned and rolled her eyes, "I am _not_ getting relationship advice from Kai Hiwatari."

Tiffany laughed out again, "Yeah him and Tala are nothing alike anyway. Kai wouldn't have a clue."

[x]

* * *

Bianca was completely engrossed in her phone as she sat playing candy crush whilst Tala was slouched on the sofa next to her flicking through the television channels.

The evening had become as dull as it usually did and the two were just sat doing their own separate things in complete silence.

Having exhausted most of the stations, Tala tried his luck with the music section and stopped on a 90's music network, instantly flashing his teeth as the old familiar tune played out through the surround sound.

"What a tune!" He called out in delight and bopped his head to the beat.

Bianca glanced up from her phone to the T.V, she couldn't remember the last time she heard this song but it was indeed a good one.

"C'mon get up," Tala said to her with a smirk bounding off the couch and holding his hand out to her.

Bianca frowned her brows at him but a smile tugged at her lips. What fresh hell was this?

"Uh, I'm okay thanks hun, the hell are you doing?"

"Look into my eyes, can't you see they're open wide, would I lie to you baby, would I lie to youu? Oh yeah!"

Tala sang out the words as he danced around the living room using the remote as a microphone.

Bianca quickly put a hand to her face to muffle the laugh that was trying to escape her.

No, they weren't friends yet, he _can't_ see that she's finding him even remotely entertaining right now. He was such an idiot.. But she loved him nonetheless.

"Song's kinda fitting don't you think?" Tala teased throwing a wink her way. "It's _practically_ my theme tune for you." He theatrically said before continuing to sing along in to his remote.

"Don't you know it's true, girl, there's no one else but you, would I lie to you baby? Yeahhh"

Bianca tried to supress the ever growing smirk on her lips; not appreciating the blatant digs at her but she could see the funny side now if he could.

Shimmying over to her on the couch again sporting his wolfish grin he reached down and took her hand.

Locking her fingers with his she let go of her phone allowing it to drop on to a cushion and let him pull her up off the couch and lead her into the centre of the living room.

Turning up the volume on the television Tala then chucked the remote on to the sofa and spun her around, "I'm telling you baby you will never find another _girl_, in this heart of mine!"

Bianca couldn't hold back her grin anymore and flashed him her teeth as she laughed out and lightly hit his chest but allowed him to sway her from side to side to the rhythm of the song.

"You're an idiot Tal."

With a hand on her waist he cupped the other underneath her jawline and gently pulled her in as close to him as her bump would allow.

"Yeah but you love it really don't you?" He purred into her ear sending a tingle along her fair skin before placing a few soft kisses along her jaw and down her neck.

Bianca giggled as Tala straightened himself up again so he could look at her, the two of them sharing a warm smile as they still swayed from side to side.

Breaking them apart Tala then twirled her around before her teal eyes met a toddler that was now standing at the living room door with a thumb in her mouth and her other hand in a small fist rubbing her icy blue eyes.

With a gasp Bianca retracted her hand from his hold and quickly grabbed the remote on the sofa and turned the TV off with a firm press of the button.

"You've woke her up Tala well done." She hissed out at him.

Tala rolled his eyes.

Well that was nice while it lasted.

Walking over to his daughter in the doorway he squatted down to her level and gave her a warm smile, stroking her little head as he spoke out to her.

"I'm sorry princess, did we wake you up?"

The toddler whose hair was up in two pig tails the exact same shade as her father's sleepily nodded to him before raising up her little arms to him.

Cupping his hands underneath them he rose back to his feet and lifted her up with him, holding her to his chest with her small face rested on his shoulder, her icy blue eyes slowly coming to a close once again.

"I'll take her back up," he announced in a whisper to Bianca and gestured to the steps with a side nod.

Carrying the small child back upstairs Tala entered the darkened room and over to the wooden cot that sat in the far right corner. How she'd even got out was a mystery - little Houdini.

Leaning forward, gently placing her down onto her back she stirred slightly, her little facial features screwing up momentarily as she adjusted before relaxing the second he pulled the soft pink blanket back over her tiny frame.

Straightening himself back up he loosely folded his arms and rested them on top of the cot as he lovingly gazed down at her.

There was definitely no denying the kid. She was the spitting image of him through and through. Adopting everything from his red hair to the way they both furrowed their brows.

He adored her with every fibre of his being. She just came along way too soon.

He and Bianca had only been dating for 7 months when she had spat out the announcement during one of their frequent heated arguments.

The way his face dropped upon hearing the news and how his stomach churned was a memory he'd probably never forget.

He was actually fixing to break up with her during that row. She'd accused him of being too friendly to the waitress that had served them dinner that evening, but Bianca was the one to speak first.

Once Natalia was born Bianca's brother Bryan, who had just been released from prison having served six months for assault, was the first to knock on their door to welcome his new niece and after some _encouragement_ \- His now new brother in law.

Two months after Bryan's persuasion and having saved up for a ring, Tala had asked Bianca to be his wife and eight months after that the two were married. A big white wedding she'd spent her entire life planning where Tala was just told the time, the place.. and the price.

Their relationship wasn't all that bad. They'd had plenty of good times. A nice home, good sex life. But the two often clashed. Their personalities being all too similar.

As the weeks turned to months, and the months turned to years, Tala had gotten used to simply biting his tongue when it came to her as all he wanted was a quiet life.

Bianca truly was impossible sometimes and he didn't want Natalia growing up in the same kind of volatile household that he did.

All he could remember from his childhood before his mother left was her and his father going at it, having blazing rows on the daily over money and other stupid shit and he'd be damned if his daughter were to have the same painful memories.

He couldn't leave Bianca no matter how unhappy he was. He also knew full well she would be the malicious type that would stop him from seeing his daughter regardless of how much child support he paid just to spite him.

He knew what he was doing was wrong. And if anyone did to Natalia what he was doing to Bianca he'd get more than six months in a cell. But he was tired of feeling small, belittled by both his wife and her family. He needed to feel like a man. Be the one finally in charge and have some dominance.

He'd hit the jackpot with Kai. A powerful business man with more money than sense who crumbled underneath his touch.

Kai made him feel almost godly and he loved how that felt - couldn't get enough in fact.

They'd stop this eventually. Of course they would. But for the time being he had to keep tasting that power.

"Make sure you take out the trash and wash those dishes before coming to bed," Bianca said in a low voice from the doorway having come upstairs to take herself off to bed.

"Alright," Tala responded in a monotone, keeping his back to her with his eyes still locked on the tiny bundle that was the only thing giving him the strength he needed to keep dealing with all this.

Bianca then took herself off into their adjacent bedroom and quietly closed the door.

Sighing through his nose Tala took out his phone and brought up Kai's text thread.

Many of the texts had been deleted, leaving only the initial innocent correspondence from when he'd first finished the yard work.

T: [When are u next free?]


	13. Welcome Home

A/N: That time again?

Glad to see everyone enjoyed getting a little snippet of Tala's POV and why he is the way he is. (Even though most of your opinions of him remained unchanged.. *Attempt at redemption failed* xD )

Fuck y'all he's still my son and I love him! :(

But for real thank you all that are still following this absolute shit storm and take the time to review. You all make my day honestly - and once again many thanks to Ms. Lucks for the help with this.. ;) She loves meee.

Also happy birthday to BB! Dedicating this chapter to you.

Hope everyone enjoys the return of our favourite nekojin!

K~

* * *

Chapter 13 Welcome Home

On the surface he looked just like any of the other thirty or so people that were stood waiting to pick up their loved ones from their travels. But inside, Kai's heart was pounding so violently against his ribcage he wasn't sure if he should leave the airport immediately and go get it checked out by a medical professional.

He wasn't expecting Ray to call him again so soon. Not after he'd hung up on him after that awful phone conversation.

He was expecting him to be gone for at least another week like he'd told him, but the following day having received a call from a pay phone early in the morning asking if he would pick him up from the airport that same late afternoon.

Of course he would. It would be the least he could do for him.

Any minute now Ray would walk through that gateway and they'd be going back home. Back to the home that they'd spent the last two years making theirs, renovating and creating memories all for him to royally tarnish in one evening.

But Kai didn't just screw up once, oh no. He even dared to let his rage try justify his actions a second time after said awful phone call and if it weren't for Tiffany coming back to the office last night who knows how far it'd have gone.

He was an asshole… an absolute asshole.

Any initial anger he felt towards Ray leaving were completely outweighed by the overwhelming amount of guilt that sat in the pit of his stomach now as he waited.

How was he going to face him? How could he look in to those beautiful golden eyes and pretend he didn't screw another man in their house, in their bed?

That's exactly what he was going to do though.

Pretend it never happened.

He couldn't tell Ray. How could he? It would destroy him… It would destroy _them_.

No.

He was going to erase all of it from his mind.

Every suggestive text message, every dirty picture, every kiss.

Suppress those memories like he did with his shitty childhood.

Tala? Tala who?

None of it was ever going to be repeated, so why bring it up? Why break Ray's heart over something that was _never_ going to happen again?

It was a mistake.

A one-.. two off… Three if you count what happened in the club bathroom but Kai wasn't even sure if anything did happen then! He was trashed!

Taking out his phone he went to his contacts and without hesitation deleted Tala's number.

He had no intentions of seeing him again now, the yard was completed so why would he need it?

What Ray doesn't know won't hurt him. He's back now, and they were going to be together forever, live happily ever and that was that.

Whatever that was with Tala was over. Done. Finished. Finito.

End of story.

Kai's mental battle with himself came to an abrupt halt as people slowly but surely started to make their way through the arrivals gate.

Big smiles, some tears and many warm hugs as reunion after reunion occurred in front of him.

Coyly placing his phone back into his pocket Kai folded his arms over his chest as his eyes hesitantly began to scan the crowd.

It wasn't long before he caught the sight of him.

His long black hair tied back in its usual fashion, pulling one case along on its wheels and carrying his duffle bag in the other. Just how he'd left him twelve days ago.

Taking in as much air as his lungs could hold Kai exhaled an unsteady breath. His attempt to fix his nerves epically failing as he watched Ray get nearer and nearer.

Ray wandered through the sea of people, his tired eyes searching for the face he both needed to see but wanted to avoid.

He'd not slept at all last night, completely flooded with disgust at himself for what he had done. As the saying goes, curiosity killed the cat, and if Kai were to find out about Mariah it would surely break his heart. Especially because of his original suspicions before he even left for China.

Why was he always right?!

It was like he had a sixth sense and just knew everything! Ever since they were kids Kai had been the same endless pit of wisdom. It was annoying..

Maybe Kai already knows...He seemed pretty convinced of the fact before it even occurred so maybe the second those crimson eyes laid upon him he'd be able to read him, see the guilt written all over him like a tattoo. Read him not just like a book, but one of those cheap magazines that would hold the trashy headline of how 'Ray Kon slept with his ex-girlfriend because he felt a little upset.'

God it sounded pathetic.

After a minute or so he saw him, stood leaning against one of the walls, away from everyone else with his arms folded waiting for him.

He'd must have seen him first as his eyes were already transfixed on him, holding a somewhat soft gaze by the looks of it.

Kai couldn't know, 'cos if he did surely it'd be more of a hard glare being thrown his way now, and let's be honest, he wouldn't have even turned up to the airport if he knew.

He'd have just left him there to rot like the absolute trash he was.

Ray hadn't felt this kind of confliction since the final world championships. When it was a choice between staying with the BladeBreakers or leaving to go back to the White Tigers. He felt a traitor then.. but this, this was just so much worse.

Does he tell him or not? Tell him or not?

The two males awkwardly watched the other as Ray ambled closer and closer. Both forcing a faint smile on their faces with the same thought passing through their minds;

'_He can never find out.'_

Loosening his arms from his chest Kai swallowed before clearing his dry throat.

"Hey.."

Ray shifted his bag, his hands feeling clammy as he looked up at him and forced a smile and the bile in his throat to go down.

"Hey." He parroted.

Kai's eyes then broke away from his.

He remembered a time when he could spend hours gazing into those golden pools but the direct contact made him nervous for some reason now.

"I'll uh, get that for you," he said as he reached down for his duffle bag.

"It's okay!" Ray shouted, not meaning to, but it came out before he could stop it and pulled the luggage away from Kai's reach.

Kai's hand retracted away from the bag like it'd burnt him, his eyes widening and lips parting though he had no words for the unexpected outburst from the shorter male.

"I mean, I got it. It's fine." Ray added more nervously, "Let's just get out of here, go home."

"..Sure," Kai managed to say with a nod, awkwardly shifting the scarf around his neck to give his hand something to do before putting both hands in his pockets.

Ray arched a brow; he hadn't worn that thing in years.

He had noticed it, just didn't think it was appropriate to question right at that very moment though. And he always did look good in it.

He couldn't ogle too long though, he needed to get home.

Wash the stench of the village, of her, off his skin before he got sick.

Normally he'd take Kai's hand, but the moment he thought about it he just continued to grip onto the handles of his bag, heading as fast as he could to get out of there, it was suffocating him almost.

"So... good flight?" Kai asked breaking the silence, the two of them heading towards his car that was parked not far from the entrance.

He was never usually the one to make conversation but he couldn't relax, his fingers fumbling with themselves in his pockets as they walked.

It wasn't like Ray to be so quiet but he figured he was just tired from the journey, that, or he still hated every inch of him which was completely understandable also.

"Sure." Ray answered, his head down and eyes focused on just getting him to the car as quickly as possible.

Kai took a quick side glance at him before pressing his lips together.

He couldn't stand this.

Why was he being so short with him? Was getting a little hard to not take it personally when Ray had barely said two words to him since he saw him.

Taking the key fob out from his pocket he unlocked the car and opened up the trunk.

"Go sit in the car, I got this." He offered, trying his luck again at helping and held his hand out for Ray to pass him his luggage.

Ray paused, though passed him his things and went to do as he said.

Maybe the bit of time away would help him breathe, figure out what to do now that he was home and he had to face Kai now.

He slipped into the passenger seat, fiddling with his hair over his lap quietly as he watched Kai from the rear view mirror.

Thankful that he'd actually let him assist this time Kai took his bags and lifted them into the trunk before reaching up and bringing the door back down to a firm close.

He inhaled deeply before releasing another shaky breath.

The thought of going back to the house with Ray was making his feel nauseous. Like his dirty secret was just going to be painted on the front door when they pulled up.

It was going to be fine. He'd hired two maids a few days ago that had completely blitzed the house from top to bottom. The place was spotless.

'_Breathe Kai.'_

Giving himself a moment he made his way to the driver's side and opened the door to get in. He avoided looking at Ray entirely as he pressed the start-up button, the engine purring as the car came to life, released the hand break and drove away from the airport.

The second they were on the road the silence got thicker between them, yet Ray wasn't sure how to stop it from growing.

What kind of fool had he been, to do this to them? To bring this between them the way he had. He had wanted space, not a complete breakup.

"Kai?" His small timid voice called, trying to swallow his nerves to get a hold of himself.

It wasn't like he would know, if he just kept his mouth shut, then everything would be as if nothing happened.

"Hn?"

Kai threw a quick glance towards Ray before his eyes went back to the road in front of them.

He could almost hear his heart thumping away in his chest now as his own nerves were slowly getting the better of him again, anxious for what Ray's next words were going to be.

"I missed you..."

It wasn't a lie, but it tasted like it was.

It took a minute before he finally kicked himself hard enough that he reached over, taking up Kai's free hand in his and laced their fingers together before giving his hand a small squeeze.

A wave of relief washed over Kai upon hearing his words and feeling his soft hand now entwined with his.

"You did?" He almost blurted out as he stroked his thumb over Ray's hand and gave him another glance.

He didn't mean to sound so surprised but the reception he first received from him in the arrivals lounge had kind of suggested otherwise.

"Of course I did." Ray chuckled slightly.

Was he even allowed to miss him the way he had, after all he had done?

On one hand he was conflicted about the whole mess, if he had missed him that much then he would have gone home sooner, before it happened.

On the other hand, he wouldn't have missed him at all if he just hadn't gone.

"Sorry, for earlier... Just a bit stressed still from flying. Screaming kids in my ears."

He tried to keep the silence from coming back, it was a long drive and even longer if they weren't talking.

Hearing Ray laugh brought a small smile to Kai's lips though the permanent feeling of guilt he held now swirled in his stomach.

Ray was fine with him. Absolutely fine. _They_ were fine. He'd had nothing to worry about.

But the smile Ray just gave him was the same damn smile he had on the photo on his bed side table which caused a flashback of Tala's face, hovering over his, to then vividly cross his mind.

As long as he just kept his cool and just went on as normal, that night would just become a faded memory and then eventually not a memory at all.

"It's ok," Kai said brushing it off.

He then racked his brain for something else to say for he too didn't want the awkward silence to loom over them in such an enclosed space.

"You uh, you hungry or anything? We can stop off somewhere if you want? Anywhere you wanna go."

Ray shook his head, squeezing Kai's hand again.

"I just wanna go home, get in a shower and maybe pass out for a few hours."

Kai nodded, his eyes firmly on the road in front of them.

It wasn't an unreasonable request but he kind of wanted to delay the inevitable of going back to the house so soon. If all Ray wanted to do was sleep though he could deal with that. At least he could relax a little away from him and get used to the idea that he was home again now.

"I, missed you too, by the way.." he added, remembering that he hadn't actually said it back to him.

Ray's chest tightened, his breath hitching in his throat.

He didn't deserve to be missed, not after what he had done. He squeezed his hand a little tighter, as if Kai was going to just jump out of a moving car and let him crash.

He then cleared his throat a little, "How have you been?"

Kai took a glance down at their hands to check that his hadn't turned blue. He didn't want to say anything though as his mind was now preoccupied with answering Ray's question.

How had he been?

An absolute wreck when he had first left and then apparently a spiteful cheating prick the second his tears had dried, a raging workaholic after that and now just a flustered mess.

He really hoped his next words came out convincing.

"Okay, just, been busy with work and stuff. Y'know what it's like."

Ray made a face, yeah, he did know.

That was one of the reasons he left.

What was the point of being home when you were made to feel invisible until it was convenient?

"Take a break today, okay?" He asked hopefully, he didn't know how much more he could ask of him.

He wasn't deserving of what he was getting right now and it was eating him alive.

They'd be home soon and hopefully by then he'd have gotten over his conflicting feelings, be able to make things right. It wasn't going to happen again, a one-time slip up, everyone makes mistakes.

Heaven knows he forgave Kai for so many, yet... None of them could ever truly compare to what he had done.

"Maybe after some rest, we can go out to dinner?" He suggested.

If it kept Kai from working and make things better he'd suffer waking up early from a nap to go out.

Kai sent him a nod.

With Ray being home he'd had no intentions of doing any work today anyway. But from now on whatever Ray wanted, Ray was going to get.

A bubble bath? He'd run him three.

A massage? He'd hire the best masseuse in the country.

He'd do _anything _for him, so long as it could shake off even half of the guilt he was feeling right now.

"If you're feeling up to it babe? Whatever you want."

Several more minutes passed of idle conversation and the Mercedes finally pulled up in the driveway.

Kai swallowed hard before releasing his seatbelt and opening the car door before turning to Ray.

"I'll get the bags, you go on ahead inside."

Ray gave him a small appreciative smile and did as he was told, "Don't take too long."

Kai returned the smile with a soft one of his own as his eyes took a quick glimpse down at Ray's lips. Pausing for a second he swallowed again before quickly shaking off what instinct almost had him do, got out of the car and walked round the back to the trunk.

Ray didn't deserve to have his perfect lips tainted with such filth. He couldn't bring himself to degrade him the way he'd degraded himself each time he'd spent with _him_.

Ray saw the hesitation, deciding not to push as similar thoughts came to his mind. He didn't deserve Kai's perfect lips right now. He had to rinse his mouth out with bleach first and set fire to the clothes she'd touched.

Stepping out of the car he went up to his home, taking it all in as if it were the first and last time he'd ever seen it.

Kai lifted up the trunk door, pulled out the bags and placed one on the floor to be able to pull the door back down with his free hand.

Picking the bag up again he watched Ray walk up to the front door.

Anxiety danced around his stomach again now as the ridiculous image of Tala being stood on the other side of the door ready to greet Ray played in his mind. His twisted smug smirk plastered on his face.

_You're gonna cum again, and this time you're going to look at him._

Why was he torturing himself like this?!

He tried to block out the wolf's words as he stared at the back of Ray's head. Feeling more nauseous the closer he got to the door..

Ray opened it up and walked inside.

A small smile crept on his face at the familiar sight and smell of his home.

It was usually just him that ever bothered lighting the candles around the place but with the smell of jasmine lingering throughout he could tell that Kai had been making an effort in his absence.

Wandering into the living room his amber eyes continued to take everything in again.

Everything was so… tidy? Had Kai even been living here since he'd been gone? He must've practically broken his back making it spotless for his return.

Venturing over to the French doors Ray peered out into the yard.

Yep, same as it was when he left it.

Though?

His brows furrowed as he caught sight of a cigarette butt on the paved floor about three feet from the door.

Besides his cologne he couldn't smell anything on Kai when he first saw him, and even in the close proximity of the car he didn't get a whiff of tobacco. His strong sense of smell would definitely have alerted him if he'd taken up smoking whilst he was gone..

He shrugged it off. The wind must have just blown it in from somewhere.

Heading upstairs to shower he sent Kai a small smile as he walked past him.

Sending his own back Kai felt that he could breathe slightly easier now that he was alone.

Carrying the luggage up the stairs he contemplated his own shower as he felt dirtier with every step he took.

Pushing the bedroom door open with his foot Kai edged into the room to not scuff the doorway with the two bulky cases.

Placing them both down on the carpeted floor, the lust he'd shared with another man seemed to linger on the walls as his eyes scanned around the vacant bedroom.

He'd not stayed in their bedroom since that night and had been sleeping either on the couch or in one of the spare bedrooms. Even after the frantic change of sheets the next day this room just made him feel uncomfortable now.

With the sound of the shower running in the en-suite bathroom the floodgates opened and whether he wanted it or not the flashbacks of the first night with Tala flooded Kai's mind like a tidal wave.

'_It aint gonna suck itself.'_

Tala had been standing right there, his bare feet on that very section of carpet by the bed with his fingers gripped in his slate hair as he was down on his knees in front of him.

Kai's cheeks started to warm as the scene replayed in his mind. He loosened his scarf slightly, it feeling tight around his neck all of a sudden.

The only reason he was even wearing it after all this time was due to one of those damn love bites Tala had given him still sitting on his skin.

It was hardly there now. The original purple patch barely even noticeable but his conscience deemed it as obvious as the nose on his face.

'_Bet his hand could never hold all of you like __**this**__.'_

Crimson eyes glazed over as he continued to plummet further and further into the fantasy.

He hadn't been able to stop thinking about that night since it happened and being all alone with the redhead again in his office last night only refuelled that desire for it to happen again.

He could lie and say he tried to resist him but for a second time he'd allowed his anger and upset at Ray take over his better judgement, easily landing him in another precarious situation with the wolf.

It was like he'd tried a drug for the first time and instantly became addicted; he craved that same high again.

'_Do you want me?'_

Kai's teeth subconsciously sunk into his lower lip as he played out the moment Tala had first cum inside him, replaying the sound of the redhead's moans as they echoed in his ears and made the walls shake.

It was then that the sound of the bathroom door opening caused Kai to jump and look over his shoulder with wide eyes.

Quickly shoving the memories away like a teenage boy would a dirty magazine he tried to steady his breath as Ray's eyes locked with his.

"You... You okay?" Ray asked, taking in Kai's slightly flushed complexion.

It wasn't overly hot in the house or the room, not to mention his head snapped so quick around it was as if he had forgotten Ray was even there.

"Y-Yeah, just, brought up the bags for you," Kai quickly blurted out as he gestured towards the luggage on the floor.

"Thanks.." Ray gave him a quick, maybe too quick, of a smile and shuffled his way to the dresser for some clothes. His hair trailing water along the floor behind him, some left over droplets attached to his bare chest and stomach.

Even after the shower, scrubbing at every last inch of him that he could, he didn't feel any better. Could still feel her hands in his hair, her lips on his, and it made his stomach coil.

Kai threw him a nod after he thanked him before his eyes transfixed on the drops of water that still sat on Ray's tanned skin.

It instantly reminded him of the same glossy sheen Tala had sported as he was hovering over taking him.

God, someone please dump a bucket of ice water over him he was like a horny teenager!

"You gonna come lay with me?" Ray asked in a broken off tone, digging through the dresser without looking back at him.

It was getting too much, he could feel it, like he was a balloon ready burst from being filled with too much air.

"I, was going to go read downstairs actually and let you rest.. Thought you wanted to get a few hours before dinner?" Kai asked as he watched the back of him.

He needed to get out of this room. Seeing Ray in just a towel was making him writhe, especially after his thoughts from earlier.

Ray nodded back as he slipped out of his towel, hiking his boxers up.

"See if I can at least, after the shower I feel kind of awake now though." He explained, running the towel that been originally around his hips through his still damp hair.

Kai's lips parted as he caught a glimpse of Ray's ass. This was torture. He almost felt like he was suffocating now.

So much for keeping his cool. He was an anxious wreck, ike he'd never seen a naked man before. Though, he'd seen one too many now.

"Well, you should rest.. Just give me a shout if you need anything," he said as he turned to leave, making his way towards the door.

"Oh... I thought..." Ray deflated as he watched him start to leave; then again it was only fitting he go lay on their bed by himself.

He didn't deserve him... But, he wanted him.

"You sure you don't wanna stay with me?"

Kai held onto the door, reluctantly stopping in his tracks before tilting his head back into the room.

He could tell by Ray's tone that he wanted him to stay, but he wasn't tired in the slightest so he wasn't sure how long he could just lay there for staring at the furniture that knew of his dirty escapade.

He felt trapped, but he had to just swallow that and put Ray's feelings first.. for once.

"If you want me to stay, I'll stay."

"I'd like that, you know... Been a while." Ray mumbled, playing with the hair that framed his face and blushing as if he were a school boy.

Bringing himself back into the room Kai caught the warmth on Ray's cheeks and awkwardly avoided his gaze as he crawled on to his side of the bed.

He fought with every fibre of his being to suppress the memory of when he was last on this bed, never feeling so uncomfortable in his life and Ray's blushing only made that worse.

Why was he blushing? He wasn't thinking they were gonna.. ? No. They were just gonna cuddle at most.

He couldn't bring himself to do _that_. Not yet. It wouldn't be right.

His mind would more than likely picture someone else after all..

It took another minute, maybe two, before Ray followed after him. Though it wasn't to his side of the bed, or even under the covers.

Sitting himself right on Kai's waist as his face turned scarlet. He was already on him, but his brain stopped working all of a sudden and he didn't know exactly what the next step was or even should be at this point.

What was he even trying to do? Have Kai ram him into oblivion to null and void out the fact he had done that to Mariah?

Thinking about it made his stomach flip and roll in on itself, shaking himself out of it he leant forward quickly and caught Kai's lips with his.

Before Kai could even register what was happening Ray's lips had pressed against his. His eyes widening at the contact as he laid there frozen with him on his waist.

With his own blush now spread across his cheeks he tried desperately to steady his now increasing heartbeat, hoping and praying Ray couldn't still taste the redhead on his lips.

Ray pressed in harder at not getting a response, his heart threatening to rip out of him.

For some reason, this really did bring back uncomfortable flashbacks to his very first time.

It was awkward, could feel the tension with every breath, and with him just sat there with his lips against Kai's, it was like he didn't know what to do beyond that.

After another second of no response he forced himself back up, though stayed where he was sat on Kai's waist, parts of his hair having fallen over his shoulders while the rest seemed to frame him from behind.

"Kai..." He breathed in a pant, still fighting to get a hold of himself.

Kai's eyes locked with Ray's as he dumbly stared up at him.

"Yeah?" He murmured out, the loss of contact allowing his brain to catch up with the present and remember how to function his hands. Immediately he rested them on either side of Ray's bare thighs and caressed his thumbs against them.

His throat went dry as he was able to properly take in the sight before him now.

Ray truly was beautiful. The way his hair effortlessly fell framing his face, and how soft his skin felt under his touch.

"I missed you." It came out as barely a whisper, Ray's skin pricking now that Kai had touched him, leaning back in for hopefully a more proper kiss this time.

Kai knew he didn't deserve him.

He never had.

He was trying to protect Ray from himself but with him getting closer to his face again he was slowly losing his restraint.

When their lips met again his eyes instantly closed and he sunk into it, his hands trailing up from Ray's thighs to rest on either side of his hips. Their kiss feeling familiar yet strange at the same time.

It was soft, almost hesitant. A complete contrast to the vicious and possessive stint he'd endured with Tala.

With him having a taste for such raw animalistic energy though, he wanted more.

He _needed_ more.

Opening his mouth slightly wider he pressed his tongue against Ray's teeth begging for entrance.

Ray let him in, healing and breaking at the same time as tears slipped through his closed eyes.

His body trembled at the familiarity and the terrible reminder of what he had done.

He couldn't do it, wouldn't do this to him.

It wasn't Kai's wrong to right, even if his entire being wanted him something right now his conscious overrode it.

He broke the kiss, though didn't move away from hovering over him.

"I'm sorry..." His lips moved against Kai's as he spoke, the tears coming out harder now. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry Kai."

Kai's eyes flickered as Ray broke the kiss before shooting fully open once he'd realised the precious being on his lap was crying.

Immediately his fair hands cupped Ray's jawline in panic, his thumbs frantically wiping away the falling tears. Did he go too far with him too soon?

"S-Sorry for what? What's wrong Ray? Did I hurt you? I'm sorry," He spewed out, his face contorted now with worry.

Both his heart and mind were racing as his eyes darted to every one of Ray's facial features caressing his cheeks as he did so.

What did he do wrong? Did he kiss him differently? Did he kiss him _wrong?_

Ray bit his lower lip to try and stop it from trembling, why did he have to be so sweet now?

"You... You didn't do anything wrong." He started, pulling away and off of him to where he sat with his back facing Kai on his side of the bed. "But you were right..."

Kai's head followed him as he moved away from him and his eyes narrowed slightly in confusion at his words.

Rolling onto his knees he shuffled towards him and placed a hand on his bare shoulder.

"What do you mean Ray?" he softly asked, "Right about what?"

Ray flinched under his touch, his eyes shutting tight as he gripped the sheets at either side of him. "I... We... You weren't there... She was..."

Slate brows furrowed tighter as he frantically tried to solve the broken riddle. His heart practically beating out of his chest as he racked his brain, repeating Ray's words in his mind.

_'I wasn't there.. she was..'_

She.. the only '_she_' Ray really associated with was..

It took mere seconds for all expression to completely drain from Kai's face and his hand slowly retracted from the tanned shoulder and fell to his lap. Ruby eyes immediately losing all light within them as his voice spoke out almost deadly.

".. say it Ray."

Ray shook his head, a terrible chill running down his spine.

"It didn't mean anything, would _never_ mean anything! I'm sorry... I.. I don't even know what happened, why I would!"

Silence fell over them as Kai's eye's burned into the back of Ray's head. He had no words. He was still processing what he was even hearing right now.

He knew it. He fucking knew it.

The texts. The photos. It was obvious from the beginning he'd wanted to fuck her but _he_ tried to convince him otherwise.

_'She's just a friend.' _

Ha! Hilarious. He felt an absolute fool!

This whole time he'd been sat wallowing feeling guilty when he was out getting his dick wet too.

But.. Did he have a right to be mad right now? Upset?

Hell, he didn't even know how he should feel right now. He just sat there. And for the first time in his life he wished, that just this once, he could have been wrong.

The silence was worse than any outright verbal lashing that he could have gotten. Ray couldn't take looking him in the face when he told him, but now he couldn't take _not_ looking at him.

Whipping around he couldn't read Kai's expression at the moment, nor did the silence make him any better. Then again, there more than likely wasn't going to be a way to make this better.

"Say something..."

Kai could see in his peripheral vision that Ray had turned to face him but he couldn't bring his gaze up to meet his.

He was just staring off, coming to terms with everything, everything that he'd said.

The image of Ray with _her _dancing through his mind now, taunting him.

Mariah had finally got what she wanted; She'd won.

Kai then shrugged his shoulders as he flatly spoke out, "What is there to say?"

Ray's tear stained face fell as he stared stunned, but Kai was right again, what was there to say? Better yet, what would be the point in staying?

He pulled himself up off the bed, and then just stood there staring at him again.

Dulled crimson eyes blinked to regain their focus before finally deciding to look back at Ray through slate coloured bangs.

This feeling in his chest.. It, hurt.

Was this what they called heart break? God, what an awful feeling.

But seeing Ray this hurt too, blissfully unaware that he'd done the exact same damn thing, hurt Kai more.

Unlike Ray though he just didn't have the balls to admit what he'd done out loud.

Two wrongs don't usually make a right but maybe in this instance…

"So what now?" Kai asked, his voice low.

He genuinely didn't know where they went from here. On paper they were even. So did he just forgive him? Brush it under the rug and move on?

For once, he didn't have all the answers.

"I don't know." Ray answered in that same broken tone he had, not sure himself either.

Why wasn't Kai lashing out at him, screaming for him to pack his things and get out? Or at least rub salt into the open wound and shout out how he was right, had been right all along.

"I meant what I said, it didn't mean anything and I wish I could take it back. But, it happened and I can't change it. So this is your call." He tossed the ball back to Kai's side of the court, even if it made him sweat a little.

A slight snicker escaped him. He should've known that Ray would turn it back on him.

Kai 'Know-It-All' Hiwatari, of course.

He was always just expected to know what to do but funnily enough he'd never been in this kind of situation before.

How the fuck was he supposed to know what to do when both parties screw up as bad as they both had?

He was sick of being in control all the damn time!

Dictating everybody's next move, being in charge of everything and everyone around him, people just _expecting_ him to have all the damn answers – Yes sir, no sir, three bags fucking full sir!

Who the fuck died and made him king of the world?

He never asked for any of this!

"Well I don't fucking know Ray!" He yelled out in his frustration, his voice booming throughout the bedroom. "How about for once you let me know what _you _fucking want since you've felt the need to lie to my face for God knows how long?"

There it was. Ray would have smiled if it didn't mean possibly getting his teeth knocked out in the process.

"It wasn't my intention to sleep with her when I left, it just... Happened. I'll admit that whilst things have been so bad between us, I thought some feelings for her had resurfaced.. But it was actually just all the love I have for you Kai getting mixed up.. I regret it, but I don't expect you to just forgive me because I know I wouldn't be able to do the same if it were reversed."

Kai's heart, if it was even possible, sank further down his chest. His pissed off demeanour instantly softening as he replayed what Ray had just uttered.

_'I wouldn't be able to do the same if it were reversed.'_

If it wasn't decided before, those last words had just decided it for him.

Ray admitting just now that he wouldn't be able to forgive him made him swallow down any form of confession that even dared to try sneak from his throat.

He couldn't find out about Tala. He just couldn't.

"So why do you regret it?" He then asked genuinely curious for the answer, like it'd make any difference to the situation.

"She not as good as you remembered?" He added with a slight bite returning to his tone.

Ray gave him a dumb look, of all the things to ask.

"Because I don't love her, I love you! You moron. It just happened, I can't even begin to explain _how_ but it did!" He went off in a higher pitch.

Kai scoffed.

Love. That's rich.

Pretty sure rule #1 of 'being in love' was you don't do shit like this to each other.

Hell, he of all people was no expert on the subject but even_ he_ knew that.

Kai then rubbed a hand down his face and sighed, easing himself off of his knees and turning to his side of the bed to sit on the edge, his back now to Ray as he held his head in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.

Ray shifted where he stood. This whole thing was a mess, he knew that, but the way Kai was acting about it all was starting to really unnerve him. One quip about how well he got laid and that was it?

Surely it couldn't be...

"You asked me what I wanted, and I want to stay with you because I do love you Kai, even if my actions speak differently. But I'll completely understand if you want me gone, so say something please!"

Kai was dying on the inside.

The last thing he wanted was for him to go. He'd already left him once and look what he'd done within the first few hours of him being out the door.

He was nothing but a monster and Ray was practically begging for _his_ forgiveness.

Every time he said he loved him it just stung his chest. He didn't deserve his love. Sure what Ray did was wrong but he'd practically pushed him into Mariah's arms.

Could he really blame him for that?

She was this big bundle of joy and he was just.. him.

Like Ray said he wasn't there.. She was.

She was there for him. Always had been there for him. When it should have been him. But he wasn't. He was too busy working or getting on his knees for someone else.

Kai stood up from the bed. He couldn't be in this room anymore, he needed some air.

Walking past Ray and heading for the bedroom door he tiredly sighed out, "Just do what you want Ray."

Ray stood as stiff as a board as the bedroom door closed behind Kai, the room seeming to stretch out from under him bigger than what it was as it began to tilt sideways and he roughly sat back down before he collapsed on the floor.

What just happened? How were they going to get past this?

Despite telling Kai, the guilt was still there clinging to him and perhaps it always would.


	14. Red or Black

A/N: Anyone sick of my user yet? All these updates and it isn't even Christmas anymore..

Back on the regular time line with this one though. Hope everyone enjoyed the daft little side chapter me, Lux and Roy did featuring Bryan and the Ivanov's Christmas Dinner xD If you've not read it be sure to check it out, it's hilarious.

Gonna be the last update from me for a few weeks as I fly out in two days to be reunited with a good friend of mine after 5 years.

For those following my 'Long Distance' fic that will be my main priority upon my return as the inspo I'm sure will be flowing outta me!

Finally - Happy New Year everyone! I hope 2020 is a good one for all of you.

See you soon.

K~

* * *

Chapter 14 – Red or Black

"Place your bets gentleman."

Kai had no idea how long he'd been sat in this casino for now.

He knew he was down around ten grand but with his company earning that every fifteen minutes or so it was barely worth furrowing his brows over.

It had been two weeks since Ray had confessed to sleeping with Mariah and the entire time since then had been a silent blur for both of them.

Ray was back to working at the restaurant and Kai was pretty much living at his office now. And that was his actual office at headquarters, not the one at home.

Even if he was able to work from the house on a particular day, Kai would always choose to drive in to the city just to avoid being around Ray.

He'd finish work at his usual time of around six, but then would often stick around to do a few hours over time, or he'd go to the gym some nights, the bar others, or like this particular evening the casino.

He couldn't be in a room with Ray for longer than 15 minutes without envisioning him balls deep in the pink thing.

Her trampy claws running through his luscious locks and him clearly not giving a second thought about him.

How could he have done? If he'd have crossed Ray's mind for even a second surely he wouldn't have done what he did?

And he had the nerve to say he'd missed him… Hilarious.

Swirling the last mouthful of whiskey around his glass, Kai lifted it to his lips throwing the remaining amber liquid down his throat before placing the tumbler back down on the roulette table's edge.

Within seconds a young cocktail waitress dressed in a fitted white shirt with a tie and black trousers promptly came over to collect the empty glass.

"One more sir?" She timidly asked him, her teddy bear brown eyes awaiting his usual silent response as she picked up his glass and placed it on her circular tray.

Kai gave a single curt nod and kept his eyes focused on the roulette table in front of him.

He'd already had a fair few 'one mores' deeming the last one his last one and the one before that his last one also, but he had no intentions of going home just yet and specifically left his watch at the house this morning to allow time to completely evade him.

Almost mindlessly throwing a thousand down on black and a handful of chips on various numbers across the board, he saved the waitress a glance once more, completely ignoring her as she placed his fresh drink down beside him and quickly made herself scarce.

"No more bets," the dealer firmly announced as he raised his right hand.

The small white ball flew round the roulette wheel, skipping along the numbers, teasing being settled in a pocket for a moment before being flung around once more and finally stopping in a red coloured compartment seconds later.

"14 Red…14 Red," He stated in a clear tone as he placed a heavy glass marker on the number 14 on the board, promptly collected up all of the losing piles of chips and handed over any winnings to the other several men stood around the large rectangular table.

"Not so hot tonight are ya Hiwatari?" An older man taunted, taking a puff of his cigar as chubby hands raked up his winnings and threw a smug smirk in Kai's direction.

Kai's expression remained deadpan as he took a sip of his whiskey, acting as if the large man hadn't uttered a single word to him.

Another man, more of a lanky build then chirped in before taking a sip of his own alcoholic beverage.

"He's gotta be down at least what... a good several thousand now?"

"Business must be booming if he can afford to just _throw _it away." Another hard faced man chimed.

Like a jealous pack of high school girls the group of grown men continued to bitch and sneer amongst themselves, their words not even making it to Kai's ears now as crimson eyes followed the white ball that had been thrown around the wheel once more.

"Place your bets gentleman."

Red or Black.

Why did it all have to come down to red or black?

Several years ago, back when he was a teen, he'd had to make the same choice.

Red or Black.

Dranzer.

Beautiful flickering ruby red flames that had illuminated his life for as long as he could remember.

Familiar, warm, comfortable.

The spirit that he could always count on to be there for him. Completely at ease with that ball of glorious energy - No question of loyalty - he could trust her with his life.

But then Black Dranzer came along.

A smouldering dark inferno that was new to him, unsettling, yet dangerously exciting.

Enticing black embers that upon having a mere taste of such power, sparked a whole new meaning to the word desire within the depths of his soul that he just couldn't ignore – couldn't resist.

Kai's eyes narrowed as he glanced from his diminishing pile of chips to the numbers printed on the table.

Why did he have to choose?

Why couldn't he just... have both?

If you place a chip on both red and black in a game of roulette you couldn't exactly lose. It was either going to be red or black..

But this was real life.

With real people… who had real feelings..

Why did it matter if he kept that dark energy on the side though? Call upon it when he saw fit?

It was _just_ sex! He didn't even _like_ Tala!

Truth be told he found the whole idea of him morally repulsive. His personality irritated him more than Tyson ever did. The only feelings the redhead sparked within him were crippling guilt and regret, so _why_ couldn't he stop thinking about him?

He'd not seen Tala since the night at his office. The night before Ray called wanting to come crawling back home with his tail between his legs.

The same night Kai had gotten a mere sample again and was left starving for the main course.

Tala had texted him a few times since that night; sent the odd thirst trap photo, and it wasn't long before he'd been resaved in his phone as just 'T.'

Admittedly Kai entertained the flirtations that came from the wolf just that little bit more now.

Welcomed them in fact.

Finding out about Mariah caused something in him to snap and view what he'd done in a whole different light. He still felt guilty of course but couldn't shake off the feeling that what Ray had done to him was just so much worse.

Ray and Mariah had history first of all. So how could Kai even be sure if Ray's feelings had ever died down for her?

Had they ever stopped fucking since they broke up?

Secondly, Ray was stone cold sober when he did what he did. Completely aware of his actions so it was hardly a '_mistake_' like he'd claimed.

Whilst it was a pathetic excuse, if an excuse at all, Kai could barely have been considered in charge of himself the night Tala took him.

He couldn't even recall everything! And what he could remember he'd originally wanted to forget, he honestly did.

But a part of him now was clutching to those broken memories of that night of passion and the morning after like his life was depending on it; like they were his tickets to the twisted revenge show.

Everything engrained in his mind.

The smell of Tala's cologne deeply set in to his nostrils. The feel of his spiked scarlet hair between his fingers. The warmth of his fair skin…

[x]

"We should do this again sometime, been fun." Tala called out fresh from his shower as he sauntered back down the stairs, pulling on the same now dry black hoodie he'd originally come over in.

Seeing the redhead reappear at the bottom of the stairs Kai threw him a dirty look before his eyes went back to his laptop. For a second then he'd almost forgotten he was still here.

"Will you just fuck _off_ already?" He responded in a jaded tone.

With a smirk Tala joined him again in the living room and stood behind where he was sitting on the couch. He just loved pissing this kid off.

Leaning over he wrapped his arms around Kai's neck and rested his face beside his, cheek to cheek, having a nosey at what he was doing on the laptop in front of him.

"Really? Work? On a Sunday?" He scoffed, cocking a red brow. "Don't you ever just chill?"

Kai ignored him.

Ignored the alluring natural scent of him and the tingle he felt along his skin the second Tala's arms wrapped around him and continued to tap away on the keyboard.

Sure he '_chilled_' - Sometimes.

But he figured he'd keep his focus on something else other than what his boyfriend was possibly doing that was stopping him from calling and the disgust he currently had for himself for being so easily led astray.

Though, it was becoming increasingly hard to concentrate with a wolf literally breathing down his neck.

Unfolding an arm, Tala reached over and pressed the laptop lid down shut with a single finger causing Kai's hands to retract towards himself and make a quick escape.

Dropping his hands down on the laptop with a huff Kai's face said it all as he silently plotted a murder.

Planting a quick kiss on his cheek just to add more fuel to the brewing fire, Tala unwrapped his arms completely and eased himself up from the back of the sofa.

"I'm leaving, be a good host and see your guest out." He coolly said, continuing to prod the bear as he made his way to the front door, "Or have we lost our manners again?"

Kai rolled his eyes as he moved his laptop from his lap to the space on the couch beside him and stood up.

If he just played along with his stupid games he'd leave faster, and then that would be it, he'd never have to see him again.

Plan.

Walking past him to the front door Kai unlocked it and swung it open before exaggeratingly holding out his arm gesturing for him to leave.

"Goodbye Tala." He firmly said.

The redhead gave a single nod of his head as he spoke back with a sickly sweet smile, "Been a pleasure. Like I said we should do this again some time."

"Mhm."

Kai's expression remained plain as he humoured him with the low hum of a sarcastic agreement.

'_Just play along… Just play along.'_

Tala then turned to walk out the front door but with a swift change of direction cupped Kai's face and pulled him in close, his lips millimetres from his own before Kai registered what was happening and abruptly pulled his head away, shrugging him off.

Tala tutted at the rejection.

"What, no kiss goodbye? Come on Kai don't be like that, you know you want just one more taste before I go.. You'll regret it if you don't."

His voice purred out, low and seductive as he stepped closer to Kai again, stroking a finger down his chest.

It was then Kai made the poor decision of taking a dangerous glance down at his lips just as he slithered his tongue over them leaving a shine.

He knew he should just tell him to get out again but that sheen looked real inviting. Maybe if he just-

-No. He needs to be strong dammit! Enough was enough!

'_You'll regret it if you don't.'_

The only '_regret'_ he had was letting Ray convince him they needed the yard doing in the first place. The derelict mess it was before was just, _FINE_!

"Just go Tala." Kai managed to get out, swatting the fair hand off of his chest.

Tala sent him a smirk before disregarding him completely, cupped his face again and pressed his lips softly against his.

He knew this was what Kai wanted. He was just too damn stubborn to admit it. But like he'd told him before, he could read his body, and all of the signs were there.

He saw him take a curious glimpse of his lips, and he saw how those pupils dilated.

Kai wanted him just as much as he wanted Kai so why try and take the moral high ground? They'd already fucked, why didn't he just give in to his clear desires?

It's not like Ray had just miraculously reappeared on the doorstep so stop fighting it already!

As his lips touched his, Kai couldn't help but melt into it.

His limbs suddenly gaining a mind of their own as his hand made its way up to Tala's face and pulled him in closer.

He opened his mouth immediately after to allow their tongues to dance together once more, the taste of him being a flavour he was beyond familiar with now.

The damage was already done so he may as well just enjoy it while it lasted… Get his monies worth so they say.

As they stood in the doorway Kai noticed that their kiss didn't seem as fiery and demanding as it had been previously... but slower, more, passionate?

Whilst their hands were roaming trying to feel the other over their clothes it wasn't in the same hungry nature he'd grown somewhat accustomed to with Tala.

He wasn't complaining however, he was a good kisser either way, he – _**OW**_**!** Did he just _bite_ him?!

Taking a step back Tala wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and smirked as he watched Kai's look of anguish and instantly check if his lip was bleeding with both his tongue and his fingers.

"Prick!"

"_That's_ so you don't forget me." Tala added, his smirk unwavering as he turned to step out the house, calling over his shoulder as he made his way down the paved drive to his car.

"Til next time gorgeous!"

With a disgusted sneer Kai slammed the door, pressing his fingers to his lip again and checking them for blood.

[x]

* * *

Kai's curiosity had been more than satisfied in those 24 hours! The stint in his office was just a bonus!

He'd liked the look of him whilst he was over working at the house, ended up fucking him - there! Done! He should just be over it.. But it was admittedly the best sex of his life and he couldn't imagine not having just another slice of the pie..

He placed the remaining stack of chips he had in his possession all on red.

Better the devil you know right? His number one.

Only in his case, choosing red meant continuing to play _Russian_ Roulette and everyone knows how that dangerous game often ends…

After several seconds the white ball settled.

"1 Red.. 1 Red.." the mousey blonde dealer called out, placing the glass marker on the number one and instantly pushed over an immense pile of coloured chips into Kai's corner of the table.

"Congratulations sir," He then added with a genuine smile. "Shall I get this all cashed up for you?"

Kai never usually stayed after a big win. He knew when to call it quits, and having frequented the place every other night for the past two weeks the staff had become more than accustomed to the CEO's routine.

Kai simply nodded to him before downing the remainder of his whiskey. The liquid no longer burning as the few glasses he'd had prior had already numbed his throat.

Placing the empty glass down he picked up several of the coloured chips from the pile before him and placed them on the table's edge beside the dealer.

"Thank you sir," the male said with a polite bow of his head in gratitude and casually moved the five grand tip to one side that he would cash in after he finished his shift.

He did love it when Mr Hiwatari came to play.

Kai then picked up a single coin from the pile, walked over to the large man with the cigar and dropped it into his shirt pocket before patting on it twice.

"Get yourself something nice."

His voice dripped with sarcasm as he walked away from the roulette table leaving the group of men dumbly staring at the pile of winnings over where Kai was stood just a moment ago.

At an estimate it totalled around 85 thousand?

'_Pfft, who aint hot?'_

Kai meandered around the casino with his hands leisurely sitting in his trouser pockets, his white shirt unbuttoned at the top and tie-less as he'd left that along with his suit jacket in the car.

The bright lights of the twenty or so slot machines lined up reflected in his tired and slightly blood shot eyes.

Taking a glance over at the poker table he thought against starting a game, deeming himself too mentally drained to focus on card strategies right now.

Whilst he really didn't want to, he knew he should probably head home. It had been a long day having worked for 13 hours and then coming straight here.

Having got the all clear from the manager that his roulette winnings had been sent via direct deposit straight into his account Kai sluggishly made his way out of the casino, dragging his feet along like a child not wanting to leave the playground as the glass door was opened for him by a tall suited host.

"Goodnight Mr Hiwatari," The man at the entrance said before sending him a warm smile, "Maybe just go straight home tomorrow though yeah? Don't think the place can afford to keep paying you out like this." He gestured at the building behind him with his head, a small chuckle escaping him.

Kai gave a small laugh through his nose before unlocking his Mercedes.

"Can't make any promises," he replied with a small smirk of his own as he opened his car door and slipped inside.

Grabbing his water bottle from the cup holder Kai took several large gulps in an attempt to clear some of the alcohol from his system for the 15 minute drive home.

Taking a glance at the clock on the car's dash it had just turned midnight.

Ray should be asleep by now so he wouldn't have to face him for another day at least when he got in. Hopefully anyway.

How long were they supposed to go on like this?

It had turned so sour between them and he hated it but couldn't control how he felt about Ray now.

He knew that with things as they were they should just break up. Call it a day.

This, if you could even call it a relationship, wasn't healthy in the slightest, for either of them.

Kai couldn't bear to even look at him nowadays but he didn't want to end it as he couldn't imagine himself being with anyone else..

Why couldn't he just let what Ray did with Mariah go? Technically he'd already got his own back, so _why_ did he still feel like he needed some form of revenge?

If he fucked Tala again would it make him feel better? Could he move on then? The alcohol in his system convinced his mind that it was worth a shot at least. Fuck it.

Maybe he could send Tiffany home early one day and he could take him properly in his office.. Have him straddled over his desk like he'd had Ray a fair few times before when they'd first started dating, back when everything was new and exciting.

Or maybe he could go and see_ his_ place.

It wasn't right for him to keep shitting on his own doorstep. He could see if Tala put his money he got for the work he did in the yard to good use and see if he had some decent décor at least.

Though let's be honest Kai didn't give a fuck about what colour walls Tala's bedroom had.

Hmm.. maybe he could get him to stare at his wedding photos whilst he fucked him the same way he made him look at Ray's image and see if he could strike the same nerve.

'_I promise to be your ever faithful, honest and loving husband..'_

What a crock of shit.

Imagining those words coming out of the red head's mouth was almost comical.

It was a surprise Tala hadn't immediately burst in to flames as soon as he stepped foot inside the damn church.

He wouldn't trust that guy as far as he could throw him, but some poor sap of a woman had complete faith in him and believed every bullshit lie that came out of that pretty little mouth, his performance on the phone to her proved that.

Pulling up into the driveway Kai frowned at the soft glow of light that was radiating from the glass in the front door.

Was Ray still awake?

Unclipping his seat belt Kai took a glimpse at the clock again - it was almost twelve thirty now. Maybe he'd just left the light on when he went to bed? Please say he's just left the light on…

Easing himself out the car he reached for his suit jacket he'd slung on the passenger seat and held it draped over his right shoulder before softly slamming the car door to a close.

Ray's ears pricked at the sound and too took note of the time.

With a light sigh escaping him he placed his book down on the glass table in front of him and took a hold of his tea, taking a sip and holding it close as a means to comfort himself.

This was it. This was the night he was going to confront him.

They couldn't go on like this anymore, it was getting ridiculous!

Every single night for the past two weeks Kai had stayed out way past his working hours and most of the time reeked of booze. Couldn't he see what he was doing to himself?

Placing his key in the door Kai slowly turned it and pulled down the handle. The light from the living room radiating all that brighter along with the golden eyes that had immediately locked with his.

"Morning." Ray quipped as Kai just stared at him.

Setting his cup back down he motioned at the couch for him to come sit with him, moving himself over so as not to have Kai think he'd jump him.

Kai tutted, closing the front door behind him before begrudgingly making his way into the living room. Clear disappointment sitting on his face knowing he was going to have to make some sort of conversation with him tonight. Couldn't exactly avoid him now..

"It isn't _that_ late." He retorted under his breath, draping his jacket over the back of the couch and remained standing beside it with folded arms.

"Why aren't you asleep?" He added with a frown almost like he was scolding a child.

Trying his best to hold a neutral face Ray stared at him, much like how Kai had at first before his own sigh passed his lips.

"Why are you doing this to yourself?" He questioned in a soft tone, "And it's late enough, has been every time you come home now."

Kai rolled his eyes. Who was he, his mother?

"Doing what Ray? Working?" His tone was a complete contrast to Ray's own. "I don't need this as soon as I get in the house so if you're gonna try start with me I'll just go back out." He bit, gesturing over his shoulder towards the door.

"You work in a brewery now?" Ray asked with a hint of sarcasm in his tone, his brow reaching up as he looked Kai over. "I'm not starting anything with you, I'm trying to stop you from hurting yourself here."

Kai scoffed, his expression scrunching up into a sneer.

"So I had a few after work, so what? You're so _fucking_ dramatic."

Turning on his heel he walked away from him, out of the living room and started to make his way up the stairs. He wasn't dealing with this. He worked hard, and if a few drinks helped him sleep at night so be it.

Throwing his head and body back into the couch, Ray let out a long sigh before a small curse passed his lips. Covering his eyes with the palm of his hand, his concern and worry for him getting drowned out by the anger he felt suddenly bubbling up inside his gut.

He had no right, not anymore, but the last thing he wanted was to see Kai and his car wrapped around a tree and if he kept doing this...

A shiver ran down his spine at the image alone. Enough was enough.

"Quit punishing yourself for my mistakes!" He yelled out to him, his hand falling from his face as he slapped the cushion of the couch and stood.

Opening their bedroom door Ray's words, as faint as they were from downstairs, hit Kai like a ton of bricks and caused him to pause in his tracks.

Was that what he was subconsciously doing? Falling back into his old habits because he felt he needed to punish himself? Not for what Ray had done of course but for what he had decided to put them both through?

Pfft. No.

He just wanted to numb himself somewhat after a hard day's work. That was all.

There Ray went again with his melodramatics.

He wouldn't ever fall down that hole again. Sure things were bad but they weren't _that_ bad..

Unbuttoning his white shirt Kai took out his phone from his pocket that had just vibrated and stared down at it.

[U awake?]

Ray gave it a minute, who knew how far Kai was gone at the moment and the last time he was far too many in it hadn't ended well for either of them. He didn't need a repeat.

Slowly, almost carefully he trailed after him up the stairs, coming to standing in their bedroom doorway as he leaned into it with his shoulder, pulling his arms around himself as he stared at the back of Kai's head.

"Do you even care that you can get hurt doing this? Every night you've come home _driving_ while intoxicated, is it your life's goal to make me sick with worry all the time about you?"

Kai near enough jumped out of his skin, his hands fumbling to catch his phone that had almost slipped through tipsy fingers and quickly swiped off the x rated image that had just been sitting on his screen.

What was a faint voice from downstairs a second ago had become significantly louder and clearer as he shot back to look at Ray now stood behind him. He didn't even hear him come up!

Shoving his phone back into his trouser pocket he cleared his throat before speaking out, his voice laced with bitter poison.

"I think we've established Ray that where_ I'm_ concerned it's out of sight out of mind with you. So don't pretend that you sit here even remotely worried for my wellbeing whilst I'm gone."

Though he looked to have regained his composure Kai's heart was pounding in his chest still at just how close Ray was to potentially seeing what he'd just being gawking at on his phone.

The dog had had all day to message him, why choose _now_ when he'd just walked through the bloody door?!

Ray gave him a dumb look, scoffing at him as he gestured behind him.

"Oh, so me actually sitting down there is me pretending?" He asked with another slice of sarcasm in his tone. "Oh, and oh my god let's not talk about who had to turn around last night and made sure you didn't choke on your vomit."

Kai's lips parted but promptly closed as he turned his back to him again and continued to unbutton his shirt.

Pretty sure Ray had said he wasn't going to start with him yet here he was! Clearly starting with him!

Shaking the shirt off his broad shoulders he silently continued his nightly routine, balling it up and chucking it in the laundry basket and stepping past Ray into the en-suite bathroom, throwing his trademark scowl his way.

Should've just stayed at the casino..

"How long?" Ray called loud enough Kai could hear him with an eye roll that went ignored.

"As long as I want." Kai muttered out like a sulking teenager as he ran the tap to start washing away the day.

Splashing the cool water over his face a few times he blindly grabbed for the towel off the hook to the side and with scrunched up eyes rubbed it roughly over his face.

Dropping the towel haphazardly back on to the side of the bath he leaned onto the sink and stared up into the mirror before him.

A drop of water fell from his slate bangs as he took note of the darkened circles under his eyes that were growing more and more apparent as the days went on.

They say alcohol makes people look three times more attractive but even with the minimum amount in his system Kai was looking anything but hot right now.

Deep down he knew Ray was right in all he'd said but… Whatever.

Taking his phone back out of his pocket he clicked back onto the text thread and couldn't help smirking a little again at the photo that had been sent over.

[K: Can't talk.]

[T: Y? Cat's still up?]

Sending a simple 'thumbs up' emoji Kai reached over for his toothbrush and placed the phone on the side of the sink as he put on the toothpaste. A moment later his screen illuminated again.

[T: U can't quickly return the favour?]

Kai smirked as he almost considered it, the upturn of his lips causing a thin stream of toothpaste to escape the corner of his mouth. He was alone in the bathroom after all..

[K: Tomorrow.. If you're good.] He decided on.

A winking smiley appeared on his screen in response

Spitting out the toothpaste and rinsing his mouth out with water he wiped his lips with the back of his hand before opening the bathroom door and walking back into the bedroom.

By the time he had come in and out of the bathroom, Ray was placing a waste basket down at his side of the bed, had ran down in time to get him a glass of water and had it up on the bedside table.

"I don't know how many more times you want me to apologize, or keep thinking that I don't love you. But I'm not gonna stand here and do nothing about you doing this to yourself." Ray said without looking back at him, setting everything he had grabbed down before he backed away from it.

"So stop it before you kill yourself." He begged.

Kai spared him the eye roll that was threatening to appear as this evening he was actually sober enough to notice all the small gestures Ray had laid out for him. It almost seemed like this was a regimented routine for the younger male now.

Waste basket, water, pull down the sheets so he could just collapse on top of the bed.

He appreciated it of course he did... Wasn't gonna say it though.

"Alright," Kai sighed out, the hint of frustration clear in his voice.

Ray didn't look convinced at that simple 'alright', there wasn't anything 'alright' about this or what Kai was doing to himself.

"No, no you don't get to just 'alright' me! That's not how this works and you know it! How many times, Kai, have I had to hold your goddam hand to pick your ass off the floor? How many times have I gone, laying here holding your head up so you don't choke and die on me because you want to throw out all sensibility and drown out your problems!? If you want to punish someone so badly, I'm standing right here waiting!" He yelled as he threw his arms out to either side of him.

What he was expecting, he wasn't really sure, but whatever it was he felt he deserved it down to his soul.

Kai's expression remained unreadable as he looked Ray over. His crimson eyes not even blinking as his hands made their way to his trousers where he unbuckled his belt and slowly pulled it out from the loops.

Ray stared in a bit of shock, a wave of heat washing through him while his brain tried to think of a scenario that went with that simple movement.

Two of them were good, the other was anything but. And he wasn't sure if he really wanted to wait around to find out which one Kai chose.

Yet, he said he was right there, ready to take whatever it was as his hands fell down to his sides while his heart threatened to break out of him.

Casually chucking the leather belt on the drawers beside them Kai turned and searched for some sweat pants inside one of them.

"Fuck you think I'm gonna do, hit you?" He questioned, pulling out the pants and unbuttoning his trousers with one hand as he stared back at him bored.

"No, not really... Then again I wouldn't blame you." Ray answered in a slight mutter, pulling at his hair from his face.

Kai couldn't suppress the eye roll any longer. He had no patience for people's pity parties on the best of days never mind under these messed up circumstances.

"Go get ready for bed Ray." He sighed out.

"Just..." Ray stopped, already worn out from repeating himself as he went to move for the bathroom.

"Just please stop." He said in a breath, leaving Kai there like he had to him and shut the bathroom door behind him.

Kai stared at the closed bathroom door for a moment, Ray's last words cutting him somewhat.

He knew that he was referring to the late nights and the drinking but the way he just pleaded to him right now made him think of something else he should really stop.

Whilst his current actions were suggesting otherwise, he did want to fix this.

Switching into his sweats Kai edged the waste basket away from his side of the bed with his foot.

Wouldn't need that tonight at least.

Taking a few sips of water Ray had gotten for him he placed the glass back onto the bedside table before easing himself on to the mattress with a sigh as he stared up at the ceiling. That awful feeling of guilt circling round his stomach again.

Glancing to the table again he frowned, before easing himself up and heading back towards the drawers and feeling his empty trouser pockets.

Wide blood shot eyes immediately darted towards the closed bathroom door.

Shit.

Halfway with brushing his own teeth, his hair out and down his back, Kai's phone lit up as it sat on the side of the counter.

The only thing Ray saw was the letter T and that it was a new text message. The only 'T' he knew of was Tiffany, but why on earth would she be messaging so late into the night?

Another went off a few seconds later as he finished brushing, apparently whatever she needed to tell Kai was important.

Half tempted to open it and look, though knew not to cross that line at the moment he quickly finished with brushing his teeth before taking up the phone in his hand and coming back out into the bedroom.

Before handing the phone to Kai, he moved the waste basket closer to the bed and stood up with the phone out to him.

"Left it in there." Was all he said, passing it off to Kai before going to the dresser for a change of clothes himself.

Kai stared dumbly at him as his heart skipped a beat, quickly making the conscious attempt to not straight snatch the phone from his grasp and just held out his hand for it as casually as he could.

"Thanks.."

"Tiffany is texting you late tonight, she okay?" Ray asked, pulling out his clothes.

Walking back over to the bed Kai moved the waste basket away once more before getting back onto the mattress and frowning.

"I don't know? Why, what'd she say?" He asked looking down at his phone. Why would Tiffany be texting him at this time?

"Oh I didn't open up the message, it just buzzed whilst I was in there and I just glanced at the screen," Ray casually explained as he pulled his nightshirt over his head. "Presuming 'T' is Tiffany right?"

Clicking on the screen Kai gave an almost too quick of a nod, "Y-Yeah, course it is."

Not even bothering to read the two texts fully that had come through Kai held down the power button and placed the phone face down onto to bedside table before grabbing his glass of water to rectify his now dried up throat.

Ray made his way over to the bed and eased himself onto it watching him the entire time, after a minute or two of silence he tilted his head before cautiously speaking out.

"You uh, not gonna reply to her?"

"I'm sure it can wait until morning Ray."

Though he was starting to sweat Kai got himself under the bed covers and nestled down with his back facing towards him.

"Seemed to be something important though since she messaged _twice_ at this time of night.." Ray pressed, he too getting underneath the sheets but kept his distance from Kai like he'd done since their first night he'd dared to sleep in the same bed as him, his focus on his bare back.

"Well it probably isn't so quit worrying about it and go to sleep!" Kai bit over his shoulder, his tone remaining as cold as his blood now as he could feel Ray's eyes all over him.

Ray shifted a little, taking the tone like a knife to the heart.

He wasn't sure if he could really blame the drink right now for how Kai was speaking to him and reminded himself this was just what he got for what he had done. Why he had even came up to the main bed instead of taking himself to one of the guest rooms was beyond him now. He should've just kept his distance.

"Okay..." Was all he said, his voice getting weaker as Ray picked up his book from his bedside table and found himself inching closer to the edge of the bed.

Kai remained silent, he too shifting underneath the sheets and though he looked comfortable he was anything but as he instantly regretted his sharp tone the second it passed his lips.

"Night..." Ray then breathed at him, not looking away from his book.

Despite being tired he wasn't really ready to lay down beside him like this again, every night so far had been torture and he found himself as close to the edge of the bed as he could get away from him, making them seem miles apart and cold from lack of body heat.

How much longer they'd be able to keep this up, he wasn't sure, but he could feel himself starting to crack.

"Night, I guess," Kai muttered back to him though unlike Ray he wasn't tired at all now. Every ounce of alcohol seemed to have drained from his system as a million thoughts ran through his mind as he laid there staring over at nothing.

After several minutes with the bedside light still glowing and the sound of a paper page turning, Kai rolled onto his back and took a glance over at Ray who seemed a ridiculous distance from him in their king size bed.

"You don't exactly look like you're going to sleep..." He uttered out.

"No... I was just... Saying that to you... Thought you were going to sleep." Ray answered as his head snapped to him, not really wondering why it was so hard to talk to him like this was their first night sleeping in the same bed all over again.

"Not really tired.." Kai stated, tucking the arm closest to Ray up behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling now.

"Oh... So… What's happening tomorrow?" Ray dared to ask, referring to the message preview that he'd briefly seen on Kai's phone screen when he picked it up.

"Hn?" Kai's head turned to face him again.

Tomorrow? He had a meeting at 10:30 but that was about it..

Ray's head gestured towards the face down phone on Kai's bedside table.

"I briefly saw Tiff mention tomorrow.. looking forward to it or something?" Ray mumbled, his attention falsely going back to his book as he tried to slyly dig for the info. He still found it a little weird that Kai didn't reply and had just turned his phone off like that.

A wave of anxiety washed through him once he realised what Ray was referring to now.

"Oh.. Uhm," Kai stuttered as he racked his brain for something to say back to him, simultaneously cursing himself - Of all the times for him to be careless with his phone!

Suddenly it then dawned on him that the _real_ Tiffany had actually spoken to him earlier this afternoon trying to organise this damn double date with Bianca and Tala for tomorrow night.

"She uh, was asking if you were free Friday night, but it doesn't matter, so don't worry about it." He reeled off trying to dismiss this entire conversation.

Ray arched a brow, setting his book down on his lap. "Why is she asking about what I'm doing?" He pressed.

Kai shifted. Clearly he'd said too much already and the curious cat Ray was he wasn't going to drop it now.

Well.. Might as well give some truth to this tale..

"The other night when I was working late she came back to the office and she had a friend with her. Said friend is the wife of… That guy who did our garden." He awkwardly said after a brief pause, feeling slightly sick now, though he knew it wasn't from the alcohol.

"We got talking and a double date was suggested.. But I think she was just trying to be nice so I'm just going to politely decline."

Ray blinked at him a few times. When was the last time they got out of the house together, or even had the word 'date' come up?

"What're you doing tomorrow night? I'm free."

Kai turned his head to face him again, his expression contorted slightly.

"You're not serious?"

"Why not, have nothing better to do." Ray shrugged at him, "Plus, when was the last time we went out together or with anyone? And he seemed like a decent enough guy, why not try and make a friend out of it?"

Kai scoffed as he turned his head away from him.

"I don't need any more _friends_ Ray."

He couldn't believe he was actually suggesting this.

The thought of having both Ray and Tala in the same room just screamed awkward. Honestly he'd rather stick pins in his eyes.

A smile that had no business being there crept up Ray's face.

"Yes you do." He said as he playfully nudged him with his foot under the covers. "Tony didn't seem like that bad of a guy, kind of reminded me of you a bit."

Kai's head snapped back to face him once more as he lifted himself up on to his side.

"He's _nothing_ like me!" He barked out at him.

How could Ray even think that? How many years had he known him now? Eight? Ten? And he really has him down as a cocky, arrogant little prick?!

"He's- Wait... _Tony_?"

"Is that not his name?" Ray asked as he couldn't get his smile off his face, Kai's slight outburst only fuelling it.

Kai paused.

If he corrected him how would that come across? Would it make him look guilty? Too interested?

In Ray's eyes he'd not seen Tala since the day he'd finished the yard. Would a normal person remember someone's name after that time frame? Ugh. Best not risk it.

"I don't fuckin' know.. pretty sure it wasn't _Tony_ though.." He said, hopefully convincing enough and shuffled back down onto his back again.

"Tiff didn't give you the name of the guy she's trying to put us on a double with?" Ray asked a bit slowly as his brow rose again.

Kai tensed again. Curious little kitty tonight wasn't he?!

"Sure, but I didn't care to remember it since we're _not_ going." He sassed back. "Surprised you don't remember his name since he's _so nice _of a guy."

"Why aren't we going? You asked me, and I want to go." Ray pouted slightly at him. He had no real place to be making demands at the moment, but they needed to start getting a hold of their relationship at some point if Kai just wasn't going to call it off.

Kai rolled his eyes.

Why the hell did he even bring this up?

Could've just said Tiffany was wanting his morning coffee order or something. There. Why did that idea not come to him ten minutes ago?

"_Why_? He's just some guy who did the yard Ray. Why do you want to go?"

With a long sigh, Ray plucked his book off his lap and set it on the table beside him. Shifting under the covers and rolling on his side to face Kai he held in a breath, letting out slowly as he went over how this needed to come out.

"Because I'm getting tired of this, the distance that we have right now. I know why it's there, and I understand it, but if we're not breaking up then we need to figure out how to step forward from this." He said with a small gesture between the two of them, pulling his hand back down and under his head and pillow.

"We can't live like this for the rest of our lives, going out even if it's with the gardener and his wife I'll take it if it means we're taking steps forward."

Kai pressed his lips together as he thought of an adequate excuse in response though no words would come.

Ray was right, and he could see that he really was trying to make amends.

The small gestures like bringing him water to bed. Making his lunch and ironing his shirts for work. Kai had noticed it all. Desperately trying to fix the two of them whilst he was apparently just wanting to destroy them further..

Hell, the kid _must_ be desperate if he was willing to go out to dinner with two strangers in an attempt to make baby steps with their relationship.. Just why did it have to be _those_ two strangers?

If he continued to put up a fight with this it'd look like he didn't want to sort this between them, but that wasn't the case at all. Of course he wanted to fix this but sitting across a table from the guy you're fucking on the side was _not_ the way to go about it.

Seemed like he had no other choice though but to grin and bear it. Hopefully Tala would have the same thoughts and he could somehow stop this absolute shit storm from going ahead.

".. Fine.." He sighed out in his defeat.

Ray stared at him, that 'fine' didn't seem fine at all but what more was he really looking for here? Hell if he even knew at the point in time, everything was fucked thirty degrees west and yet this was a chance to make it right.

"Okay..." Was all he could really give back to him after that, debating if he should roll over or not now that it was done or stay and look at him.

Feeling Ray's eyes still on him Kai tilted his head to face him.

Once upon a time he used to love the thought of people tip-toeing round him but not now. The unsurety and hesitation he could sense from him was awful. He hated knowing Ray felt like that now, that he couldn't get too close for fear of having his hand bitten off.

"C'mere," He sighed out with a quick tilt of his head.

For whatever reason that word alone made Ray's heart skip a beat and shatter at the same time, though did what Kai had said although hesitantly.

Scooting himself from the edge of the bed and to the middle where he stopped, was he allowed to get closer? Was this as far as he could go or did Kai want him all the way beside him? If he wasn't so unsure he would have just flung himself at him, not gave a care, but as familiar as this was it was also new and terrifying. And even worse, he still wondered why he had done this to them to start with.

It wasn't worth this, nothing would be worth this, so _why_?

Kai cocked a brow at him before blinking a few times.

Why did he stop? He'd just welcomed him with open arms. Sure it'd be the first hug they'd shared for.. a while now, but they had to just rip the band-aid off at some point right?

"Do I smell or something?"

Ray chuckled, "I mean, I _can_ smell whiskey on you."

Taking Kai's words as an invitation to get closer, already his legs under the covers searching out Kai's and entangling with them, slowly reaching out and ran his hand up Kai's chest to where it came to settle over his breast bone. Feeling him breathe under the palm of his hand, he had missed this.

Automatically wrapping the arm he had behind his head around Ray's shoulder Kai pulled him in close and nestled his face into loose black hair as he breathed him in. He too had missed this but the closeness wasn't settling the underlying bout of anxiety that sat in his stomach now at the thought of seeing the redhead in the flesh again under these circumstances.

He'd hoped he could just keep him as a flirty text thread to pass the time… Who knows what tomorrow was going to bring now? What it was going to spark?

Placing a kiss on Ray's head he could tell he had dozed off after a few minutes though Kai just laid there. His guilty mind keeping him awake for hours before sleep finally took him at 3am.

They could get through this.. They _had_ to get through this.


	15. Just Deserts

A/N: I'm a week late.. I apologise. However life has been just a tad busy. I got back from visiting my r/l Tyson back end of last week and then I was thrown straight back into work and it's just been crazy.

For anyone interested in it I have a short fic documenting our friendship featuring true events called "Long Distance." Cute little Tyka Friend Fluff.

Buuut back to this absolute shit storm.

The darling that is Lux helped with this, but seriously don't even ask who was who. This chapter was an inbred mess where we reguarly swapped characters. Was only Pierre, bless him, who didn't get tossed about. xD

I know a few of you have been looking forward to this.. and again sorry to keep you waiting longer but I hope it's worth it.

K~

* * *

Chapter 15 - Just Deserts

"Remind me why we're doing this again?" Tala groaned out, dragging his feet along the pavement with his arms folded over his chest like a sulking teenager being forced to see some distant relatives at Christmas.

When he'd first heard Bianca bring up the idea of a double date whilst he was contortioned underneath Kai's desk he thought his darling wife was just being friendly.

One of those, 'Oh we should totally do that!' - And then never do that moments..

But when she'd announced this morning over her tea with _one_ sugar the two of them would be joining 'Mr Hiwatari and his partner' tonight for dinner it became immediately apparent that she was in fact deadly serious.

Tala had tried to get out of it. Practically begged her in fact.

He argued it was 'weird as hell' to be going out with two total strangers.

Bianca argued it would be 'great for the two of them to get out the house and to get to know some new people.'

So, obviously they comprised..

.. And the two of them were going out for dinner tonight with Kai Hiwatari and his partner.

Bianca tutted.

This again?

"Why not?" She asked as she shot him a look, "Like I said, you can use some more friends."

Tala scoffed at her, "I've got plenty of friends' _thanks_."

He knew what Bianca really meant was he could use some _better_ friends. Ones in higher places and not 'riff-raff' she claimed his current associates to be. Which was hilarious because she'd met her brother right?

Legit felon!

Bianca snorted in response, turning her nose up before a sharp hiss left her lips and she had to stop in her tracks. Bending slightly forward as she rubbed at her stomach, waiting for the small jolt of pain to pass through before she practically brushed it off and kept going.

"What if I want more friends?" She asked as if nothing had even happened.

Tala's head snapped towards her upon hearing her gasp out.

"You alright?" He asked, his voice laced with concern as he brushed off what she'd said and placed a hand behind her back.

Maybe someone up there was watching him after all and knew this evening would be a bad idea.

Work with this Tala c'mon!

"We can just turn around and go back home if you're not feeling good? I can run you a bath and we can get all snuggly on the couch?" He suggested, sounding almost too hopeful as the restaurant was in sight now.

"No, just the baby in my ribs again." Bianca brushed off, though leaned into his touch. "You know how much she likes getting in there-"

"-We _really_ can just reschedule if you want, no one would mind B, seriously.."

Practically cutting her off Tala's tone was becoming more pleading with every step they took. He was running out of time!

"And turn around and go _all_ the way home, it's right there Tal." She bit back in a huff, throwing an arm up and pointing at the brick building. "And it would be rude to just walk back home, they're probably already there."

With his feet coming to a standstill Tala used his other arm to wrap around her and gently pull her back around to face him. Taking her hands in his and looking right into her green eyes.

"They'd understand Bianca. Come on, you're heavily pregnant. If you're not feeling good we should just go home. Don't worry about it. Tell you what, I'll call us a cab right now." He said pulling out his cell phone from his pocket and started dialling a number.

Bianca frowned as she snatched it, "I'm _fine_, just a bit winded so the sooner we can sit down the better since I'm so _'heavily'_ pregnant. What is your problem tonight?" She asked as she pushed by him, keeping his phone in her hand as she continued without him.

Tala felt a pang of uneasiness of his phone currently being clutched by those polished fingernails and jogged a little to catch up to walk alongside her again. He was running out of options here and his desperation to get out of this evening was really starting to show.

"I'm just worried about you baby that's all. I don't want you to feel like you gotta push yourself to try and impress this guy or somethin'.. He's honestly not all that y'know."

"Who said anything about me trying to impress someone?" She asked as she snapped back to face him, "Not like I'm very impressive being so _'heavily'_ pregnant to start with." She continued to use his line, hoping he'd catch on that he was one foot closer to sleeping on the couch tonight.

Tala suppressed an eye roll.

This night really was going to be a living nightmare if she was fixing to start on him before they'd even got through the door.

"You're gorgeous babe and you know it." He sighed out. "I just know how you get around new people and I'm telling you, you _really_ don't have to put on a front with them.. If you're not feeling great we can leave."

Bianca just narrowed her eyes at him, she was done talking and threw her nose back in the air and kept forward. She'd go by herself then. Seriously though, what was getting his knickers in such a twist tonight?

* * *

x-x-x

Kai's hands were gripped on to the steering wheel. His knuckles starting to turn white as they were just a few blocks away from the restaurant now. There'd been no message from Tiffany informing him of any cancellation so he could only assume Tala had failed to get out of this one too.

Wasn't he meant to be the smooth talker? Useless.

"You okay? You're awfully quiet tonight." Ray said as he was doing his last minute pruning in the visors mirror.

"Mhm.. just tired." Kai mumbled out in response, his eyes remaining fixed on the road.

Ray gave him a quick questioning look, that didn't really seem right. It had been a pretty chill day, for the both of them, and they actually slept together for the first time like a couple again. His heart stopped at that thought. Maybe Kai didn't sleep as well as he did then, because it was too hard on him being like that again.

"We don't have to stay long, just get some food and drinks and be home before ten." He compromised, if Kai was tired and upset about the night before then he didn't want to keep him out in the crowds for too long.

Kai nodded in response though hadn't listened to a word Ray had just said. His mind was racing, not even being able to envision how this night was going to go.

His eyes then trailed across to the restaurant on their right as they pulled up. Having tried to drive as slow as he possibly could all the way here but could only stall for so long before it became obvious.

Flipping up the visor Ray sat back in his seat, giving Kai one last look over with a slight frown on his face. Sure, the whole premise of this double date was a bit odd to say the least, but it was better than them avoiding each other inside the house and staring at the walls until the painful task of going to bed was commenced.

"Ready?"

'_No.'_

"Mhm.." Kai spared him a look as he slowly unclipped his seat belt.

Glancing up through the windshield his eyes glared over to the restaurant as he prayed it'd just burst into flames right there and then.

This was it. No getting out of it now.

"Let's go."

Ray didn't bother to say more, following him out of the car quietly and smoothing out his shirt and messing with his hair a bit more. Having left it all out for the night, no ties or bindings which he was slowly regretting as it was already knotting up like he knew it would.

* * *

x-x-x

Tala nervously tapped his fingers on the white linen table cloth as he glanced between the two empty chairs in front of him. He was starting to feel nauseous now never mind fixing to eat a meal.

_'Come on unborn child of mine, help daddy out and give your mother another kick or something..'_

Bianca's eyes took in everything at once, this place was beautiful but of course she hadn't really expected any less when dining with Kai Hiwatari.

As her eyes kept roaming she eventually caught sight of the familiar two-toned hair stepping in, a mass of long dark-purple coming in with him. Excitedly she smacked Tala in the arm and pointed to the two coming in; if she could she'd bounce in her seat.

Tala tutted and simultaneously shot her a frown before icy blues fixed on what Bianca was getting his attention for and his stomach almost dropped out his ass.

Kai looked as riddled with nerves as he did, a hand stuffed in his black trouser pocket as the other was shaking the maître d's hand at the foyer.

How the two of them were going to blag their way through this was beyond him. Hopefully Bianca and the cat would be doing most of the talking since _they_ were the ones who wanted this shit show.

"They're both so gorgeous." Bianca said as she fanned herself a little in jest, "Is this why you've been in such a tizz all night?" She jabbed more playfully than she had been since they left the house.

"Sure." Tala sarcastically replied with a scowl and picked up the glass of water in front of him. Taking a few sips he watched Kai over the glass as he and Ray were led over by the restaurant manager.

"Your table gentlemen." The middle-aged male introduced in a strong French accent.

Kai swallowed as he locked eyes with blue for a second before quickly breaking the contact.

Placing his glass back down on the table Tala cleared his throat and pressed his lips together to supress the smirk that was daring to appear. He had no reason to laugh as this scenario wasn't funny in the slightest but his nerves were reaching off the scale now that Kai was here.. with _him._

How the fuck did they get in this mess?

Either ignoring the weird vibes coming off Kai or just not paying attention, Ray painted on a smile as he got behind his chair in front of the woman and held his hand out.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, I'm Ray."

Bianca's eyes sparkled and instantly held out her hand, loving the high class feeling this evening was bringing thus far.

"So good to meet you, I'm Bianca but you can call me B. This is my husband Tala." She directed once they had shaken hands and Ray was sitting down in his chair.

Ray blinked a little, oh so that was his name?

"Good to see you again."

"Likewise," Tala dryly responded with a single nod, his attention barely on him as he instantly glanced up at the suit clad male that was going to be sitting directly opposite him for the duration of this evening.

Of course he was. Where else would Kai have sat? Furthest away from him? Nah that would've made this dinner slightly more bearable and he of course didn't deserve that!

Whoever had originally been watching him from above must've clocked out for the night.

".. And you Kai, nice to see you again." He added as innocent as he could, the two shots of vodka he did before leaving the house coming into play once Kai had draped his jacket on his chair and sat down in front of him.

Kai sent him a brief look before mimicking his words.

"Likewise."

Ray just nervously glanced between Kai and Tala, that was a little rude but not wholly unlike Kai to begin with. Given their other issues they were burying for the night he tried not to let it bother him.

"Can I get you some drinks for the table?" The Frenchman then asked once everyone was settled and offered a menu in Kai's direction.

Without so much as taking the menu Kai waved him off before casually speaking out, "A bottle of Cristal will do Pierre, thank you."

His gaze then trailed over towards Bianca when he remembered her current impregnated state and gasped.

"No! Actually – sorry. What would you like to drink Mrs Ivanov?" He blurted out in a slight fluster, raising a hand to stop Pierre from leaving with his eyes fixed on the lady of the table.

"Oh no, you three enjoy your drinks tonight. I'll be fine with some water." Bianca waved off politely.

Kai gave her a nod though turned back to Pierre and had a brief back and forth in French, ordering her a sparkling fruit juice. He couldn't have her just sat drinking water.

Was the _least_ he could do considering all he'd done with her husband.

Ray then turned his attention back to Bianca and gave her another smile.

"How far along are you?" He asked, hoping it wouldn't set her off.

"8 months," She replied returning his smile, "Only a few more weeks to go!"

"Congratulations! That's amazing." Ray gushed, he loved babies.

Bianca continued to smile warmly to him. Aw he was the sweetest thing! Kai better be treating him right..

Tala felt sick to his stomach, half due to trying to keep himself from laughing about the whole situation or actual nerves setting in harder than before.

"What did you order?" He finally had the guts, what was left of them, to address Kai as he hadn't understood a word that was said.

Kai's eyes shot up to Tala, admittedly a little caught off guard he'd actually had the balls to speak to him but of course they had to act like they didn't really know each other and were attempting to change that.

Wasn't exactly a lie though. Whilst they were more than familiar with each other physically, Kai didn't actually know a damn thing about the guy.. But nor did he really care.

"Champagne and a sparkling cranberry and lime juice for the lady." He answered gesturing over towards Bianca. "I hope you don't mind Mrs Ivanov but I couldn't possibly have you sat here sipping on just water whilst we have Cristal."

Bianca put a hand to her chest, "That's so sweet Mr Hiwatari, you didn't have to but thank you, that sounds lovely."

Kai smirked some. "Please, just call me Kai."

His eyes then tauntingly locked back on Tala's.

The moment they clicked Tala's leg shot out from under the table, getting him in the leg.

Kai shifted, biting back the pain as he instantly sent him a glare across the table.

"Are you two wanting children one day?" Bianca asked her green eyes glancing between Kai and Ray opposite her.

Ray's smile he had been wearing since they got to the table fell slightly, his eyes shifting almost nervously to Kai.

"We haven't really talked about it..." He answered in almost a sigh.

He had wanted to bring it up, were plenty of times that he almost did but then life would remind him they were too busy for children let alone too busy for each other half the time now.

"I would love to be a father though one day." He then added, perking up some and deciding to throw the hint Kai's way regardless.

Kai cleared his throat and swallowed.

Where was this damn champagne Pierre? If they were going to start gushing over marriage and babies he'd need to start drinking ASAP.

"Aw well you've plenty of time." Bianca said waving her hand at them. "It's a big thing and you shouldn't rush into things like that.. Trust me, _we_ of all people know."

Tala held in the groan he felt bubbling up inside him, trying hard to ignore Ray's not so subtle look over at him like he was waiting for him to elaborate. Thankfully Ray turned his attention back to his wife instead.

"I take it this isn't your first then?" He guessed.

Bianca shook her head, "Nope we have Natalia who's three. Total handful but completely worth it."

Kai's jaw clenched as glanced back up at Tala, his expression remaining plain though his eyes held a rage Satan himself would falter to. He didn't even know why he was surprised thinking about it now. Honestly he knew Tala was a fucking dog but that was just the cherry on the cake.

"Are you having one of each or both girls then?" Ray asked quickly as he gestured at Bianca's belly.

"Another girl." Bianca gushed though felt a little uneasy now at being the clear centre of attention of the table. She should've just arranged to have dinner with Ray since these two wet blankets sat in silence beside them were looking just as awkward as the other.

"Ooo, that's gonna be rough when they're older." Ray sympathized as his eyes went back towards Tala while for the first time since that day did Mariah pop into his head.

An involuntary shiver ran down his back, he couldn't imagine living under the same roof with three females.

Tala tried to ignore him again but the shifty eyes finally got under his skin enough, he couldn't bite his tongue all night.

"Believe me, it's already rough."

Bianca threw a glare towards her left before quickly forcing out a laugh trying to brush off her _darling_ husband's comment.

"He doesn't mean that."

If he wasn't sleeping on the couch before he definitely was now.

"I didn't mean that in a bad way." Tala said as his body jolted more upright, "Just think about it, I'm the only guy in the house now. What when the girls start reaching womanhood it's not going to be fun. You can't really argue with me on that one B."

Kai pulled the corners of his lips down slightly as he listened.

The dog had a point.

He couldn't imagine living with one female, never mind three of them, though, Tala did deserve everything he got at this point.

Bianca just silently rolled her eyes at him.

They'd talk about this when they got home.

Showing her up in front of high profile guests.

Making out that she was _anything_ but a constant fucking delight.

How dare he!

Pierre then promptly reappeared with an ice bucket for the champagne and the tall glass of fruit juice for Bianca.

Placing it down in front of her, her green eyes sparkled, her earlier annoyance at Tala a moment ago diminishing a little as she sent a nod of thanks in Kai's direction.

Nodding his head back to her Pierre then handed everyone a menu and waited with his pen and little notepad.

"Ladies first. Madame?"

Gazing over her menu she trailed her finger down as she quickly scanned the options. Most of it was written in French and the portion of it that wasn't was stuff she'd never even heard of. She noticed there also wasn't a single price in sight next to any of the dishes.

God how were they going to afford this dinner?

Tala will just have to take care of it.

"I'll take the uhm.." She showed the menu to Pierre and pointed at one of the dishes, not even wanting to attempt to pronounce what she'd decided on.

"Les asperges vertes á la hollandaise.. good choice madam." He rolled off, his accent very strong now.

"Sir?" He asked, his attention turning to the redhead.

Tala did a double take from his menu to his wife and back to the waiter and down again.

Why did she do this to him?!

"Wouldn't happen to have steak would you?" He asked a bit sheepishly.

Kai lifted his menu a little higher to hide the smirk he was trying to bite back. Watching the redhead squirm was a sight alright.

Pierre nodded saving him a glance as he jotted on his notepad.

"Steak au poivre, and how do you like your _meat_ sir?"

"Medium, please." Tala said, resisting the urge to pull at the collar of his shirt as he felt a sweat break over his skin.

Pierre gave a firm nod, always thankful when he didn't have to destroy a good piece of steak with a 'well done' request.

Taking down his order he then looked over to Ray.

"Monsieur Kon?"

"I'll have the usual Pierre, thank you." Ray smiled at him, he always liked him when they came here.

Pierre smiled quickly jotting down on his pad of paper again before turning to Kai.

"And the usual for you as well Monsieur Hiwatari?"

After a moment Kai silently nodded before snapping the menu shut, gave Pierre a half smile of his own and handed the menu back to him.

Pierre then collected the other three menus and took a slight bow to the table before having another brief exchange with Kai before taking his leave.

Taking a few large sips of his champagne Kai was starting to feel a little bit more settled... _a little._

Everyone was on their best behaviour, the food was ordered. It was fine... this would be fine.

"Are you sure that's all you wanted B?" Ray asked after the table had gone quiet for a bit too long.

"Hm?" She asked looking across to him over the rim of her glass.

She had no idea what she'd even ordered but she'd heard of hollandaise before?

Kai frowned looking over to the two of them at the other end of the table.

He hadn't even been paying attention when she'd ordered too engrossed in his own menu and thinking about how Tala _really_ liked his meat.

"What did you order?" He asked her but then turned to Ray knowing Bianca clearly had no clue what was even going on here.

"Les asperges vertes á la hollandaise." Ray told him before turning back to Bianca, "It's just asparagus with hollandaise sauce, it's really good but not that filling."

Bianca's cheeks flushed.

Did she keep face and just go along with it?

She was starving but she didn't want to seem unrefined and admit that she had no idea what the majority of the menu said in front of them, especially to full on French speaking Kai Hiwatari over there.

Her and Tala could always grab a burger on the way home..

"Yeah, no it's fine. I'm not all that hungry. I might get a desert though after if I still am." She saved, throwing a quick smile.

Ray frowned a little, but what more could he really do?

A shiver went down his spine as he took a sip of his champagne, his eyes going back towards Tala who was oddly staring at him now for some reason. Was it something he said, had done?

He didn't mean to offend, he was just thinking of the baby!

"I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to come off as offensive." He apologized quickly to Bianca.

Bianca waved her hands at him. Bless! He was so lovely!

"You didn't! Don't be silly! Kai, please tell your boyfriend he's the sweetest thing ever and he doesn't need to worry, he didn't offend me."

Kai gave a small laugh through his nose hoping that would be enough of an acknowledgement to her. He wasn't exactly one to gush over Ray on a normal day never mind in public and _especially _not in front of strangers.

Ray blushed a little, that was good and all but what was with Tala staring at him the way he had been then?

Tala honestly hadn't even been paying attention to the fact that he was staring at him the way he was.

One thing, aside from the blaring obvious issue with him sitting across from Kai after everything, something had been bothering him.

He didn't know the full tale between the two of them of course. But enough to know something wasn't quite sitting right.

Ray had gone to China with 'big tits', completely ghosted Kai for however long…

Not suspicious at all by the way.

But then he comes back home and everything's all fine and dandy? Only it clearly wasn't as the tension between the two of them Tala noticed could be cut with a knife.

Hell, he knew Kai wasn't the most talkative of guys but even _he_ got more words out of him… Well, he definitely got more _sounds_ out of him.

Why was Kai just settling for this guy when he could do so much better?

Kai had noticed the odd glances between Ray and Tala during the course of the evening so far and annoyingly for him it was clear he had something else in common with the redhead it would seem – Poker face expressions.

When he wasn't sporting a wolfish grin Tala's face often wouldn't give much away in regards of what he was thinking. He couldn't read him.

Whilst it was obvious they were sharing the same bout of nerves right now he couldn't quite work out what else could be on Tala's mind.

After several minutes of _very_ brief chit chat Pierre thankfully came back, breaking the silence and placed each of their chosen dishes down in front of them.

Bianca blinked at the four pieces of asparagus with the trickle of hollandaise sauce in front of her and they all began to eat quietly.

"So what is the 'usual' for you two?" She asked looking over at both Kai and Ray's plates to make conversation.

Ray smiled a little, "It's Boeuf Bourguignon, just a really fancy word for beef stew, but it's got some red wine and bacon in it. With that I'm pretty much sold anyways." He chuckled.

"Ahh.. that looks nice.." She murmured out practically salivating over it, wishing she'd paid more attention in French class now. "And you Kai?"

"Bouillabaisse," He purred out, his French accent almost as good as Pierre's.

"It's basically a seafood stew… Has different kinds of fish, oysters, potato that kinda thing." He quickly reeled off, not wanting to bore the table with his knowledge of French cuisine.

"Ooh oysters?" Bianca sang out, her lipstick clad lips suddenly curling up into a smirk and her eyes glanced to Ray and then back to Kai. "Aren't they an aphrodisiac?"

Kai blinked a few times.

"Uh, so they say?" He replied a little uneasy and unsure. Couldn't say he believed in any of that stuff.

"Hear that Ray? Looks like _someone's_ getting lucky tonight." She threw a wink at him, her smirk still prominent as she took a sip on her sparkling juice cocktail.

Ray's blush came back as he about choked on his next bite of food. The fuck was she going off about?! And _why_?!

"Mhmmm..." He hummed around his fork, not looking up and letting his bangs come over his face to hide it. Thankful he just left his hair alone for the night, could hide under all of it if he wanted to.

Tala made a face as he cut into his steak, watching with satisfaction as the bit of blood oozed out from it with the grease.

Kai couldn't help but die a little of embarrassment for both Ray and himself as he took a quick side glance to him, the blush on his cheeks clearly visible.

It'd be a Christmas miracle if either of them were to get lucky this evening since the two of them had only just got back to cuddling last night and even _that_ made him feel a type of way.

He swore he could still smell the pink thing's scent all over him, he wasn't sure he could take any more steps further whilst it still lingered. Not yet anyway.

Taking a mouthful of his own food ruby eyes then dared to look directly ahead of him at Tala who, like for the majority of the evening, was remaining uncharacteristically quiet, his eyes just fixed down on his plate.

He was really expecting to be made to squirm tonight with the redhead's usual confidence always dominating. Taking a quick glance to the woman beside him, it was becoming evident however who really wore the trousers in his relationship.

Noting Ray and his wife had fallen back in to their own deep conversation again after swiftly moving on from the earlier moment of awkwardness, Tala dared to slowly ease out his phone slyly under the table, keeping his gaze down low and touch typed a text to the male opposite.

With a ping and his phone vibrating in his back pocket Kai arched a brow, pulled out his phone and swiped before his face fell a little for a second.

T: [U look hot as hell.]

He glanced over at the sender who had just resumed cutting into his steak like he wasn't just on his phone a second ago.

Did he just ignore it? Yeah.. he was ignoring it.

Shoving it back into his pocket Kai reached for his champagne and took a sip, his unimpressed eyes locking with the redhead over the glass who sent him a quick smile when he glanced up from his plate.

_'Playing hard to get again I see..' _Tala thought to himself seeing that Kai had no intentions of responding to him.

He discreetly took his phone out once again as another idea came to him.

With another buzz, Kai looked straight ahead at the culprit who once again was playing innocent taking a sip of his own champagne.

He knew he was relentless but this guy needed to learn about timings.

Ray was right there. His _wife_ was right fucking _there! _They weren't doing this anymore! He might have a death wish, but he certainly didn't.

Bianca looked like she wouldn't hesitate to throw hands, pregnant or not, and he knew if needed, Ray had sharp claws.

He continued to pretend he'd not just felt the vibration against his leg though couldn't ignore the leather shoe that had started brushing against his calf.

Tala sent him a smirk before gesturing down with his eyes for him to look at his phone.

Kai took a quick glance to his left before pulling his phone out again and opening the message, only to quickly turn it face down on his thigh and send him a glare.

Really Tala? Of all the times to send a fucking dick pic you think this is one of them?

Tala pressed his lips together, the laugh at Kai's reaction threatening to escape him.

God if he could see his face right now.

Kai looked to his phone again to read the line of text that was attached under the image.

T: [Come talk with me in the bathroom.]

He would have scoffed at that if he was alone. He'd do nothing of the sort.

[Whatever you have to say you can say it here.] Was his reply.

A smirk curled on Tala's lips. - [Nope, I can't.]

K: [Why? Cat got your tongue?]

T: [No, but he might have urs later tonight Mr. Aphrodisiac.]

Kai took another sly glance down to read the response, his expression now mirroring Tala's for a moment.

[Is that a hint of jealousy I'm sensing?]

Tala's smirk only got bigger at the reply, [Why, u want me to be?]

Kai took a glance over at him as he took a mouthful of food, catching the famous Ivanov smirk in full force before glancing back down to his phone.

[Just saying if you are there's no reason to be.]

Tala's smirk fell just a tad, [What do you mean?] He typed quickly.

Kai locked his eyes with Tala's over the table.

Both their expressions sharing the same plain unreadable look though it was almost like the two of them were communicating telepathically now; Knowing exactly what the other was thinking.

[Cat got a little too curious in China..] Kai informed, hoping he wouldn't have to spell it out to him further.

[Ur kidding?] Tala typed quickly, his mouth gaping a tad as he took a small glance towards Ray still hiding behind his bangs and eating.

He _knew_ they were off with each other! Knew it!

Kai unnoticeably sighed through his nose. Losing his appetite somewhat as he typed back his reply.

[Wish I was.]

Tala choked on his next piece of steak, about jabbing the fork down his throat as his eyes bugged out of his head as he read the text.

A noise of some kind coming out of his throat that gathered Ray and Bianca's attention.

"You okay?" Ray asked, watching Tala spit and splutter as he pulled the fork from within his throat.

Kai's eyes widened as he quickly shoved his phone back into his trouser pocket. His eyes darting to the other two at the table.

Bianca patted his back a few times, "You're meant to chew your food Tal."

"Yes dear... I know..." Tala coughed and choked, taking up his glass and knocking it back as much as he could. Half wishing it was something stronger.

Kai quietly continued eating his food like the little scene before him had never occurred.

He wasn't even sure why he'd told him in the first place. He just needed to vent perhaps.

Keeping the secret of Ray's infidelity to himself had felt like a massive weight on his shoulders ever since he'd told him. He hadn't told any of their other friends as he hadn't wanted to tarnish Ray's shiny reputation. But, he just needed to get it out.

Slamming his now empty glass down, Tala righted himself by clearing his throat. "Where's the bathroom?" He asked, his eyes on Kai looking somewhat pleading.

"Near the door where we came in at and to the right." Ray answered.

Catching the blatant hint from him Kai too cleared his throat after swallowing another mouthful of food and eased himself up from the table.

"I'll show you.. Please, excuse us," Kai added with a slight bow of his head more for Bianca's benefit and turned on his heel heading back towards the front of the restaurant.

"Is he okay?" Ray asked Bianca once the other two were gone, having watched Kai walk off with him and found himself frowning slightly.

Sure, things were already off since before they left the house, but something in the air smelled different now and he didn't know what.

Bianca nodded her head that was resting on her cupped hands, her elbows on the table.

"Yeahh he's fine. Always was the melodramatic.. So tell me more about you and Kai." She dreamily asked.

* * *

x-x-x

The second the bathroom door was closed Tala turned to Kai who had followed him like the good dog he was, his wolfish grin coming out to play in full force as he took him in more properly.

"Clean up well, don't you think?" He asked as he did a little twirl to show off his own suit.

"Mhm. Put on a good performance too." Kai dryly said brushing him off.

Whatever Tala had to say he'd better spit it out, they couldn't stay in here long without raising suspicions.

"Look, I _tried_ to get out of this, believe me. She wouldn't budge." Tala practically whined at him, "But really, you think I look good?" He distracted again as he gestured down at himself.

"Well you should've tried harder," Kai bit out. "And sure, Bianca dress you again I'm guessing?"

Tala's hands went to his hips as he pouted, "Oh please, I'm a big boy now and can dress myself. But of course..." He said, his voice going slightly seductive as he sauntered up to Kai. "You know all about that, don't you?"

Kai immediately took a step back from him and took a glance at the door.

"Really Tala? You didn't learn your lesson from before?"

"Oh c'mon, it's like the first time all over again." Tala purred a little in excitement as he touched Kai's chest, walking his fingers up it as he followed the buttons of his shirt. "Besides, it's not like she can walk in here. And with the cat straying off, you should put those oysters to good use."

Kai gave him a bored look as his eyes continued to occasionally glance over his shoulder to the door behind him.

Now he regretted telling him about Ray because he was going to try and use it as fuel so he can continue to live out whatever twisted fantasy he was trying to live.

"If you keep playing with fire like this Tala you're gonna get burnt." He said in a low tone of warning.

"Is that a promise?" Tala asked as his wolfish grin took over his face again, leaning as close to Kai as he could.

Kai tilted his head away from him.

This scene really was bringing back memories.

The first occurrence they'd crossed a line in a bathroom stall was just the start of the slippery slope, just the start of what fuelled Kai's desires on wanting more.

He wanted more. He _got _more. It had all led to the night they'd gone past the point of no return and Kai had hoped it would satisfy the hunger, but it didn't.

He had sworn to himself after getting in his car and driving away from his office that _that_ was the last time. Convinced himself they were done, and with Ray home now that should've been cemented.

Though the second Ray's own affair was brought to light Kai was back to square one, lusting after the wolf.

All the dirty messages, promises of what Tala would do to him given the opportunity again.

Kai had wanted this chance again, to be this close to him, to be alone with him.

But he couldn't. Not with Ray a few feet beyond those walls. And not after all he had done for him and said to him last night.

It had all been fairly easy to mess around with him thousands of miles away, like an asshole Kai never gave him a second thought. But even with Ray's own infidelity cursing his mind, now that he was in the moment, he couldn't.

Last night, as strange as it felt at first, felt sorta nice to have Ray back in his arms again.

The familiarity of his body against his bringing him some solace.

They had to fix this, and starting this toxic cycle again once more with Tala wasn't going to do that.

As tempting as it was, and by _god_ how tempting this all was with him looking as good as he was tonight, Kai knew that Ray was trying, and he had to end this.

"We're not doing this anymore Tala." Kai firmly spoke out, holding his ground as the redhead took a step closer towards him once more.

"You keep saying that, but you followed me in here when you didn't have to." Tala said with a dull voice as he closed the distance and caressed a finger up and down Kai's chest again.

Kai scoffed. He wasn't wrong, but, whatever.

"Please, you practically begged me to with your eyes.. I just figured you had something important to say but my mistake, won't happen again. I should really know by now nothing of any substance comes out of that mouth of yours." He bit out, turning on his heel from him and heading towards the bathroom door.

"Except your cum." Tala bit back.

Kai stopped in his tracks and turned back to face him, his mouth opening to speak but no words came. He just stared at him, shaking his head slightly as a faint smirk that had no business being there dared to creep on to his lips.

Wow.

"And since I _begged_ you and you followed, that says a lot more about you than me, don't ya think?" Tala continued since he got silence from him, "You can keep playing these games, the only one you're burning is yourself here Hiwatari. Obviously there's a reason you've wanted this, so why not just spit it out already?"

Kai was done with the child's play. They all wanted the two of them to get to know each other?

Fine. Let's get to know each other.

"I could ask you the same question," He spat back. "You've a gorgeous wife, not just one kid on the way but a _three year old_ who's probably the _spitting_ image of you, and yet you're here pointing fingers. Why do _you_ want this Tala?" Kai tried to keep his voice down but the rage this man before him brought was something else.

"And? What's your point? It's my life let me fuck it up how I want to. Now, I'm fine with being a nice piece of ass, 'cus I am one, but what more are you looking for here?"

Tala had an idea of what it was the CEO was after but he wanted to hear him say it. Wanted him to admit it. Maybe the two of them could come to some sort of agreement here... A business deal if you will.

"Why do you _never_ answer any fucking question that's thrown at you?! Just be honest! For once in your fucked up little life. You want to screw around so bad and throw away what you have, cool great. But why?!" Kai hurled at him, partly asking himself the same question though deep down he already knew the answer.

Tala held a fire just like his only the redhead's burned a little darker. It was menacing. Mischievous. Kai desired a fire that would out scorch his, and he just didn't have that with Ray.

"Because I asked you first." Tala answered like he were talking to his child.

Kai held the bridge of his nose. He was getting on his last nerve right about now. The guy was fucking impossible.

"Me and Ray hadn't been great for a while." He finally admitted in a frustrated sigh. "Whole thing became stagnant. Boring. You came along and life got a little exciting again… There."

"And you want to give it up why, because he's back? Why not just toss the cat out with the rest of the mangy strays?"

"And _then_ what Tala?" Kai bit, "I get rid of him and then what? Me and you go live happily ever after? You gonna leave your wife and two kids?"

Tala rolled his eyes, "As if, she'd send her maniac brother to come and cut our dicks off."

Kai frowned at the horrible imagery before shaking it off. "So even more reason to stop fucking around and just try and go back to how things were before.. before _this._" He said gesturing between the two of them.

Tala arched a brow at that, "You're going to make yourself miserable if you don't cut that leash."

"Likewise." Kai spat back.

"What does that even mean in a moment like this?" Tala asked in an exasperated tone.

"You think it's not blatantly obvious how miserable you are with her? Now you answer my question. Where the hell do I fit in with your, as you say, fucked up life?"

Tala squirmed where he stood, he hadn't really thought too much of the answer to that. It all just started with him being able to get his rocks off since Bianca didn't put out all that much anymore. But then it got so much deeper.

Kai made him feel how a man should be made to feel. Desired. In control.

Hell, he couldn't remember the last time Bianca looked at him as anything other than an annoyance but the way those crimson eyes drank him up.. Mmm.. He just knew he did something to him and he wanted to keep on doing it.

"You pretty much just answered your own question." Tala answered with a slight eye roll, "If it's that obvious I'm miserable, why wouldn't I do what anyone else would? Find something better to play with."

"So we're just each other's play things then huh?" Though the wolf's game had become obvious the second he'd seen him and his wife interact it didn't make the taste in Kai's mouth any sweeter.

"What else would you call this?" Tala asked as he gestured between the two of them, "No way in hell am I leaving her with her brother alive. And hell, you do whatever you want with the cat that's not my business."

Kai already knew he couldn't leave Ray. He could tell anyone that for free. No matter how much it hurt finding out about what he did he knew he had no place to talk.

"We're not calling this anything because it's _nothing_. Like I said, we need to just stop this and go back to our normal lives. Delete each others numbers, for _good,_ and forget this ever happened."

He was getting irritated now. Sure it was shit for the pair of them in their respective relationships but it was going to get better between him and Ray. They were going to be able to rebuild, get over the heartache and come back stronger than before.

Tala's own wave of frustration flowed through him, the answer to both their problems was clear as day in his eyes.

"Obviously he can't give you what I can, and you know that and I know that because you _said_ it. If they never find out then why not keep doing what we like?" He asked, he wasn't one for begging and maybe this sounded like it but that power trip he felt, that rush when he got Kai on his back was nothing like he had ever felt before.

He wanted it, he _needed_ it. Who cared if he got burnt? That's what made it more thrilling, worth every scratch and mark left on him.

He took a chance, if Kai was really done with this then he would have already been gone before this dragged out the way it had.

Stepping up to him again he didn't give heed or warning as he pulled him by the shirt, forcing their mouths together in a bruising kiss that about knocked his own balance off.

Kai was just about to open his mouth to speak when Tala's lips crashed against his own. Grabbing hold of his arms to steady himself his eyes snapped shut and his tongue wasted no time in making its way into the wolf's mouth.

The second Kai's tongue slipped in, Tala pushed him off of him. Keeping his hold on the front of Kai's shirt as he stared into his eyes with a cold stare of his own.

"Now after all that, what you just kept going on about stopping this, you're willing to continue?" He asked, more just as a confirmation that this could be something. Label or not, it needed to be cemented somewhere that they were going to keep crossing that line with each other. He needed this. This side release. Shit, Kai clearly did too. All they had to do was verbally agree with each other.

"Just… Stop fucking talking." Kai panted out before grabbing the back of Tala's head and pressed his lips against his once more.

This was wrong, he knew it was. So why was this making him feel better? Every flick and twirl their tongues made against each other, slowly healing the cuts on his heart that had been there the moment Ray confessed.

He knew Tala wanted him to admit something to him out loud. But he couldn't play the villain role. It may have suited him once upon a time, but this couldn't keep going.

He was screaming at himself, this couldn't keep going! Though Kai's hands found themselves fumbling with Tala's buttons on his shirt, undoing them quickly as their lips stayed locked.

Getting the first two buttons undone on his shirt was all Tala allotted him, pushing Kai off of him again and backing him into the biggest stall before shutting and locking the door behind them.

Licking his already swelling lips with his tongue slowly he crowded Kai against the wall next to the toilet, just enough space for the two of them to stand there comfortably, going back in for another demanding kiss that left his head in a fog and his hands fumbling against Kai's body as he gripped and groped under his clothes.

With them in the privacy of the stall now Kai felt more daring, the three glasses of champagne only fuelling him further as his hands found themselves unbuckling Tala's leather belt. If they were going to do this they needed to be quick, who knows how long they'd been in here already for.

Pulling their mouths apart, but keeping close and going for Kai's neck, Tala nipped at the pale skin there as his hips moved against Kai's. Aware he was already fiddling with his pants, letting him have at it for the moment until the best idea to ever cross his mind flickered through.

Why bother getting his pants and knees dirty when Kai could do all the work? Was his fault they were all there to start with, and he still needed to return the favour..

Snaking his arms around Kai's neck, his hands going to the back of his hair where he gripped onto the darker locks he pulled Kai's head back to look at him.

"Down." Was the command in a harsh breath that ghosted over Kai's face.

Kai faintly gasped out at the tight grip on his hair, his mouth staying open slightly from where Tala's lips had abruptly left them, as his lust filled eyes gazed back at him.

This was a role reversal. Though he figured last time Tala _was_ just left hanging underneath his desk.

Licking his lips Kai kept his eyes locked on his as he slowly sank down onto his knees and pulled down Tala's zipper.

"And watch the teeth." Tala reminded as he used his free hand to lean against the wall behind Kai, his body slightly bent over the top of him while his other hand stayed in Kai's hair.

"Thought you were into that kinda thing?" Kai teased as he shimmied Tala's boxers down just far enough to release his cock, licking his lips once more and stared up at him.

"And you must like having all your hair ripped out." Tala countered with a brow raised, tightening his hold on Kai's hair as his fingers dug into the back of his scalp.

"Now stop fucking talking."

* * *

x-x-x

Bianca fiddled with her white napkin, the conversation having died down between her and Ray for a good few minutes now.

What the hell were those two doing in there?

Lifting up her glass she finished off her juice and sent a half smile over at Ray once she'd put it back down on the table.

Ray, for the tenth time, tried to find something else to talk about and glanced over at the empty seat beside him.

Maybe Kai got up and went home, left him there to fend for himself. Wouldn't put it past him to already be changing the locks on the doors right now either. This was what he got for being a dirty lying cheat, he deserved this.

Taking up Kai's forgotten glass of champagne he sunk into his seat, knocking it back just in time for Pierre to step up to the table to check on them.

"Could I have a bottle of Louis Jadot Bonnes-Mares Grand Cru for the table please?" He asked once the glass of champagne was gone, needing some kind of kick tonight.

Bianca blinked and looked between Ray and Pierre who simply nodded and left to get the bottle.

"You okay Ray?" She asked, having noticed the little kitten's mood seemed to have dropped incredibly low now.

"Oh, I'm alright thank you. How're you holding up?" Ray asked, taking in her empty plate that had been empty for a while now considering what she got. "Did you want something else? I don't mind ordering for you or..." He stopped, glancing down at his bowl of half eaten fancy beef stew. "You want this?" He asked with a weird crack to his voice.

Bianca would've been lying if she said she hadn't been eyeing up his plate since Pierre first brought it to the table.

"Would it be weird if I said yes?" She asked noticeably cringing slightly. This place was clearly super fancy and eating off someone else's plate would more than likely have been deemed beyond uncouth but she was fucking starving.

"Not at all, please have at it." Ray said as he moved the plates around, taking her empty one and putting it down where his was, giving her the stew instead.

Bianca did a quick glance around to check if anyone was watching them do the peasant plate swap before picking up her fork and digging in. With a piece of beef in her mouth she moaned out in delight as it practically melted in her mouth.

This. Was. Heaven!

* * *

x-x-x

Ohh this was heaven!

Tala moaned as Kai dragged his mouth down his shaft slowly, his fingernails about chipping on the wall of the bathroom stall as his legs tensed.

If it weren't for the wall he would have come crashing down on top of him, the hand that had been clinging to Kai's hair through it all having moved and inched its way towards Kai's jawline where he rubbed the pad of his thumb along it. Getting Kai to look up at him, the sight only making this a thousand times better.

Kai stared up at him, his eyes watering slightly from the constant jabs to the back of his throat.

Letting his eyes fall shut he took a hand to the base of him and worked him harder than he had been doing, bobbing his head furiously up and down the length of him as his free hand held on to the back of Tala's thigh to keep him balanced.

As the head of him nudged the back of his already sore throat, he let out a groan as his own cock twitched and pulsed inside his pants.

He needed release but with how long this had already gone on, he knew in the back of his head that wasn't going to happen right now. Thinking of the time only made his head bob faster, his teeth grazing against Tala's shaft and feeling it twitch between his teeth.

The hand holding the base of him squeezed harder, and it was clear Tala was close to the edge now. One more little push and they could get out of there, his knees were killing him.

"Fucking hell Kai.." Tala continued to moan out as he was getting close, the hand he had resting on the wall clenched into a tight fist now as waves as pleasure relentlessly soared through him.

He hadn't had one this good for a while, Bianca never getting on her knees for him anymore, he wasn't sure how much longer he was going to last.

Fuck it.

With his own knees fixing to buckle the hand Tala had on Kai's jaw slithered back into his slate locks, taking a firm grip of them as he pushed Kai's head flat against the cubicle wall and thrust himself down his throat until the twist in his gut became too much and he finally climaxed, releasing his seed down his throat.

With a start Kai about choked, the hand squeezing Tala's cock tightening so hard his knuckles turned white and the one on his leg dug in so deep he left nail indents.

Gaining his bearings he shoved him off of him, spitting and gagging on the thick fluid that had shot down his throat, making his insides twist at the taste and wiping the bit that had trailed down his chin away with the back of his hand.

"Fuck Tala..." He coughed, his voice strained and hoarse as he pulled himself off the floor where his knees popped.

"That's my name.." Tala contently sighed out as he pulled up his boxers though momentarily leaned back against the wall to give himself a minute. His head still a little fuzzy as he came down from his high.

"Mm... You're alright you Hiwatari."

Spitting out what he could into the toilet bowl, Kai stood up straight again with a glare on his face.

"Paid off my debts?" He shot at him, wiping the corner of his mouth with the pad of his thumb.

"And some," Tala smirked, tucking his shirt back into his trousers, pulling up the zipper and buckling his leather belt.

Kai looked him up and down, once again that wave of guilt washing through him once it was all over and the head on his _shoulders_ was back in the drivers seat. The feeling in the pit of his stomach was something awful, but in the moment, whilst they were at it, _that_ was the feeling he craved.. But was the come down really worth it?

All he was thinking about now though was that he needed to get off.. and now.

"I'll be in touch." Was all Kai said to him before opening the stall and darting out the bathroom.

Tala smiled to himself, his icy blues lowering straight to Kai's ass in those tight suit trousers.

He hated to see him go but by _god_ did he love to watch him leave.

Kai might not have openly agreed to a label. He didn't even admit to there being something here. But making future plans was a clear indication they were going to keep on crossing this line, soaking it all up for as long as they could.


	16. The Big Blow

A/N: And here we are again with this absolute shit storm.

Wasn't entirely convinced y'all were going to get this one today but after a few stern words from my wife. (Lux calling me a ninny.) Here it is.

Ps: Thanks for the title love. Anyone else get so caught up with chapter names? No idea why because _no one_ gives a fuck but anyway. xD

Thank you as always for those that are still following this and take the time to review. Makes my day.

Enjoy.

K~

* * *

Chapter 16 - The Big Blow

With his demeanour clearly dishevelled, Kai briskly strode back through the restaurant and over to the table where Bianca and Ray were still sitting in silence.

Plates clear, and _most_ of the glasses empty.

His mind was racing and his heart was fixing to pound out of his chest over everything that had just transpired a few meters away from that perfect head of black hair.

All that had been said, and all that had been done, whirling around his mind, chest and stomach.

He had to get out of here.

Now.

Grabbing his black suit jacket off the back of his chair Kai shoved his arms through as he bent down to sternly whisper into Ray's ear.

"Come on we're going."

"What? Why?" Ray asked, halfway through tipping his sixth glass of red wine back that Pierre had been so kind to bring him.

Kai bore into him, his eyes unintentionally holding a fire as he thought quickly. Now was _really_ not the time to be asking questions.

"Cos those oysters are working, so get your ass in that car so I can take you home and ravage the fuck out of you." He growled into his ear before straightening himself up and turning his attention to Bianca.

"Mrs Ivanov, it's been a pleasure but I've just remembered I have a very important meeting first thing in the morning so we must take our leave."

Ray shivered a little as he took the last bit of his drink, setting it down and trying to stand up as the floor under his feet tilted slightly.

Bianca blinked as she looked between the two men before her getting ready to leave and automatically stood up from the table.

"Oh o-of course I know you're a very busy man, so I appreciate you taking the time out of your schedule for dinner with us." She politely said though couldn't brush off the slight annoyance she felt for having spent the majority of it just with Ray.

"It was lovely meeting you, I'm so sorry." Ray apologized on behalf of both of them, though his words were slightly slurred.

Kai's heart then immediately sank at the smug tone of voice that came from behind him, his plan of a quick getaway failing.

"Where's the fire?" Tala chirped behind them as he approached the table straightening up his jacket and biting into his cheek to stop the wryly grin from spreading across his face.

Ray's eyes widened as he was fighting with putting his own jacket on, "There's a fire?!"

Once green eyes locked on Tala, Bianca's facial expression said it all though refrained from causing a scene in such a swanky place.

God she was going to beat every ounce of arrogance from his body when they got home.

"Kai has a meeting first thing. I was just saying how _nice_ it was for him to schedule this with us." She said to him through slight gritted teeth.

"Oh, well good luck with that meeting tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your night." Tala seemed to ignore her as he sent a smile over at Kai knowing full well he'd just lied to his wife through his teeth.

He couldn't help but find it all amusing and how Ray should actually be thanking him right about now, but knew it wasn't going to come.

"You too, so nice to meet you B and you again Toby." Ray slurred as he finally fought the jacket around him and won.

Tala looked him up and down, his expression holding a faint look of disgust as he once again wondered why the hell Kai dealt with this absolute mess of a man. He'd wanted to correct him but he was clearly that out of it he couldn't be bothered to waste his breath on him.

If he'd have known Ray was this preoccupied though he wouldn't have felt the need to rush back…

"You ready to go babe?" Ray then asked, half way in his jacket and half way out as he turned back to Kai.

Kai cleared his throat and sent him a nod before signalling to Pierre for the check who promptly came over and handed it to him within seconds.

Without even looking at the bill Kai handed over his black credit card before holding his hand out to Bianca, who after glancing at Tala for a second hesitantly placed her hand into his.

Kai knew how he should've felt in this moment, and for a split second he did once her fair hand came into contact with his. The feeling of utter shame and remorse like any normal person would feel having just done what he did to her husband, but like a robot he switched off and opted for the 'professional business man' mode as he lifted her fair hand to his lips and placed a kiss upon it.

"Thank you for a wonderful evening Mrs Ivanov." He purred out looking directly at her before releasing her hand. He would have usually added 'we should do this again sometime', though those words were far from crossing his mind never mind his lips.

Like hell was he going to be doing _any_ of this again.

Bianca's cheeks flushed slightly and she wasn't sure what possessed her to do it but she curtsied for him anyway, clearly getting caught up with the fancy surroundings and the gorgeous man who'd just kissed her hand.

Turning to Tala, Kai then paused as 'robotic business man's' façade slipped for a second when he locked with those eyes that had held such lust for him just minutes ago in the bathroom.

Knowing full well he'd get goosebumps once their skin touched again he reluctantly held out his hand to him, desperate to keep face and carry on the pleasantries.

Tala looked down at it, the thought of making some funny remark that'd make Kai squirm crossing his mind. It was tempting, but he was grateful this evening was coming to an end also. Though, it couldn't have ended any better in his opinion.

Taking Kai's hand he shook it and gave it a tight squeeze. Both of their eyes locked as the two seemed to be having some final telepathic words.

This wasn't the end. He'd see Kai again. It was just a matter of when.

Ray watched the exchange, a dopey smile on his lips as he took up the bottle of wine from the table.

Kai technically bought it, it was theirs now. Right? Who cared, they'd bill him later.

"C'mon, we got oysters to tame!" He then said a little too loudly as he was already trying to walk out on his own stumbling.

Trying to suppress the cringe within him, Kai too matched the squeeze before breaking the hand shake, Tala's thumb ghosting over his skin momentarily before he took his card and receipt from Pierre, shoved them both into his pocket and quickly followed Ray out the door.

The remaining couple watched them leave as Bianca allowed Pierre to help her put on her coat, narrowed eyes quickly turning to glare over at the redhead who's expression seemed blissfully unaware of the fact he was going to be getting a whole new asshole the second they too got out of this restaurant.

Once Kai and Ray were out of sight, Tala turned his attention back to his lady.

"Ready to go my love?" Came his words decorated with a smile, though it immediately dropped off his face when he saw the clear bubbling rage brewing in his, _darling_, wife's eyes.

Swallowing he sheepishly held his head down as Bianca just tutted and stormed out of the restaurant with a hand on her stomach.

* * *

x-x-x

Once he'd caught up to Ray, Kai wrapped an arm around his lower back to support him as they walked back to the parked car.

He felt he could breathe a whole lot easier now that he was out of that damn place and out in the cool night air.

They shouldn't have gone in the first place. Should've just called and cancelled.

Faked his death or something.

_Anything_ to have gotten him out of this evening.

Regardless of how much Ray wanted to go, the whole thing was a bad idea from start to finish, and they just _shouldn't_ have gone.

A-And, if Ray had sat in his seat he wouldn't have had to look at those ridiculously blue eyes and he wouldn't have gone into the damn bathroom for fucks sake!

"Try not to go too fast please, I know you wanna get home and fuck me but my god I feel sick." Ray groaned as his head went back onto Kai's shoulder, thankful for the support since he felt like passing out.

Amidst Kai's internal cursing at himself he took a side glance to him and at the bottle of red Ray was precariously dangling in his grasp and wondered where he'd even got it from.

Truth be told he'd only said he wanted to fuck Ray to get him out of there. They'd only just shared their first hug in bed last night, he couldn't bring himself to have sex with him just yet…

Could he? Seemed pretty tempting with how worked up he was right now…

Whilst keeping them both upright Kai reached into his pocket and pulled out the receipt to scan it, narrowing his eyes a little as his vision hadn't yet adjusted to the dark of the evening.

The bottle of wine had indeed been ordered to the table, and having noticed the price a part of him wished that it hadn't.

"Why are you so drunk Ray?" He almost bit out, though knew the answer as he shoved the receipt back into his pocket.

He'd want him to at least be conscious if he was fixing to take out his sexual frustrations on him. He wasn't after some one night stand scenario with his lover of three years.

"Better question, Kai, is why aren't you?" Ray giggled, god he was hilarious.

"Or... Orrrrr." He slurred, his brain trying to get itself together. "Where the hell did you go?! You know how awkward this already was, didn't need you to go fucking off to the bathroom for half an hour."

Kai tensed, though with the current state Ray was in he could probably reel off the full blown truth of what happened and he wouldn't even bat an eyelid.

Unlocking the car he reached over for the bottle of wine in Ray's hand, the pure stench of booze radiating off of him and dropped it in the trash can as they walked past it.

"Get in the car."

His order came out as a frustrated sigh. He couldn't really tolerate Ray when he was trashed.

"You bitch, that was mine." Ray pouted for a total of three seconds before he flung open the car door and slid into the back seat, pulling his arms around himself in a huff.

He didn't want to sit up front. Not with him.

If he hadn't have disappeared for that length of time making him feel completely unwanted he wouldn't have drank so much in the first place.

Getting in the driver's seat and starting the car, Kai completely ignored the insult and started the journey back to the house, not even caring that Ray had decided to sit in the back either.

He was such a sloppy drunk, the less he had to deal with him right now the better.

Though thinking about it, he'd have preferred it if Ray had actually sat in the front because being beside him he wouldn't have had to look at him, now he was all he saw whenever he glanced up in his rear view mirror.

Ray had proceeded to undo the first few buttons on his shirt, the relief of the night's breeze being short lived and the wine making him feel warmer than usual.

Kai took an automatic glance up and clocked the flushed tanned skin sitting underneath the crisp white shirt and subconsciously licked his lips, the temptation to just pull over and jump in the back with him getting him riled up again.

No. This was all wrong.

_So_ wrong.

Glaring back at the road, he writhed in his seat in a sexually frustrated silence, as he forced his mind to think of something else.

Chess, football, laundry…Underwear…

His eyes fixated back on the mirror.

'_Fuck this isn't helping!'_

"What?" Ray bit out as he felt eyes on him and wrapped his arms around himself again.

Pressing his lips together Kai tore his gaze off him and snapped back to the road again in a huff.

"Nothing."

He was really starting to believe in this aphrodisiac shit because _surely_ this can't all just be the workings of that scrawny redhead.

Wouldn't be a huge surprise though if he was the sole culprit for _this _as he'd endured two hours of practical foreplay!

Locking with blue pools that shot a wink every time he'd dared to look straight ahead.

The sly shift of long legs underneath the dinner table, Tala's leather shoe caressing the inside of his calf.

Catching Kai's eyes flicker in the mirror Ray didn't really know what to do at first. He could see him fuming but with the mix of wine, feeling a little tired and having the promise of being 'ravaged' a smirk wound its way up the corner of his lips.

Getting himself more comfortable in the middle seat, spreading his legs where each knee was hidden behind the two front seats he reached and touched himself through the thick fabric of his pants.

Kai's eyes were glaring at the road in front of them before taking a quick glance into the mirror again then back to the road.

He did a double take.

Was he…?

Kai's eyes continued to dart from the road up to the mirror as he couldn't believe the sight happening right behind him.

The smirk on Ray's face only got bigger, pawing at his growing erection now that he had Kai's attention.

"Eyes on the road Mr. Hiwatari." He said before he let out a small moan and gripped himself harder.

Kai's mouth instantly dried up causing him to snap it closed and bring his gaze back down to the path ahead.

"Why are you fucking teasing me Ray?" He snapped with a little more fire than he actually intended.

"You love it." Ray panted softly back, "Just means you'll have to get us home quicker."

Kai let out a low growl. He didn't love it at all. In fact, Ray knew he _hated_ being teased. Though as predicted his foot began to slowly press down on the accelerator.

"Stop it Ray."

"You sure you want that?" Ray asked as he teased his zipper down and popping his button, slipping his hand inside his pants. "Thought you were going to ravage me?" He purred.

Oh… The way Ray was going he'd get a ravaging alright.

Wait no. They couldn't.

Kai's eyes continued to shift from the road to the reflection and noticeably sat more upright in his seat to get a lower angle to see where Ray's hand was slipping to.

"Oh fuck..." Ray moaned out as his hand worked against himself, writhing in the back seat as his legs parted more. He was going to get it tonight, one way or another.

Kai's lips slipped open again, the sound of Ray's moan causing his eyes to remain fixed on him.

Did he not realise how dangerous this was? Sure it was pretty late and not many people were on the road but he could barely keep his eyes on the path in front of them.

His crimson orbs were focused on the male behind, completely captivated as he reminded himself to keep taking quick glances at the roa- _Woah_! Trashcan!

Swerving back to the centre of the road Kai's heart skipped a beat, and with a gulp forced himself to concentrate on driving now.

No one would be getting anything tonight if they didn't make it home in one piece.

Ray bit back a giggle as he pulled his hand out his pants, getting them put back together while his heart tried to break free out of his chest.

That was a close one...

"What'd I say?" Ray asked in a sly voice as he slithered forward in the back seat, leaning up behind Kai's and getting at his neck. "Eyes. On. The. Road." He purred against his neck, kissing it gently.

Kai shivered at his touch on his neck now. His hand on the wheel becoming a little slack as his shoulder relaxed.

Two minutes and they'd be home. Just two more minutes.

Ray continued to kiss up and down Kai's neck, his hands coming around the seat and pawing at Kai's chest as he slipped his hands through his jacket.

"What're you going to do to me?" He asked in a lower purr than before.

Kai blinked before clearing his throat.

"W-What do you want me to do to you?" He asked, his eyes taking a quick glance down to the travelling hands before snapping back to the road.

One more minute

"I want you to _fuck_ me." Ray answered with a slight growl in the back of his throat, nipping at his neck again with his fangs. "Fuck me raw."

Kai's breath hitched in his throat as he let out an almost pathetic whimper.

He loved it when Ray talked dirty to him. Not knowing nor caring if it was really him or the wine at this stage but he'd be buying him another bottle tomorrow if this was how he acted with it.

With their house in sight now Kai put his foot to the floor as he swung it onto the driveway and slammed on the break, the car coming to an abrupt halt. Practically ripping off his seat belt off he then turned looking over his shoulder to Ray and bit out to him.

"Get in that house now."

Ray peeled himself off, getting out of the car and swayed his hips as he pulled his hair over his shoulder.

Flinging the door open Kai switched on the lights before turning to face him.

"You've thirty seconds to get up those stairs and if you're not naked by the time I get up there there's gonna be trouble."

"What if I want trouble?" Ray winked at him though started up the stairs anyways, it was too late to play these games and after his little stint in the car he was desperate to get off.

Making sure the front door was locked, Kai quickly checked his phone ignoring whatever the redhead had felt like saying to him and bounded up the stairs after Ray practically kicking the bedroom door open.

Ray would have leapt out of his skin if he wasn't expecting him, sprawled out on their bed naked like he had been ordered to do with his hair laying around him while he sat propped up on his side.

Kai's eyes drank up the sight before him, a smirk dancing on his lips as he'd done as he'd commanded.

"Aren't you an obedient little kitten?" He purred out as he started to unbutton his white shirt.

"Only for you." Ray winked at him again, his heart leaping in his throat again.

Peeling off his shirt, his chiselled physique in full glory Kai sauntered to the edge of the bed and sent him a smirk gesturing to his trousers.

"Wanna help me out?"

Licking his lips Ray quickly crawled to the edge of the bed, his fingers making quick work of the belt and Kai's pants to get at what he wanted. Practically salivating as he pulled Kai's cock loose from his pants and boxers.

"I've missed this so much." He practically whined before straightening himself up and pecking Kai on his lips where a weird blend of taste and smell hit him that he couldn't quite place.

Kai tensed slightly noticing the brief shift in Ray's expression as he pulled away from his lips. He must be sobering up if his sense of taste and smell was back to its usual heightened state.

Not to be suggestive he quickly licked his lips to try and rid any lingering evidence before he gestured down to his throbbing cock.

"You, were saying?"

Ray brushed it all off with a smile and let Kai step out of his pants.

Probably the oysters.

Bending down and putting his cock in his mouth quickly, the hardened flesh in his hands twitching and pulsing already while his own did the same between his legs.

Kai let a moan escape him now that _someone's_ mouth was finally on him.

God he was going to give him the best fuck of his life tonight.

Not an ounce of confliction within him, his only concern now was to cum.

With a hand making its way into Ray's loose locks Kai's free hand ran through his own.

"Mm right there baby.."

With the praise Ray took him in whole again, working his tongue in all the right ways and sucking with as much vigour as he could before the ache started to settle in. Not giving a damn about it he pushed through the strain, the head of Kai's cock hitting the back of his throat again and he let out his own muffled moan around his mouthful.

Reaching into their stash drawer Kai grabbed a bottle of lube before taking Ray's hand that had rested itself on his hip. Squirting some on to Ray's finger he chucked the bottle carelessly onto the bed before panting out his next order.

"Get yourself ready."

Obeying the commands like the 'obedient kitten' he was, Ray released Kai's cock from the confines of his mouth and fell back against the bed. Putting his feet down on the top of the sheets, spreading his legs wide as his hips lifted while reaching around and underneath himself. The full on frontal giving Kai a show as his coated finger sunk into his body and he let out another moan instantly.

Working himself until he was panting, his wrist cramping on him as sweat formed on his brow and his own cock now throbbing painfully from being ignored.

"Fuck me." He growled out in a pant.

The knot in Kai's gut became too tight to even bare as he watched the show before him with an almost dumb expression.

Seeing Ray like this, so submissive, it was like all his Christmas's had come at once.

Not even bothering to coat himself further with lube, deeming Ray's saliva enough, Kai pulled out the hand Ray had in himself, flinging it off to the side before taking a hold of his own cock and slowly easing it into his ass. The tight feeling overwhelming him more so than normal as he pushed all the way in to the base.

Ray's head went back as he willed his body not to clench or resist the intrusion, getting his arms around Kai's shoulders and his legs bent back to give more room.

"Oh god..." He panted through the slight sting and stretch, half forgetting what it even felt like to have Kai inside him.

Kai's mind was fogged, not even sure who he was imagining right now underneath him.

Roughly reaching underneath one of Ray's thighs he propped him further back and started pounding into him. His animalistic side completely engaged as he growled out his next demand.

"Say my name."

Ray's mouth gaped, hardly any sound coming out as the thrusting started up and the sting turned to full blown burn that began to fade to pleasure. He might not have had enough lube for this, but he didn't dare ask to stop.

As his body jerked with another hard thrust his chest rose off the bed, his nails digging down Kai's back and a perfect moan flew out of his parted lips with his panting.

"K-Kai! Ri-right there!"

Kai's free hand gripped onto the bedsheets taking a fistful.

"Fuck!"

He'd forgotten how tight Ray was, the pleasure was becoming almost ridiculously overwhelming for him now.

Hearing his moans, seeing him sweat. That long dark hair that he loved so much sprawled out all around him.

The stint in the bathroom… The stint in the car… It was all started to flood his mind, the wave of his climax dangerously close!

No, they'd been at it a few minutes at best. He needed to distract himself.

Quick! Think of something else!

**Think!**

'Ah, _fucking_ _hell_ _Kai.'_

Tala's husky moans and praises drowned his mind causing his teeth to instantly clench.

No. Anything but!

"Ta-aahhh!"

Ray blinked and stared at their ceiling as Kai's body fell limp down on top of his after his orgasm.

The hell just happened...?

"The fuck?!" He spat out, pulling at his bangs that were sticking to his face.

"Get off, I want a shower." He huffed, pushing Kai off his body and getting out from under him until something kind of clicked.

'_Ta-aahhh!'_

Out of all the words, moans and sounds Kai had ever made before, that one was new...

He gave him one last disbelieving look before he went to the top drawer in the dresser, fishing something out to get him off. That was the plan, get in and get out and try to forget about this fucked up night.

With heavy pants Kai had winced slightly when he was abruptly pushed out of him, his cock still throbbing somewhat as he came down from his high.

Rolling onto his back his eyes fluttered as he slowly came round, not even taking much notice of whatever Ray had grabbed and when he'd even left the room.

Staring up at the ceiling he too then became aware of the disappointing performance that he had just given.

Shit..

But.. that's what he got for teasing him in the car! He knew he hated being teased! Was barely his fault!

Easing himself up he bent down to his discarded trousers that were left in a pile on the floor. With the sound of the shower running he deemed it safe to take out his phone and check what 'T' had actually sent him all of fifteen minutes ago.

[T: Let me know when I can arrange an 'important meeting' with u Mr Hiwatari.. Or should I say Mr Aphrodisiac?]


	17. And How Does That Make You Feel?

Chapter 17 – And how does that make you feel?

With light knock on his office door Kai broke off his gaze from the computer screen in front of him and looked over his shoulder to see Ray easing himself into the room with his hands wrapped around a fresh mug of coffee.

After last night's ordeal he wasn't expecting those golden eyes to ever look at him again, so for Ray to approach him like this with a clear olive branch clutched between his tanned fingers it would appear he wasn't that mad with him after all.

"Morning.. You been up long?" Ray asked with a small smile, pushing the first empty mug Kai had made himself this morning out of the way and placed the fresh cup down on the desk.

Kai shrugged some, a little sheepish.

"Maybe around an hour or something?"

Ray rest his arms on Kai's shoulders as he stood behind his desk chair and leant over to hug him from behind, both of their cheeks touching as he peered at what he was doing on the computer.

He could never understand what was going on half the time on the screen when Kai was working so didn't even attempt to try anymore but he just wanted to be around him right now.

He felt like he'd been just a little over dramatic last night going off to shower in a huff. The wine having definitely exacerbated his disappointment; he really didn't mean to storm off like that.

Though he was sure Kai hadn't really taken it to heart as he was passed out, sound asleep by the time he got back to the bedroom.

When he was alone in the shower with his thoughts, the warm water sobering him up some, Ray figured that since it _had _been a while for the two of them, it was only natural that Kai had lost some of his stamina.

In his defence, there was bound to be a few hiccups along the way of them rekindling and getting back to normal; Being a guy, that was just unfortunately one of them. It wasn't _that_ big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.

Kai reached over and lifted the coffee Ray had brought him up to his lips, giving a soft '_thanks'_ on the ceramic rim as he took a small sip and leant back into his touch a little.

This was nice.

The closeness.

The warmth of Ray's chest against his back and how safe he felt wrapped in his arms right now in the comfortable silence..

How-

"-Can we talk?" Ray then softly asked.

_Fuck._

Taking another sip of his coffee Kai gave him a small nod before clearing his throat and placing the cup back down on to his desk.

He should've known this was coming; and it was the least he could do he guessed. Though, he wasn't really sure what to even say to Ray right now.

He felt awkward as hell over last night's events. Embarrassed even.

Not just at his shocking performance.

All of it.

The whole dinner, the sexually frustrated drive home, the horny race up the stairs and then one pathetic fireworks display.

God he'd pay anything to just erase the past 24 hours. Every cent he owned for every second.

_Especially_ all that with Tala.

How could he have let himself fall into that trap _again?_

He was beginning to sound like a broken record, so much so he was even starting to piss himself off with it all.

Saying he was done but then the second he locked with those icy blues losing all of his restraint.

He loved Ray. Adored him in fact, and with him wrapped round him now it almost felt like they were back to how they were a few months back.

Before they'd started to grow distant, before he'd left for China and before _he_ had royally fucked up with the damn landscaper.

He was done. For real this time. So much so he'd deleted Tala's number, _again,_ this morning when he'd woken up and had started to research vacation spots on the computer.

Maybe some alone time, just for the two of them would help mend this mess between them?

Ray then started to speak but paused for a moment almost like his memory had just been jogged and sent Kai a look.

"So, - Wait, didn't you say you had some meeting this morning?"

Kai's lips parted to respond before slowly coming to a close when he remembered he did in fact say that at the dinner table last night. He didn't think Ray would have remembered that though considering how drunk he was.

"Yeahhh, about that.."

Ray straightened himself up, retracting his arms back and placed his hands on his hips, an unimpressed expression sitting on his face as he looked down at him.

"So you lied... We just _rudely_ up and left the date for no reason at all.. I fucking knew it."

Kai rubbed a hand down his face.

"I already told you Ray that I didn't want to go in the first place.. You know I hate new people, and putting on a show. I do enough of it at work, I'd had enough of all the pleasantries and just wanted to leave."

Ray tutted.

"You were barely even at the table Kai, you ate half your food then high tailed it with.. with.." He stuttered as he tried to recall what that guy's god forsaken name was.

Why the hell was it so hard to remember?

"Fuckin' Todd or Troy or, whatever his damn name is."

Kai took in a breath to steady his heart some as the mention of all this again was making him feel uneasy.

"I didn't stay with him." He blurted out at the accusation before quickly thinking on the spot. "I just, showed him where the bathroom was, and then I stepped outside for some air...I needed a breather, that's it. Hell knows why _he_ took so long to reappear.. Wasn't anything to do with me."

Ray cocked a dark brow.

"For half an hour?" He asked, clearly unconvinced. "You were just stood outside the entire time?"

"Yes Ray." Kai stated in a firm tone though his nerves were starting to show now.

It was clear Ray wasn't believing any of the tale he'd just pulled out of his ass as half an hour just stood outside a restaurant was a little long even for an infamous brooder such as himself.

Golden eyes then narrowed.

He could think of _one_ reason why anyone would be stood outside for a length of time.. and it would also explain why he found that cigarette butt in the garden back when he'd returned from China.

"Do you smoke Kai?" Ray then quickly asked in an accusatory tone.

Kai sent him a frown as if to suggest he'd asked the most ridiculous question in the world.

That was random but it was an easy question to answer at least.

"No Ray, I don't." Those words coming out of him the most confident since this whole conversation started.

Kai then spoke to him a little softer, something within him deciding on giving him some truth to this story.

"Ok look, we _may_ have spoken a little bit too. Just about, general shit, I don't know.. But then he went in one door and I went out another." He reeled off, hoping Ray would just drop this.

Ray gave him a small nod as he accepted his answer. Though, more of the puzzle would have been solved if Kai had just admitted to the smoking.

He didn't say barely two words to the redhead whilst they were all sat at the table together so how could the conversation have suddenly flowed out of the pair of them the second they stepped up from it.

Odd..

"Well, regardless, we need to talk about us Kai." Ray started again, brushing off the whole topic of the worst double date in history. The only couple who mattered right now were them.

"Come on, you can work later, let's just concentrate on us for a second."

Turning him around in his chair, Kai's back now to the computer, Ray held out his hand to him and after a moment Kai took it.

Ray was right, they needed to focus all their energy on them right now. They needed to clear the air.

Easing up from his chair he followed behind Ray who led him out of the office, all the way down the stairs, through their living room and out into their backyard through the French doors.

Even though Summer was slowly coming to an end, it was still a fairly warm morning and the two of them walked out barefoot over the grass to the swing bench hanging from a wooden canopy in the far left by the water fountain.

Ray kicked his feet some, getting the bench going slowly once they'd both sat down, hands clasped over his lap, shoulder to shoulder with Kai as he stared ahead at the water slowly falling around the rim of the fountain.

In a way, the whole scene was rather soothing. Peaceful even. A stark contrast to their lives currently.

Yet through everything going on in his head, what he could say, what he couldn't say. Things he should have said and the things he shouldn't have said. The quiet was better, for now, just for the extra bit of peace.

No matter which way they looked, this wasn't going to be easy. It was just a matter of how stubborn they both were to keep hold of what little of their relationship they had now.

Carefully, Ray lowered his head onto Kai's shoulder. Keeping the slow momentum of the swing going as he kicked his feet and took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

The moment Ray's head relaxed onto his shoulder Kai tilted his own head and nestled his cheek into soft black locks. He knew Ray had brought him out here to talk but it was clear the both of them were just enjoying being in each others company right now. It had been a while to say the least that the two had just been like this.

No one else, no books, no phones, no distractions - just them.

"What do you have to do tomorrow?" Ray finally asked, breaking the silence between them.

As much as he enjoyed it, making plans and getting their feet moving forward with one another seemed like the best step possible at this point.

They didn't need to be in each others space 24/7, but it needed to be more than what they currently had or had been doing.

"Not a great deal." Kai answered after a moments thought. "I'll have to swing by the office at some point to check on things from the weekend but apart from that, nothing. You have something in mind?"

He stroked his thumb over Ray's hand as he gazed down at it currently entwined with his.

Ray shrugged a little, he really didn't have anything in mind per se, but anything was better than nothing.

"Can we be lazy sacks of shit when you get back? Order take out or something and just watch movies and TV? I really have nothing else planned tomorrow myself, just need to clean the house a bit."

A small smile crept on Kai's face.

He couldn't remember the last time he'd just lounged around the house like a 'lazy sack of shit' as Ray had described. It wasn't usually something he did, always needing to be doing something to occupy himself with, though once in a while he didn't mind it.

"Fine by me. I can pick something up on my way home." He suggested, before his smile fell a little.

He was surprised Ray was even wanting to spend the day with him. It had been so long and after everything that's happened between them.. would it just be weird? What would they even talk about?

"Sounds good. Surprise me though, get whatever you want." Ray said in a slightly perkier voice than before.

For now it seemed like a weight was coming off his shoulders and his chest, even if this was just one minor step it was still a step.

Kai just nodded before his gaze lifted up from their hands to the entirety of the garden.

This fucking yard.. Where it all started.

Kai hadn't actually spent any time in it since it got completed several weeks ago as he just associated the whole thing with Tala. He couldn't look at that section of grass without envisioning him digging there once, or that corner of stones without remembering him lifting them all up, his shirt riding up with it and arranging them to match the designs he'd drawn with skilled hands.

As peaceful as the whole scenery was, it was an odd feeling being sat out here, and gave him a slight bitter taste.

With Kai going quiet beside him, Ray followed suit. Picking up the speed in which they were rocking, letting his legs and feet kick out harder before pulling them back in.

"Ya know, at least Timothy did a decent job out here." He said a bit mindlessly, the bench near enough rocking with how hard he had them swinging now.

Kai just hummed in agreement, the grip on Ray's hand subconsciously tightening. He'd never given it much thought before but he was pretty thankful that the redhead's actual name hadn't once technically passed Ray's lips. Unlike the many times it had come out of his..

He was quite envious of the male beside him in all honesty. If only he could as easily forget a name.

"Let's.. go back inside shall we? Kinda cold.." He lied, setting his feet down on the grass to stop the rocking and eased himself up from the bench, his hand still holding on to Ray's.

"Okay." Ray blinked a little though got up to follow.

Not letting Kai's hand go as they made it back into the house, he paused in the doorway and took a final look back outside as he worried his bottom lip between his teeth.

"Hey so... I actually saw a cigarette butt out there a bit ago. If you smoke Kai that's fine, just, be honest with me about it. Okay?"

Kai looked over his shoulder back to him, his brows furrowed some. This again?

"I don't smoke Ray, how many times?" He sighed out a little in frustration. "If I did, don't you think I'd-" His voice trailed off like someone had just switched off the light in his head.

Ray blinked again, watching and waiting to see if the lights would kick back on in Kai's head though realized nobody was home now.

"..You'd tell me.. I know.." He guessed that was where Kai was going with his sentence. "Probably just blew in from somewhere then. It's fine. Sorry I keep asking." He quickly waved off with a small, almost, nervous chuckle.

"Want anything to drink?" He then asked in a weird tone, tugging Kai's hand a little as he stepped for the kitchen.

Kai swallowed, his throat _had_ gone a little dry.

"Uhm.. sure.." He replied once his system had been rebooted and let Ray lead him into the kitchen.

Letting go of his hand, Ray head over to make some tea as Kai lent against one of the counters and loosely folded his arms over his chest with his gaze low.

The damn cigarette.

Now it made sense why Ray kept going on about it. He knew exactly where it'd come from, watched the very action in fact but didn't think anything of it as those fair fingers had flicked it out without a care the morning after.

No matter how much he tried to erase all memory of him, Tala still managed to find some way to stick around. How was he meant to forget and pretend it never happened when some dark force kept trying to fuck with him like this!

"So, we talked about tomorrow. But what do we want for dinner tonight?" Ray asked as he threw open their fridge door.

The whole thing was stocked but he didn't have a clue on what to eat, or even if he actually wanted to eat anything.

Kai's gaze lifted up from the floor to the head of dark hair peering in the fridge, the sound of the door opening in front of him catching his attention. Did Ray say something? He presumed it had something to do with food.

He automatically shrugged a shoulder though with Ray's back to him it went unseen, so reiterated it with an almost childlike 'I dunno' hum in his throat.

Ray let out a breath, neither did he dammit. Could they do take out twice? Was that okay? Hadn't done that before, but if he couldn't think of anything to make then that was the better option than starving.

"Figure it out later." He shrugged and shut the door, heading back to the stove and the kettle for their tea.

Kai shifted some though remained in his spot against the counter. _God_ this was awkward.

Why was it so awkward between them?! Did Ray feel the same or was it just him?

He didn't even know what to say to Ray anymore. Not that he was a huge conversationalist but he usually had some words to utter at least.

With the water boiled Ray poured the tea and handed one of the cups to Kai who took it and sent him a half smile before just looking down into it, his expression seeming down, lost even.

Holding his own cup, Ray just stood there in front of him. Kai didn't even seem to realize that he hadn't moved or that he was even looking at him still.

Again, his head was racing with thousands of things to say while also things he shouldn't say.

They both had a hand to play in their downfall here, his more than Kai's at this point, which meant it was more of his mess to clean up than it was Kai's.

"I'm sorry."

Once again Kai's thoughts had wandered. Whilst he was here in person, seemingly very calm and tranquil, his mind was racing, and his senses muted.

What could he do to fix this? Could Ray do anything to fix this? Hell, _could_ they even fix this?

He'd been looking up vacation spots on the computer this morning, but what good was a change of scenery if the atmosphere between them would still be the same?

He looked up, his vacant crimson eyes locking with gold before he blinked, the life coming back to them.

"Hn?"

"I'm sorry. I know I keep saying it, and at this point I'm sure it doesn't even mean anything.. But I do mean it Kai." Ray answered without missing a beat, body so stiff he was sure if Kai tapped him he'd fall over like a tree.

"Sorry for what?" Kai asked almost dumbly, though once the words had passed his lips he realised what Ray was referring to. "Oh.. that.." he mumbled out as he continued.

He knew he was sorry. Knew that he was desperately trying to fix this between them but like him it would seem Ray didn't know what to do either.

"The only one who should be apologising is me.."

Ray arched a brow at him, mind working overtime to figure out what Kai had to really apologize for here at this point in time.

Yeah, he hurt him, scared him even, but in the end it hadn't been that grave of an offense. Not like the one he had committed.

"Got an idea. Tell me what you think, okay?" He started, perking back up slightly.

"No more apologies, for either of us. We can either move forward or keep moving back, so if we want to move forward then that's what we need to do. How, I'm not sure yet. But I was thinking, why don't we try therapy? If that's something you're comfortable with doing.."

Kai made a face at the word.

Therapy? Really? He'd already had his fair share of counsellors, shrinks and therapists growing up.

Did he _really_ want to step foot into another one of those _beige_ rooms where some random analysed his every word? Tried to figure him out? Tried to figure _them_ out?

It was no one's business what went on between them, but maybe Ray was right..

Whilst Kai had always had an issue with admitting when things were less than perfect and that he was struggling with something, he was willing, for once in his life, to accept any help he could get with this.

Though..

"I don't know Ray.." he said with clear unease and shifted even more so when amber eyes seemed to dull a little in disappointment. ".. Do you think it'd help?"

"I don't know." Ray admitted, "But at this point what do we really have to lose?"

Kai broke off his gaze from him as he thought about it some more.

He had a point. They really didn't have anything to lose here.. Was just his pride getting in the way with this one.

Swallowing it down he sighed a little before speaking quickly now before he changed his mind.

"Right I'll leave it to you then to sort out. Just let me know when and where."

Ray graced him and his answer with a small smile and nod. Putting a hand on Kai's shoulder he lent up and pecked him on the cheek before taking himself out of the kitchen, still not sure what the hell to do beyond that but felt like this may be what they needed after all.

Kai sighed again once Ray had left the kitchen and rubbed his hands over his face.

After the last time he hired someone no way was he going to be in charge of this. Ray can choose the therapist and deem them appropriate or not. The ball was completely in his court now.

Let's just hope it works..

* * *

x-x-x

Turning off the engine Kai peered out the driver's side window at the tall stone building they'd parked up beside.

Well this was the place, no turning back now. Though he wasn't going to rush in having stalled for the entire morning already.

He couldn't decide what shirt to wear for starters, he then leisurely drank his black coffee, they obviously needed to get some gas too and they'd conveniently hit _every_ red light heading into town.. What a shame..

Unhooking his belt, Ray paused slightly when he caught Kai's hesitation and gave him what he hoped was an encouraging smile. It probably fell flat, but it was the meaning behind it; that they were both trying now.

"Ready?" It was a stupid question, why he felt the need to ask it he didn't even know, but the silence had been killing him since they woke up.

Kai gave him a nod though was far from ready. All the time in the world wouldn't have prepared him for what they were about to endure; what they were willingly subjecting themselves to. But it wasn't like he'd come up with any ideas of his own on how to resolve all of this.

Unclipping his own seatbelt the two of them eased themselves out the car before heading into the building through the glass doors.

"Least it smells good, right?" Ray chuckled lightly. The moment they had stepped inside they were hit with the smell of something fruity in the air, probably an air-freshener to help calm people down, though really it made him hungry.

Kai sent him a look before a small smile crept on his face. Weirdo..

"Good morning gentlemen do you have an appointment with us today?" A young blonde woman politely asked from behind the reception desk looking between the two of them.

"We do." Ray answered with a more on-point smile, "Hiwatari."

Tapping away on her keyboard to retrieve the appointment she too sent back her own smile once the computer had said yes.

"Take a seat gentlemen, help yourself to some refreshments." She then gestured over to the table in the far right of the room that had an array of teas, coffees and a jug of iced water with a few lemon slices floating in it.

"Thank you." Ray went off to get himself some water, planting himself down soon after beside Kai as they were subjected to listening to cheesy elevator music.

Kai bounced his leg some as they sat waiting in the reception.

He couldn't stand waiting. Just meant he had longer to be with his own thoughts and to potentially high tail it out of here.

He gazed around, becoming familiar with the surroundings.

This place seemed a whole lot more modern than any of the other establishments he'd been to of this nature.

Shiny marble flooring, abstract artwork on the walls.

Whoever this guy was he knew about interior design.

"Hiwatari?" Came a confident female voice from a door opposite.

Ray was up on his feet, small paper cup in one hand and with his free one had pat Kai on the knee to make sure he followed though still waited for him to actually get up.

Kai took in a breath before reluctantly easing himself to stand, a sigh escaping through his nose.

Let's get this over with then..

Once in the room, with it's own fruity and 'calming' smell, they were sat beside each other in separate chairs with the therapist across from them.

She was aged, late fifties or so, but smartly dressed and short grey to white hair. She could have easily been either of their grandmother, which finally made Ray's nerves seize up a little.

Was it too late to back out now?

The woman cleared her throat some, clipboard over her lap as she smiled kindly at the two clearly nervous men across from her.

"Hello, my name is Dr. Lange. Can I get your names just for record?" She asked politely with her pen at the ready.

"Ray."

"You're the one that set up this appointment, correct?" Lange cut over him.

"Yes ma'am." Ray's voice came out a little shaky, especially when she turned her eyes to Kai.

"Was this a joint effort, or have you been brought here against your will?" She questioned, though Ray couldn't tell if she was joking or being serious.

Whilst Kai's first thought was definitely the latter he wasn't sure if this was the place for any light humour. He didn't want Doc over here to assume anything negative of Ray like he was controlling and had dragged him here when he didn't want to.. Or that he was the only one who cared about this enough since he made the appointment or...

_God_ he'd been in here twenty seconds and he was already second guessing everything!

"It was a joint effort." Kai decided on, adopting his firm businessman facade. It wasn't a complete lie..

"Good." The doctor chirped as she scribbled some stuff down, "And what's your name?"

"Kai." He stated, before swallowing.

What was she writing down? It'd been forty-five seconds now and she'd already written a whole load of stuff on that damn clipboard. He pressed his lips together. This was going to be the longest hour of his life.

"So, tell me a bit about yourself Kai. What do you do for work?"

He blinked as he thought of how to word this without coming across as a complete ass.

He hated talking about what he did knowing there was a very fine line between being proud of one's achievements and arrogance. He often chose to down play it all with strangers, never wanting to give off the wrong impression and have people think he was just some rich snob.

"I uh, work for a manufacturing company." He threw out in a blasé tone, hoping she'd be satisfied with that answer.

"He actually owns the company." Ray chirped in, the small smile on his face beaming with pride before quickly falling off his face the second crimson eyes glared over at him.

"Oh? How do you like it?" The doctor inquired some more, unfazed by either response entirely.

Kai just shrugged.

"S'alright I guess... Busy.."

Why was she just focusing on him? What did this have to do with _them_?

Ray sipped at his water, eyes darting from the doctor to Kai every now and then. The same thoughts Kai had going through his own head, then again figured she was just trying to get to know them better so shrugged it all off for now.

"Do you do anything outside of work? For fun?" The doctor continued with her game of twenty questions, still solely fixated on Kai.

"Uhm." He racked his brain knowing of an answer to give but was once again worried of what impression it would send the woman behind the desk.

Sure. He likes to blow thousands on roulette and poker.. he's partial to a whiskey or nine..

"I go to the gym and read, some." He settled on.

"You look the kind to enjoy a good book every now and then." The doctor commented, jotting something else down quickly before locking eyes with her prey again.

"Given all this, from work to your hobbies, how often in a day would you say you have time for your partner?"

Kai instantly tensed.

So that's where she was going with all this.

He turned to look at Ray before looking back at the doctor and sighing out.

"Not enough clearly.."

Ray let out a small snort as he sipped his water again.

_Clearly_.

The doctor nodded, jotting something else down before turning to her next victim.

"And what about you, Ray? What do you do for work, your hobbies?"

"I work in a restaurant. Though sometimes my schedule gets tight depending on who has booked a special occasion or if we're short staffed. Can't really say I have many hobbies, too tired to have anything really. Most days off I just keep the house clean and watch TV when I can. Sometimes I'll stop and hit the gym, but haven't done that in months."

Her grey eyes narrowed a little as she jotted more notes down on her clipboard.

"Is it mainly yourself that does the household chores Ray would you say, or are they distributed fairly evenly between yourselves?"

"Depends. If he's not home then he can't really do them, so I just do what needs to be done. When he is home he helps as much as he can, but by then there's not a whole lot to do. And as much as I appreciate the help, I'd rather do it myself." He answered rather quickly, as if he had rehearsed that in his head before.

Kai shifted himself a little again in his seat at the conversation being a blatant dig at him though was been spoken like he wasn't there.

Whilst Ray had just obviously tried to defend him there, no, he didn't do much at all in the house in regards of chores, because as Ray had just said 'when he's home' insinuated he hardly was.

Maybe he could help a little more.. though, as Ray just said he'd rather do it himself.. but was he just saying that to save his ass with this woman who seemed to be glaring over at him now?

"So, given this bit of info already. It seems you two aren't really together a whole lot inside and outside the home." The doctor stated more than questioned, "I normally like to wait to get to the nitty and grittier parts. But how is your sex life looking?"

Ray about choked on his water that he had gone back to sipping. He had expected that, but not so soon!

Kai brought the hand that'd been sat on the arm rest up to his face, hiding behind it as much as he could.

Someone just kill him now.

He was _not_ going to go down this route of conversation with someone as old as his grandfather. The hell did she know about sex anyway! He internally shivered at the thought.

"It's fine." He blurted out, not meaning for there to be as much bite to his tone as there was.

"That's an understatement." Ray said around the rim of his cup once he had stopped hacking a lung on the water that had shot down there earlier.

The doctor looked rather intrigued now, so much that she shifted a little in her chair like she was sitting on the edge of her seat.

"It's been about two months since we've been intimate." Ray continued. "We tried a few nights ago but it wasn't like it normally is, which is understandable given how long it's been. But, before that, it's been pretty much non-existent between us.

'_And why's that Ray?'_

The words dipped in poison were on the tip of Kai's tongue though he bit down and swallowed them back down his throat.

They were meant to be moving forward here and throwing some remark out there like that was only going to send them two steps back.

By god it was tempting though..

He chose to stay silent. A mixture of annoyance and embarrassment mixing within him now and sat slumped in his chair, his fist rested on his cheek.

How could he just admit all that out loud to a complete stranger?!

"You keep saying between _us_. Are you in an open relationship?" The doctor asked with a clear confused expression on her aged and weathered face.

"No." Ray answered quickly, tracing the rim of the paper cup as he sat in his lap. "But.. I did sleep with my ex a few weeks ago." He admitted, clear shame and guilt in his tone as he focused on the carpet below his feet.

There it was.

Kai didn't know how to feel having heard it for a second time now.

He dared to glance over to Dr Lange who's eyes were already on him.

"I'm guessing that this is the main reason as to why you're both here today?"

"More or less." Ray answered with a half-hearted shrug, "Make it clear though, I didn't cheat because of the lack of intimacy between us."

"Then why did you cheat Ray?" She queried without hesitation, her pen hovering over her clipboard as her steel eyes locked on to him.

Even Kai turned his head completely to his left to watch. If he didn't feel like he was about to throw his guts up with nausea he'd love some popcorn right now.

Ray kept his focus on his cup despite the eyes on him, his grip tightening slightly as he thought about it. Thought about how and why it happened, why he let it happen.

He already said it wasn't because of the lack of intimacy between him and Kai, but maybe that was part of it.

Mariah had said she loved him, part of him felt that he would always love her too. He thought he had moved on, had tried to move on and wanted to stay where he was now more than anything.

So why?

"To be honest. I'm not even sure now. She was just... There." He finally answered without looking up.

"I see.." Was the plain response, neither her tone nor her expression giving anything away as she jotted something down, though didn't glance down at the paper, just kept her eyes focused on Ray.

"I'm sorry for asking this next question Kai," She continued, sending a look in his direction though like a robot there was no warmth to her apology at all. "I can appreciate how the answer may be upsetting however it's something I need to ask if we're hoping to move forward with this.. it's also important that you're completely honest with your response Ray...

Do you still have feelings for this ex of yours?"

Ray looked up with the familiar sting of tears in his eyes, keeping his focus on her more than Kai beside him even though all he wanted to do was look at him and apologize over and over to him for doing this to them.

"...I think I always will." He answered in a hard breath, "We grew up with one another, what we had was good for a long time until it was just mutually better to move on. I thought I had, I _want_ to, and if given the chance to go back, I know I wouldn't. So I don't... I don't really know why I did."

Even with the tears starting to trickle down Ray's tanned cheeks Kai's jaw had clenched and his breathing had become unsteady.

He then turned away from him sending Dr Lange a look before clearing his throat and standing up from his chair.

She was right, the answer was upsetting.

"Excuse me." Was all he said before walking out of the room.

Ray's grip on the cup in his hold tightened to the point the plastic began to crinkle between his hands, trying to fight back the shaking that started up in his arms and entire back as the door to the room closed.

What had he done?

With another deep breath Kai head towards the refreshments table and poured himself a cup of water before heading outside the glass entrance for some air, ignoring the blonde receptionist completely who had sent him a warm smile.

He wouldn't mind a cigarette right now actually.

Taking a glance down to his water he took a sip; or something stronger to drink.

He didn't know what to think with this anymore now. It's like they'd taken a step forward but was then launched three steps back with that.

Today was meant to fix them, or at least make a start towards that at least. But with him out here and Ray back in there practically declaring is undying love for Mariah what hope did they fucking have?

It seemed irreparable and Ray wasn't even aware about what _he'd_ done to them.

Imagine if he found out..

"Are you okay?" Lange asked as Ray wiped at his tears still running down his face.

Ray shook his head, he wasn't okay. They weren't okay. Why was love so _fucking_ difficult?!

"Just take a moment then. We can keep going, just you and me, or we can wait for Kai to return if you'd like." She offered in a gentle voice as the young man kept breaking down in front of her.

"Keep going." He answered through a broken voice, fighting with getting a hold of himself.

She nodded to him though with Ray's blurry gaze down low it was missed, before settling back into her chair.

"Very well.." she started, her pen resting over her clipboard. "Do you remember how Kai first reacted to the news of your infidelity?"

A small laugh came out of his throat as he nodded, "Was angry, upset and rightfully so. We haven't been the same since, but he didn't break up with me... Why I'm still not really sure, I would have if it were reversed. But, I'm happy he hasn't. That he's willing to try and work past this with me."

"How was he _exactly_ though, can you remember?" She pressed, looking directly at him and tilting her head a little.

"You said he was angry and upset, but try to explain that a little more to me.. Did he cry for instance? In regards of the anger did he lash out verbally or even physically? Help me paint a picture here because from what I've seen of your partner thus far he's quite.. guarded with his emotions shall we say. Think back again to the moment he found out."

Feeling like it was the only thing he could do right now, Ray just nodded back as he sat there and went back to that night.

"He didn't cry, he's, not really that way inclined.. He asked me 'what now?' and I didn't have an answer for him, how can you answer something like that? So he finally did yell at me, wanting to know what I wanted... But again, I just didn't have an answer for him." He shrugged his shoulders some before running a hand through his hair with a sigh.

"I told him what I've already said, that it just happened and I don't know why it had. But that I regret it, I really do and he asked why. Told him it was because I love him, he kind of scoffed and then turned his back to me. That night we slept apart, have been since a few nights ago but things are stuck right now. Like neither of us know where to step or how to keep moving forward."

"I see.." Lange's brows furrowed in thought as she wrote down a few notes on Kai's behaviour from the night in question. Whilst in all of her experience as a couple's therapist she'd indeed come across many reactions to infidelity, this one however was somewhat new.

To allow the guilty party to be in complete control of the situation afterwards, whilst it isn't completely unheard of, it usually only occurs in relationships of a volatile nature. Both physical and mental abuse present. She'd only been with these two for around half an hour or so but felt she could definitely rule any major toxicity out.

No, there was only one reason why the victim would relinquish control like this and that would be if the victim wasn't all that innocent themselves..

There was an almost timid knock on the door after Ray had fallen silent, and after Dr Lange called for them to come in two toned slate hair reappeared back into the room.

"Ah, thank you for coming back in Kai, take a seat, make yourself comfortable."

Turning over her sheet of paper she wrote down on the fresh side further notes on what Ray had just said to her before glancing back up to him.

"What I want to try now actually is allow Kai to have some one on one if that's okay with you Ray?"

"Of course." Ray said without hesitation, picking himself and his crinkled cup out of the chair and left with a small look back at Kai before disappearing out of the door.

Kai had kept his gaze low as Ray stood up to leave and once the door had come to a close dared to look up at the steel grey eyes that had fixed upon him now from across the desk.

Could he ask what they'd spoken about once he'd left? Did he even want to know?

He figured he'd just stay quiet until he was spoken to.

"How're you feeling?" Lange asked, knowing this was probably a little hard for both of them, but now her concern was on the young man who probably had his heart ripped out and torn to shreds.

He just shrugged his shoulders, almost childlike.

How was he supposed to feel right now? Whilst Ray had said during his confession to him several weeks ago that it hadn't meant anything, for him to now say he'll always have feelings for Mariah, it had to have meant _something_ right?

"Never better." He dully added.

"If you want to get anything off your chest, this is the time and place to do it." She encouraged.

There was more to this story she could tell. But she wasn't going to jump to conclusions based on an inkling.

Kai broke off from her gaze that remained locked on him.

Oh there was a whole bucket load he wouldn't mind getting off his chest but his lips stayed firmly pressed together.

He couldn't admit to anything he'd done out loud because he'd already convinced himself that what happened with Tala was done, it was in the past now and it didn't need to be brought back up again. That was a problem he'd dealt with himself and didn't need any help or, _therapy_, for.

None of what he did, none of _that_ was affecting their relationship because it was all just his dirty secret. Wasn't even a factor in any of this.

Wasn't like he was in love with guy, it all just happened and that was it. It was done.

"I'm good." He plainly replied with a small head shake.

"Well then..." Lange seemed to sigh as she sat back, "What would you like to talk about then? What're your plans in helping this relationship to move forward, if that's even something you want to do? How long have you two been together?"

Kai thought for a moment, back to when they'd decided to become 'official' at long last.

It was debatable as to when he and Ray had actually got together as the two had been going on dates and sleeping together for a good few months before admitting to being serious.

That conversation had happened one night when they'd just been out for dinner. Was that French restaurant actually just on the outskirts of town. Pierre had sat them in the quietest spot in the place at Kai's request and the two of them had spent all evening reminiscing, drinking wine and eating good food.

Once dessert came, a chocolate cheesecake shared between them, Kai had suddenly gone real quiet as he let Ray have the final bite.

Ray had noticed the shift in him and with the fork still in his mouth asked if everything was alright. Kai nodded and sent him a warm smile before starting with _'So I've been thinking..'_

"Going on three years?" He finally replied with a frown not being a hundred per cent sure. "As for plans on fixing it I don't know, that's why we're here.. All I know is that I can't imagine myself being with anyone else so don't want to just throw it all away."

"Well, that's a good start." She liked that answer, it seemed genuine. "Would you say he feels the same, despite what's happened?"

Kai felt a little torn with that one. He'd thought that originally considering all Ray had tried to do since it had come to light, but if he still felt he had some attachment to her then he didn't understand all the effort with him.

"Well doing this was his idea so.." He dared to glance up at grey eyes. "I guess he does?"

The doctor scribbled some more, looking over her notes and up at him again before back down to her notes.

"Then what are _your_ plans on fixing this?" She asked as she locked eyes with him.

A slate brow rose.

"Well I'm here too aren't I?"

"Yes, but that's just one step. One step that was also _his_ idea. So, what are _your_ plans?" The doctor stressed as she kept their gaze locked.

Kai pressed his lips together again and swallowed breaking the eye contact once more.

He was starting to dislike this lady's tone pressing for an answer he didn't have. He was just planning on going with the flow with all this. If he knew he was going to have to do all the work why was he paying her two hundred an hour?!

"Was sorta hoping you'd be assisting with that.."

"I can't do everything. Once you step foot out those doors, it's in your hands again." She said in a slightly amused voice, lacing her fingers over the top of her clipboard and sitting back into her chair.

"I know something like this isn't always easy to get over, sometimes people never do. So my next question is, do you forgive him for what he did?"

Kai took in a deep breath before releasing the sigh through his nose.

Did he forgive him...

Well he was still around wasn't he? That had to count for something..

"I.. don't know.." he paused for a moment, the internal struggle clear on his face as he thought about what they'd both done to each other.

"I can see he's trying to fix it but I don't know.. like you said it's not easy to get over something like this especially when you saw it coming."

Though Kai had said it with a clear bite, he hadn't seen it coming at all.

Sure he used to throw digs but he didn't think for one minute Ray would have really gone back there, back with _her_.

Was like he'd said to him though; she was there, and he wasn't.

Lange rose her own greying brow, "You knew this would happen?"

"Well.." he stuttered. "Had my suspicions I guess.. on him like a leech every opportunity she gets. Was only going to be a matter of time."

"Instead of the normal 'I told you so' type jabs, and taunting where it was hanging over his head about the possibility of it happening. Did you ever sit down and talk about it with him?" She asked in a soft tone.

Kai shifted himself in his seat, readjusting himself.

"I, wouldn't say we sat and talked about it as such but it wasn't exactly a secret her being in his life bothered me.. they've got history, so of course it's gonna bother me.. but he chose to keep her around anyway. Claimed they were '_just_ _friends'_." He said showing the emphasis with his two fingers. "She's always the first one he runs to whenever there's any sort of problem. Always goes and talks to her when there's something up.." his voice then trailed off.

He wasn't exactly the most emotionally available of people who could offer comfort and a shoulder to cry on so it made sense why Ray would go to someone else.

Maybe if it wasn't Mariah it would have just eventually been someone else anyway.. the way he often pushed him away.. he was bound to seek solace in the arms of another.

"Given their history, that's understandable. But as his partner, the first option should have been you, but given what I know so far. Your availability may have hindered him in doing so, correct?"

Kai just shrugged at her in a slight huff.

Just get it over with lady and place the whole blame on him already. It was obvious where she was going with this, though a flame flickered within him and he suddenly felt a sudden urge to fight his corner.

"Okay, _and? _You don't just go fuck someone else just 'cos your partner is _unavailable_. I work a lot, he works a lot, it's stressful for us both! But you don't see me jumping into bed with.." He paused for a second before quickly clearing his throat. ".. with someone just cos Ray's not around.."

Lange held her hands up, "That wasn't what I was saying, Kai. What I was getting at was that he's only human, who needs and wanted a source of familiar comfort. You weren't there, she was. Correct? Although it's caused a great rift between the two of you, it seems that rift has always been there and now it's only gotten bigger.

"Look at it this way. You both have been standing side by side, then this rift grows between you and it was never taken care of, now it's just separating you further and further. This right now is just a Band-Aid you're slapping over the cracks, it doesn't fix anything. If he is willing, then you need to meet him halfway in helping as well. He can't do all the work on his own, and although it may come from the guilt he feels right now, it can still be beneficial to your relationship as a whole. If you wish to continue with it."

Kai took a sip from the cup of water he still had in his hand though it was hardly comforting as it had warmed to room temperature now.

"Yeah.. I guess.." he agreed though still wasn't exactly sure what he could do in helping to fix this.

Just to simply be around more seemed to be the common solution but what good was being around each other if they couldn't so much as lock eyes without feeling like they were on a first date all over again.

Lange watched him for a little bit, his silence understandable but also grating. She couldn't give advice with someone who wouldn't so much as speak about their problems. He was a tough nut alright.. But she was determined to crack him.

"Should we bring Ray back in, or was there anything else you'd like to discuss beforehand?"

Kai glanced back up to her before clearing his throat again.

"No, bring him back in it's fine." He mumbled, preparing himself for the air to become even thicker than it was already.

"Very well." She sighed and went to the door.

A few moments later Ray was brought back in, new uncrinkled cup of tea in his hand as he sat himself back into his chair beside Kai's own. Cheeks a little tear stained but his eyes were clear finally.

Kai looked over to him as he sat in the seat beside him again and forced a half smile.

He strangely felt a little better now that Ray was back and it wasn't just him and doc over there.

He offered him his hand resting it on Ray's arm rest.

She'd said meet him half way right?

Ray glanced at it for a second, a little confused on why he would offer his hand right now but took it regardless.

But now what? What else were they supposed to do now?

"So for our final few minutes I want you to both say one thing that you love about each other, and one thing, that moving forward, you'd want them to change.. so basically something you dislike." Lange then spoke, breaking the silence that had fallen upon the room before gesturing over to the Chinese male on her right.

"Ray if you'd like to go first."

No, he wouldn't _like_ to go first, but since she threw him on the spot he might as well give it a shot.

He shifted in his seat, turning to face Kai head on while he kept their hands together and gave a small squeeze.

"I've always loved and admired how you can push past anything, how you're able to pick yourself back up and carry on like it was nothing. But I _hate_ how in doing so you push people away, push _me_ away."

Dr Lange sent him a smile before scribbling on the clipboard and turning to her left.

"Kai? One thing you love, one thing you dislike."

It was Kai's turn to shift in his seat though his gaze didn't remain on Ray, instead it dropped down low.

Just one? He loved everything about him. Whilst he was away in China it was then that Kai had truly noticed how much presence and warmth he brought into his life. Without him he was just a robot.

Wake up, work, home, bed.

It wasn't until Ray had come into his life did he even learn the meaning of the word love.

But damn his pride he couldn't just say all that out loud.. could he?

"I.. I love how.."

Ray's eyes remained on him, even leant forward a smidge as he watched the cogs start to turn in Kai's brain. He'd always known how hard it was for him to put his thoughts and feelings out there, but if he didn't know where his head was at how were they meant to resolve anything?

Kai then exhaled clearly a little frustrated.

Fuck it.

"I love most things about you Ray." He then turned to face him. "Just, everything about you.. How you're able to just.. make me, _feel_ things. If that makes sense?"

Ray gave him a small smile and a nod though stayed quiet hoping he was on a roll with this. He knew what he was referring to having known him since he was an emotionless jerk.

"I never even knew what love was before you showed me and now I couldn't imagine myself ever having what we have with anyone else.. you just.. complete me, I guess.. I don't know.. I had no idea how much was missing in my life until you came along and added to it."

"And one dislike?" Lange interrupted their moment, watching Ray visibly suck in a breath.

"Uhm.." Kai looked to the floor again before taking in his own breath and giving a shrug.

"Your hair always clogs up the drains.. pisses me off.." he looked back up to gold and gave a smirk.

"Sorry." Ray chuckled with a small smirk of his own, "Can always just hack it off if you want."

Kai's smirk fell from his face.

"That's not funny.."

Ray sent him a fanged grin before he even laughed out a little, glad to be ending this on a slight up. An hour ago it seemed like all hope was lost and they'd gotten a whole lot worse if that was even possible, but now, with a warm smile and softened crimson eyes staring back at him it seemed they were going to get through this.

Dr Lange had her own smile painted on her lips as she wrote down on a separate piece of paper some key points she wanted the two of them to work on before their next session.

After handing it over the desk, Ray took it from her and the two of them thanked her before standing up from their chairs and heading towards the door.

The sound of her voice again caused the two of them to pause and look over their shoulder.

"Kai, you can decline if you wish to, however I feel you would benefit a great deal from your own separate session with me if you'd be willing."

Kai looked to Ray who sent him a reassuring nod.

With him being the wronged party it made sense he'd need extra sessions, though he wouldn't push him, it was his choice.

"Uh sure.." He agreed though was clearly reluctant.

Flicking through her paper diary a few pages, Dr Lange pressed her index finger on a free morning she had in a few days.

"Thursday at ten?"

"Sounds good." Kai gave a nod.

"Perfect. See you then Kai."

Walking out hand in hand the two said their goodbyes to the receptionist out front before exiting through the glass doors, the warm breeze of late Summer refreshing them somewhat as they head towards the car.

"Well that was an experience." Ray chuckled out a little, hoping that Kai's mood wasn't going to drastically change with him now that they didn't have an audience.

"You sorta get used to it.. Don't know why I have to go back on my own though." Kai pouted some, like all that wasn't hard enough and he had Ray by his side throughout most of it.

"It makes sense though, you having more to deal with and all.." Ray's tone was low now. He didn't want to keep dwelling on this, but really hoped Kai kept the appointment if it meant them getting back to normal quicker.

Before unlocking the car crimson eyes locked on another building across the street. He hadn't realised what part of town they were in, the two of them not venturing out like this in a while now.

"Hey remember that little pizzeria?" Kai pointed out.

"Oh yeah! They did the best calzones." Ray remembered he'd ordered the pepperoni. Gosh they'd not been there in forever. The last time was probably one of their first outings together, just the two of them.

Kai's feet came to a slow stop before turning to face him.

"You hungry?"

Ray's heart fluttered some, the appetite he'd lost completely whilst in the therapist's room had come back to him with a vengeance.

"Sure am." He said with a smirk.

Releasing his hand Kai wrapped an arm around Ray's waist, pulled him in and with a quick tilt of his head gestured towards the pizza place.

"C'mon then, my treat."

Ray internally swooned and let Kai pull him towards the restaurant across the road.

As if there was ever any doubt that they could fix this.

Pizza definitely solves everything.

* * *

A/N: I'm so sorry for taking so long with this update.. Hit a major wall and just wasn't sure of my direction for a bit.

But thanks to Tsh for the therapy idea! Lord knows these boys need it xD You're a sweetheart thank you. And to Lux also for giving me my own therapy session with this damn chapter.

As always thank you to those that fave and review. I promise the next update won't take as long.

K~


	18. Bittersweet

Chapter 18 - Bittersweet

It was a usual morning in the Hiwatari/Kon household.

Kai being up and showered first even though he'd given himself the day off, and Ray sluggishly following in his footsteps as he got ready for a gruelling shift at the restaurant.

With the air being a lot clearer between the two of them after their first therapy session yesterday with Dr Lange which was followed by a cute pizza date afterwards, Ray had slept the heaviest he had in a long time. All uncertainty of their relationship slowly draining away with every bite of pepperoni and laugh into a glass of coke.

If it wasn't for the fair hand lightly shaking him awake this morning he'd be running late right now as his alarm clock hadn't even stirred him.

Whilst there seemed to be no obvious tension between them Ray couldn't help but feel something was _off_ between them still. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but Kai just seemed not really with it this morning. He'd even go as far to say he was a little, distant?

It was no secret the Russian wasn't a huge conversationalist, even less so before his morning coffee, but it'd been like talking to a wall since the two of them had got out of bed.

He could sense something was bothering him, obviously had _something_ on his mind, but whenever he asked 'what was up' Kai assured him it was nothing and he was fine.

They'd made progress yesterday hadn't they? Why didn't he just tell him what was wrong?

"Hey what time did you say you'd be home from work tonight?" Kai then asked from the kitchen as he made himself his first coffee and Ray tied his shoe laces out in the hall.

"6:30.. for the _third_ time.." Came the reminder as Ray straightened himself up and reached for his denim jacket on one of the coat hooks.

Why did he keep asking? And how many times did he have to tell him?!

Kai sent him a nod though it was more to himself as he leaned against the counter and took a sip of the heaven in his mug, engraining the time into his mind and going over all of his elaborate plans and tasks for the day that needed to be completed before said time.

Blitz the entire house; Do the dishes; Laundry; Pick up his suit from the dry cleaners; Stop by the grocery store to get all the ingredients for dinner tonight; Candles! Don't forget candles..

Get a hair cut; Stop by the florist on the way home; Start dinner; Shower; Change into suit; Cologne; WINE!

Pick up a bottle of wine from the grocery store too which was _before _the hair cut right?.. and candles! God he can't forget the bloody candles.. maybe he should write a list.. Ooh he did like a good list..

"Earth to Kaiiii?" Ray sung out waving his arm at him as he stood half way out the front door.

"Hn?!" Crimson eyes shot across his cup as he was brought back to the room and having noticed the door was open figured Ray was leaving for work now.

"Oh, have a good day at work babe." He said lifting his mug up to him.

Ray just tutted, shook his head at him and walked out the house closing the door shut behind him.

The sun was bright out though wasn't providing tanned skin with much warmth as Autumn was in full swing now.

He'd need to start wearing his thicker jacket soon and part of him wished he'd grabbed it just now but he knew as soon as he got to work and the lunch time rush was under way he'd be sweating buckets in that kitchen.

He sighed through his nose a little.

Whilst Ray enjoyed his strolls to work as they gave him time to ponder, his overthinking wasn't always welcomed.

They had promised each other they were both going to be more open and honest moving forward, so what was the deal with this?

Maybe Kai just needed a little more time...

He was due for his own personal therapy session tomorrow with Dr Lange so maybe she could get what was wrong out of him.

She got more out of _him _than what he'd anticipated on sharing that day that was for sure.

Whilst the whole reason they were there was because of what he'd done with Mariah, and he knew it was more than likely going to get brought up at some point, having to admit to his feelings in front of Kai was something he hadn't really wanted to do or had expected for that matter.

He'd like to say he hadn't given the girl a second thought since he got back, but it had been hard not to when she was trying to call and text him every other hour of the day.

Was she just trying to cause trouble again? Couldn't she take a damn hint?

He felt shady as hell having to keep his phone on silent all the time so had to just block her in the end. Growing tired of the _'Please call me back. We really need to talk'_ messages.

No, they didn't need to talk at all! What else did they really have to say to each other?

That bridge had royally been burnt now, there was no going back after what they'd done. There was no grounds for salvation of _any _relationship... not even friendship.

He took a glance at his phone to check the time, his feet in turn starting to walk quicker as he'd slowed his pace with his mind wandering.

All that mattered now was him and Kai. He just wished he knew what the problem was now..

The second the front door had closed Kai turned to the sink behind him and flicked on the tap.

He'd start with the dishes, and then clean round the living room. Get all downstairs sorted and tidied first and then up.

He took a glance to his Rolex.

10am.

Loads of time.

He'd already part set up the dining room knowing Ray usually never went in there and had Tiffany pre-order a nice bouquet as he didn't know shit about flowers.

The itinerary was in place, he just had to make sure he kept an eye on the time and didn't get side tracked with anything.

Mission 'Perfect night in' is a go!

* * *

x-x-x

The lunch time rush was slowly but surely coming to an end, Ray having been whisked off his feet the moment he'd walked in this morning as his sous chef Marie had been sent home due not feeling so good.

Wiping his forehead with his arm he took in a deep inhale to catch his breath as he stood at the stove preparing one of the final orders of food that was due to go out a few minutes ago.

"Hey Ray, there's a girl out front asking to see you."

The restaurant's head waiter Carlos picked up and balanced three plates of food from the counter on his arm as he spoke across to him.

"I told her we're really busy and if it could wait 'til you get off at five thirty but she said it was urgent." He added with as much of a shrug as he could give without tilting the plates too much.

Ray cocked a brow as his head lifted from the steaming wok he was currently stood over and stirring the contents of.

A girl? What was Hilary doing here? Ugh he _really_ didn't need whatever this was right now. He was multi-tasking here as it was.

"Just, give me a second.." His voice then trailed off, focus going on another pan now as he reached over for a plate from the stacked pile behind him.

"Is she out front? Tell her to go round the side out back."

Carlos sent him a nod before taking his leave from the kitchen, pushing on the swing door with his back, dark brown eyes then locking with golden ones as he turned back around and approached the girl again whilst sill balancing the plates on his arm to be served to customers.

Mariah shifted in her oversized white hoodie, taking a glance around at the overwhelming amount of people currently sitting in the restaurant. Members of staff dashing back and forth in front of her making her feel both out of place and just generally in the way.

"He said he won't be long." Carlos informed her before quickly explaining further. "You need to wait out back for him though, he won't be able to talk to you out here. Go out to the left and through the metal gate, there's a small courtyard, wait in there."

Mariah silently nodded to him though it was missed as he'd already dashed off to serve the dishes of food to customers.

She hadn't wanted to do it this way. Not that she'd wanted to do any of this at all, but since she couldn't get a hold of him on his phone or through any of his social media she'd had no other choice but to book a flight from China and come all the way over here.

Making her way down the dingy cobbled alleyway she followed Carlos's directions and head round the back of the restaurant.

Hesitantly pushing open the metal gate with an eerie creak she stood in the small courtyard and took in her surroundings.

There was a white wooden door that looked like it was due another coat of paint wide open, and with the smell of food and sounds of voices calling out orders pouring out of it she could only presume this led to the kitchen.

She waited for what felt like an eternity, a wave of nausea coursing through her every time she heard Ray's voice talking with the other members of staff.

Laughing and joking..

It had been weeks since she'd so much as even cracked a smile and whilst she didn't want to be the intentional cause of any more of Ray's heartache this wasn't just her pain to bear anymore.

Eventually gold met gold as Ray came to step out of the doorway, his heart sinking instantly the second he processed who 'the girl' was and stood there frozen in place.

Everything around him lost all traces of sound, smell, and even his vision began to constrict; the world under his feet feeling as it were tilting beneath him.

What the hell was she dong here?! Everything was slowly building back up with Kai and if he knew she was here it would surely set them right back to square one!

"Mariah.." He managed to say, though his throat had completely dried up.

"I need to talk to you Ray.."

Whilst her broken tone lacked urgency it drowned in grave solemnity.

Shifting where she stood she willed her feet to walk, gingerly shuffling closer to him where she felt safe.

She just wanted him to hold her, tell her that everything was going to be alright but seeing that Ray had instantly retreated from her, taking a step back, she knew that wasn't going to happen.

"Ray.."

"What do you want Mariah?" He cut off in a low growl, avoiding looking at her completely.

Part of why he couldn't bring himself to even take a glimpse of her was due to his own guilt. He'd never felt like such scum remembering how he'd just cast her aside like used goods the second he'd cum inside her.

"_Just get out." Ray snapped as he sat himself up, pulling himself around and finding his pants on the floor._

"_What, why?!" She shrieked at him as she jumped to her hands and knees behind him._

"_Just go..." He said as he climbed off the bed, snatching up his pants and taking them to the bathroom without looking back at her._

_Mariah stared and gaped as the bathroom door closed, the anger and rage building back within her as she jumped off the bed and snatched up her clothes._

"_You are something else Ray!" She spouted as she hooked her arms through her bra straps, "You just wanted to go and get your dick wet; I see how it is!" She snapped loudly._

He'd then taken off the next morning without a trace, getting on the first bus to the airport and catching the next available flight back to Japan.

Mariah deserved _something _for all that she'd done, but no one deserved that kind of treatment. He wasn't raised to treat anyone like that.

"Just.. spit it out, I have to get back to work." He pressed.

Mariah braced herself.

She wasn't sure what made her take her next actions, perhaps the fact he was still refusing to look at her, but she stepped to him anyway, took a hold of his face with both her hands and pressed her lips against his.

All that she'd said to him whilst they were in China she'd meant every word. All of it. And everything she'd said to him during all the years they'd spent together before that.

She loved him, always had loved him, and always will.

Love makes you do stupid things, and she had plenty of regrets but loving him would never be one of them.

Ray stood frozen, both time and his heart stopping.

At the pressure on his lips his eyes automatically fell closed for a second before he pushed her off of him in a flash.

"Have you lost your fucking mind?!" He spat, the back of his hand coming up to quickly wipe his mouth, his eyes now slitting, running up and down her person in disgust.

Whilst he may have admitted to Dr Lange he'd always have feelings for her he never specified _what_ feelings. Turns out, in this moment, with his chest heaving and his eyes locked on her now, that feeling was pure hate.

His upper lip curled back, almost like a snarl, wanting to turn and just leave her there without a word; She didn't deserve words after that!

Mariah had caught her balance fine from the shove back, though stared back at him now with watery eyes.

She'd seen that look before during the many years she'd known him, but it was never aimed at her. He'd never looked at her like that; Like she was the absolute scum of the Earth.

She instantly broke off her gaze from his, feeling awfully uncomfortable now.

She knew what she did was wrong. She shouldn't have deleted Kai's text messages, shouldn't have hidden Ray's phone, and she shouldn't have kissed him just now.

She knew all of this but all she ever wanted was him! Couldn't he see that?! The entire time they were in China together she had thought he'd felt the same!

All the day's they'd spent together, and then that night when they'd crossed back over that line again made her feel that everything was solidified.

But that wasn't the case clearly. Like she'd said to him he was just wanting to get his rocks off.

"I'm.. I'm sorry I just-"

She dared to take another glance up at him, only to see his back was facing her now and was heading back through the door into the kitchen.

"Ray, wait! Please!" Her voice cracked as she whimpered out.

Like nails raking on a chalk board, his ears burned at hearing his name come out that poisonous mouth of hers again. His back tensing as his blood boiled.

"Leave me alone." He bit out in warning, not even bothering to turn back and face her.

He didn't care what she had to say now. He wasn't going to fall for her tricks again. Wasn't going to fall for her lies.

"B-But Ray.." Mariah stuttered as the genuine tears began to slip down her tanned cheeks.

Did the fact she'd come all the way over here mean nothing to him?

Whilst she accepted her wrongs, it takes two to tango and Ray had to accept his responsibilities also.

"Why are you doing this Ray?! Why are you trying to completely ignore me?!" She bit out in her frustration.

Ray's brows furrowed together, he had half a mind to just keep walking and leave her standing there like he had originally planned, while another part forced him to step up to her.

It was now or never that he had to draw the line he should have made a long time ago, make it clear to her that what happened would never happen again and that whatever she felt for him, whatever he felt for her, needed to be squashed out in the here and now.

"You really have to ask that? You really couldn't take the hint and just leave me be?" He hissed out low in her face, "I have been trying to clean up the mess I made of my relationship with the man I _love_, so excuse me if I didn't have time to entertain snakes like you." He sneered.

Mariah took a slight step back as his face neared hers, his words dripping in poison.

She'd be lying if she said the tone he'd just used wasn't scaring her somewhat right now. She'd always felt protected beside him before, but now.. She was starting to regret even coming here but why should she be the only one being left with sleepless nights whilst he's all snuggled up with the 'man he loves'?

"If you loved him so much Ray you wouldn't have done what you did with me so easily!" She spat in retaliation, the tears continuing to stream down her cheeks.

As the words left her mouth she wanted to take them back almost instantly as the last thing she wanted right now was to rile him up even more. But truth be told she was still holding on to so much anger from that final night they'd spent together that she couldn't hold it back anymore.

She never would have expected that night to be their last, and hadn't expected it to play out how it did at all.

She'd cried the entire day once she'd been told from one of the Elders that Ray had left the village again. No chance of fixing anything, no chance to even say goodbye.

He'd just gone.

Ray's fists clenched at his sides, his pupils getting thinner.

He didn't need her to remind him of what he did, he knew it all too well. He had crossed a line that should never have been crossed, had taken what he and Kai had built up and tore down with his own two hands.

The blame didn't solely lie at her feet, he knew that too, accepted it even, but what Mariah had just said was partly true and that's exactly why he had done it.

It was easy.

Way too easy to just fall back into her in that moment when it was happening because it was familiar, was a comfort he felt his body needed after all the uncertainty with Kai.

He'd be lying to her if he said there was no emotion there when it happened. Like he'd said in Dr Lange's office he probably always will love her, and the feeling of being inside her again may have sparked _something_, but in the moment when his animalistic side had taken over he could be convinced he loved _whoever_ he was screwing if they were tight enough.

When it was all said and done, when it was all over and the wave of ultimate satisfaction had simmered, there was only one person on his mind, and it wasn't _her. _

"Why do you think it was so easy? Because you were and always have been. You've thrown yourself at me constantly and I was the idiot who kept allowing it. That falls on me, but don't you dare stand there and act like you didn't know what you were trying to do, _have_ done, all along since Kai and I got together." He seethed with hot angry breaths, his arms trembling with the pent up emotions he felt rushing through him all at once.

He couldn't stop his sharp tongue now. Any guilt or remorse he'd once felt for her had disappeared entirely.

"It was a mistake, all of it was, if I could take it back I would in a heart beat. So, take the hint I've been giving and leave. Me. Alone. I want nothing more to do with you, do you understand? NOTHING!"

What remained of Mariah's heart shattered into a thousand pieces.

Roughly wiping her streaming eyes with her sleeve she sniffled, the mix of anger, her feeling an utter fool for coming here, and gut wrenching heart break swirled within her.

She had to try and get it together though. She had come here for a reason and as Ray had said earlier she just needed to spit it out.

It was now or never.

Whilst it was hard to ignore the glare he was throwing her way and the burning lump in her throat she firmly started to speak to him as best as she could considering her hoarse throat.

"Ok fine! But you have to listen to me Ray! The reason I'm here is-"

"-I DO NOT CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY MARIAH!" Ray screamed at her, hoping the volume would make it into her pretty dense head. "I can't spell it out any clearer than that. Leave me alone!"

Turning on his heel he just left her there in the courtyard alone with tear stained cheeks and red puffy eyes.

He didn't need to deal with any of this, _especially_ at work, though a faint flicker of curiosity dared to spark his interest.

What was so damn important she had to come all the way over to Japan just to say it?

Stepping into the kitchen again the warmth of the food and ovens hit him again and all he wanted to do now was just leave and go home.

He wiped his lips again for good measure but still felt dirty, the heat and smell of this place only making him feel worse.

"Everything ok Ray? You good?" Came a voice from one of the kitchen staff noticing the lead chef didn't look too chirpy now, and they'd all be lying if they said they hadn't heard him tearing _someone_ a new one out there.

"Yeah.." He sighed out though the only good thing that had come from his outing just now was the cool air on his skin.

Brushing it all off and getting his chef head back on he picked off the slips of paper the waiters had stuck on the board and read out the latest orders that had come through. Calling to the entire kitchen in his usual firm but encouraging tone.

"C'mon, let's finish this service alright guys, I need two plates of the Peking duck, four katsu curries, and three of the seafood donburi."

"Yes chef!"

* * *

x-x-x

Everything was in place now.

The fresh flowers, perfectly arranged in a vase upstairs in their bedroom, the bottle of wine sitting on the dinner table with two sparkling glasses placed in front of either chair. The cutlery professionally placed beside each glass placemat..

The food was in the oven, almost ready, all he needed to do was change into his shirt and-

"Hellooo.. Kai?"

Shit! Ray?!

Eyes darted to the clock on the wall when he'd heard the voice call him from the hall.

He hadn't even heard the door open!

And he still needed to light the candles!

Frantically pulling the box of matches out from his trouser pocket Kai pulled one out before striking it against the red strip on the side. The flame flickering immediately and being hovered over the long stick candle in the centre of the table before rushing to the several other tea lights he had dotted around the dining room.

"Just a second!" He sang back in response over his shoulder, clearly getting flustered as he heard the footsteps approaching.

He hadn't realised the time, had been that preoccupied with ensuring everything was perfect he'd forgotten to keep an eye on the clock; and also the flame that was now quickly burning up the match still clutched between fair fingers.

He cursed out loud under his breath before shaking out the flame, disposing of it in a small trash can and quickly lighting another match for the rest of the candles.

On the other side of the door, out in the hall, Ray had head towards the kitchen expecting to be able to just grab a beer from the fridge, but paused at the closed door to read the little sticky note that had been stuck to it baring Kai's handwriting.

'_Do not enter. Staff only.'_

Huh? He was _staff_.. wasn't he?

"Kai where are you?" He called out getting annoyed now.

He was in no mood for whatever this was. He was hungry, just wanted a drink and to forget today even happened.

Work had been tiring as it was, and then for _her _to turn up just added to the mental draining on an already physically draining day.

Kai then popped his head out from the dining room door though kept the rest of his body out of view.

"Hey."

Ray looked back over his shoulder, turning to face him and just sent a look to the floating head.

"The hell are you doing? What's with the sticky note?" He asked pointing back to the makeshift sign on the kitchen door.

"You should go upstairs." Kai ignored the questions completely and gestured over to the stairs with a tilt of his head.

Ray made a face.

"Why? I don't need t-"

"-Just go will you? Be quick." Kai cut him off, quickly tiring of the back and forth himself, slipped back in to the room and closed the door.

He'd done a good thing dammit, go have a look see!

A sound of irritation escaped the other as Ray rolled his eyes and huffed up the stairs like a child that had been sent to bed early.

He could have a shower he guessed, get himself changed into something comfy.

With a push open of the bedroom door golden eyes were drawn to the huge bouquet of flowers sat on his bedside table before then immediately trailing over to the emerald green shirt and crisp black trousers that were hung up on his wardrobe.

He squinted his eyes some trying to read yet another sticky note that was stuck beside them before heading over and pulling it off the door.

'_Wear this for dinner. Underwear optional ;)'_

A smirk found it's way to his lips before his palm met his face.

_God_ he loved him but he really could _not _be bothered with this right now..

He just wanted to slump, eat shit and have a hard drink, but by gosh that shirt was beautiful and these flowers!

He turned to the vase again, bending slightly to smell them, the smile still sitting on his face.

Gorgeous..

Meanwhile downstairs Kai took one final look of his little home made restaurant, doing a final check of everything as he buttoned his cufflinks. His own pressed dinner shirt being hung up in this room and changing into it once he'd sent Ray up the stairs.

The candles were all lit.. his eyes did a quick scan. Yep, all lit. Wine in place.

A slight smirk sat on his face, proud of his little set up.

"Are you ready babe?" He then called up to Ray from the doorway.

"Yeah just a second!" Came the reply that seemed a lot more chirpier in tone than ten minutes ago.

He must've liked the new shirt and flowers..

Picking up his cologne from the fire place he spritz at either side of his neck, paused for a second before shrugging and spritzing his crotch.

Just in case y'know?

Hiding the bottle then in a random drawer in the glass cabinet that stood beside the fireplace Kai then turned to the small electrical device sitting on top of it.

"Alexa..?"

Not that he often did, but he felt like a complete tool every time he spoke to this daft thing that Ray wanted so much, sceptical of who was actually behind this secret spy he'd willingly allowed into his home.

With the gadget lighting up, giving him her undivided attention, he continued.

"Play some smooth jazz.."

Having brushed through his hair, washed his face and sprayed some body spray to mask some of the food smell Ray started to head back downstairs in the clothes Kai had picked out for him.

He'd have preferred to have had a shower and get properly fixed up, but Kai had said to be quick and with the kitchen being off bounds he could only presume they weren't going out and they were having dinner at home.

"Kai?" He then cautiously called out at the bottom of the stairs, the Russian nowhere to be seen again.

The dining room door then opened, his vision immediately fixing on the other male sporting his own deep purple shirt and black trousers.

A stupid smile fixed itself on Ray's face.

Helluuurrrrr

"Good evening, I believe you have a reservation at our restaurant tonight Monsieur Kon." Kai greeted in his best telephone voice.

"Do I?" Ray sent back, placing a hand on his chest in false surprise and adopting the same upper class tone Kai had just used. "I mean this is news to me but alright."

Ray then lightly chuckled before entering the dining room after Kai had gestured for him to go in.

It wasn't often they came to eat in here. Was mainly used at Christmas and birthday's when they had a number of guests over at the house. But the way Kai had dressed it all up he'd be requesting dinner in here every night now as it was just beautiful.

The dark oak table that usually sat eight had just two chairs placed facing each other, along with two glass placemats, two wine glasses, a whole load of cutlery that Kai was going to have to remind which set he used first, and a long stick candle flickering in the centre of it all.

The dark red velvet curtains were drawn to a close, the lights had been dimmed, the wall mounted display had a crackling log fire on the screen and, was that, jazz?

"Kai.." Ray breathed out as he admired their setting for the evening.

It all becoming clear in an instant on why he'd seemed so spaced out this morning. He'd been planning all this for them.

"What's all this for?"

A proud little smile appeared on the Russian's face as he crept up behind him and wrapped his arms around the other's stomach.

"No reason," He replied in the same hushed tone, placing a kiss on his cheek before softly speaking into his ear. "Just thought I'd show you how much I want to make this work with you."

Ray's throat then started to feel a little tight, and his eyes began to fill up some.

It wasn't as if he wasn't aware of how sweet Kai could be, but the instances were so far and few between each one often made his heart burst to the point he couldn't hold back the emotion.

Knowing him from being this cold stoic kid who didn't know the meaning of the word love, through no fault of his own, but to now setting up a little home restaurant in their dining room and making, he presumed from all the cutlery, a three course dinner for them.

"So what are we having?" Ray then managed to ask, the happy lump in his throat simmering down some.

"Hn?" Kai hummed, his lips still pecking soft kisses on his skin, until he twigged what Ray had said and his eyes immediately widened.

"Shit!"

Bolting off of him he quickly retracted his arms from around Ray's waist and darted from the dining room into the kitchen to check on the food in the oven having completely forgotten about it.

Alone in the 'restaurant' now Ray laughed to himself again when he noticed a folded piece of paper over on the oak wood table next to the candle stand.

Picking it up he looked over it before snorting out louder.

'_Fancy Menu.' _Sat on the top line, again scrawled in Kai's handwriting, and underneath was apparently the name of his makeshift restaurant along with the day he opened.

'_Chez Hiwatari. Est. Today.'_

What a dork. He thought to himself his smile still fixed in place as he pulled out one of the chairs and eased himself down into it before opening up the piece of paper to read the inside.

Kai had a way with words that's for sure. The starter, main and dessert sounding better than what was on Pierre's menu by a long shot.

'_A rich Belgian chocolate fondant accompanied with a summer fruit coulis, dusted with edible gold flakes.'_

Ray practically drooled wanting to skip straight to dessert if that's what they were having..

It wasn't long before Kai re-entered in a slight fluster, holding two smallish plates in each hand containing their starter.

Setting one down in front of him, the other where he was sitting opposite, Kai sat back down into his chair and in his best French accent gave him:

"Bon appétit Monsieur Kon."

_Swoooooon!_

Digging straight in, a comfortable silence fallen upon them, the two had finished their small starter in no time, and having brought through their mains Kai sat himself back down before starting conversation.

"So how was your day?" He asked taking a glance over across the table and placing a fork full of food into his mouth.

Ray's heart had skipped a beat at the question not even wanting to think about anything that had happened prior to him coming home this evening.

"Busy." He bluntly gave him without meaning to, cutting into the piece of chicken breast on his plate. "Marie was off sick so I was basically running two stations at lunch."

"Ah that sucks.. She alright?" His tone held minor concern. He'd met her once or twice when he'd picked him up from work the odd time. She seemed nice enough.

"Mhm.. Yeah." Was all Ray responded with as he kept his gaze down on his plate, _really_ not wanting to talk about work any more, or the day he'd had in general.

Kai slowly nodded to him, taking the clear hint and left it, fixing back on his own food.

Must've been a pretty rough day..

"So.. you like it?" He then asked after a moment of silence, trying to keep up the conversation and gesturing to the plate in front when golden eyes looked up to him.

"Mm! Yeah! It's delicious babe! You've really out done yourself." He'd sent Kai a smile though his words clearly didn't make the male opposite feel any better as he just gave him a simple nod and looked back down to his plate.

Ray had noticed the half smile and the fact he was pushing his food around some now, he could tell he'd brought Kai's mood down with his and felt awful now.

He reached out to him across the table, crimson eyes glancing to it before a fair hand silently joined it in the middle and intertwined.

"I'm sorry babe today was just.. long.. Tonight's been really lovely though so thank you.."

Kai gazed into the appreciative eyes that were locked on him before sending him another smile and squeezing his hand a little.

"Well get used to it 'cos I'm gonna be doing this a whole lot more from now on." He promised.

It hadn't been all that difficult.

Sure it took him two attempts with that damn broccoli puree but he just never had to do that again..

Having finished off the dessert Ray had looked forward to after seeing it on the menu and it being as divine as it sounded, he exhaled a content sigh as he leaned back into his chair and placed his hands on his full stomach.

"That. Was. Delicious."

Kai smacked his lips together and placed his spoon down as he finished shortly afterwards.

"Mm was alright wasn't it?"

He'd definitely be buying – uh, _making_ that dessert again...

"I'll go ahead and do the dishes." Ray then announced, sliding his chair back as he went to stand up from the table but was stopped by a sudden hand being held up to him.

"Ohh no no.. the date isn't over yet.."

Ray frowned a little in confusion, freezing in place.

"What do you mean?"

Kai eased himself up from his chair, waving for Ray to sit back down which he did and started to head out of the room, Ray's head turning as he followed him walk to the door.

"Give me two minutes okay?"

Ray nodded to him staying put at the table, making himself useful and reached for Kai's dessert plate and placed it on top of his to help tidy up a little.

What else could he possibly have planned for them?

"Hey Ray, come into the living room!"

Hearing Kai's call Ray did as he was told and stood up from the table, leaving the remains of their dinner date behind and wandered out into the hall and to the room adjacent.

Once more a ridiculous smile appeared on the Chinese male's face when he took a glance around the room. A chuckle escaping him as he bashfully approached the other who had a TV remote in one hand, and a bowl of popcorn in the other.

"I thought we could catch a movie too? Unless you had to get yourself home or something.."

Turning to the TV Kai pressed play on the remote and chucked it on the couch, beckoning him over with a tilt of his head.

Ray's lips parted though closed again fixing into a coy smile..

_God_ he loved him!

With Kai sitting himself down on the sofa Ray walked over to join him, snuggling into his side and resting his head on his shoulder.

"Dinner _and_ movies.. wow you must really like me huh?"

Kai just smirked, holding out the bowl of popcorn for him.

"Something like that.."

Taking a small hand full Ray popped it in his mouth before Kai reached for his own handful.

"Don't be getting used to _this_ though," Kai continued, "Dinner is one thing but the cinema is expensive nowadays, that'll have to be once a month kinda thing.. when you've been good."

It was then Ray's turn to smirk.

"Ahh Is that so?.. What if I don't feel like being good though?"

A slate head of hair then tilted to him before walking fair finger's up the other's thigh.

"Well, a bad boy would deserve a different evening entirely.."

Ray then grabbed a hold of the cheeky hand that had crawled towards his crotch and giggled out before taking a pointless look around their empty living room and tried to use Kai's own game against him.

"You can't do that in a movie theatre Kai, _god_, people might see us.."

His face was then turned to lock with ruby coloured eyes, when the same fair hand wriggled out of his lose grip and lifted to his jawline.

"Shhh.. no one's looking.."


	19. Sweet and Sour

A/N: Can't believe we're in May already.. Everyone well? Considering?

Many thanks as always for the love on this, (and lil shout out to Claire for the pointers on therapist lingo) though.. I've a feeling you're going to dislike her even more this chapter. xD

Hope y'all enjoy regardless, and everyone is keeping safe and sane.

K~

* * *

Chapter 19 - Sweet and Sour

"_Fuck! Don't stop!... Oh god.. K-Kai!"_

It was moments like these Ray was thankful that they lived in a detached home as shameless moans had torn through his throat all night and the majority of the morning.

Was that his ninth orgasm now? He'd honestly lost count...

All he knew was that Kai had had him facing in every direction of this room and they were going to have to restart that movie as they'd only seen the first ten minutes before things started to get steamy on the couch.

He was going to be late for work if they continued this, and didn't Kai also have his therapy session today?

"_Mm_, that's my name.."

A smug purr came from under the sheets, shortly followed by delicate kisses being placed all up a toned and tanned stomach before finishing in the crook of Ray's neck.

"Time for another round?"

The seductive whisper in his ear sent a pleasurable chill down his spine causing half open amber eyes to drop shut again.

God he loved it when he was like this but he wasn't stupid.

"I know what you're doing Kai.." Ray spoke low with a smirk on his face, no intentions of stopping the kisses on his neck just yet but they both had to start making a move soon.

".. Don't know.. what.. you mean.." Kai replied between kisses that had now trailed up to Ray's jawline.

"Yes you do, you and I both know that you have your session today with Doct-"

Ray's words were muffled as Kai pressed his lips against his and took it upon himself to try and turn it into a full blown make out session, his tongue taking complete advantage of Ray's open mouth and circling within it.

"-mmf! Kai.. Stop!" He laughed out trying to catch his breath and pressing on the others bare chest to create some distance between them. "Don't be trying to use me to get out of your appointment!"

"Would I ever..?" He attempted to sound innocent as he went back to placing kisses down Ray's jaw and neck again, trailing down onto his collar bone, his chest, and really pushing his luck with slipping back under the covers and edging himself down lower, and lower...

"Kai!" Ray chuckled out and squirmed like he'd just been tickled, taking a loose handful of slate coloured hair in one hand and lifting up the sheets with the other as the kisses had gotten dangerously close to his crotch.

"That's enough now, we need to get up." He scolded through his laughter.

Kai looked up to him from under the covers and sent him a smirk.

"I mean, that's sorta what I was gonna work on down here.."

Ray snorted. "No! _Up,_ up! Out of bed, shower, up!"

Kai raised a brow, the devilish grin still fixed on his lips as he crawled his way back up to be face to face with him.

"Mm, good idea.. We can gladly take this to the shower if you really want kitten?"

Cupping his hands over his face, Ray laughed into them before playfully pushing Kai off of him, throwing his legs off the side of the bed and easing himself up.

As much as he'd _love_ to stay in the sack with him all day he had work and Kai had an appointment with Dr Lange.

"You're too much.." He teased, leaning down to place a quick kiss on Kai's lips and retreating before he got any more ideas to stall for time.

"I won't be long." Ray added coyly over his shoulder before slipping into the bathroom and jumping in the shower to wash away the night's events.

Kai watched him go with a loved up smile, eyes fixed on the bare ass that had swayed over to the door before exhaling an audible sigh and gazed up at the ceiling.

Was worth a try he guessed..

Not that he was seriously using Ray just now but they were clearly more than fine again so he didn't even understand why he was insisting he still went to the damn appointment.

Things had been better hadn't they?

Hell he seemed to have enjoyed last night - as had he.

Couldn't they just stay in bed, have pancakes for breakfast and cuddle?

Last night had been the closest he'd felt to him for the longest time, he didn't want it to end.. _Neither _redhead or.. pink-head had so much as crossed his mind.

It had been awesome..

So why did he have to go and chat with some random stranger who was just going to bring up the past again and have him dwell on it.

He reached over to his bedside table and pressed the button on his phone to check the clock.

There was still time..

Pulling the covers off him he crept over to the en-suite bathroom like he was about to rob the place, quietly turned the handle and pushed open the door. The steam that filled the tiled room hiding him whilst he stalked over, taking in the wet tanned body currently occupying the cubicle completely oblivious of his presence.

He snuck in to the shower, a gasp of fright followed by a laugh emitted from the other before simply giving in and allowing fair hands to roam his body once more.

One more round wouldn't hurt...

_[A/N: If you'd like to read the continuation of this cheeky scene head over to my page on Ao3 and find '**Dedication'** ;) ]_

* * *

x-x-x

Pulling up outside the stone building once again, Kai was already wanting to go home and he hadn't even switched off the engine.

Like the first time he came here with Ray, the same swirl of anxiety churned in his stomach only unlike before he had no one to assure him it was going to all be okay.

It's not like Ray would even know if he went in or not, and with client confidentiality Lange wouldn't be able to say as to whether he attended if he were to call and check..

There was a nice little café over the road; he could just sit in there for an hour.. have a coffee, go through some e-mails..

With a groan he flicked off the engine and stepped out the car.

Was only an hour. What could _really_ happen in an hour?

Hn..Best not answer that..

Pfft, if anyone needed therapy surely it was _that_ guy not him..

Wait, why was he even thinking about _him_ right now?!

Guess he just associated the redhead with anxiety and bitterness. Whenever something bad was happening the devil was bound to come to mind..

It'd been almost two weeks since that disastrous double date. Two whole weeks since he'd got a grip of himself and stopped letting the wolf lick his wounds clean.

Deleting that number was the best thing he'd ever done. Never should have let him have it in the first place! Should've kept all communication to a minimum at the house and anything more so should've gone via Tiffany.

The second he typed in the final digit in to his phone he knew.. _knew _it was a mistake but what an understatement that turned out to be.

Walking through the automatic glass doors the same blonde receptionist greeted him, told him to take a seat and help himself to the refreshments table.

He'd grabbed himself a water but as he sat back down he heard a handle click and Dr Lange appeared at her office door.

"Good morning Kai." She said with a slight nod of her head. "Would you like to come through?"

Not really, he thought, though carried himself into the room anyway, sitting down in the same chair he'd sat in at their first session and waiting to be spoken to like he always did.

Without Ray here to dilute any of this he was starting to feel the same uneasiness he'd felt during the times he'd had a one on one session when he was younger.

It wasn't like he didn't know the drill though and how these things usually played out.

They'd start by asking how he was, then make some idle chit chat about the weather to get him _comfortable; _'Build trust.'

All these clowns were the same.

He was fine. Had nothing to worry about.

Still wasn't overly impressed being here though.. He'd made the effort for couple's therapy for Ray, but he'd never agreed to a solo session.. _That_ wasn't part of the deal.

"So I trust you're well? Bit cooler today isn't it? Winter must be coming.." Dr Lange chuckled out, settling herself down into her chair opposite him and with the blank expression on his face becoming clearer after she'd popped her glasses on, it became apparent the reference she'd made just now had been completely lost on him.

"Not a fan? Never mind.." She cleared her throat, looked down at her notes and flicked through a few pages.

"Right let's see here.."

Kai just sat back and watched her.

This was a familiar sight.

The only difference between this whole scene and the last was the change of clothes between them.

Dr Lange's position was as it was before with her pen already in hand waiting to hover over her notepad and write down her analysis of him.

All her thoughts, opinions.

Ugh. He didn't care what she thought or anyone did for that matter. Never had done.

The only opinion that mattered was his and Ray's and they could both tell her that they were _fine! _Didn't need any of this!

Once she'd refreshed herself with all that had occurred previously her gaze snapped up to him through her rimless glasses.

"So our first session with Ray was quite eventful wasn't it! How were things between you both after you left here that day?"

Eventful was one word for it...

"Fine... We went out for lunch at a place nearby here.. was nice."

Though he was recalling an event that sparked joy within him, (their date really had been nice), and it had been the start of them coming back from this mess, his face and tone suggested it had been anything but.

He spoke very briefly, blunt in fact.

Clear bitterness sitting on his words that he was reluctant to even send the woman's way now.

She nodded to him whilst jotting something down.

"Good, good. I'm glad to hear."

"Mhm."

Steel grey eyes took a glimpse up over her glasses at him who in turn took his own glance away from her.

He was like a wild animal, hostile and sceptical she noted.

She knew she'd be able to hazard a good guess as to why she was receiving such a cold reception right now but she couldn't put words in his mouth.

She'd play along though.

"You seem a little tense today Kai, is there something you'd like to talk about?"

He looked down to his shirt and picked off a bit of fluff before shaking his head.

"Nope.. I'm good."

She held on to the sigh that was threatening to escape her and pressed her thin lips together.

If her aging memory served her correctly she was pretty sure they'd discussed meeting people half way last session but never mind. She was determined to crack him so took another step forward and reiterated.

She'd get it out of him one way or another. She'd spoon feed many a client; Kai Hiwatari wasn't anything special.

"Are you sure?" Her tone could have been described as patronising, taunting almost.

"Is there perhaps something from our previous session, the one with Ray that you'd like to revisit? To discuss?"

She watched him shift in his seat, and it was slight but she could tell that his jaw had clenched. Irritatingly for her though he remained silent.

'_Come on Kai.. you know you want to get it off your chest..' _She mentally urged as she watched the internal torment before her.

His lips then parted, and she felt herself leaning forward.

"Yeah actually there was something I wouldn't mind addressing.."

_Fabulous.._

Regardless of the tone of warning that came from him, her position relaxed back into her leather chair and her expression remained unfazed.

This hour was going to be interesting it would seem.

"Oh? Please, _do_ share."

Kai cleared his throat.

Now that he'd said it out loud he was wishing he'd just stayed quiet but after her little stunt during the last session he'd been wanting to have it out with her since.

"I uh.. couldn't help but feel like I was a little, _blamed _for everything when we all last spoke together.." He started with clear unease in his tone before reeling off more.

"...And not to state the obvious_,_ but I didn't really appreciate you asking how Ray felt about, _her,_ whilst I was still in the room.. I'd like to know what were you actually expecting to come from that?"

There was no denying that that had stung.

The whole act itself was one thing but to know that there'd been actual feelings behind it just made it so much worse in Kai's opinion.

Yes he knew what he'd done with Tala was wrong, despicable, unforgiveable even.

But it had just been sex. Raw, animalistic sex.

Sure, sex to a lot of people is this deep, meaningful emotional bond. An intimate act that you don't just do with anyone. They have to care about the other with every fibre of their being and feel physically and spiritually connected before crossing that line and delving into a bubble of passion.

But for Kai he'd never had to feel such things to want to explore another. Until he met Ray emotions had never even come into it.

Sex was just what it was - Sex.

He didn't give a shit about Tala's life or his feelings, nor did the redhead give a rats about his.

What they did was solely for the climax and it was the thrill that kept it going. There was a physical attraction between them of course, but he felt nothing else.

And that's why what Ray did was so much worse...

He'd actually loved Mariah. Probably had all these plans to get married, and have children, _both_ of which he had zero interest in and he'd revisited that; Because he missed it. Clearly.

He didn't need doc over here to tell him he wasn't providing enough for him... he knew that.

But then the same question could be flipped on him.

Why had he kept revisiting Tala?

What did he feel was missing from his own relationship that he had to seek something else from another?

One time was easily considered a mistake. But multiple?

That had been a choice.

Whilst Dr Lange was pleased Kai had finally opened up, (and that her suspicions had been correct after all), an apologetic smile appeared on her lips as she set down her pen on her notepad and rested it on her lap.

"Well first let me start by sincerely apologising to you Kai if I made you feel that I was blaming anything on you during our first session. That wasn't my intention, however I had an inkling you'd leave here with a negative feeling and this is exactly why I solely wanted to speak with you separately, and have a chance to shed some light on my process."

A slate brow rose.

Mhm.. he was listening.

"I of course had no idea how Ray felt, or _does _feel rather, towards his previous partner, but the main point of that exercise was to see how you responded to him talking about her.." She began to explain.

"The fact that it caused you to show an immense amount of upset to the point you vacated the room shows that you're quite passionate and do genuinely love him. This is of course, a very good sign."

Kai didn't say anything but by his expression he was mulling over her words.

Well of course he loved him. Didn't need a psychology degree to work that one out, but it made sense why she did what she did he figured.

Still hurt though..

"Would you say that you often remove yourself from conversations, or situations that make you feel uncomfortable?"

Kai thought for a moment before sending her a one shouldered shrug.

"Yeah I guess?"

Didn't everyone?

"So you wouldn't describe yourself as even slightly confrontational? If you could feel an argument was about to occur for instance, you'd rather just walk away than fight it out? Even if you believed you were in the right?"

Kai shook his head to her.

"Arguing isn't really my thing. I've better things to be doing with my time to be honest."

Sure he could snap on the odd occasion but generally he couldn't be bothered with the noise of it all. People can believe what they want. He knew what was right and what wasn't.

Why waste his breath and energy on petty spats?

A sigh then escaped the older woman's nose.

"Sometimes Kai, conflict _needs_ to happen for issues to be resolved. If only one party is airing out their thoughts and problems and the other is just dismissing them like they don't exist I'm sure you could agree it wouldn't be unnatural for the troubled party to then seek out another ear to listen.."

A look was then immediately sent her away from the other side of her desk.

"So there you go, you're blaming me again!"

Ugh! This woman!

Dr Lange raised her hand and shook her head.

"I'm not _blaming_ you Kai. Whilst I agree that Ray's choice of ear, wasn't the best one as I'm sure she perhaps had ulterior motives-"

"-Too right she fucking did." Kai spat, cutting her off with a scoff, words dripping in salt before folding his arms and turning slightly sheepish at the silently scolding look he was receiving for his language.

".. Sorry."

She accepted the apology with a nod of her head before continuing.

"As I was saying, his ex wasn't the best choice of ear I agree, but I also agree that even whilst you're in a partnership both parties are allowed to have some kind of emotional support from _outside_ of the relationship."

Kai frowned at her. That didn't sound right..

"I should be the _first_ choice though? Surely?"

Lange loosely clasped her hands together resting them on her lap and sent him a nod.

His tone just now made him sound vulnerable almost. It seemed like he was really opening up and was needing some form of reassurance from her.

He cared for her opinion after all..

"You probably were his first choice Kai, but if your natural response is to avoid and walk away from a situation that you can sense is going in a direction you don't like, or could potentially become heated then you can't really blame Ray for then confiding in, let's remember, his _second _choice.. Like I said, I'm not blaming you here, however your avoidant nature I can't deny has somewhat backfired on you in this instance."

Leaving him to process what she'd said she took a moment to peer down to her notes and flick back through a few of the pages, quickly scanning her scribbles.

"So after you'd left to take a moment during our first session, naturally, me and Ray kept on talking, and we spoke about the moment that he'd confessed to you. It was once you'd both arrived back home, the same day he'd returned from China is that correct?"

Kai sent her a brief nod, exhaling a sigh through his nose as he propped his head up on the palm of his hand, that wave of nausea that had started to settle down building back up again.

Did they _really_ have to revisit this?

"He said that you didn't lash out in any way, neither angrily or by shedding a tear. Is this true?"

Kai shrugged to her.

"Crying isn't really my thing either.." He admitted. "Never has been."

If he had to go down the whole childhood trauma rabbit hole again, by god!

"Hm.. Well I can understand why hearing such news would be emotionally numbing, and from what I've gathered from you thus far is that you're quite stoic and reserved, that's fine.. But what I want to know Kai is why was your first response, after Ray's confession, was to ask Ray what you both did moving forward?"

Slate brows knitted together before shrugging.

Whilst some parts of that scene were clear as day to him, others were blurred.

He'd tried desperately since that day to forget about the whole thing. He couldn't remember completely what he'd said or what Ray said, or what either of them did.

The main thing he remembered was how he felt the moment that confession reached his ears.

His heart feeling like it had shattered into a million pieces but he was also just seeing red.

In more ways than one..

Where was she going with this though?

Seeing the confusion she continued to dissect.

"Forgive me, but that kind of response contradicts the one you displayed before, and would generally point to someone who _doesn't_ care all that much.. There is also another reason as to why one might shift the ruling but I don't believe that needs mentioning as I don't think that's the case here.."

Kai seemed to lean into her words, giving her his full attention.

"Well I _do_ care sooo, what's the other reason?"

Dr Lange took off her glasses and placed them down on the desk in front of her.

"Someone carrying an immense amount of guilt and for some reason feeling they deserved the treatment that had occurred so felt no right to lash out." She answered matter of fact.

"Be honest with me here Kai.."

He instantly tensed up at that, forcing himself to drink his water in an attempt to relieve his dried throat as he locked with the seemingly knowing aging eyes.

"Does Ray harm you in anyway? Physically or, verbally? _Mentally_ even?"

The breath he'd been holding for a moment exhaled through his parted lips in relief.

Really? He would have chuckled at the question if it wasn't for the grave tone she'd just used.

"No, of course he doesn't. I wouldn't stay with anyone like that." He informed, feeling like he was stating the obvious though was sure she'd encountered many a toxic relationship in her line of work so it was a topic she couldn't take lightly.

"I'm glad to hear."

She believed him so continued, his confirmation of that, unbeknownst to him, allowing her to come to her final conclusion though she needed to hear him say it.. admit to it.

"Can you tell me then Kai, why you would possibly feel you had no right to feel angry after finding out?"

"Uhm.. I don't know.."

Though he did know. Exactly.

How could he have possibly lost his shit with Ray when the very night he'd dropped him off at the airport he got balls deep with another man?!

He could feel her eyes all on him now so avoided them with his own completely. Feeling his palms starting to get clammy he brought down the hand that had been propping his head up and shifted in his seat.

Dr Lange noticed.

"In that moment Kai you had just found out that your partner of, a fair few years now, had just committed adultery and the first thing you did was throw the ball, you _very_ rightly deserved to hold, back into Ray's court...Why?"

She set her note pad down on the desk beside her glasses and sat herself upright. Leaning forward with her elbows on the desk and her fingers pressed together in a steeple, her eyes focused on nothing but him.

She wouldn't need to write any of this down.

The expression he was displaying was one she'd seen many a time and wouldn't forget.

Kai Hiwatari may not be one for words, might not be a huge speaker but it was fine. Even with his mouth closed the answer right now was written all over his face.

"Hm?" She pressed after receiving nothing. "Why would you let Ray have the control after _all_ he'd done?"

"I- I don't know." He blurted out in his fluster.

"I think you do Kai.."

"I don't!"

He felt sick, his breathing became erratic and he felt incredibly warm now.

Looking back on it now, no, he hadn't gotten angry with him at all.

He just sat there in shock. Hadn't felt such internal conflict since he was a teenager.

"So you mean to tell me you've absolutely no reason?" Her tone reeked of scepticism as she patronisingly tilted her head to him.

"I- Well- Because-"

He had nothing. No answer at all.

Couldn't even string together a sentence never mind a believable excuse.

Hell, an obvious lie would suffice right now but his throat had closed on him completely and felt like he was going to puke.

He knew that she knew.

And he had to get out of here.

"S-Sorry, excuse me for a moment." He stammered out standing up from his seat though Dr Lange held up her hand causing him to instantly pause and look to her like a deer in headlights.

"Be honest with me Kai.." She said to him again.

"Are you having an affair?"

* * *

x-x-x

Golden eyes stood staring up towards the house at the bottom of the paved driveway. It was the biggest one on the street, of course, so it hadn't been hard to find.

She wouldn't have expected anything less of a residence owned by a Hiwatari.

Had more money than sense that family..

Ray had truly fallen on his feet with him that's for sure.

Coming from a small remote village in China to now living in a big four bedroomed house just outside Beycity was more than a small step up.

Was more than she could ever hope to provide him with.. She'd clearly been no competition against Kai so why she'd even tried so hard to get him back in the first place she wasn't sure now.

Gingerly heading up the brick drive she held up her clenched and clammy hand ready to knock on the door but lowered it again as her nerves had kicked in.

She couldn't do it...

Why she was still trying for this conversation after the reception she got from him yesterday she didn't know.. but then again she did..

She took in a deep inhale through her nose and audibly exhaled through her mouth trying to steady herself.

She didn't sleep a great deal last night. Not just because she was in a random hotel room, but more so she was unable to believe that he had just cut her off before she'd had a chance to tell him anything.

Did he not have the slightest bit of curiosity of what she had to say?

Did he _really_ not care to know why she'd flown all the way from China _just_ to speak to him?

The guy really needed to get over himself if he seriously thought for one minute she did all of that just because she wanted to be with him.

He was a good lay but not _that _great..

After the way he'd treated her, continues to treat her, she knew now that if given the chance she wouldn't want to be with him anyway.

He'd changed, and in her opinion not for the better.

But regardless of how either of them felt about each other she was here to make an announcement and Ray was going to just stay quiet, stand there and listen.

She took in another breath. Like ripping off a band aid it was now or never.

She knocked on the front door before instantly taking a step backwards.

Oh god she'd done it..

Standing there with her arms wrapped around herself, she chewed on her bottom lip as she waited.

Whilst she wasn't exactly looking forward to anyone answering the door, now that she'd done it, she was hoping.. no, _praying _that she would lock with familiar golden eyes.

She wouldn't know what she'd do if she was met with ruby. The mere thought of that encounter shot her anxiety through the roof.

Though it would seem she wouldn't have to worry about either of them as after a minute or two and even after a second knock, the door remained closed and it became apparent that no one was home.

Instantly she felt deflated.

Guess today wasn't going to be the day to reveal either..

Her eyes began to water, her lower lip wobbling a little before a single tear overflowed down her tanned cheek.

Maybe she should just keep this to herself. Clearly Ray wasn't meant to know and this was the universe trying to tell her of that fact, protect her perhaps.

She turned from the door and stepped down off the porch step, feeling almost mournful as she started to head back down the drive when a car slowly pulled in and parked up several feet from her.

She wiped at her glistening eyes to clear her vision.

It was black in its entirety, the windows tinted too so she couldn't make out the driver.

She had no idea what car Ray had, or if he even drove for that matter.

But she was pretty sure a Mercedes was way above his pay grade..

Which could only mean..

As soon as he'd turned the corner he'd locked on the radiant pink hair.

Stomach sinking as crimson refused to leave the petite frame that had dared to walk onto his property and he could only presume had knocked on his front door.

This was _not_ happening right now.

After his hour with Dr Lange that involved his own teary confession followed by complete transparency and psychoanalysis of why he possibly did what he did, he was _now_ being greeted with one of the possible factors that had pushed him in the first place?

His entire car ride home had been a silent and vacant blur as he processed everything. It settling in that, regardless of what Lange had tried to reassure him with, he was the biggest piece of shit to walk this Earth and his punishment now was having more salt rubbed into his open and bleeding wounds having to face _her!_

This was _not _happening right now!

The engine's purr died down, and after a moment the car door popped open.

Mariah stood there frozen. Knowing she should run as fast as her legs would carry her but her feet wouldn't move. She was just fixed, planted to the floor out of fear and perhaps desperation.

She needed to speak to Ray.. So if _he_ was her only chance of getting to do that then she just had to grab it with both hands.

Two toned slate hair shortly appeared from the door before his full height then came into view.

He'd grown a fair few inches since she saw him last in person. At a guess she'd put him around six foot now.

Still good looking, perhaps even more so in his age. Annoyingly, regardless of her feelings towards him there was no denying he'd always been handsome.

Had his eyes always burned that bright though?

His expression to Mariah was dangerously unreadable. It always had been since their teens. Always looked like death warmed up so she could never get her head around it when Ray had told her they were an item.

'_In a relationship with Kai Hiwatari'_

Really?

What was there to even like about him?! Honestly?!

Sure he was a notorious bad boy. She could understand the physical appeal but besides his looks, bad ass reputation, money and status - What else did he actually offer?

Love and affection?

Pah! Was he even capable of such?

Even with the internal rants and hatred for him her heart was racing all the same. The other familiarity with him was he was still intimidating as hell..

The two of them stared at each other for what felt like an eternity before Kai broke the silence.

"What the fuck do _you_ want?"

His tone dripped with venom, his eyes remaining on her as he flicked his car door to a close.

Mariah stood her ground.

"I came to speak with Ra-"

"-Why?" He spoke through gritted teeth as he cut her off.

"I-It's none of your business Kai!" She managed to snap beside herself, feeling her heart pound violently within her chest. "This is between me and Ray. It's nothing to do with you!"

Kai let out a dark laugh.

"Considering everything Mariah, I think it's got _everything_ to fucking do with me. Whatever you have to say to him, you can say to me first."

Mariah sneered at him before turning on her heel and started to head back down the bricked drive.

"Just tell him that I need to talk to him okay?" She demanded though her voice didn't hold much threat with it cracking.

She hated him. Had hated him since he took Galux from her and even more so when he took Ray.

She couldn't stay here. That disgustingly smug look on his face was boiling her blood.

Pompous prick!

Kai's demeanour had remained the same, not giving a shit for the girl's feelings and even let out another laugh for good measure.

"Yeah sure, course I will." His tone sagged with sarcasm as he sauntered up the drive and to the front door.

Was this bitch for real?

She had some balls though he'd give her that.

"Well thanks for stopping by. Anything else you'd like me to pass on since apparently I'm just your fucking messenger?"

Mariah's fists clenched at her side. Pressing her lips together she turned to look over her shoulder only to see his arrogant face looking down at her.

"Didn't think so.." He bit. "Now run along like the mangy tramp you are."

Burning rage was more than bubbling away within her and she knew she shouldn't add anymore fuel to this fire, should just keep on walking, but the temptation to wipe that smug look off his face was too much.

"Two words Kai. Two words is all I have to say to you that would absolutely _destroy you._" She threatened, voice low and gaining bite as she turned to face him again. "Keep pushing me and I swear!"

She was sure he would have found out afterwards anyway but she had wanted to tell Ray first. Kai disagreed, but this had nothing to do with him.

The way this was going though she could see herself completely losing her cool and speak without thinking.

Kai let out another laugh.

She was quite entertaining.

"Destroy me? Bless. You really are deluded aren't you?"

Turning the key in the front door he pulled down the handle before turning to face her again.

"You might have thought you were slick with your little stunt but it didn't destroy me, him, _or_ us. We're fine. Still as strong as ever, and nothing is going to change that. So go on. Run along. Do everyone a favour and fuck off back to that shit hole you call a home."

His words kept digging into her, but she was the one with the knife here. Knowing that she had the upper hand it was her turn to adopt a cocky tone.

"Oh I'll leave for now Kai but unfortunately for you, in the long run, I'm not going anywhere.. I'm _always _going to be a part of Ray's life."

"Like hell you are!" Kai argued. "He doesn't want shit to do with you Mariah!"

He'd said it but he wasn't sure.

"_Do you still have feelings for this ex of yours?"_

"_I think I always will..."_

He thought he'd buried it. Buried the upset of what Ray's words had brought him.

Last night being a huge leap forward in them being back on track, but seeing Mariah in the flesh was digging it all back up.

Taking note of his rising temper, Mariah took a glance down to her polished fingernails.

"I actually spoke a little with him yesterday, did he tell you? We kissed outside of his work, y'know just outside that white door at the back?"

Kai's jaw clenched.

How would she..

"You're a fucking liar!" He roared.

No. He wasn't going to believe that. She was just trying to get under his skin. Desperation is what this was. Pathetic desperation!

Though it would explain why he was a little off with him at first over dinner.. But he was just tired! He said he was tired!

"Oh yeah?" She continued to chime out. "Go and take a look at his work shirt from yesterday. You'll see someone had spilt soy sauce on his right sleeve. If I wasn't there Kai how would I know that?"

His heart began to race.

He had noticed the odd placement of the dark liquid when he spoke to him from outside the dining room door last night before dinner...

A lucky guess! That's all!

"He gets covered in shit all the time, like that proves anything!" He spat to her.

Oh how the roles had reversed.

It was Mariah's turn to let out a dark chuckle.

"Stay in denial Kai.. However, you know what _can't _be denied? Photographic evidence."

Rummaging in her hoodie pocket she fished out a small polaroid looking photo and held it out to him.

She'd always imagined her pregnancy announcement to be one filled with delight, filled with joy. Both her and the father sat on the bathroom floor clutching the test waiting in excited anticipation.

Though, whilst she was sat, she was alone, hysterically sobbing as she saw the plus sign appear on the test's screen.

"And what the fuck is that?" His voice cracked as he blurted out the question though knew the answer.

_No.. no no no...it can't be... please don't let it be.._

"_That_ is Ray's child. I'm pregnant Kai."

Like someone had taken a sledge hammer to a mirror, Kai's whole world shattered before his own eyes as her words rang in his ears.

The very floor beneath him feeling like it was moving so much so he had to hold on to the door handle to keep him upright.

"No... You're lying!"

"You'll more than likely see him before me. So if you wouldn't mind, pass on the message for me? Many thanks." She sneered, flicking her hair over her shoulder and heading down the driveway.

Kai stood for a moment as he watched her go. His lips parted slightly in shock.

It was a surprise the door didn't break off its hinges with the sheer force he had slammed it shut.

He was speechless.

Ruby eyes glaring at the door, his chest rapidly heaving in and out like he'd just sprinted a mile, trying to suppress the seething rage that was coursing through his veins at an alarming rate.

He'd never been this angry before. Never felt so stupid.

He felt sick. Violently sick.

His stomach churning on him, his heart pounding against his ribcage.

He steadied himself, resting a hand on the wall in the hall, his eyes still on the door before him when it started to lose focus, his vision blurring.

Was... was he crying?

He roughly rubbed his eyes as they began to fill and trickle down his cheeks. His throat now burning as he tried to swallow away the painful lump though was unable to suppress the sobs that had now started to pour out of it.

This was it.

There was no coming back from this now.

He could've stayed in denial before. Just never spoke of it again, move on and pretend like none of it ever happened.

But there was a life involved now.

A child that would forever be a reminder of what had happened.

What _he'd_ done.

If Kai was thinking straight he could have realised that that baby scan photo could have actually belonged to anyone. Though what twisted human being would lie about such a thing?

And even if she was pregnant, there was no proof to say that Ray was even the father.

For all he knew Ray could have been simply one of many. The little tramp may very well have already been pregnant before he'd even gone to China, and had he taken a moment to stop, breathe and think about that, he could have contacted the relevant people and had some kind of paternity test performed to be sure.

But he wasn't thinking straight.

He was seething.

So much so he'd already smashed up the living room, downed three shots of whiskey and now had his phone to his ear.

After a few rings the bright cheery voice came through.

"Afternoon sir! What can I do for you toda-"

"- I need you to send me the landscaper's number again."

Tiffany could tell by his tone and the way he'd just cut her off that he was in _zero_ mood for a conversation. Something had clearly happened.

She was also pretty sure she'd heard him sniffle.

She really hoped for Tala's sake that nothing had gone wrong in the yard...

"Oh, okay, no problem sir...Everything alright?"

"Mhm. You got it?"

"Uh yes.. I'll text you it okay?"

Tiffany blinked for a moment waiting for confirmation, though after looking at her screen she saw that Kai had hung up the call.

She _really _hoped nothing had gone wrong in the yard.

Of all the times for utmost efficiency this was one of them, and to Kai's satisfaction the text came through within seconds and the devil's digits were sat on his screen once more.

To hell with feeling like this anymore.

The two of them were welcome to each other!

Ray wanted a cute little family well he can go fucking have one!

Dr Lange's words of advice were long gone as his fingers pounded on his phone screen, a firm press on send a moment later.

[I'd like to arrange that meeting.]


	20. What Goes Around

A/N: Ohhhhh I don't think you's are ready for this..

No seriously, I don't.

Go get ya self some popcorn though 'cos shit is about to go dooownn... *slurps tea*

Big shout out to the wife and side piece, Lux and Roy, for their help with this!

The group chat was wild lemme tell you.

You both keep me sane ladies, and I just wanna say that I lov- think you're both alright.

Anyhoo, try to ignore my evil laughing in the background and enjoy!

K~

* * *

Chapter 20 - What goes around...

Crimson eyes bore into the phone screen for what seemed like forever.

Why wasn't Tala responding?

All the times before he had replied to him almost instantly and _now_ is when he decides to be busy?

He roughly set the phone down onto the counter with a smack, keeping his palm on top of it.

He had to let go of it or he'd crush it with his bare hands.

Only he didn't and slid it off the counter to pick it straight back up again.

Maybe he should text him one more time.

No, Kai, put it down.

He slammed the phone on the granite again, a cocktail of rage, adrenaline and alcohol coursing through him, and the fact that he could see Tala had read the message was only enraging him further.

Really? He was just going to leave him on _read_?

Maybe it was a good thing that he wasn't responding though...

All that was running through him was a recipe for disaster on its own so throwing the redhead in the mix would only make things worse.

Like he had originally been, maybe Tala was done with whatever this was too? Gone back to his normal life and like he had been, pretending none of it had ever happened.

Maybe his wife had the kid already? If he remembered correctly she only had a few weeks to go so perhaps becoming a father again was a reminder for Tala that he had all these responsibilities and he'd realised the error of his ways and had decided to drastically change?

Yeah.

Maybe when pigs can fly.

A growl escaped him as he picked up the phone again, knowing he'd kick himself after for this, as what he was about to do just screamed desperate, but before he could talk himself out of it the phone was up to his ear and the dial tone was ringing out... and ringing.. and ringing...

'_I'm sorry, the person you are calling can't answer at this time. Please try again later.'_

REALLY?!

He'd only ever called him once. Two times max.

One had been to do with the yard, the other to rip him a new one when he found out he wasn't only married, but had a kid too.

So considering that track record, Kai could understand why he wasn't picking up.. But still!

Tala was the one that wanted to continue this! Gave him all that spiel in the restaurant bathroom!

He should be jumping at the chance to see him again!

Bringing the phone back down he opened the text thread and beside himself messaged again.

[Where are you?]

He furiously pounded on the touch screen and poured himself another shots worth of whiskey once he'd sent it, only to choke on the liquid a few moments later as his phone pinged in his hand.

[T: Oh. Fancy hearing from u. I'm busy. Y?]

Clearing his throat, the after burn of the alcohol still on his throat Kai frowned to his phone before quickly replying. Like hell he was busy!

[I want you to come over.]

[T: Oh? Need some hedges trimmed?] Came the slightly delayed reply.

A scoff escaped him paired with an eye roll, the agitated bounce in his leg coming to a pause whilst he typed.

[Sure. Are you free or not?]

[T: Just said I was busy. Wat u want?]

[You.]

His response was instant. Shameless almost.

He'd never cared what Tala had thought of him before so why start now? He knew what he was to him, and vice versa.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Kai paced back and forth, the rage within him only building, everything that had just transpired on his driveway replaying, over and over.

He poured himself another shots worth.

He just wanted whatever he was feeling to go away..

This hurt.

It was one thing being told Ray had fucked her in the first place.

Another him admitting that there'd been feeling behind it.

But now he was going to father a child?

Whilst Kai's coping mechanisms were far from healthy, it was the only way he knew how to deal with such anguish.

It wasn't for a good minute or two before his phone pinged again with another message, nearly making a rut in the floor, clutching to his empty glass before he came to a sudden halt.

[T: Well isn't this a nice surprise. 2 wks and you cum crawling back to me.]

He read it, that wasn't the answer he wanted and before he set his glass back down on the counter, fingers going back to mashing his screen he was hit with another message.

[T: Give me 1 good reason y I should.]

Kai's jaw clenched, his thumb hovering over the keypad for a moment entertaining the idea of playing along but he was in no mood for his usual games.

[Really Tal? What do you want me to do, beg?]

The reply came back faster than all the others this time.

[T: Yes.]

Kai huffed a laugh though wasn't finding any of this remotely amusing.

This day can just fuck right off.

Bet Ray didn't have to beg to get on top of _that_.

Fine though.

[Please.]

It took a few more minutes before the reply came again, whatever Tala was doing better as hell be important right now to keep him waiting like this.

[T: B there in 10.]

Kai's heart started racing even more than it already was as his eyes darted to the clock.

That gave them a few hours before Ray was due to come home - perfect.

Can get his fill and then when Tala was long gone he can tell him allllll the good news.

Though.. what was going to happen after that he wasn't sure...

[Doors open.]

[T: Not the only thing that's going 2 b open ;) ]

It had been thirteen minutes and forty six seconds when his front door was pushed open.

Not that he'd been counting or anything...

Instantly easing himself up from his seat on the couch when he caught sight of the flaming hair, Kai threw back the remainder of whatever number whiskey he was on now and chucked the glass amongst the other shattered shards of what was his coffee table in the centre of the room. Clearly not giving a fuck for anyone or anything anymore the redhead noticed.

He tensed slightly at the sound, his head snapping to catch a mere glimpse of the scene of chaos in the living room, throwing over a look confusion before hesitantly closing the front door behind him.

What the actual fuck has he just walked into?

Before he could even try and put two and two together or even think about high tailing it back out of there the man of the house was with him in the hall and spouting out demands.

"Upstairs, now." Kai ordered with a slack point to the steps opposite.

Red brows furrowed again as he looked him up and down, wondering who the hell he thought he was talking to and took a step back as his alcohol infused breath assaulted him.

"Ever heard of a breath mint, or a _please_? What, no kiss and 'welcome home darling'?"

"Don't fucking start with me." Kai sent with an exasperated sigh, not even caring for the bite in Tala's tone. "You know why you're here so cut the shit. Go."

Tilting his head to the stairs again the redhead just sent him another look.

"How drunk are you?" He seemed to tut, wasn't even three in the afternoon yet and he was shit faced. "What happened, Kai?"

He received a dark laugh in response and watched as a palm came up to the others forehead before sliding down his face.

"Do not. Pretend to care Tala. _Seriously_." Kai bit before pushing past him and stepping up on to the first step. "I don't need some shoulder to cry on, I need you to get up these stairs and just fuck me, k? That's it. Plain and simple. Now I suggest you follow me."

Blue eyes rolled before he lunged after him to grab his wrist, stopping his start on storming up to the bedroom.

"Woahhh woah alright, okay, but come on now... I'm into a little craziness Kai but _this_ is _no_ way to get me hard." He reeled off, huffing a laugh and having another slightly nervous glance to the living room. "Clearly some shit's happened here so spill. You after the whole angry sex thing or something?"

"Sure, let's go with that." Kai dully replied pulling his wrist from out of his grip and leaving him with no time to object further as he started on his ascend of the stairs.

A sigh escaped him as he watched him go, the view of his ass not enough to stop him taking a good look at the broken furniture and glass all over the floor in the room adjacent.

Least he was the one driving, he shuddered to think what kind of damage Kai would do to himself in his state right now.

Slowly he followed up after him, treading almost carefully to the familiar bedroom and shut the door behind him.

Sure, he didn't care, but after two weeks of being ghosted he deserved _something_..

Kai reached for the hem of his own shirt and pulled it off over his head, dropping it carelessly on the floor before setting himself down on the bed to watch Tala enter and take in his surroundings the same way he'd done before; Blue eyes taking in the display of skin though his usual smirk never appeared.

Where was the chase?

He liked the chase...

"Soo care to share with the class now? Is there a particular reason why you're so eager?"

Kai rolled his eyes, letting his head fall back as he groaned out in frustration.

"Oh my goddd, why are you fucking questioning it?! You wanted to do this did you not? So here we are!"

Tala shrugged his shoulders, unfazed by the increased volume as he licked the front of his teeth, "Been two weeks. Figured you were living it up with the cat, so what gives now? Where is he?" He asked, stepping more into the room and pulling off his own shirt as he went.

Kai watched him, staring up as he leant back on his elbows and exhaled a sigh through his nose.

"Just drop it. Does it matter? Are you really complaining right now?"

Every time Tala had tried to get in his pants previously he'd played hard to get, trying to convince himself he was a decent person. Whatever little morals he still possessed momentarily getting in the way before allowing it all to happen anyway.

But now, when he was practically offering it on a plate, he questions it?

"Uh... Yeah?" Tala mocked back, "Two weeks Kai. Sure, we're not in _love_ or anything sappy like that, but you didn't even call to say hi... Hurt my feelings..." He fake pouted and stopped near the edge of the bed, taking in the sight before him and put his hands to his hips.

Kai sat himself up, hands immediately going to touch him as he stood close enough, holding either side of him and caressing his skin as he placed kisses on his bare stomach.

"Well let me make it up to you.." He purred between kisses, skin erupting in goosebumps when Tala's hand raked through his hair.

"I get it, you want your itch scratched Kai and clearly _I'm_ the only one who can..." He'd adopted the same alluring tone before tightening his grip on slate locks and shoving him off of him back onto the bed.

"..But I want to know why."

Kai let out a noise as his back abruptly connected with the sheets. Sending Tala a look as he clicked his tongue, easing himself back up onto his elbows.

Why couldn't people just drop shit when he asked?!

"Just had a bad day alright? Fuck, you missed me that much or something?" He redirected. "Is your life that dull?"

"Oh, far from it." Tala waved off his comment, sighing through his nose as he realized he wasn't going to get what he wanted in an answer and figured he'd just get to what he came here for.

Holding Kai's eyes with his, he stepped closer, edging between his legs as his hands moved to his zipper and button, slowly pulling it down and set himself free.

A mischievous glint appeared in his eyes, paired with a faint smirk as Kai watched the zipper come undone.

This was more like it..

"Well then," The redhead continued in a seductive tone, hand slowly working himself to get hard and ready, "Without a proper answer on why you decided to kick me to the curb, I guess all you can do is come here and make it up to me..."

Pushing himself back up off the sheets again Kai obliged, reaching across, grabbing at Tala's hips and roughly pulled both his jeans and boxers lower down his thighs.

Taking a glance back up to meet hungry blue eyes he licked his lips before responding in the same manner.

"I'll see what I can do..."

Brushing Tala's hand off himself, he replaced it with his own firm grip and started to work him slowly, feeling the muscle twitch and become solid almost instantly with his touch.

Tala licked his lips as he looked down to him, his free hand now back to running through slate hair before reaching to the darker strands on the back of Kai's head, inching himself closer to his goal.

Taking the not so subtle hint, Kai's lips parted as the tip of his cock inched closer to him, slipping out his tongue he circled around it before easing down, taking another glance up to lock with the icy orbs he hated to love so much.

Tala let out a deep growl, hands closing to a fist in his dark hair as the warm, wet mouth worked him.

"Mmm.. good boy.." He purred as he pushed his head a little to guide how he wanted it.

He'd never admit to it but he had missed the miserable prick in some twisted sort of way. He knew how to scratch his itch and vice versa.

Why else would he have practically asked 'how high' when Kai had text him to jump?

Truth be told seeing his name appear on his screen made him feel like a giddy teenager. Excitement swirling through him over the fact _he _had messaged him first.

He pushed on his head harder to pick up the pace, both wanting to let his eyes screw shut while at the same time not wanting to miss the visual feast for a second.

Soaking up the praise from him Kai continued sucking him towards heaven, easing further and further down his shaft with every bob of his head.

At the firm possessive grip in his hair he let out a throaty moan that vibrated up Tala's length causing a shiver up his spine and Kai's own pants to feel a size too small now.

Deeming that enough of warm up for him he pulled himself back, releasing the cock from his mouth with a pop, a mixed trail of saliva and pre-cum still connecting them.

"Pretty sure I'm the one that's had the shit day here.." He dully said wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Or what, did you think I ordered you here just for your own pleasure?"

Tala panted a little as his smirk came back, his fair hand connecting with the others bare chest and pushing his back onto the sheets.

Kicking off his pants and underwear completely before he pounced, he grabbed the top of Kai's pants and yanked at them roughly. Wrestling them off along with his boxers and tossing them aside.

With him now stripped and just how he liked him, he dropped to his knees, pushing his legs back and spreading them.

"Let's not forget I give the orders here.." He growled as he smacked the side of his ass, running his tongue up his length, "And I'm pretty sure you know what happens when you sass me."

Kai bit back his own smirk as he lay there, shivering slightly as his tongue finally made contact with his, up to press, rudely ignored cock.

He was more than aware of all of Tala's moves by now. More than familiar with his arrogant spiel. Though, like a child, he'd be lying if he said he didn't mind re-watching this same movie, over and over.

"Hmm.. might have to remind me?"

Tala huffed a laugh, withdrawing the little tongue that was touching him.

Very well.. Bad boys didn't get treats.

He brought himself up, his large, strong hands gripping Kai's hips and using the mattress to bounce him, manhandling him hard enough to flip him. He roughly pulled his hips up to bring him on to his knees and shoved his face down in to the bed before leaving him to get the lube.

"Now you stay right there.."

Kai's gut knotted with excitement as he lifted his head back up from the bed sheets to watch Tala saunter over to the stash drawer. Doing exactly as he'd been told he stayed put on his knees, his ass up in the air as his eyes followed him around the room.

"Yes sir.."

Tala turned around and frowned.

"That means head down." He snapped sternly.

Crimson eyes rolled in response before silently obeying and resting his head back down into the covers, though kept peeking up every so often to catch a cheeky glimpse of him.

Tala meandered back slowly, admiring the view and running a long finger gently down the line of his spine as he made his way back down to the business end.

He grinned as he saw the goosebumps raise and the muscles beneath his pale skin twitch. He was going to make him beg 'til his cock was purple. Teach him a lesson..

He leisurely lowered himself down, giving the fleshy part of his round ass a rough and sharp smack, just cause he was being a dick.

Kai gasped out as the palm made contact with his skin, it reddening instantly.

"Stop teasing.." He growled as he sent a glare to him over his shoulder.

Tala narrowed his eyes, face hardening as he threw another one in almost the same spot.

"Head down!"

Kai hissed, sending him another look before setting his head back down.

"Prick.." he mumbled into the cotton sheets.

He was starting to think twice about inviting him over now..

"Ahh you love it.. that's why you keep wanting more, don't you _babe_?" He said teasingly as he spread him wide enough to let his tongue lap just as teasing while his hand gently reached between his legs an stroked.

Where was the lie though?

As much as Tala pissed him off, (_and he really pissed him off), _found none of his jokes even remotely funny, and thought he was a complete dickhead, he did, he kept on going back for more.

His snake like hands knowing exactly what to do and where to go.

He'd been the first one to cross his mind the moment he'd slammed the door in Mariah's face knowing it was only _he_ that could even begin to make him feel better.

And with his hands gripped around and working him he had no regrets.

A muffled moan escaped into the sheets and the redhead's cock twitched at the sound.

That was better...

He continued to keep a loose and gentle hold, running the pad of his thumb over the tip while his own tongue kept working.

Kai was desperate for more, but didn't dare lift his head up for fear of another swift smack on the same reddened area of his ass.

Writhing under his touch he lurched his hips forward, gagging for more contact from the wolf's hand.

Feeling him try and get more friction, Tala pulled his hand away completely, hearing a slight whimper at the loss of contact but he'd told him...

He made the rules.. he called the shots..

With a click, the cap of the lube popped open, coating his fingers he gently slipped one inside him, feeling the other tense up immediately at the intrusion before relaxing.

Finally they were getting down to business.

Another moan slipped out of him as Kai pushed back onto his finger, taking it down to his knuckle.

"Ooooh you want it bad huh?" Tala panted feeling himself riling.

He lived for reducing him to this.

Making such a tall man buckle in need for him.

"Mhmm.." Kai hummed out as he nodded as best he could with his head down. "Please.." he added in a shameless breath, lifting up just high enough to have his words heard.

Tala bit his lip and slipped in another finger, getting him good and ready while wanting him to beg for more.

"Ah fuck.." Came the moan as Kai relaxed, getting used to the feeling quickly. "Come on Tal.." He pleaded, rocking his hips back.

At hearing his name coming out like it did and his hips move to fuck himself on his fingers, even he'd had enough of the games.

He eased out his fingers, dribbling lube over himself to get it good and greased before he placed his tip at his desperate hole, taking hold of his hips as he quickly eased himself in.

Once he was buried, his hips went relentlessly. Desperate to hear him again.

With a stupid grin on Ray's face, he pulled up in to the drive to his home. Not taking in the car that was parked on the side of the road out front, too excited to really care what was really around him to pay attention right now.

It'd been a while since he felt this way coming home, and rightfully so, but there was an extra dash of it running through his veins.

He was home early! As a surprise.

Sure, lying and feigning sickness just so he could was bad, but it wasn't completely a lie.

His ass was still sore, legs still a little weak from being in the air (even if it had been a few hours since the last time they were up there and going numb.) Oh, and the hickeys between his thighs kept rubbing on his pant legs, so that hurt every time he walked.

But it was fine, he was home now and ready to do it all over again. This time with no distractions of work or therapy sessions.

They had each other all to themselves till they tired or broke the bed, whichever came first..

Meanwhile Kai was already in bliss.

His shameless moans continuing to tear through his throat so loud neither he nor Tala heard the key get turned in the front door.

_"Fuuck_ yes.." he praised as he threw his hips back to meet and smack with the redhead's.

This is what he wanted, what he _needed._

Drink and fuck the pain away.

It had worked fine for him before.

Before Ray. Before any of this.

With a slight bounce in his step, stupid smile plastered on his face, it all drained the second Ray got the front door opened and took in the damage to his living room.

His heart kicked up fast in his chest at the glass scattered all over the floor, the coffee table broken and shattered in lumps of wood and glass.

What the hell happened in here?! It looked like a tornado had whirled through. Or worse, they'd been robbed.

His heart leapt in his throat as the idea planted itself in his head, worry coursing through him at where Kai might be and if he was hurt. Or worse.

Only for those thoughts to get washed and drained out of him as his ears perked at a noise coming from up the stairs. Not only did his heart continue to race to the point it was painful, his face drained of any color and he swallowed the bile he felt rising up.

Carefully, as if he wasn't sure this was what he wanted to do right now, he unsteadily made his way up the stairs. Having to grip and hold the railing as his knees threatened to buckle out from under his weight.

Every step up closer to the top, the noises getting louder but at the same time seeming to drown out around him like his head was stuck in a bucket of water, he finally made it to the top and to his closed bedroom door.

He was shaking, hard, fighting down the bile best he could as his stomach tightened and twisted in knots. The moans of ecstasy raging behind the door, followed by the sound of the headboard smacking into the wall.

This had to be a dream, a sick, sick twisted dream.

With a small sweat on his skin he grabbed at the door handle, still trembling uncontrollably and shoved his way in.

Eyes wide and getting a thick film of tears in them as his mouth didn't know what to do, that bile he kept fighting down near enough shooting out of him as he stood there and watched Kai getting it rammed up his ass and howling like he couldn't get enough of it.

Seeing the door open in his peripheral vision, Kai's half lidded eyes shot wide open and his head snapped towards it so fast it almost hurt.

"R-RAY?!"

Whilst the whole point of this was to get back at him, was his twisted idea of some sort of revenge, he'd never have wanted him to have front row seats to it. Would never have wanted him to witness first hand what he was capable of doing to a person.

Like flicking off a switch, Tala had stopped mid thrust, heart and erection vanishing completely as he too snapped his gaze, open mouthed to the other male.

Ooooooh shit...

Immediately Kai launched himself forward, grabbing at the bed sheets to cover himself, trying to regain _some_ of his dignity that he had royally lost just now whilst Tala stood at the edge of the bed, covering his wilting self with his hands.

He should probably just keep his mouth shut...

Ray's eyes darted to the familiar redhead, Trevor or Travis, who the fuck cared about his name right now and then to Kai and back again a few times like a ping-pong ball.

This hurt, in more ways than one. He wanted to throw his fist into something, wanted to crumble to his knees and cry and puke on top of screaming till his lungs were sore.

By some miracle he kept standing though, just looking like he was taking a screen shot of it all before he finally snapped to.

"Oh no, don't stop on my fucking account or anything, wouldn't want to ruin this!" He spat, gesturing out at the two of them while trying to hide his body shaking harder.

He wanted to wake up, wanted it something desperately, but had a feeling this was reality with no way of doing so.

Tala took a glance over to Kai who looked even more paler than usual before shifting where he stood. Taking a swift peek down at himself to ensure his goods were well and truly covered behind his hands.

"Bit late for that to be honest.."

Ray felt his eye twitch as his vision constricted, the sick feeling had being replaced by the burning anger that had been mixed in there.

He was going to rip his dick off and shove it in a grinder!

"Oh?!" He spat again sarcastically, this time shaking from the pent up rage as his claws dug into the palms of his hands.

"My sincerest _apologies_ then!" His voice strained, never having yelled like that before in his life.

Kai's stomach twisted and his whole body noticeable tensed up once the sound had made it to his ears. He'd never heard Ray's voice reach such notes, crack with such pain, never even during all of their arguments prior to this. Never knew he possessed such rage... and he'd caused it..

Tala internally hit himself. So much for keeping his mouth shut.

"I should.. probably just leave you guys to it..." he said in a small voice as he scanned the bedroom floor for his pants.

Kai sent a look to him, still clutching at the bed sheets, before crimson eyes dared to look over at gold.

A whole mix of emotions polluting his insides though he didn't have a single word for him right now.

He just stared blankly at him. Knew an apology was sat on his tongue, but then, was he sorry?

If he hadn't have got the stupid bitch pregnant they wouldn't be in the predicament they were now.

So whatever pain he was feeling.. Ray had brought it upon himself..

A low feral sounding growl rumbled through Ray's chest, stepping away from the door as he watched Taylor pick up his clothes off _his_ bedroom floor, in _his_ house!

He told himself to bite his tongue, but that anger seeping through his pores made his mouth open again.

"Wonder what your _wife_ thinks of you screwing someone else behind her back." He hissed out with another growl.

Tala let out a small chuckle.

"Well, probably the same thing Kai thought when he found out about you and the pink haired chick you went to China for." He smugly clapped back without hesitation.

He had no right to be throwing sass right now, but he and Bianca it would seem were the _least_ of this guy's worries..

Kai shifted as he silently looked between the two of them, visions of a throw down fixing to happen in his bedroom and not the kind he'd want to join in with.

And he thought the double date was awkward.. wooow this was nothing compared to that.

He'd do that date ten times over if it meant he could erase all this now.

"Excuse me?" Ray asked as his brow twitched more furiously, his pupils disappearing in the color of his eyes they got so thin.

They shot towards Kai, stupid and silent on the bed as his fingers itched to him more than Todd at the moment.

He talked about _that_, with _this_ fucking prick?!

"You have five seconds to get the _FUCK_ OUT OF MY HOUSE!" His already strained voice screamed and strained more.

Pulling up his zipper and casually shoving his shirt over his head another chuckle escaped the redhead.

"Didn't no one ever tell you that people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones?"

Whilst Tala's face was laced with false innocence, his tone was dripping in arrogance as he sauntered passed him heading for the bedroom door, daring to continue taunting as he did. "We ain't all that different kid, so don't even _try_ it with the guilt trip."

Kai swallowed to relieve his dried up throat as he apprehensively watched the other two stare each other down.

"Just do as he says Tala.." He warned. "Go.."

Tala huffed another laugh, keeping icy blue locked with dulled amber.

"Yeah yeah I'm going... Have fun figuring out whatever the fuck this is." He scoffed gesturing between the two of them before opening up the bedroom door.

"You've got my number." He cheekily added with a click of his tongue before leaving, the sound of the front door opening and closing several seconds later.

The sound of the front door closing was just another dull and drowned out noise that still somehow rang in his ears, before Ray felt a sudden punch to the gut.

Tala...

That was his name... That was the same broken off noise Kai had made their night home from the restaurant.

A hand clapped up over his mouth, trying to breathe through it all again now that he didn't have to stand strong in front of _Tala_.

His feet took him back until he was pressed up against the wall of the bedroom, hand still over his mouth as his eyes welled up harder.

Kai still didn't have the words for him, yet had a whole lot to say at the same time.

So many questions... A lot of explanations, and a bucket full of colourful language.

Considering that Mariah had come here so desperate to speak to him he could only assume that Ray had no clue at all. Or maybe he did and it was all just some fucked up plan for him to find out about the two of them..

No he wasn't thinking straight.. though couldn't blame any of it on the alcohol now as the second that bedroom door had opened he'd sobered up instantly.

Was it nerves? Lord knows he was riddled with them right now, and he knew he didn't find any of this funny, but a small laugh dared to escape his throat.

He could understand why Ray was fixing to cry right now, but surely the only one who should be feeling broken inside was him.

The laugh that rolled out of Kai dried his barely falling tears, hand coming away from his mouth as he once more just stared at him in silence.

This had to be a sick twisted and royally fucked up dream now, it had to be... He wished it was.

Or, this was just Kai's way of punishing him for his transgressions. And then getting a good kick out of it after practically kicking him in the nuts.

"This is funny, is it?" His voice dipped out eerily, a headache beginning to settle in the side of his head.

Though currently he wasn't sure if was from the events, the constant backwards and forwards of emotions running rampant inside him, or that his eyes were straining from being slit for as long as they were now.

Either way, it didn't help any of those things as he kept himself against the wall for support and stared down his _lover_ still sat on the bed.

"What. The. FUCK, KAI?!" He screamed, releasing some of his pent up anger out on the wall behind him as his fist came back and slammed into it.

The remains of the others faint smile diminished as if all that had just happened had been drip feeding into him and it had just slowly sunk in that this was in fact his reality.

Maybe he was losing his fucking mind, maybe that's what that laugh was because he knew it had no reason to have emitted from him at a moment like this.

Kai just sent him a shrug, his eyes glazing over as he stared down at the sheets in front of him.

"I.." He sighed out the rest of his breath, before looking up to him and shrugging again.

What did he want him to say?

Welcome home? Surprise?

He'd been caught red handed, an apology wasn't exactly going to cut it.

Oh, I'm sorry you had to witness another man balls deep in your boyfriend but hey at least I didn't knock someone up?

Would that cut it? He thought not..

"I don't know what to tell you." He plainly sent him.

Ray's stomach curled, his fist going back into the wall behind him with a sickening crack that was more than likely a bone popping instead of paint chipping.

"How long?!" It was good enough place to start as any, not that it would matter in the grand scheme of things.

Like he'd read his mind Kai just sent him a dull look.

"Does it matter?"

Ray's bottom lip quivered, his body shaking again as he couldn't hold back his tears anymore.

No, and yes. It was hard to really explain it. But he wanted answers, even if they'd just hurt him worse.

"Back at the restaurant..." He started, voice scratchy from screaming and yelling so much.

"You weren't outside... You were with-with him..." He choked out.

Even if he hadn't seen it, it was like he could now. And he wished he didn't.

Kai's gaze lowered.

Whilst a part of him had no regard for Ray's feelings right now, the other still wanted to protect him with his life.

Ray wasn't stupid though, and having seen that just now, it was only a matter of time before everything else would click in to place. Every piece of this fucked up puzzle slowly being completed as he worked it all out.

Kai ran his tongue over his teeth then pressed his lips together.

Was no point even lying now at this point. He'd already lost him in his eyes so may as well just be transparent. Like he'd been with Dr Lange earlier, give him complete honesty.

"Yeah.. I was.."

Like he knew it would, despite wanting to hear it and have it confirmed, Ray lost his breath for a second as another punch to the gut shot right through him.

He couldn't hold it in anymore, running to the trash can by the door and hurled.

Spitting and sputtering, his eyes burning as everything came out in a gush, he felt more winded once it calmed, though couldn't find it in himself to stand anymore.

Pushing the can away from him, but not out of reach in case he needed it, he slumped to the floor and put his fingers through his hair tightly.

"Why...?" He heaved in a breath, shaking his head as his claws dug into his scalp before looking back up at the bed.

"WHY?!"

Kai's own eyes started to water.

What was left of his own broken heart shattering further at seeing him like this, but he wasn't the only one hurting here.

"Really? Do you really have to ask Ray? After _everything_, you _really_ have to fucking ask _why_?!"

Like a fire had been lit under his own ass Kai's voice started to soar, building in volume and gaining bite.

That dark part of him taking over, loving the pain exuding from the other on the floor, and he still had another card to play.

Still had that ace up his sleeve that would just be yet more fuel on this raging fire.

Though he didn't even know how to tell him.

Didn't even know how to bring it up.

The news just sitting on the tip of his tongue, just waiting for the right moment to snap.

"One time Kai! One time for me while you've been doing this behind my back _constantly_!" Ray argued back with his slowly dying voice.

"And with a man who is married with two kids no less! You want to throw stones here? Really?!"

The same rage that ran through him earlier was beginning to flare back up again not appreciating where Ray was trying to go with this.

He wants to talk about stones? He had a fucking boulder for this guy.

"Like _that_ fucking matters Ray!" Kai spat referring to Tala's personal home life.

Whilst it hadn't sat right with him the moment he'd found out himself it still hadn't stopped him. Hadn't stopped either of them from doing what they did because simply neither of them thought about it.

When they were deep in their dirty episodes Tala wasn't husband, father of two, he was that young and wild rogue that no one would ever take home to meet their parents, only the bedroom and he was fine with that.

Kai too wasn't the hard faced big successful boss man in control of everything and settled with partner and long time friend.

No.

He was back to that free bird that did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted and with _whoever_ he wanted.

No control, no responsibilities.

Their _real_ lives never came in to it because it was their _real_ lives they were trying to escape from.

During that hour of no inhibitions the two had literally swapped roles.

Kai relinquished his dominance whereas Tala gained it.

The two of them being so wrong for each other yet so right in another life.

"Oh I'm sorry, so your _one_ _time_ just gets erased does it? Doesn't matter? Makes perfect sense! Let's all just pin this whole fucking thing on Kai because sweet and innocent little Ray only did it the once! Is that how it is?! Huh?!"

Yes, he'd done some fucked up shit.

Yes he _continues_ to do fucked up shit.

But why was he _always_ the bad guy?

Regardless of what Lange had said, this whole thing really was getting put on his shoulders. He was getting the blame for everything. _He_ was being considered the cause of this mess. Not Ray.

Not _precious_ _fucking_ Ray.

So what that he fucked his childhood sweetheart whom he still had feelings for AND GOT PREGNANT.

Kai was the only bad guy here!

"_Don't_ try fucking pin this on me Ray. YOU DO NOT GET TO PIN THIS ON ME!" He screamed back at him pointing his finger to his bare chest. Everything that had ever been bottled up inside of him spewing between these four walls now.

He will _not_ get the blame for simply reacting to Ray's bullshit!

"At least I can call mine a mistake! Yours was a _choice_!" Ray spat back, "What, didn't get enough this morning so thought 'hey, why not?' After _everything_ we have been doing to try and fix this! What more do you want from me?!

"I apologized, profusely for it, if I could I'd take it back! But no! That wasn't good enough for you! Had to go and shove it in my face like this instead of just being normal and kicking me out instead." He took a breath, though it did neither calm him or give him any decent air in his burning lungs.

"No, that would have been the easy way. Why not just drive in a knife, really get him good and _right_. Where. It. Fucking hurts!" He spat again, sarcasm dripping out of him completely as he was close to snapping something.

"This what you wanted?! Revenge, pay back? Any more punishments you have lined up and ready to go for me here?!"

Kai's lip wobbled at the relentless onslaught of words, his ears well and truly ringing now.

Ignoring the lone tear that had just trickled down his fair cheek, he was raging.

"Was it a mistake though Ray? Was it? Because the _huge_, big fucking difference here is that I don't actually give a _shit_ about that guy." He sneered, gesturing outwards.

"Whereas _you!_" He let out a dark laugh. "Oh, what was it you said? 'I'll _always_ have feelings for her.''" He mocked in a voice that sounded nothing like the male standing opposite, looking far from amused.

"So humour me and tell me how the _fuck_ it was a mistake Ray when it was probably _everything_ you fucking wanted and _had_ been wanting again for a while!?"

It was then Kai's lip curled into a twisted smirk as his last sentence seemed to linger with him for a moment.

What he'd been wanting for a while..

Wasn't the only thing he'd been wanting.. maybe now was the time to let him know he was getting it.

"I didn't want it!" Ray cried back.

After having gone and pushed the memory as far down as he could, it suddenly sprung forth like a giant tidal wave and smacked into him.

"Not at first! I tried to stop it, all of it." He shook his head, legs curling up to his chest as he grabbed his hair again.

What would it matter now to try and plead his case, continue to keep begging for forgiveness.

He couldn't take it back, and it haunted him to this day what he'd done.

But the truth was, he had tried to push her away. Before, during, and only succeeded once the sin had already been committed.

Why? He didn't love her, he loved Kai. Even told her that and then she turned around and poisoned his thoughts again.

_"And if he loved you, you wouldn't be here."_ She had said, and at that time he had agreed.

If Kai loved him he wouldn't have been there to start with, and not certainly where they currently were now.

Maybe they just didn't love each other as much as they thought they did anymore.

Kai huffed another laugh.

Like he hadn't heard this bullshit before.

"Well maybe you should have tried a little harder in stopping it because that alleged _'mistake..'_" He signed with his fingers, "Is going to now haunt you for the rest of your fucking life.."

Kai's tone was dark now, easing himself up out of the sheets, he snatched at his clothes and started to dress himself having it in mind that as soon as he drops this bomb he'd be the first one out of here.

"Question." He started again, pulling on his jeans. "Did a particular someone happen to visit you at work yesterday?"

Ray's blood ran cold, heavy head lifting only to nod slowly.

"And I kicked her away, slammed the door in her face."

"Ah.. well you see that's the funny thing with mangy cats, if they're turned away they just show up some place else.."

Pulling his shirt over his head Kai then sat himself down on the edge of the bed and looked down at the other on the floor.

".. Like here."

Ray just stared at him, waiting for the rest while dreading it at the same time.

Why?! Why didn't she just get the fucking hint and leave him be?!

For some reason he couldn't even ask Kai why she'd shown up, part of him not wanting to know while the other screaming in his head for Kai to just hurry up.

None of this was going to end well, he knew that, but he could hardly prepare himself for it right now.

Seeing the expression on his face Kai's own remained deadpan, again, one half relishing the pain this was going to bring him, the other reluctant to send him the words and he knew the moment they were uttered, there'd be no coming back from this.

"She's pregnant."

Ray continued to stare, the words fizzing in and out of his hearing as they settled into his head before he slowly shook it.

That wasn't... It couldn't... No...

"No... No..." He continued to shake his head, claws again digging into his hair.

"No! She said she was on birth control!" He snapped at no one in particular, that giant tidal wave coming back and smacking into him.

Sure, birth control failed. But had it just been a lie? It wasn't like he asked her to prove it to him.

Then there was the issue of him trying to get her off before the end, and she had him pinned and continued to keep going before it was too late.

His heart stopped momentarily as his tear stained face paled.

It had been a trap... All along...

Kai just sent him a look.

"Oh? You had a decent enough conversation beforehand then? Most thought out mistake in history this one Ray." His words sagged with sarcasm.

Ray shook his head again, "That's not what happened..." But why waste his words anymore?

Kai got his revenge. He dug himself a grave that he couldn't get out of. What more was there left to do here?

"I saw in literal black and white Ray what happened.. The evidence of what happened shoved in my damn face before she then skipped back down the fucking driveway!"

It was then Kai's voice cracked on him, crimson glistening further and his lower lip wobbled, Ray catching sight of it before he'd quickly turned his face away from him.

"You always did want kids so, congratulations, now you have one..."

Ray shook his head again, it about the only thing he could do right now as his world tilted upside down and spun.

What had he done?!

He couldn't even form words right now, his head feeling like it was filled with static where he sat and felt sick to his stomach all over again.

He couldn't even apologize again, what would be the point? It didn't matter how sorry he was, wouldn't matter how many times he got down on his knees and begged, at this point he didn't even deserve a sliver of Kai's forgiveness.

It didn't take away the sting for what he'd just learned, nor did it justify it any either, but how could he keep fighting with him now?

They were one for... However many on Kai's side.

He weakly lifted his head, silent tears streaming down as he locked eyes with him.

"When did it start?" That was all he wanted to know, why he still didn't know but wanted to hear it. Hammer in the last nail in the coffin.

Kai broke his gaze off from him as he thought.

When _did_ it start?

Debatable..

Whereas some considered flirtatious messages an affair, some didn't consider it one until things became physical.

Tala had been fixing for it since he'd first sent over payment for his work in the yard. The two of them texted back and forth most of the night whilst Ray was out living it up with _her_.

So if it was then... Hell, almost two months ago?

Nah. It had been harmless then. He'd just brushed him off, genuinely.

Sure he might have gawked at his picture a little too long, but he was only human.

There was the night at the club when he'd met up with the team...

Again debatable.

He couldn't remember shit.. Had things gotten physical then?

He was trashed...

There was an instance he was sure about though... that was the only truthful answer he could give him and he was sure this was going to sting the most.

".. the night I dropped you off at the airport.."

Ray winced a little once Kai finally spoke, taking in a heavier breath as he eased himself up on his unsteady feet.

So then what? First time wasn't revenge, and Kai said he didn't care about Tala, so then why? Why start it at all?

Did he even want to know? What would the point in knowing do anyways?

His head was too cloudy to care either way, hand itching to lift and smack as hard as he could as he stood in front of him as his tears continued to roll down his face, though pulled back before he could.

It wasn't worth it. None of this was.

Even with the hurt and sting at Kai's admission that he'd gone and stepped out of line first, he did his best to hold himself up higher than he thought possible.

"I'll get my stuff tomorrow when you're at work." Was all he said, damning how scratchy his voice box still was but wasn't all that surprised with how much he'd been screaming.

Kai took a glance up to him once Ray had rose to his feet before quickly looking away from him again.

Well that was it. He'd admitted it.

Finally confessed it all to him though he didn't feel like any form of weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

He still felt pinned down. Swamped with guilt, anger, pain..

Even though he was feeling so much he still felt empty. Numb almost.

He just nodded to him. He had nothing else to say to him..

There was nothing else _to_ say.

They were done. Over.

Finished.


	21. Running On Empty

A/N: What a mess that last chapter was... did ya all like it? :)

Just going to get straight to it as I'm sure you're all dying to know what happens next.

As always thanks to everyone following/reviewing etc. Feel like I say this a lot but it really does make my day to know that people are enjoying this. So if you are reading along and have never commented please do! Or inbox me! Don't be a stranger. (:

Also thanks to Lux for helping with this and having a good ol' argument with me to close.

Let's get to it shall we?

Enjoy!

K~

* * *

Chapter 21 - Running on Empty

He'd been awake all night.

Usually bright golden eyes were glazed over, blood shot and felt sore from the relentless tears and lack of sleep.

It had been odd laying there in unfamiliar surroundings. Not only in a house that wasn't his own, but a different room, a different bed, cold and alone.

His mind plagued with both a million and one thoughts yet at the same time completely blank.

His heart experiencing whole new levels of emotion, yet at the same time not feeling a damn thing.

Overall he just felt numb, lost, and empty.

"You sure you don't want me to come with you bud?" Tyson cautiously offered again, holding onto his coffee mug and looking down to his friend that was currently tying his shoe laces in the hall. "Might make things easier having someone else there? Diffuse the tension or somethin'?"

Ray lazily waved him off, rising to his feet and reaching up for his denim jacket on the coat hook by the door. He knew Tyson was coming from a good place here but he really didn't need to worry.

"He's not even going to be home Ty so I'll be fine. Thank you though..." His tone radiated defeat and his movements were slow and lethargic as he shoved his arms through the sleeves.

Ray had also spoken to Mariah last night under sufferance. (Because the breakup of his long term relationship wasn't enough, he had her to contend with also.)

Was perhaps the most awkward phone call he'd had in his life but he'd had to have it whether he wanted to or not.

Like Tyson had advised him, he couldn't avoid her forever knowing what was growing inside of her. He had to just grow up, rip off the band aid and deal with the consequences of his actions like a man. Thankfully Ray had had him there for emotional support and to hold his hand but it still didn't take away the sting from how fucked everything was.

Wasn't much of a surprise that sleep had evaded him completely...

After walking out yesterday and aimlessly driving around for a while he'd head over to Tyson's place. Not really knowing where else to go or what else to even do.

Half of him wanting Kai to have made _some _effort to at least try and stop him from leaving but the other was pleased he'd just silently let him go.

What more was there to say? To do?

It was clear what they once had was unsalvageable so they had to just leave it in the trash where it clearly belonged...

Looking back on it Ray did feel bad for putting Tyson through what he had done yesterday, having just turned up at his door completely out of the blue and hysterical; chest almost violently heaving in and out on him as he tried to explain what had happened or why he was even there in the first place through shuddering breaths.

Whilst he'd tried, Tyson wasn't following the frantic rambles at all but it was clear something major had happened.

He'd never seen Ray in such an emotional state.

Almost dumbly in his shock, all Tyson could do was invite him into the house, lead him into the living room, sit him down on the couch and gently tell him to stop trying to explain himself before taking himself off to make the two of them some tea and calm his own racing heart.

It was borderline scary seeing his friend fixing for a panic attack like that having just been in his own little world all day. He was about to start making himself some dinner before the doorbell rang, not expecting a delivery or any visitors to then have Ray out on the porch having some kind of breakdown.

Sickening concern of course was running through him as he stirred the tea having picked up only a handful of words such as 'Kai,' 'cheated,' and something about Mariah being pregnant. His own mind was racing trying to slot the puzzle pieces together but he didn't need to know what happened right away, he just needed Ray to breathe.

Once a soothing cup was being clutched by tanned fingers, Tyson figured it best to start off on his own short tales of the past few months, giving Ray some kind of distraction for a little bit whilst he concentrated on his breathing and got some sugar in his system.

Ray hadn't really been listening on the update but he'd been grateful for the minor diversion and once he was calm enough started to bring the other up to speed on everything he'd tried to tell him earlier. Fully aware that even with a more relaxed retell of events it was still an information overload but like the tears from his eyes on his way over here, once he'd started he couldn't stop.

Like it was his own private therapy session he confessed to it all. Reeling everything off that had transpired over the last several weeks. Both his and Kai's wrong doings being spewed out of him with no hesitation as his old team mate just stared back, nodding every so often to him as he processed it all.

Tyson had had no idea. Which wasn't all that surprising considering they didn't all live in each others pockets like they used to when they were kids. But even so, he would've expected to have had _some_ kind of idea that his friends were in this kind of mess. Was only a few weeks back since he last saw Kai on their little reunion night out and he'd just seemed his usual 'chirpy' self.

He felt useless as Ray continued to fill him in; Not knowing how to help, or if he even could, except for offering him the spare room upstairs and the assurance he could stay with him for as long as he needed.

"Alright, well, just give me a call or something then when you're on your way back. Can go get some ramen or something for lunch if ya fancy?"

Ray sent him a smile as his hand pulled the front door open.

He had zero appetite but humoured him anyway. He knew he was trying and he was grateful to have a friend nearby during all of this.

"Yeah sounds good. Thanks again Tyson. I won't be too long."

He received a nod in response before stepping out and walked to his car parked out on the street, feeling just a little bit nauseous now either from nerves or lack of food.

He had nothing to be anxious over though. Like he'd just said to Tyson, Kai would be several miles away at work so he could pack up all his things at his own leisure and cry as much as he wanted to if he needed.

Hell, he could even go smash and dig up the entire back yard if he wanted too. _Really_ show Kai what he thought about what he'd done to them and about _him._

Having spent hours just staring up at the ceiling last night Ray had had a long time to think. So many puzzle pieces seeming to fall into place or so he'd convinced himself.

Truth be told his mind had come up with all sorts of ideas and scenarios and he didn't even know what to think or believe anymore.

Like that one Thursday several weeks ago for example, when Kai had claimed to be working late and didn't come home until past eleven. Had he actually been at work or was he with Tala in some sleazy motel somewhere?

Every time Kai had ever gone out 'for a run' is that really what he went out for?

Sure he came home out of breath and dripping with sweat but he'd been looking the same way yesterday when he was there on their bed on all fucking fours.

How many times had he fucked him but had been thinking about Tala the whole time?

Better yet had Kai even meant it when he'd said he wanted to fix this? When he said he loved him?

Had everything just been one big fucking lie?

Why waste _both_ of their times going to therapy when it clearly wasn't what he wanted? Why not just call it all off before now?

And then not only that, but he himself was going to be a father in several months? How the hell was he supposed to deal with all that? Sure he loved kids and went all gushy over babies but he didn't have the first clue on how to look after one?

Turning the key in the ignition Ray had wound himself up to tears again. Cursing himself once more for not having any tissues in the car and having to just use his jacket sleeve.

What hurt the most was the fact that even after all of this he still loved Kai. Of course he did. And he was still sorry for all _he'd_ done to them.

Knowing what Kai had done didn't bring him any kind of satisfaction to know they were 'even' now. If anything it was like pouring alcohol on an open wound when he found out. It fucking hurt.

He loved him. But in the same breath he also hated him with every fibre of his being and he hoped he never had to see him again.

Same with Mariah. Though knew that wasn't an option now...

x-x-x

He'd been awake all night.

Usually piercing ruby orbs were dark and blending in with the whites of his eyes that were completely blood shot from his tears and lack of sleep.

He was exhausted. So much so he couldn't bring himself to go into the office today. Could hardly keep his eyes open but sleep seemed to be avoiding him like the plague.

He gave up trying at around 4am, dragged his numb body off the couch and attempted to distract himself with some work. The bright light of the computer screen hurting his eyes some but once they'd adjusted they'd may as well have just stayed blurry as nothing before him was making any sense. Even with him running the place, knowing the business like the back of his hand, due to his overall low mood, and the fatigue only exacerbating this, everything that sat on his screen may as well have been written in a foreign language.

He switched the computer off in his frustration. He couldn't concentrate.

The minutes continued to pass him by and once the clock struck eight, him deeming that a more suitable time of morning, he called Tiffany and fed her some excuse regarding a fake illness, gave her a list of things that needed dealing with that day and took himself back to the couch with another mug of coffee and her well wishes.

He was pretty sure she didn't buy any of it. He'd never had a sick day in his life. Could lose an arm one morning and he'd still be there at his desk no later than ten but like he'd done she'd put on a fairly good performance in believing him.

What the fuck was he going to do?

There must be a way to fix this...

Though the more he racked his brain for a crazy solution the more he pissed himself off at the raging shit storm he found himself in.

He probably could have gotten over this at some point if Ray hadn't got the dumb bitch pregnant. Would've taken some time to heal completely, but he had actually started to slowly view him how he used to and not in such a shitty light.

Having that damn baby scan shoved in his face though just took him straight back to square one.

He hated him. Hated him for what he did. For leaving for China in the first place. For having anything to do with Mariah still after all this time, when he _knew_ he couldn't stand her and tried to pass off his feelings for her as some bullshit platonic friendship!

He forced himself to shower. The last time being when he was all wrapped up in Ray yesterday morning. Had him pressed up against the wall, driving in to him from behind as their moans and the sound of water had echoed off the tiles.

Had been the best morning they'd had for a while... He never thought for one second he'd have been spending that night alone...

With him dried, dressed and another coffee down him, Kai felt a little more awake though still just felt shitty. He figured this was just who he was now though so had to deal with it.

He looked to the clock. Was almost ten. He'd best go make himself scarce.

He had no idea what time Ray was planning on coming over for his stuff but if he made a point of being out all day then they'd surely avoid each other.

A part of him wanted to see him, and then the other did not.

One his mind's crazy suggestions was for them to do what Dr Lange had suggested before and just 'talk it out.'

He'd spent half of his life running away and avoiding shit maybe now was the time to finally stop and fight for what he wanted.

But what did he want?

First thought would have been Ray, but after all of this? Did he actually want him?

He was going to be having a child. A real life _baby, w_ith a girl that he had or _has_ feelings for. Who even knows anymore?

But say he and Ray sorted things out.. Patched up the battle scars and put all of this behind them somehow. Who's to say that as soon as this scraggly kid comes along, that Ray wouldn't go all gooey and then just leave him for her anyway?

Ray had always wanted the typical love story of marriage and kids and he didn't want any of that so why an earth would he give up the idea of having all that just to be with him? Especially after everything now?

With a long sigh escaping his nose Kai placed his empty cup into the sink when the sound of the front door unlocking caused him to freeze.

Shit. No. Ray? He wasn't supposed to still be here! _Fuck!_

He turned to watch the front door open and a head of dark hair appear, looking a lot more dishevelled than usual and locked on a face that looked just as dumbfound as his own.

Pausing halfway in the house and halfway out, eyes still sore and just as bloodshot as they were when he pulled himself out of bed, Ray stopped and stared as his heart did all sorts of weird things in his chest to the point it hurt.

He wasn't supposed to be there. He was supposed to be at work! This was supposed to be easy, where he could come in and get out and fuck up the yard the same way they'd gone and fucked up their relationship!

Part of him wanted to just take the foot that had made it into the house and put it back out, come back another time when he could do this without an audience, but at the same time didn't want to roll over and back down. Just yesterday this was his home too, and he had a right to get his things. They didn't even need to speak to each other.

Closing the door behind him, he walked right by Kai into the kitchen to the cabinet under the sink for the trash bags quietly. Chest still hurting but mouth tightly sealed shut.

Kai had stepped aside and out of his way when he strode in. Eyes both avoiding him though daring to look all the same. It was hard not to notice Ray too looked just as rough as he did this morning, them both sporting the same darkened areas underneath their reddened eyes.

He swallowed and shifted some against the counter he'd set himself back against. Not really knowing what to do with himself as Ray rummaged under the sink.

Did he offer to help? Offer a drink even? He had a ton of questions but didn't feel he had any right to the answers now, though one came out of him anyway.

"So where did you stay last night?"

Ray's ears perked and his back tensed, eyes pricking harder at the voice he loved and hated to hear right now as it sounded like nails on a chalk board more than what it used to.

Why couldn't he just go upstairs and hide in his office? He was good at that when they were together, so why shadow now?

But, did he go and be the bigger man here and answer or avoid the question? It was simple enough, when he thought about it. Was a harmless question, but it begged Ray to come up with his own.

"Why do you care?"

Kai's jaw clenched. On one hand he'd love to just snap back and tell him that regardless of everything that had happened between them he of course still cared about him and would have received some form of solace in knowing he'd spent the night comfortable either at a friends or in a hotel room.

The ice in Ray's tone though made him question himself. Made him feel like a damn fool for giving a shit about him at all considering everything and the avoidance of the question only giving him the image of him going crawling to Mariah and spending the night wherever she was resting her mangy head.

"Ok. You're right. I don't. Forget it." He bit, turning on his heel and storming out of the kitchen.

Ray's own jaw tightened, clutching the trash bag he'd pull from the box under the sink as Kai's footsteps echoed in his head.

He told himself just to let him go, it's what he wanted, there was no reason to keep digging and digging and burning their bridge now that it was said and done, but his mouth moved on him before he could stop himself.

Whirling around to a stand, clutching the bag at his side and the fresh tears in his eyes, it hurt even worse having to actually look at him. Even if it was the back of Kai's head.

"I was at Tyson's. He's letting me stay for a while, until I can figure something out."

Kai's feet had come to a halt. Standing still in the hall for a moment he swallowed down the slight annoyance caused by the unnecessary attitude before turning back to face him.

"So I'm guessing you told him everything then? All our dirty laundry out there now for all to see? What did he say?"

Why he even cared what Tyson thought or had said was beyond him. Whole thing was just embarrassing more than anything and for some reason he didn't like the thought of him thinking any less of either them.

Ray's shoulders came up before his arms flopped back to his side almost lifelessly, "I don't even remember if he even said anything about it, to be honest."

A subtle sigh escaped the other where he stood outside the kitchen doorway.

Even if Tyson had said anything he surely wouldn't have picked a side. Bit of an awkward position for the kid to be in.

Two of his long standing friends in the predicament they were in. What could he have possibly said?

Though, maybe he _did_ take Ray's side. Poor sweet innocent Ray who can do no wrong. Would never be seen as the bad guy so long as Kai was around fucking everything up.

"Right." He said in an unconvinced tone. His exhausted mind getting to the stage where he no longer even cared for answers.

It was obvious the two of them had spent the entire evening gossiping like a pair of teenagers but if Ray wanted to play dumb and keep secrets like he had done for a while now then that was fine. Whatever Tyson had said or thought, his opinion meant nothing to him either. Could not care any less.

Taking in the tone, the snap, Ray's hair nearly stood on end.

The hell was he getting like that for when he'd actually gone and answered him this time?

"What?" He spat back, "Sorry I can't recall every little detail for you, wasn't even expecting you here to start with. Why _are_ you even here? You should be at work."

Maybe he was waiting for Tala to show up, must be it. Only reason he could think of, now that he was out of the way. But of course him being in the picture never stopped Kai before.

The hardened expression opposite him faltered slightly.

Yes he knew where he should have been. That had been the original plan but unfortunately having not got an ounce of sleep last night the last thing he could deal with was the tedious drone of a day at the office.

He didn't appreciate that attitude radiating from him once again though. Ray knew this was his damn house right? He was really going to try and tell _him_ what to do?

"Didn't feel like going in." He replied with a shrug and sense of arrogance. "Pros of being the boss, can do what I want. _Problem?"_

"You." He'd said before he could even stop himself, though at this point wasn't even sure if there was stopping this snowball from rolling out of control now since he'd stepped foot in the front door.

Kai's eyes narrowed at him, his face adopting a small sneer before responding.

"Well lucky for you, you don't have to deal with me anymore do you? Always was just this huge problem that you couldn't wait to get fucking rid of!"

This was _not_ how he wanted this to go but he couldn't control his tongue either. This definitely being one of the instances where he'd just walk. Leave before it got any more heated.

Kai could sense his feet wanting to move but the therapist had said that conflict was sometimes good right? Fight it out? Though he was pretty sure she hadn't meant land one right on his face and that was the only thing he was really wanting to do right now.

"_Really_?!" Ray's voice went up in pitch, the sarcasm already dripping off his tongue with a look to match it.

"Because after all the years I spent being with you, helping you, making sure you didn't drink yourself to death, you think _this_ is what I wanted?!" He yelled at him, the trash bag in his hold flying about as his arm flailed beside him.

"Guess what you fucking moron, I wanted YOU!"

"THEN WHY DID YOU FUCK HER RAY?!" Kai's voice cracked as he yelled back at him, arms held out at his sides in question.

"You've been saying this over and over but how can you want _me_ when you _LEFT ME?_... For _HER_!" His arm flung out, violently gesturing to the front door behind him like she was there.

"It wasn't _for_ her! It was to get away from _you!_ Because you scared me! You grabbed me! Bruised me! We were falling apart before that even happened, but let's not even forget the fact that _the_ second you drop me off at the airport you're already getting your dick wet!" Ray's voice cracked as it reached that same level it had the day before, eyes slitting and tears free falling down his face.

Kai huffed a laugh.

"And a handful of hours later so were you so what difference does it fucking make huh?!" His throat was starting to feel raspy from all the yelling and the lump sitting there now wasn't helping either.

It hurt to swallow. His ears were ringing. His body was shaking with adrenaline and his mouth was running away with itself.

"But fine since I'm _so_ fucking bad and awful that you need to get as far away from me as possible, go do what you came to, pack your shit, and get the _fuck_ out!"

"The difference is if you keep claiming to love me like you do, then why the hell would you do it?! What's your fucking excuse, Kai?!" Ray screamed louder, on the verge of shaking with him as his eyes were just as sore as his throat.

Kai's heart was racing in his chest. Once again torn between absolute transparency and protecting the feelings of the man before him.

Though really was that even doable at this point? The tears that were falling down his tanned cheeks would suggest he'd already failed with that one.

"Well like you said we were falling apart long before so..."

In a failed attempt to stop his bottom lip from wobbling so hard, Ray bit into it only for his fangs to graze through. Eyes not really focusing on anything as he tried to breathe properly.

He'd gone and asked, for whatever reason wanted to know even though he knew it'd hurt something fierce and of course it had.

All of this fucking hurt.

"So... Was my fault, before it was actually my fault then. Wasn't good enough for you? Even after all the shit I put up with, after everything I fucking did for you! It wasn't fucking enough?!"

"Why do you constantly hold that over me?!" Kai barked in frustration. "So what, am I meant to be forever in-fucking-debted to you or something?!"

Yes he was grateful for having been pulled out of the darkness more than once. Yes he was more than aware that if Ray hadn't come along who fucking knows what would've happened to him. But what Ray seemed to be forgetting was that his actions hadn't gone completely unreciprocated. He hadn't just gone and shat all over his kindness and said 'great thanks, see you later.' He'd provided him with enough to show the extent of his gratitude to last him a lifetime and he'll be damned if he was going to let him stand there and make out like he'd just caused him years of fucking grief.

"Do you forget all that I've done for _you, _Ray_?!_"

"I _never_ said that! But I want to know what the hell it is _I_ did that was so goddamn awful that you'd go and fuck someone else before I even left the fucking country! I hadn't even fucking left yet, so you can't say it was because I'd already gone and gotten my piece, because I hadn't!" Ray shot back, chest heaving and hurting like the rest of him, trying to take in as much air as he could as he locked eyes with him while at the same time wanting to just fall to the floor.

"...So why?" He asked in a broken, scratchy tone. A complete look of defeat on his face.

Kai's mouth opened but no words followed. Instead he took in a deep shuddery breath and for the first time since Ray had walked through the door his gaze broke from the piercing gold staring back at him.

The only answer he could possibly give him was the same one he gave Tala at the restaurant but for some reason he didn't dare send it to him.

He just remained where he stood, eventually closing his mouth and pressing his lips together before his feet did what they should've done fifteen minutes ago and walked.

The plastic of the trash bag at his side crinkled loudly as Ray gripped it tightly, muscles tensing and arms shaking as his brows came down and the tears were halted for a moment.

There wasn't a reason then? After all the shit he kept getting for the one mistake he'd ever gone and made in his life, that he went and crawled on his knees and begged forgiveness for, Kai had the audacity to turn his back on him?!

"So why yesterday? Why the restaurant? Or any of the other times then, huh?! Just felt like a random fuck because you were bored? Or because you really are that much of an asshole?!"

If Kai continued to hold the amount of tension in his jaw for much longer he was sure he'd crack a few teeth. The other set of feet he could hear quickly following after him causing him to clench further as he tried to bail from the situation though with the relentless onslaught of words knew Ray wasn't going to let him walk away from this one.

"No.. It wasn't that.." He sent through his grit teeth, the volcano within him simmering and starting to bubble as he felt himself get more and more irate at feeling like a caged animal, being prodded and poked, the threat of snapping for real at any point if the attacks continued.

"Oh, but let's not forget either that you even said you actually don't even fucking care about the son of a bitch, yet I know of three, THREE times you fucked him behind my back! One of those three times I was only ten fucking feet away from you, along with his WIFE!" Ray screamed after him, the anger and sarcasm mixing in as the tears dried on his face.

He was done begging for forgiveness. Done with trying to mend things when Kai was going right behind him and tearing them apart anyways.

"And oh my god! Yesterday, how fucking crazy of me to think for a second shit was getting better between us. That I wanted to come home and surprise you, but lo and behold it's not I who surprises you, but you who surprises me! And for fucking what?! Because the bitch showed up here? I don't fucking care about her, Kai! That's why I slammed a door in her face the day before! Why I was _trying_ to fix this with you, but that, like everything else, just wasn't good enough for YOU!"

Kai's fists were balled at his sides before a growl escaped his throat and he turned back to face him, crimson turning to almost black as he stared him dead in the eyes as something within him broke.

"It used to be good enough Ray but then it just got boring, alright?! Is that what you wanna hear? You wanna know why I did it? You _really_ wanna know what fucking happened? Why we fell apart?" He took a step closer to him, face contorted into a snarl as he towered slightly over him.

"We _never_ spent time together. Sure, I prioritised work, but _you_ prioritised your little buddies that, surprise, surprise, involved _her_. For the longest time you knew how it made me feel but you kept her around anyway. You _knew_ she despised me just as much as I did her and you still entertained her Ray. Why? I'll tell you why. Let's just be real fucking transparent here shall we? Because you liked the attention and don't even deny it."

Before Ray could even muster a few words of defence Kai continued.

"She gave you what I wasn't, and I _knew,_ I FUCKING KNEW she was still wanting to get her damn claws in you and would you listen to me?! NO!"

His chest was heaving in and out of him but the words kept coming. Like the relentless onslaught Ray had just sent him it was his turn.

"So whilst you were there gallivanting with her, not giving a shit about what you had at home, turns out, you weren't the only one getting some much needed attention."

His tone slowly started to adopt venom the more he spoke, Ray's earlier hardened expression diminishing and transitioning into pained and worry for the next string of words that would more than likely cut him like a knife.

"Contrary to what you might think I was far from interested at first. Sure, thought the guy was hot as hell. Shit, I'll be honest, I still fucking do. But that's all it was Ray. A bit of eye candy from a distance. But then that night you blew me off _for them_ after I'd spent an _hour_ making you dinner, he text me, gave me _attention_. Actually seemed to fucking desire me in a way that _you_ haven't since god knows when!"

Every word, although he'd gone and had asked to know, stung in a way Ray didn't even know it could. All the while he truly didn't have a defence for, but it wasn't like Kai had asked for one, and like before he was done with asking for his forgiveness over it.

"We were working on making it better! And while here I was trying to do that you were fucking _him_ behind my back! You fucking called _his_ name the night we got back from the restaurant! It wasn't even that you wanted me then, it was because of him! Did you at all, for once, care if we fixed this at all?" His voiced strained, though his tears refused to fall this time around.

"Of course I did!" Kai snarled, looking at him like he'd asked the most ridiculous question in the world.

"Why would I go along with it all, put myself in that _god_ awful position again of being sat in a therapy room with some random stranger if it was just for show huh? Just to pass the damn time?!"

His hate filled gaze remained on him. Lungs desperate for air and he could feel a raging headache coming on from all the shouting.

"I didn't wanna keep doing it. Didn't want to keep making things worse between us and believe me when I say I tried to stop it, _fuck,_ I really did!"

Kai let out a hopeless laugh as his hand made it to his forehead before sliding down his face, knowing full well Ray wasn't going to believe a word of what he was saying but he'd asked and was going down the complete honesty route.

"You don't think I knew it was wrong? You think I'm fucking stupid? I _knew_ it was all wrong Ray but shit, it was exciting! That was it! Was a cheap thrill and I drank it up because he made me feel like I was actually wanted! It's pathetic! I know! 'Cos we all know damn well a guy like that is only after one thing but in the moment he made me feel a type of way that you haven't in a while."

"Because all of yesterday morning meant absolutely nothing to either of us, then. Apparently. Oh, but all just because she shows up! For fucks sakes Kai, the least you could have done then, the best route to take, was wait for me to come home and _talk_ to me about it. Any sane and normal person would have done that! But no. The 'thrill' or whatever the fuck it was, was just 'too' great to pass up." Ray bit, the sarcasm back and burning.

"Thank God and whoever else out there Tiffany is a woman, cus who knows what kind of 'thrills' you could have gotten up to then all these years." His sore eyes rolled, hoping his words hit a mark somewhere, but at this point in time he was sure they were wasted on him.

If he had cared, any, that they were putting things back together then he wouldn't have been screwing Tala behind the scenes. That was just a damn fact.

How they got to where they were now, they couldn't change that, but he had thought they were at least trying to make better steps forward before everything fell around them.

But while he was grasping with both hands too tightly, it seemed Kai had already let go.

His feral eyes locked back on him, arms coming around his chest as his hip went out some as his tongue ran along the front of his teeth before his upper lip curled back some.

"And yes, I do think you're stupid. All of that is stupid. To go and let yourself be used by someone who doesn't give a shit about you, for some cheap ass, while throwing away someone who has always cared and has always been there for you. Guess what, Kai, life happens. Shit gets hard and things don't always work out, but the kicker here is that I was still willing to try. I still wanted you, as long as you still wanted me, and I'd do anything and everything to change what I did but I can't. But I _thought_ that I was doing my best in showing you how sorry I was for doing it to us in the first place, but again. Just wasn't good enough for you." His feet moved him quickly to the stairs, if Kai followed then he followed but for now he was done and just wanted to get his things and leave this all behind him now and move on for good.

Kai remained put but his feet were itching to follow. Hands wanting to throttle him but arms desperate to just wrap around him and hold on tight.

He felt an idiot. How he'd allowed history to repeat itself in such a way that was once again him succumbing to some form of temptation, some darkness that was no good for him, he had no idea.

He took himself off into the living room opposite. The room seeming a little bare with the coffee table he'd smashed up yesterday no longer there in the center, swept up and placed outside where this relationship should go - in the trash.

He flopped onto the couch, resting his head in his hands as his ears still rang from the yells and roaring voices that had gone on for almost an hour now.

He took in a deep breath, fingers pressing into his temples to try relieve the pain thumping away in his head.

He probably should have waited for him to get home. Never should have called his assistant for Tala's number again and not reacted in such an extreme way like he did. He'd deleted the number for a reason as he really was trying to walk away from it and he should have stood by that decision.

Though, what difference it would've made he wasn't sure. Mariah was still pregnant at the end of the day, and he'd still been screwing around with Tala prior so.

Really, what difference would it have made if he'd have waited and spoke to Ray about it? Only thing was that if he had, Ray would have still been none the wiser of all he'd done. Wouldn't have had front row seats to it that was for sure.

But then what?

Like hell would he have gotten over the fact she was pregnant so they'd have broke it all off anyway but Ray would've been seen as the only guilty party.

Was still a lose/lose situation either way regardless of what he did.

He eased himself back into the couch. Hands falling from his face as his eyes watered. The sound of Ray pulling apart trash bag after trash bag upstairs, filling it with his clothes, his belongings and more than likely deliberately leaving anything that reminded him of him.

He was sorry... he really was.. for all of it.

Though, what was done was done now... He couldn't change any of it.

Ray would be fine. Got a damn baby of all things to keep himself occupied and busy for the next 18 years. Whereas him?

What the fuck did he have now?

The second he'd made it to the room, the damn tears fell out of him again with no end in sight this time.

What was once a place where he'd felt more home and safe than anywhere in the world was now completely so foreign to him he almost didn't recognize it, even if it looked exactly the same as it did yesterday (aside from one redhead screwing his boyfriend on his bed).

He did his best to avoid looking at it, lest he just see it all happening again and again and again. He only had one thing to do and that was get his shit and get the hell out as fast as he could now. Could just open the window and drop the bags out of it so he didn't have to make all the trips up and down the stairs just to avoid Kai again.

How he'd gone and wasted years of his life with someone who would just turn and throw it all away like this, he didn't know, but at the same time was torn.

Would he do it again?

Ten to one he would because even despite all this, he still loved him. Still had wanted things to work out, just such a shame Kai didn't. Regardless of what he'd said.

Actions spoke louder than words, and Kai had always been a man of action. So him saying that he wanted it to work but going around and sleeping with Tala behind his back was clearly a lie, all for some cheap 'thrill'.

Well now, he could have all the cheap fucking thrills his black heart wanted!

He didn't even realize the pained cry that tore out of him as he shoved an armful of clothes into a bag, the plastic ripping along the side with how tightly he'd been pulling the top part of it and the clothes that he'd already shoved in there spilled out on the floor around him.

His chest heaved, vision blurry from the accumulation of tears in his eyes as he sat there and put his face in his hands.

With Kai sitting in complete silence downstairs, the only noise being the loud ramblings going on in his head, the distraught sound that had come from Ray's throat in the bedroom had easily made it to his ears.

Of all the noises he'd ever heard from a person he'd never heard a tone so heart-breaking. There was no denying that Ray was obviously just as hurt as he was. Perhaps even more so.

He continued to sit for a minute, suppressing his breathing somewhat to listen for more sounds from him. Conflicted on whether he should remain right where he was and let Ray do what he came to do, or go upstairs and just, _be_ there for him, he didn't fucking know.

Love really was the most messed up emotion you could experience. All made sense now on why they trained him to specifically avoid such feelings because all it did was fuck you up internally.

How can you hate someone for all they'd done to you, said to you, yet still want them to be okay? Still want to comfort them when you hear them upset?

At another muffled cry from above he rose to his feet. Almost hesitantly treading up the stairs and heading for their bedroom.

Would Ray even want him there? Might have been yet another one of his scenarios where he took himself off specifically just to get away from him, but he slowly pushed open the bedroom door anyway, a slight creak letting the male inside know that he was no longer alone.

Ray didn't even look up, face still in his hands and beyond done with everything and anything that at this point he shouldn't have come at all.

They were just pieces of fabric, easily replaced, wasn't like he had much of anything else that he absolutely needed to live with and now that he thought about it, where the hell was he going to put anything? He didn't want to burden Tyson anymore than what he already was, much less take up space in his home.

"I ripped the bag!" His distressed voice came out of him, why that was what he had said to him he didn't know, not when there were so many other things he could have said to him in the moment but right now he just couldn't deal with another screaming match. Couldn't deal with pointing fingers and who was to blame for the reason he was even putting his clothes in trash bags like he was.

Kai looked down to him as he let go of the safety barrier that was the door and stepped further into the room. Continuing to take cautious steps as he made it over to his double wardrobe and pulled out a decently sized duffle bag from the bottom of it.

He set it down on the bed for him and opened up the zipper.

"You don't have to take everything in one go... isn't going anywhere..." He said in a mutter, his tone now showing clear defeat and hopelessness as he fussed with the bag. "Use this instead, make things easier for yourself.."

Even with the softer tone, Ray still flinched on the floor but removed his face from his hands and looked up to see what Kai was doing then at the clothes he'd gone and packed in a bag already and the ones he was sitting in now.

It hadn't occurred to him until now just how many clothes he had, having just gone and grabbed everything from his drawers almost blindly and shoving them in, hadn't even made it to the closet yet either. He was sure half of these clothes hadn't been worn in a year or two either.

Kai was right, they weren't going anywhere, but it wasn't like he wanted to have to come back more than once and do this. He didn't even want to do this in the first place!

He simply nodded to him, taking a hold of himself and letting out deep breaths to try and calm some of the new tears as he shuffled through the clothes that had exploded out of the bag.

His hand paused and hovered over a shirt that made his chest ache worse, one that Kai had bought him that was one of his favourites because of how well it fit him and just the fact that Kai had bought it on a whim and surprised him with it one day after he'd said he'd liked it the day before when they had been out window shopping.

His fingers curled around the fabric, and shoved it away into a different pile, one that he wouldn't be taking with him and went to sort through the rest of his clothes.

"Do what you want with these, and whatever's left in the closet."

Kai silently nodded to him. Knowing that he wasn't going to just go and throw his things away and was going to leave everything right where it was for the time being.

Just because they were starting all over again in regards of a relationship, that didn't mean Ray had to start again with his home life too. Throwing out all of his things for whatever reason, there was no need for it they could be civil with this.

He didn't mind keeping his things here until he eventually got a place of his own he was sure with his new family. Wasn't like his house wasn't big enough.

He sat himself down on the bed, feeling awkward just hanging around and watching Ray pack but at the same time didn't want to leave.

"I'm sorry..."

Hand coming away from the pile of clothes, having two on either side of him now with the one he was leaving behind bigger than the one he was taking, Ray lowered his head where his bangs covered his face and took in another shaky breath.

"Bit late for that..." He breathed out, eyes looking past the dark curtain of his hair to him on the bed.

"It's so goddamn late for that, Kai. Because like you already said, he gave you what I couldn't. And all the while it was _never_ my intention to do what I did, you _had_ every intention to do what you did. And yet, the only one who was actually sorry for it, the one who was trying and putting in the actual effort to fix it all, was me. Because hell, if I hadn't come home early yesterday I wouldn't have known at all, would I?

"You've kept this from me, this entire time. Almost two months, _two_ _months_ Kai! While I've been made to feel like the bad guy this whole time. And yes, I know! I know what I did was wrong, I do. And I apologized, so many times I lost count! But it wasn't enough." Although his voice had risen, had bite to it, it wasn't the hysterical screaming and shouting he'd been doing downstairs. If anything he was calm, which in a way surprised himself because he felt anything but calm. And why he continued to waste his words on him, he didn't know.

Though Kai's demeanour started to adopt an expression that suggested he was anything but calm and his tone rose to match it.

"Wait. You think I fucking planned all of this? You really think I intended on doing what I did? Have you not listened to a damn word I've said to you the entire time you've been here?!"

He hadn't planned shit! Ray couldn't be serious right now?!

Sure he shouldn't have invited Tala over that night he dropped Ray at the airport. Shouldn't have put himself in such a vulnerable position, open for temptation. But he hadn't _ever_ planned on fucking him.

Hadn't he?

He'd known Tala was interested in him. Hell, the guy had barely kept it a secret. He knew what _he_ had been fixing for, and Kai still allowed him to come over and it be just the two of them.

Was almost like he'd hoped for what happened to happen...

But no! That wasn't true! It wasn't meant to turn into what it did. Was meant to be harmless texts and the redhead thirsting over him from afar and just stroking his ego every now and then. How that had transitioned into him stroking his cock he didn't know. But it wasn't planned!

"I could say the same about _you_ though!" he then hurled back. "You've kept her close all this time, knowing how she felt about you, knowing how _you_ felt about her. But I'm just supposed to believe you hadn't planned any of it?"

"Believe what you want, Kai! At this point what does it matter what either of us believe any ways?! Late nights at the office, hell if I know if that's the truth now, been living in a lie for two months with you when I have been nothing but honest with you about where she stood and where she will always stand! Yes, I realize now that it was wrong to keep her around knowing how badly she had it out for you, and how badly you had it out for her. That I will take responsibility for, and for all the other shit that I have done. I can do that! But can you do the same?!"

"I have!" Kai spat as he abruptly stood up from the bed, eyes watering now in frustration as he stood before him. "I apologised! Not that it'll ever fucking cut it but please believe me when I say I'm fucking sorry Ray! I'm sorry you had to see that and I'm sorry for every time I hurt you, mentally or physically."

A lone tear trickled down his fair cheek as he kept his eyes on him. He'd usually falter and shy away from showing such emotion but he needed him to see, needed Ray to believe that he was riddled with remorse and regret.

"And yet my own fucking apologies weren't enough for you!" Ray screamed back at him, picking himself up off the floor so he didn't have to crane his neck just to look at him.

"And you know, the best part of this. I didn't have to say shit to you about it. I didn't have to tell you anything, but I wanted to be honest with you. Wanted to put things back the way they were. I could have been like you, not say anything and just have it shoved in your face like you did to me. But I didn't. I didn't because I actually fucking loved you!"

Kai's chest heaved in on him as that revelation felt like he'd just had the air knocked out of him. Another tear slipping down his cheek as he stared back at him processing what he'd thrown his way.

As painful as it was to hear, Ray had done him some form of courtesy being the one to confess that day. Confess to his sins and beg for his forgiveness.

He couldn't even imagine giving Mariah the satisfaction of revealing everything to him completely out of the blue as she had done with the baby scan.

That's what had happened to Ray though.. straight caught them in the act. The confession of his affair not through words, but imagery...

He swallowed. His throat feeling tighter now at the painful lump sitting within it and kept his lips closed.

He really didn't have anything to say to him...

Ray's eyes stayed on him, watering heavily and having hoped to hear something back. Either more heated words or that Kai at some point in time did love him too, but with him standing there quietly now in the stale air around them maybe that was his cue to stay quiet now himself and finish getting his things and finally walking out of his life.

Grabbing the pile of clothes he'd put aside to take with him, he took them to the bag Kai had set out and dumped them in. Coming back for the trash bag he'd packed and zipped up the duffle bag quietly, nearly choking on the tension now.

He wished he could wish him well, to have a good life and to take care of himself but just didn't have it in him to do anything more but stare at him with the same broken hearted gaze he'd gone and adopted.

The whole scene felt familiar. Ray with bags packed and the two of them watching the others heart shatter further before their eyes. The only thing that was missing was an electric flight screen and the odd announcement over the tannoy system radiating through the airport.

He was leaving him. Again.

And it was all because of him... Again.

The only difference this time though was that he knew he wasn't ever coming back and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.

Tears kept on silently rolling down his cheeks and like he was replaying the scene to its fullest, Kai daring to take a step forward, hesitantly opening his arms up and wrapping them around Ray's neck.

Regardless of everything he needed to just press pause on this. Needed to just take a step back from it all and try and feel some normality for a moment.

Just hold him. Feel him a final time. Breathe in his scent and try to engrain it into his memory.

Ray tensed, though relaxed instantly. Even after everything, all the harsh words, all the horrible things they'd gone and done to each other, this still felt like home and he wanted nothing more than to rewind the clock and take it all back just so he could stay.

Timidly, almost as if he were afraid, his own arms came up and limply held around Kai's back and buried his face into his chest.

"I'm s-sorry..." His voice cracked as he cried into him.

Kai's lower lip trembled something fierce as he rest his head in dark hair. The grip he had on him tightening a little as he sniffled and his next words coming out in a weak whisper.

"Don't go..."

He didn't want to, but how could he stay? How could they actually fix any of this this time around? There really was no salvaging it, no matter how hard they tried.

He shook his head into him, slowly letting his hands fall away and back to his sides.

"I'm sorry.." He repeated, unable to look him in the face. "I can't..."

Kai loosened his grip of him feeling the hold Ray had on him break and cupped his chin, lifting his head up to look at him.

"You can! We can sort this, Ray. I- I don't know how, but we can fix this!" He blurted out to him in clear desperation, his thumb wiping at the tears falling from golden eyes.

He couldn't do this without him. He was his everything. Kid or not they could surely get through this, and just pretend none of it ever happened. Go back to how they were!

He couldn't leave him. He wanted him. _Needed_ him.

Ray choked on a sob, head still shaking slowly. "I a-already tried."

"We can try again! Have more therapy! Anything! I'll do anything! Everything's out there now Ray there's nothing else to hide!" Kai's voice cracked on him as he cupped both sides of Ray's face with his hands now, tears shamelessly falling from his glistening eyes before pressing his forehead against his.

"Please... please don't leave me... I love you, I need you..."

"I can't, Kai! I tried! I gave everything I could, everything! I can't do it again! You're too late!" He yelled, pulling out of his hold and taking a step back.

"Just let me go, because you didn't seem to care at all yesterday what could have happened if I knew. You didn't care until now! It's too late to care!"

"R-Ray.." Kai stuttered, reaching out for him as Ray had turned to pick up his bags from the bed. "No.. it- it isn't too late... It isn't too late! We can fix this!" He cried out almost hysterically grabbing the handles of the duffle bag that the other had a hold of.

"I'm nothing without you Ray! Don't you understand! You can't leave me!"

Ray's heart leapt in his throat, tugging at the bag that Kai now had a hold of as they fought over it.

"Let go Kai, let it go! I don't want this anymore! I don't want this!" He screamed and cried at him, pulling the bag as hard as he could.

"I-I don't l-love you anymore, so let. It. Go!" He lied, anything to get this over and done with so the torment would end. He couldn't take it anymore. Feeling like he was fixing to collapse from exhaustion while his head seared with a headache that had settled in along with everything else just hurting ten times worse every time he was set off again.

He just wanted it to end.

At that pale fingers immediately lost their grip as Kai's whole body seemed to freeze up on him and shut down almost.

"What?"

As quickly as he could, before Kai grabbed hold of it again, Ray snatched the duffle bag off the bed and clutched it to his side as his body shook harder than it ever had.

"D-don't even... Even pretend... T-hat you love m-me anymore either... We... We wouldn't be doing th-this if we did.." He stuttered, trying his hardest to keep standing as he drove in the final knife but couldn't even look him in the face as he did it.

It was all a lie, but of course it was, but after time eventually it would be the truth. They'd stop loving each other. Move on. Maybe find someone else to waste their time on and rinse and repeat.

"I.. I d-don't, Kai... So just let m-me go." He heaved.

What was left of Kai's heart shattered as he stared back with parted lips in both shock and disbelief.

His mind was racing, his breathing starting to become erratic as he looked to the other male who refused to meet his gaze now.

"No... you... you don't mean that... you're lying..." He managed through his shuddering breaths, clutching on to the slightest ounce of hope that was drastically fading.

Ray shook his head back, unable to even utter a word now.

Why couldn't he just let him go?!

Leaving the trash bag of clothes by the bed, he took what little he had in the duffle bag at his side and quickly pivoted on his heels.

He just needed to go, end it before they continued to go in circles and practically ran for the bedroom door.

Kai watched him go, his body wanting to chase him but as he took a step forward the floor seemed to tilt beneath him; the extreme stress, lack of calories and exhaustion finally taking it's toll and his vision suddenly blurred on him.

His lungs desperately worked to get oxygen back up to his brain so he didn't pass out right there and then, his hand meeting the wall to keep him steady and upright when even with his muffled senses he heard the front door slam shut.

He collapsed into the wall completely, leaning his back against it before sinking down to the carpeted floor.

An almighty cry tearing from his throat seconds after as his hands made it into his hair and gripped tight.

He was gone... Ray was gone and he didn't love him anymore...

He was gone... and he wasn't coming back...


	22. I Said It Was The Last Time Last Time

A/N: I knowwww it's been a good minute.

Lockdown in the UK was lifted and after a whole four months off the industry I work in was finally able to operate again mid July so that's where I've been. Work.

Was determined to get this up though before this weekend and here we are.

Thank you as always to those still following this mess and for leaving me your kind words. They make my day. T^T

Anyways, let's get on with the show shall we?

I give you: Downward spiral Kai.

Enjoy.

K~

* * *

Chapter 22 – I said it was the last time last time.

Knocking the remaining mouthful of his drink back, so used to the amber liquid trickling down his numbed throat he may as well have been sipping on water, Kai set the empty glass back down on the bar counter he was sat at and took a glimpse down to his Rolex watch.

The text said he'd meet him here at ten thirty and it was nearing on midnight now...

He suppressed the low growl wanting to escape his throat.

_Where the __**fuck**__ was he?_

He'd like to say if he was kept waiting any longer he'd just leave and go home but Kai knew he wasn't going anywhere. Not until he got what he wanted at least. Or perhaps even _needed_ right now...

Lifting his head up, he took another glazed look around the dimmed place with his already tired and strained eyes and within seconds his nose crinkled in disgust on what he'd just locked on.

Why is it the second you go through a break up all you see is _love?_

It's everywhere!

Everything from sappy songs on the radio, to seeing couples walking hand in hand...

Can't even come out for a drink without having to watch a game of tonsil tennis going on in the corner. _Ugh_. Put her down, you don't know where she's been...

After another sneer at the oblivious couple, he turned his attention to the aging bartender behind the counter several feet from him serving two males dressed in suits. Upon catching his eye for a moment he silently ordered himself another drink by raising his empty glass up.

He was gonna need another one with _that_ going on in his peripheral vision...

A small sigh escaped through Kai's nose as he let his head drop again and let his blurred out vision zone out further. He stared into his glass like he had the whole world on his shoulders and his mind was both plagued with thoughts yet blank at the same time.

It had been several days since Ray had walked out and left him. Several days since he'd packed up his things and several days since he told him he didn't love him anymore.

Each night since then had been agony.

Kai had messaged him countless times via both text and Facebook, but hadn't gotten a single response back.

He'd called him more times than he'd like to admit but each one went straight to voicemail.

Out of desperation one night he'd even tried to force his way into Tyson's place just to see him, but after being told Ray wasn't even staying with him anymore he had to just leave embarrassed, tail between his legs and come back home; Drowning his sorrows once again in a bottle just so he could try and forget the ache that now resided in his chest.

He was barely sleeping. Had zero appetite. He hadn't even gone into the office or attempted any work at home as he couldn't bring himself to face anyone and it wasn't like he could focus anyway. He just switched his phone off in the end, the relentless calls daily had started to become hard to ignore.

The business could go under for all he cared, he was over it all - Completely.

Wasn't like he'd ever wanted any of it in the first place. It had just been thrust upon him and he had no choice but to go along with it and deal.

It's right what they say - money doesn't buy you happiness at all. His happiness had come from the priceless love of another. It had been Ray that brought him that, and had been all along.

He realised now that without him he was nothing...

Regardless of his many successes, the fame, the fortune...

He was miserable.

Empty.

Broken.

A pathetic shell of a man that didn't care anymore. Couldn't care. Not about anything, anyone and _especially_ not about himself.

Why would he? He was disgusting. A monster.

A worthless, heartless piece of shit that didn't deserve anything but to be alone where the only life he could screw up was his own.

His musings came to a halt when he caught the front door to the bar open in the corner of his eye and took a sly glance to the hooded male that had just sauntered in like he both owned the place and had all the time in the world.

_Finally... Asshole._

The two shared a nod of their heads in acknowledgement once they'd locked onto each other, a short verbal greeting followed, paired with a _very_ brief handshake once the taller one in the hoodie reached where he was sat. Presumably friends or associates at the very least the male behind the counter thought, but he wasn't paying much attention to them now as he started to pour yet another whiskey for the one in the crisp white shirt.

Hiwatari he believed he was called. One of the big shots that owned a corporation not far from here.

How this guy was still standing he wasn't sure but whilst he was tipping and not causing him any trouble he'd keep on serving.

He'd seen this kid a lot lately come to think of it. Every other night he'd come in with slight dishevelled slate hair and kept himself to himself texting on his phone, knocked several drinks back over the space of a few hours and then left.

They'd only ever exchanged a handful of words during the times he'd seen him. Polite pleasantries is all. Wouldn't consider it conversation.

But even with the stoic, unreadable expression and dry cleaned attire he was dressed in to obviously keep up appearances, he could tell the young male was troubled.

He'd served enough businessmen in these parts to recognise when a man was on his knees close to breaking point no matter how well put together they made themselves look on the outside.

Part time drink pourer, part time agony aunt usually. Came along with the job as a barman listening to punters drone on about their life's woes and him give some form of advice, but Hiwatari was clearly the strong and silent type. Never divulged on anything that kid even when he'd asked.

Reaching over the counter, the fresh glass of gold was set down in front of him and Kai fished out and held out a bill in exchange. The male in the hoodie that had been stood beside him walking away now, and had pulled open the front door to leave in the same leisurely way he came, a cool gush of evening air sweeping in before the door came back to a close.

"That was short and sweet?" The older male commented, taking the money being casually held out to him between two fingers and gesturing to the exit on his right. "Just a flying visit?"

Kai made a sound that suggested he hadn't heard him at first as he lazily turned his head to him but upon processing the others words went on to answer him.

"Ah yeah, was just, in the area." He brushed off with a shrug, his lie slurring some as he lifted the fresh whiskey up to his lips again and took a decent swig of it before setting it back down.

"Hey, watch that for me?"

The bartender gave him a curt nod as he dried off a glass with a rag cloth and eyed Kai gingerly ease up from his seat and meander in his inebriated state towards the bathroom door over to the left.

He set the clean glass back on the shelf behind, draped his cloth over his shoulder and rest his hands on the counter.

Sure, he'd watch the drink for him. But getting it spiked was surely the _least_ of the guy's worries considering what he suspected he was willingly about to go and put in his _own_ system in there.

He shook his greying head.

Kid must think he was born yesterday...

Sauntering over to the restrooms, Kai pushed open the wooden door of the gents when his bleary vision locked onto a seemingly younger sandy haired female stepping out of the door adjacent. The mixed aroma of hairspray and perfume radiating through causing him to pause in his tracks.

The two seemed to hold each others intoxicated gaze as she stepped past to leave, their thoughts of each other obvious and Kai's line of vision even dared to drop lower on her once she had turned to sashay back to her mojito.

He wasn't usually a fan of blondes but those green eyes were gorgeous...

Unsticking his feet he pushed his way inside and Kai scanned himself over in the large mirrors that sat above the sinks. Fussing with his hair some he straightened his shirt too before slipping into a stall after concluding the place was empty.

Having shut the door and locked it behind him, he reached into his trouser pocket and pulled out the small ziplock bag the dealer had slyly passed to him when they shook hands. His hazy eyes examining it, checking for, _fuck_ _knows_ _what_, before he got down to it.

He hadn't done this since before he and Ray had got together. Hadn't needed such a high anymore as just the mere scent of the other male took him straight to cloud nine.

For someone trained to be so strong willed he really was weak when it came to any form of temptation...

If only he'd have resisted this time though then Ray would still be by his side and he wouldn't be knelt down about to do what he was. They could've worked through it all. Fixed it somehow...

However it was only a matter a time anyway before Ray finally saw sense and moved on to someone more stable. Though, Mariah was a debateable choice on that one.

Whilst Ray had screamed to him that he didn't care for the girl and she was nothing to him, (which he half believed...) there was nowhere else he could possibly be right now.

If he wasn't at Tyson's then where the hell was he? He had to be with her...

Unless of course Tyson had just been covering for him and he'd been hiding upstairs the entire time but like any of it mattered anymore.

They were done, finished. Ray didn't want him anymore and that was that.

_Anyone_ would be a better choice than himself right now so he didn't exactly blame Ray for shutting him out and wanting to move on... Still didn't erase the fact his entire spirit was crushed and he wasn't even sure if he wanted to go on anymore.

Okay that was dramatic. He didn't want to die but... he wasn't exactly keen on living either.

He felt like he was right back to that eighteen year old that had been thrown in at the deep end in running a company making billions annually simply because of his last name. Dealing with mountains of paperwork on the daily, a phone stuck to his ear for hours on end and _constant_ fucking emails wanting _something_ from him.

Stressed out to all hell and having no one there to support him through any of it or help him see the light at the other end of the tunnel.

He was entirely numb to all that he was going through right now.

Thinking about it, he could have gone into work perhaps. Make a last attempt at trying to convince himself he could go back to normal. Bounce back like nothing had happened and he was fine.

Was only a relationship. Big deal.

He'd had walked away from many all throughout his life and hadn't given them a second thought.

But like Kai had really gone back in time, things were far from fine and he was right back to turning to anything that would make him forget his actuality, drown out the mental torment and help him _feel_ something - _anything._

Oh. And like shit wasn't bad enough, just to add insult to injury, it was clear that redheaded prick had grown bored of him too.

The tables royally turning there seeing how it had been Kai reaching out for the sin late at night now. Sometimes Tala entertained him and responded, sometimes he didn't.

He guessed the thrill of it all had passed now for him since it would only be Tala doing wrong. Now it was all one sided he was no longer clinging to whatever fantasy the two of them had created, and had been so desperate to continue that had ultimately destroyed only one man's reality.

It boiled his blood knowing Tala probably just skipped right on home after that. Sauntered through the front door with his usual strut and gave a kiss to his wife and child like he hadn't just been balls deep in someone else half an hour earlier.

_God_ he was an asshole...

Kai had actually toyed with the idea of making their whole seedy affair public knowledge. Accidentally on purpose let slip to Tiffany about it all who would undoubtedly run straight to Bianca, do his dirty work and tell all.

Why should he be the only one suffering the consequences here?

Why should he be the only one sat here alone, drinking the pain away every night whilst _he_ was still all shacked up with his family like nothing had fucking happened?!

Tala had chased _him_!

Sure, he didn't exactly run from him, had allowed it all, but he hadn't been the initiator in _any_ of this.

Kai couldn't bring himself to do it though...

If Bianca hadn't already had the baby by now she was dangerously close to, and receiving that kind of news would surely be devastating. It would rip the entire family apart and he didn't want to be the one responsible for that.

He knew what it was like to grow up with an absent father and even though it had taken two to tango if Tala wasn't going to be a man and admit to what he'd done, then he could just go on and live with it for the rest of his life, he didn't give a damn.

Karma would come to bite him in the ass eventually. Once a cheater always a cheater, right? Was only a matter of time before he got caught... But for now, what Bianca didn't know wouldn't hurt her he figured.

So, with all that said and done, his own life gone to shit once again, what else was he supposed to do when hard liquor and casual sex wasn't cutting it anymore?

Go for something stronger.

As Kai knelt on the black tiled floor, he lowered the toilet seat to a close for his makeshift table, and reached for his wallet to pull out his credit card and a paper note.

His glazed eyes darkened as he carefully opened up the small ziplock bag, tipped it and tapped out some of the white powder onto the lid before using the black card to separate the pile and manipulate it to cut himself two thin lines.

Setting the credit card down, he tightly rolled up the bill and positioned himself over one of the trails, pushing his other nostril to a close with a finger and sharply inhaled.

Immediately lifting himself up he tilted his head back and forcefully sniffed a few times, pinching at his nostrils to diminish the burning sensation within them now before leaning down again and snorting the other line in the same fashion.

Screwing his eyes shut he let out a grunt, rubbing at his nose again and once he was satisfied nothing remained within them his fair hand then dusted away any residual evidence of what he'd just resorted back to and let out an exhale from his mouth.

This scene was a whole new low for him. He realised that. Turning to drugs whilst alone in the male's restroom was something he'd never imagine he'd sink to.

When he was younger snorting lines was only a social thing. Almost strictly in fact.

The outside world and 'businessman lifestyle' was all new for him of course, and it was only natural he'd end up getting mixed up with a whole new bunch of associates, but he didn't want to be another statistic. He knew booze and drugs didn't mix well so didn't fancy risking his life on the regular like most did.

Coke was just the norm for this industry which he quickly learned. Kept the people of importance going when deadlines needed to be met and they were losing steam.

Coffee in the morning, cocaine in the afternoon.

Work hard and party harder so they say...

Wasn't exactly his style but he couldn't stand the numbness anymore at the time.

Easing himself up from the floor with a slight groan, Kai's back instantly met the side of the stall. The whiskey alone was having him stagger and sway so needed something to steady himself and allow his mind to space out further than what the alcohol buzz was already doing for him.

Whilst it had been a while he knew it wouldn't be long until the effects of the drug took hold of him, and true to his memory within minutes a rush of euphoria engulfed him causing his eyes to roll to a close, his head to fall back against the stall wall and the bill to unravel from his fingers and drop to the tiled floor.

There it was. Finally. He felt something_._

Riding on the high he raised his hand and slid it down his cheek. His face may have felt numb to touch, but the feeling that was coursing through his veins now had him feeling on top of the world.

Disgusting? Worthless?

Kai chuckled to himself.

Ray never fucking deserved him anyways, was hardly a loss.

He gave that guy everything and it wasn't ever enough. Odd for someone who came from nothing but a flea ridden village; He'd have thought he'd have been fucking grateful to save him from all that. Worshipped the damn ground he walked on like so many others had done before him and still do.

Did Ray not realise he could've had _anyone_ he damn well pleased and he'd chosen _him_ of all people? He'd had his choice of anyone he desired before because it had been easy pickings! He'd lost count of how many men and women had practically flung themselves in his direction, legs wide open, offering themselves to him on a silver platter and like the absolute God's gift he was had feasted daily like a king.

Did Ray not know whose arm he'd had the privilege of hanging off of all these years?!

He'd given him fucking _everything_. Did he really think he'd have a decent job, in the best restaurant in town if it wasn't for him?! A nice home? Like hell would Ray have accomplished such things on his own if it wasn't for _his_ damn influence.

Yet here he was, spending every night with some village lowlife being his reason to wallow in self pity. Drowning his sorrows and think he had nothing to live for.

Another laugh escaped him.

The fuck was he so upset for?! Really?! He knew he was a catch!

Successful, loaded, ridiculously good looking, hung like a fucking horse!

The list goes on!

He could have Ray replaced by the end of the damn night if he wanted to!

Clumsily opening up the restroom door, legs seeming like he could run a marathon with the amount of energy he felt he possessed right now, they remained in place though as Kai locked with the same green eyes from earlier that had clearly lingered and waited for him by the door.

Excluding how brazenly he'd looked her up and down just now, his entire demeanour was far from suggestive as he leisurely swaggered out. Almost seemed like he wasn't giving her a second thought and was just heading back to his seat, but apparently he was still inviting all the same as the blonde dared to step beside him, link her arm within his and walk like they were already an item.

He silently followed her lead as she took a slight detour heading for the back door and assured him he shouldn't worry as she just wanted to 'show him something.'

Kai's lips curled into a mischievous smirk.

And people claimed he was unapproachable...

Things were going to be absolutely fine. He needn't have gotten himself so worked up. A small fix was all he'd needed. He wasn't even giving Ray a second thought now that his tongue was forcibly swirling with another and his hands were groping at what they could.

He pressed blondie back up against the stone wall in the alleyway, her hands just as hungry for him as they found their way into his hair and down by his crotch. Two intoxicated bodies becoming rapidly familiar with the scent and taste of the other as Kai roughly sought for dominance and took it with ease.

One of his hands quickly found its way under her skirt and she instantly melted under his touch. The same way they always did, deeply under his spell and Kai knew it so took full advantage.

The whole scene was a heated blur. The cool night air assisting somewhat but with heart rates racing along with wandering hands and grinding hips it didn't provide much solace.

His hand slithered out from where it had nestled between her legs, wet fingers snaking all the way up her slender body before crawling behind her neck and taking a fist full of hair to roughly yank her head away from his lips and break the kiss.

She let out a helpless whimper though smirked up at him ready for his command.

"_Get on your knees._"

He felt invincible. Sitting on a whole new level of arrogance right now that would even surpass Tala's especially as she obliged to the order without protest and sunk to the floor with her coy smile still intact. Her manicured nails pawing and cupping at the bulge before making quick work at undoing Kai's belt.

Emerald was fixed upon ruby the entire time as her tongue prepared her plump lips with a flirtatious lick of them before setting Kai free from his pants and engulfing him whole.

His white teeth sunk into his lower lip and a grunt escaped his throat at the warm sloppy sensation that was now around him. One of his hands rested up on the wall in front of him whilst the other raked through the blonde hair and forcefully guided her to quickly learn and adapt her throat to take it just how he liked.

He was a dangerous man when in this current reckless state.

He was a force to be reckoned with on a normal day but being fuelled by drugs not even Kai recognised the man he was right now.

Tears started to stream from the eyes below along with muffled chokes at the rough assault on her throat but Kai gave no regard. He didn't care for her well-being in the slightest so long as he got what he wanted...

And he _always_ got what he wanted.

He suppressed his moans of pleasure as the random mouth worked him, being mindful that they were in a public place, but gave credit where it was due. Praising the female with domineering words of encouragement, he stroked almost lovingly at her head bobbing up and down him and gazed with lust filled eyes at the performance.

She wasn't the best, though far from the worst. Was clear she'd had many a dick in her mouth but he felt men just knew how to do this better...

Several minutes of bliss passed by when the fistful Kai had on the light strands tightened and a curse came from his throat. Throwing his head back his body shook with his release, his lips parting in a silent cry as the high of his orgasm was intensified immensely with the cocktail of substances currently soaring through his system.

He continued to roughly use the mouth like he would his own hand, easing her head up and down, riding it out until the ripples of pleasure simmered and the grip on the hair loosened.

He finally graced her with eye contact. Her mascara smudged some though his expression still lust drunk all the same as cum started to spill from the swollen lips that were still wrapped around him.

He slowly pulled himself out of her mouth, his already husky tone coming out even darker as he ran his thumb over the smeared red lipstick and gave his order before she even thought about doing anything else.

"_Swallow_."

With his hand cupping her jaw and his thumb pressed against her lips she reluctantly obeyed, wanting to please the attractive stranger further even though she knew she'd never see him again after tonight.

Kai's expression remained plain as he'd expected the obedience completely.

"_Good girl..." _He purred, allowing her to stand.

Tucking himself back into his trousers the blonde rose back to her feet and too adjusted her leather skirt. She foolishly went onto her tiptoes for a kiss though once Kai had pulled up his zipper he turned on his heel and strolled away from her.

He'd heard a scoff come from behind and an insult was hurled his way immediately after though like he cared what some slut who gives head in alleyways thinks of him.

What was she expecting, a thank you?

He could chuck her a twenty he figured but he was already back onto the main street and his parked car was now in sight.

Was time to go home and put another shitty day to bed.

Part of him knew he shouldn't drive.

He was high but he wasn't stupid.

He'd even said to himself as he continued to stumble on towards his car that he should get a cab; leave the Merc where it was and come get it in the morning. He'd get a parking ticket sure, but would hardly break the bank.

It was another part of him that was in control though. The super confident doped up on whiskey and cocaine part of him that assured him there'd be barely any traffic on the roads right now given how late it was and he'd be fine.

He was a good driver.

He'd be _way_ over the limit, but was ok, he felt fine.

The buzz from the coke was wearing off now anyways.

He'd be fine.

Kai slumped into the driver's seat, entire body feeling heavy as he took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. His pale hands circling the steering wheel in front like he was familiarising himself with it.

Now he was finally alone, all sounds of music, chatter and other distractions leaving his ears, the thoughts that plagued him started to creep back. Haunting him almost.

Whilst he was in the company of others he was left be but the second he was by himself...

He raked both hands through his hair, taking in another breath though it was shuddered.

That was the problem with cocaine, the high never lasted all that long.

For once he wished the problems he'd left on the ground would have disappeared by the time he came back down but they were always still right there waiting for him. Taunting him almost.

He snapped his eyes back open as his head had lulled forward. The rain that had started to come down, pattering on his wind shield had provided him with a moment of peace. He wasn't ready to take it yet though.

He had to get home. Was only a few blocks away. Ten minutes if that. Fifteen max if he took it steady now with the down pour. Then he could crawl into bed, and attempt to get some much needed sleep.

Starting up the car, Kai pulled away from the street he was parked on and just like he'd suspected, it was late, and there wasn't a single car in sight. Maybe the odd taxi but the roads were pretty much clear.

With his hand resting on the steering wheel, he let out a yawn and propped his other arm up bent against the window, his head resting on the palm of his hand.

With the heavy rain and the windscreen wipers being the only noise caressing his ears Kai zoned out and let his mind wander...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Move in with me..."

The sudden blurt from across the dinner table caused Ray to choke on his food, the comfortable silence that had fallen upon them as they ate well and truly broken now as he coughed and pat on his chest to help get it down.

"W-what?" he managed once he'd swallowed, his wide eyes locked on the male opposite.

"I said move in with me." Kai repeated in a small awkward chuckle, thinking now that perhaps he'd jumped the gun here but he'd been wanting to bring this up for over a week now.

Things had been going great between them the past few weeks. Amazing in fact.

Ray pretty much stayed most nights of the week here anyway so, it made sense, no?

"I know we said we'd take things slow, and you can of course say no if you're not ready, but..." Kai played with his food some, moving it around on his plate before looking up again.

"I just want you to know Ray that this isn't just a fling to me... I'm honestly the happiest I've been, in a _long_ time, and it's all because of you..."

Ray's heart swelled as Kai's words settled in his ears.

First he cooks him dinner and then drowns him in an outpour of emotion that he'd never seen from him before.

Was this really the same moody kid from all those years ago?

"Kai..."

"Will you?"

"Yes..."

Kai felt like he could burst. Standing up from his end of the table he stepped over to Ray where he was sat, cupped his face and pressed his lips against his.

"Good... I'll let you have some ice cream now with your chocolate pudding."

Ray made a face though chuckled.

"Wait. So if I'd have said no I wasn't going to get dessert?"

"Oh no, you'd have got dessert." Kai assured, waving him off as he sat back into his seat opposite and reached for his glass of wine. "But I'd have just saved all the ice cream for myself once you left..."

Ray's chuckle transitioned into belly laugh once he briefly saw the small pout before it was hidden by the rim of the glass.

"Aw Kai!" He continued to laugh. "Well, you always were one to sulk when you didn't get your own way... probably for the best I accepted. Don't want you crying into a tub of ice cream all night over me."

Kai smirked setting his glass down.

"My waistline thanks you."

The laughter that had settled erupted once more, and there did end up being a lot of tears that night as the light hearted banter they often dealt out continued further into the evening, the ice cream being shared between two spoons over a movie snuggled up on the couch.

"I don't get it!" Ray complained, pointing his spoon at the TV. "So he loves her, but she loves _him, _but _he's _the bad guy?"

Kai burst out laughing again, another set of tears ready to fall from his eyes, as he held onto his tight stomach. He must've explained the plot to him three times now, if he wasn't getting it by now there was no hope for the kid.

The arm that was around him squeezed him a little tighter.

God he loved this man... he'd leave that confession for another day though...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kai just let the silent tears fall down his cheeks. Stinging eyes looking to the blurred road ahead of him though weren't focused at all.

He missed him.

Missed him so much it fucking hurt.

No amount of work, substance, or therapy would erase that fact.

He didn't need a drink, a line or even a fucking holiday, he just needed him!

He roughly wiped at his heavy eyes and sniffled feeling utterly helpless.

Five more minutes... he'd be home in five more minutes...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I love you."

Ray's senses were still clouded, chest graced with a thin film of sweat, heaving slightly as he caught his breath. The waves of tingling pleasure starting to simmer throughout his body as he came down from his high.

His heart was racing, even more so now at finally hearing what he'd been dying to say himself for a while now though hadn't wanted to scare Kai off.

Whilst he knew his old team captain had mellowed immensely over the years, when it came to expressing how he felt he was still the same old Kai. Sure he was a lot more open to a degree, but nine times out of ten he still kept everything bottled up until he couldn't hold it any more and burst.

He rolled his heavy head to the male beside him, taking in the dishevelled slate hair and soft expression.

"You do?" He breathed out, and Kai nodded to him to confirm.

Easing himself up onto his arm Kai hovered over him like he had been the past hour. A fair hand stroking at the tanned cheek before going to move a stray lock of hair off Ray's clammy face.

"Have done for a while." He admitted in a hushed tone, "Just didn't want to scare you off I guess..."

Ray huffed a laugh as he leant into the soft touch.

"That's why _I_ hadn't said it yet. Didn't want to scare _you_ off."

Kai seemed to frown some, his own mind still fogged up right now as he put two and two together.

"Wait, so you...?"

Ray let out another soft chuckle.

"Yes Kai..." He figured he was going to have to spell this one out for him.

"I love you too... have done for a while..."

It took a moment, but once the words had registered in his mind Kai's face actually lit up, giving Ray one of his rare warm smiles before he lowered himself and pressed his lips against the others.

"I love you." Kai then repeated when he broke the kiss, a childlike giddiness clear in his tone and his smile transitioning to a grin as he gazed down at him.

Ray reached up and cupped his cheek.

"I love you t-"

"-I love you." Kai interrupted, the three words he never imagined himself ever uttering rolling out of him now shamelessly, tone seeming like both a statement and a question at the same time. The realisation had been amazing before, but actually _saying _it a loud was something else entirely!

"I love you! I love you, I love you, I love you!"

He buried his face into Ray's neck, placing quick tickling kisses along his skin whilst his hands went at his sides, laughter coming from Ray in an instant.

Kai felt like some kind of weight had been lifted of his shoulders. The worry he'd originally held long gone now.

He loved him, and Ray loved him back.

Sleep had been amazing ever since Ray had moved in, closing his eyes and waking up to that gorgeous face he couldn't get enough of. Though that night, knowing what he did now, it was especially a good nights sleep...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kai's eyes drowsily prized back open when the blaring sound of a car horn made it to ears. His eyes immediately shooting wide with fear at the sight of two bright headlights staring back at him dead on.

A cried expletive ripped through his throat and completely on autopilot grabbed hold of the steering wheel with both hands and quickly turned it to dodge the oncoming truck.

With the speed he was going the abrupt change of direction caused the car to not only swerve but spin. The tyres screeching along the wet tarmac as he desperately tried to recover from the harsh manoeuvre.

As skilled of a driver he was, even if he was completely sober he didn't have a chance in hell of regaining control of the car, especially with the heavy rain beating down causing there to be less friction on the road.

The momentum was unwavering, the whole thing seeming to occur in slow motion when before Kai knew it he was turning.

The car had flipped.

Completely disorientated all he could do was brace himself, cradling his head with his arms to protect himself as the car continued to overturn, his seatbelt clinging to him for dear life, painfully digging into his skin refraining him from being launched out of the now cracked windscreen though his body was still being flung and jerked like a rag doll.

The sound of glass shattering and metal bending and dragging along the solid concrete was almost deafening.

The air bag within his steering wheel had detonated, causing the shards of glass from both the driver and passenger side windows to fly around him, grazing and slicing his skin.

It seemed an eternity before the car's momentum died down and finally came to halt. Feeling like he was on a deadly roller-coaster for hours the car settled and landed thankfully the right way up.

His arms fell limp to his side, his chest panting in and out of him like he'd just sprinted a mile, lungs working over time trying to come to terms with all that had transpired the last 30 seconds. His eyes glazed over as he slipped in and out of consciousness, desperately trying to stay focused on the cracked windscreen to stay awake.

The air bag in front of him started to slowly deflate and after a few minutes he'd regained control of his breathing though his heart still pounded in his chest.

His eyes blurred over again and a single tear rolled down his cut cheek, mixing with his blood and landing on his white collar.

He just sat there. Perhaps too shocked to move, or more so in acceptance.

He knew he shouldn't let his eyes fall closed. That was rule number one of a potential concussion. But he couldn't keep them open anymore.

He was tired. Drained.

Physically, mentally and emotionally.

He was done.

A faint siren was heard in the distance and blue lights were the last thing he saw.

And then everything faded to black...


End file.
